What are some more of your pet peeves?

[Amina Sopwith]

9 minutes ago, MelodicRain said:

You do realize it's a metaphor right? 

I don't think that's a metaphor, but whether or not it is, I think you could have found a better way to express yourself. 

[Sammy Huntsman]

22 minutes ago, MelodicRain said:

You do realize it's a metaphor right? How would I know if they're autistic unless I'm their physician? I just don't have the patience to deal with pointless conversations like that with people who clearly have no intention in talking, yet decides to IM me anyways for some reason. I consider it a form of trolling. Yes they may actually be autistic but I'm here to have fun, not torture myself with people who are not worth my time. The example I gave isn't even the worst one, it usually goes something like this:

Well I am on the autism spectrum and I can't tell certain social cues from a hole in the ground. Lol. That all being said, you could have used a better word. Here I am about ready to fight you in forums, and well you explained yourself. So I gotta put those digital fists away.

[MoiraKathleen]

People that feel the need to associate some type of label to put down someone instead of describing what it was about the person's behavior that bothered them.

[Arielle Popstar]

Quote

[xx:xx] Random person: waves
[xx:xx] Me: waves back/smiles

I've usually seen that as just an acknowledgement of each others presence/reality without any need to take it any further. Same as it would be in R/L if two strangers caught each others eyes in some random public area. No need to get into some long conversation, just a friendly acknowledgement of each other and life moves on.

[Madelaine McMasters]

5 hours ago, MelodicRain said:

You do realize it's a metaphor right?

I don't.

Edited August 23, 2020 by Madelaine McMasters

[Garnet Psaltery]

12 hours ago, MelodicRain said:

You do realize it's a metaphor right? How would I know if they're autistic unless I'm their physician? I just don't have the patience to deal with pointless conversations like that with people who clearly have no intention in talking, yet decides to IM me anyways for some reason. I consider it a form of trolling. Yes they may actually be autistic but I'm here to have fun, not torture myself with people who are not worth my time. The example I gave isn't even the worst one, it usually goes something like this:

 

You admit you cannot tell whether someone is autistic yet you feel entitled to say that someone who has no intention of saying anything more than a greeting, which you regard as pointless and trolling, is autistic.  There is no excuse for that.  You should apologise to @halebore Aeon.

[Nick0678]

I just find it annoying when i open the fridge in the middle of the night to get me some cold water and all i find inside are 3-4 almost empty bottles and all the full bottles outside of it being warm as piss, also when i am taking a nap and a woman comes to bed with cold hands and puts them on my abdomen. Seriously wtf.. (i don't mind cold feet though). I suppose i am a difficult person for someone to live with.

[Dano Seale]

34 minutes ago, Nick0678 said:

I just find it annoying when i open the fridge in the middle of the night to get me some cold water and all i find inside are 3-4 almost empty bottles and all the full bottles outside of it being warm as piss, also when i am taking a nap and a woman comes to bed with cold hands and puts them on my abdomen. Seriously wtf.. (i don't mind cold feet though). I suppose i am a difficult person for someone to live with.

Seems obvious to me who your cold water thief is......case closed!  👮‍♂️

[Chroma Starlight]

20 hours ago, MelodicRain said:

I just don't have the patience to deal with pointless conversations like that with people who clearly have no intention in talking, yet decides to IM me anyways for some reason. I consider it a form of trolling. Yes they may actually be autistic but I'm here to have fun, not torture myself with people who are not worth my time.

You could just put in your profile a list of all classes of people in the world that you intend to wrongfully discriminate against and then follow that up with a statement affirming that you feel you have no obligation as a human being or member of society to treat others well or be anything more than compulsively dedicated to your hatred of socially pluralistic neurodiversity. Allow me to earnestly suggest that you go and find for yourself a society of malice suitable to your special needs, but I suspect that may not be Second Life.

People who degrade the neurodivergent are another one of my pet peeves.

Edited August 23, 2020 by Chroma Starlight

[Robin Kiyori]

The irony in the last two pages is that most autistic people hate small talk. It's one of those common soical things we struggle wth. So dragging autstic folk into that peeve made no sense. We're more like to have a topic on hand and in my case turn mute if left having to think of how to continue a chat about nothing.

 

To stay on topic:

Pet peeve: the lack of non sexualised masculine clothing for v-tech chests.

 

[Rowan Amore]

Women's jeans not being sized like men's jeans.  I've struggled my entire life to find jeans long enough. For some reason, they assume all women have an average inseam yet men don't.  Sure, a few brands make tall sizes but still, it's a generalized tall.  Petite is usually around 28", regular 30" and tall 32".  Men's go in one inch increments.  Why can't they do that for women.  I've often bought men's jeans just to get a 34" or 36" if I'd like to wear them with anything besides flats.

SL...where all my pants are the right length!!!!!

[Maryanne Solo]

On 8/23/2020 at 5:46 AM, MelodicRain said:

Conversations with autists like this. Don't IM if you have nothing to say, like are they expecting me to read their mind and start the conversation or something??

An unfortunate choice of words
I'm borderline Autistic/Axe Murdress/Ginger.
We quite often go "\0_"  or 8^) in main chat, while passing.

[MelodicRain]

On 8/23/2020 at 12:42 PM, Chroma Starlight said:

You could just put in your profile a list of all classes of people in the world that you intend to wrongfully discriminate against and then follow that up with a statement affirming that you feel you have no obligation as a human being or member of society to treat others well or be anything more than compulsively dedicated to your hatred of socially pluralistic neurodiversity. Allow me to earnestly suggest that you go and find for yourself a society of malice suitable to your special needs, but I suspect that may not be Second Life.

People who degrade the neurodivergent are another one of my pet peeves.

People like you who overcomplicate things, add that to my pet peeves as well. Who's the one sounding hateful now? I'm sure your post is very nice and polite eh? I literally just wrote all I meant is that I hate pointless conversations, learn to scroll up and read. English is not my first language so yes I may not have used the best word "autistic", I'm sorry if that offended people and their grandmothers. When people exclaim "that sounds retarded" do you people actually think they mean the person have the actual medical condition? I forgot how insanely sensitive this forum is when it comes to absolutely every damn thing and takes every word at face value.

Also explain to me why it has anything to do with you that I don't like to waste time with pointless conversations? If your logic holds are all vegetarians supposed to apologize to all meat-eaters whenever they eat? "Oh I'm sorry it offends you that I hate meat". Some people like you don't mind pointless conversations consisting of one emoji pasted 10 times, some people like me hate them, *****ing deal with it.

Edited August 24, 2020 by MelodicRain

[Amina Sopwith]

58 minutes ago, MelodicRain said:

I'm sorry if that offended people and their grandmothers. 

This isn't an apology. It's sarcasm and not very good sarcasm either. 

58 minutes ago, MelodicRain said:

 When people exclaim "that sounds retarded" do you people actually think they mean the person have the actual medical condition? 

No, but it's still an incredibly ignorant and offensive thing to say, even and especially if someone does actually have a learning disability. And a fair number of us have said so, and will say so, if we need to. Like right now.

58 minutes ago, MelodicRain said:

 I forgot how insanely sensitive this forum is when it comes to absolutely every damn thing and takes every word at face value.

We tend not to take well to disablist language. Though people are generally forgiving if it was a genuine error, made in sheer ignorance, a proper apology is given and the lesson learned. If you don't like that, and clearly you don't, then this may well not be the place for you. Personally I'll stay.

Edited August 24, 2020 by Amina Sopwith

[Madelaine McMasters]

1 hour ago, MelodicRain said:

I forgot how insanely sensitive this forum is when it comes to absolutely every damn thing and takes every word at face value.

The forums are inhabited by many people of different stripes. It has become a bit more contentious lately, but I still think it's a very long way from being "insanely sensitive" and I'm pretty sure it's not so for "absolutely every damn thing". Nor do I see it taking "every word at face value". If it did, I'd have been banned for setting people on fire long ago.

If I can get away with setting people on fire and you feel vilified, could it be that people are NOT taking what we say at face value but are actually reading beyond our words to judge intent?

That's what I do.

Edited August 24, 2020 by Madelaine McMasters

[Lillith Hapmouche]

Perhaps some folks are simply insane a**holes who cannot deal with a slap in return.

[Orwar]

1 hour ago, MelodicRain said:

I forgot how insanely sensitive this forum is when it comes to absolutely every damn thing and takes every word at face value.

   Whilst it's understandable and excusable to make mistakes when communicating, especially if it isn't in your first language, that's also the only thing we have on these forums. Textual conversation where we don't have any tone of voice for emphasis or facial expressions to read. Using expressions such as 'retarded' are generally frowned upon these days, even if they were used quite frequently some years back and continue to be used by some people who tend to be viewed as insensitive, ignorant or socially inept by most people.

   There is however a difference between making a mistake, and saying 'I did an oopsie, my apologies', and defiantly standing by your mistake and continuing to argue even as people are pointing out to you that you erred.

---

   Today's pet peeve . . . Veganites. And no, not the fictional mineral from Dr Who. 

[Chroma Starlight]

9 hours ago, MelodicRain said:

People like you who overcomplicate things, add that to my pet peeves as well. English is not my first language so yes I may not have used the best word "autistic", I'm sorry if that offended people and their grandmothers. When people exclaim "that sounds retarded" do you people actually think they mean the person have the actual medical condition? I forgot how insanely sensitive this forum is when it comes to absolutely every damn thing and takes every word at face value.

Also explain to me why it has anything to do with you that I don't like to waste time with pointless conversations? If your logic holds are all vegetarians supposed to apologize to all meat-eaters whenever they eat? "Oh I'm sorry it offends you that I hate meat". Some people like you don't mind pointless conversations consisting of one emoji pasted 10 times, some people like me hate them, *****ing deal with it.

It's fair enough to say the detail minders can be annoying, even when we aren't being confrontational. Your written English is excellent and better than any second language skills I hold. I don't know many people who get upset about others eating vegetables because usually nobody gets hurt, but ideas with an appearance of bigotry can be widely hurtful in substantive ways when circulated widely enough. I'm not the boss of you, you didn't break any rules by speaking generally, and I admire your forthrightness about your feelings on this topic. This is your Second Life. 

[AdminGirl]

9 hours ago, MelodicRain said:

People like you who overcomplicate things, add that to my pet peeves as well. Who's the one sounding hateful now? I'm sure your post is very nice and polite eh? I literally just wrote all I meant is that I hate pointless conversations, learn to scroll up and read. English is not my first language so yes I may not have used the best word "autistic", I'm sorry if that offended people and their grandmothers. When people exclaim "that sounds retarded" do you people actually think they mean the person have the actual medical condition? I forgot how insanely sensitive this forum is when it comes to absolutely every damn thing and takes every word at face value.

Also explain to me why it has anything to do with you that I don't like to waste time with pointless conversations? If your logic holds are all vegetarians supposed to apologize to all meat-eaters whenever they eat? "Oh I'm sorry it offends you that I hate meat". Some people like you don't mind pointless conversations consisting of one emoji pasted 10 times, some people like me hate them, *****ing deal with it.

I personally didn't think you meant it in any offensive way. But if someone points out that it was taken offensively, a genuine apology is usually enough for everyone to move on, imo anyway.

I think there's a huge difference between communicating in person to people you know vs. textually to a group of people you don't know. In person, you know your audience, you know who you would and would not be offending. I'm sure if you were with a friend who was autistic, you wouldn't have used the same wording to express yourself. Here, there are people from a whole range of different backgrounds and situations that we're not aware of, and applying the same type of sensitivity that you would towards a friend is one way to not offend unintentionally but is probably also the reason why it may seem more "sensitive" here.

A peeve for myself (to stay on topic!) is my tendency to over-think before saying or typing anything.

[Maryanne Solo]

I would not have posted as I did if I had known English was not Melodics first language.

I do apologise to you MelodicRain. Sorry. 🤐

 

[Lillith Hapmouche]

Other languages to know manners just as well, though. Or insults...

Saying "Du Autist, dein Autismus-Level ist weit über 100" is just as insulting in German as it would be in English.

[Krystina Ferraris]

Well leaving aside the offensive tone and all that, your choice of words to describe the behaviour of that "Random person" in that specific social context is actually plain wrong.

I am on the spectrum, I have Asperger's, and I can confirm that an autistic person would avoid that kind of interaction like the plague. I have never, ever approached anyone first and never ever been able to hold on a conversation outside of my interests. Small talk is not, in my personal experience, a very common autistic trait  at all.

[Seicher Rae]

We're still on this topic? Oy. Instead of doubling down on a mistake (innocent or otherwise), here's a PRO tip (and I do mean that, I am nearly professional at "oops"):

If you meant that you simply hate pointless conversations, then it might have been a good idea to have written just that instead of what you did. However you didn't. 

Instead you obviously annoyed people and they told you why.

In that case: I'm sorry that I offended. It was a poor choice of words and not my intent to offend.

^^^ Would have been all that was necessary. Note that it is not "I'm sorry IF..."   Note that there is no but being used as a conjunction.

If you wanted to you could have said, "It was a poor choice of words, English is not my first language. It was not my intent to offend."

 

[Seicher Rae]

2 hours ago, Maryanne Solo said:

I would not have posted as I did if I had known English was not Melodics first language.

I do apologise to you MelodicRain. Sorry. 🤐

 

Good example of a simple apology, that covers all the bases. Live and learn folks.

(I find it ironic that just a few pages before this current fracas that bad, faux apologies was a brief peeve topic.)

[So Whimsy]

1 hour ago, Lillith Hapmouche said:

Other languages to know manners just as well, though. Or insults...

Saying "Du Autist, dein Autismus-Level ist weit über 100" is just as insulting in German as it would be in English.

I was about to come out of my hole to point this out as well but you beat me to it.

Can't agree more.

The individual using that 'phrase' knew full well what they were saying and it's insulting AF, now they're back pedaling and blaming language difference. No, that's not how it works.