Warning signs

[Bree Giffen]

An avatar walks up to you and wants to be your friend. What signs do you look for to decide if they are a good or bad choice?

[Nick0678]

Complexity and script load.

[Gopi Passiflora]

If they IM with just a "hi hru" and we were not acquainted before, then it's a nope.

[Rowan Amore]

It's a warning sign if ANY avatar walks up to me and wants to be friends.  Who does that?   "Hey, perfect stranger!  Let's be friends!".  Umm, NO.

[Gregorian Chant]

When they demand teh sexxor.

[Jordyn McGregor]

1 hour ago, Bree Giffen said:

An avatar walks up to you and wants to be your friend. 

 

[Lucia Nightfire]

I don't friend strangers.

I tell them so.

I tell them maybe after we've run into/talked with each other a few more times.

The only exception is when business matters/relationships are involved.

[Bree Giffen]

Warning signs for me would be:

A blank profile and they were born that same day.

Any mention of a 'family' in the profile.

I press ctrl-alt-t and numerous hidden body parts are revealed.

Can't really think of something that would make me instantly accept a friendship. Maybe if they looked like a puppy. 

[Echelon Alcott]

3 hours ago, Bree Giffen said:

An avatar walks up to you and wants to be your friend. What signs do you look for to decide if they are a good or bad choice?

 

[Zzevir]

4 hours ago, Rowan Amore said:

It's a warning sign if ANY avatar walks up to me and wants to be friends.  Who does that?   "Hey, perfect stranger!  Let's be friends!".  Umm, NO.

My daughter. But she is only wee. 

[SlammedSam]

I'm not sure I'd care to be friends with just any random stranger. I generally pass at least 19 times out of 20. One best make one heck of an impression on me to accept such a request. Otherwise, only way I'd accept if it's established that one is an alt of a friend, and my friends tend to be good about that. Though that's really not a stranger in that case.

Now, if I am reading the profile of a total stranger, and I see something that I don't like, or gives me a bad vibe, or I come to see a large number of groups that I find objectionable, or revolve around sex, I tend to not only decline the request, I also wind up muting/blocking that person.

Edited October 8, 2021 by SlammedSam
Re-read the thread title, and decided I had more to add.

[Anna Nova]

We are experiencing the evolution of the Americanish Lingo.  (Used to be called Anglish, or something like that)

There were once words like 'like', and 'friend' that meant something real, but then the net demons (the worst is called Zukerblob, or something like that) invaded people's brains and made those words mean completely new things.

A friend is someone you are prepared to die with.  Not another avatar in a simulation.  There is no such noun as a 'like', it's an adjective.

Edited October 8, 2021 by Anna Nova
typo

[Arduenn Schwartzman]

6 hours ago, Bree Giffen said:

An avatar walks up to you and wants to be your friend. What signs do you look for to decide if they are a good or bad choice?

Assuming you mean a complete stranger you only had a five-minute conversation with: none. I'll take the offer immediately.

And then I will IM them every day about trivial matters, ask them about their real life incessantly (eventually whether they have a bank account) and offer them teleports to everywhere I go (Cannibal Island, The Carnival of Rubbery Rides, etc.) and ask them to 'come sit on this funny-looking couch with me' and propose to meet in real life until they decide to unfriend me themselves and learn to never randomly offer friendship to strangers in SL anymore. You see, I'm a teacher, and when I teach stuff, I want the message to stick.

[Kathlen Onyx]

9 minutes ago, Arduenn Schwartzman said:

Assuming you mean a complete stranger you only had a five-minute conversation with: none. I'll take the offer immediately.

And then I will IM them every day about trivial matters, ask them about their real life incessantly (eventually whether they have a bank account) and offer them teleports to everywhere I go (Cannibal Island, The Carnival of Rubbery Rides, etc.) and ask them to 'come sit on this funny-looking couch with me' and propose to meet in real life until they decide to unfriend me themselves and learn to never randomly offer friendship to strangers in SL anymore. You see, I'm a teacher, and when I teach stuff, I want the message to stick.

LMFAO! I've been bored lately and this seems like a very fun activity indeed! I'm just going to start acting weird. HAHA!

[Leahndra]

Bad choices for me are

"hi, how are you"

Months old empty profiles

A profile filled with sex groups, even worse kink/bdsm groups

Tabs full of "what a TRUE master/sub 'actually' IS

Group titles worn which state "I'm a sub/master" 

Them trying to be overly nice in my IMs 

 

My FL is very empty 

 

 

 

 

[ValKalAstra]

Aside from a general gut feeling and the overall vibe of a profile, there are some crimson red flags that see me politely walk away.

1. "I don't like Drama!" - Maybe prejudice but every person I have met so far, that felt the need to point out they hated Drama was usually the source or center of it.

2. They insult or put others or something down in their first few lines. Some do bond over their shared disdain - hey more luck to them. For me, I feel like that energy doesn't really blend well with me.

3. Dirty Laundry in their picks. Literally and metaphorically. Like seriously someone had a picture of dirty laundry in there. Others have got an entire blogpost about their ex or whomever in there. I run in both cases.

[Nick0678]

I am a polite person so i accept everyone, even those randoms who send friend requests out of nowhere. Then i add them to the proper Contact Set,.

(At the end of every year i usually delete them all except those that we talk on a daily basis and start fresh.)

 

[Kathlen Onyx]

Since I have it turned off I don't have to accept any friend. I simply have this as a response to a friend request. 

I don't accept friend requests unless you are actually a friend first. Thank you for your understanding.

As I don't get a pop up when someone requests it the only way I would know is if they IM'd me.  Most people if I talk to them ask. I normally just say I keep my friends list to very close friends and family.

[ChinRey]

5 hours ago, Arduenn Schwartzman said:

Assuming you mean a complete stranger you only had a five-minute conversation with: none. I'll take the offer immediately.

A five minute conversation? That's actually quite a lot. It's not at all unusual for strangers to fire off a friendship request without even saying hello first.

[Sid Nagy]

Accepting a friend request is easy.
Deleting someone from a friends list again is easy too.

So I always accept friend requests and see what happens.
No big deal.

Becoming a real friend is not the same as being on the list.

[SynesthetiQ]

I'm 2 months old, I have an empty profile, and I'm wandering around in a system avatar.

This friends thing you speak of, what exactly is that?

[Janet Voxel]

I’m with everybody else, that act in itself is a red flag. It’s not just a red flag for the general weirdness that usually follows. If it’s not weirdness, then they’re spamming some club or trying to sell something.

[Maitimo]

12 hours ago, Bree Giffen said:

An avatar walks up to you and wants to be your friend. What signs do you look for to decide if they are a good or bad choice?

1) They are a person I have seen on multiple occasions before, and I have chatted with them in local, or observed their chat in local, sufficiently to have an idea of what their personality is like.

2) I have had an in-depth conversation with them that I found interesting and informative.

#2 is kinda optional, but #1 is non-negotiable. I am not gonna friend up with someone I have never seen or spoken to before, not under any circumstances.

 

23 minutes ago, Sid Nagy said:

Accepting a friend request is easy.
Deleting someone from a friends list again is easy too.

So I always accept friend requests and see what happens.
No big deal.

Becoming a real friend is not the same as being on the list.

Speaking from experience of both, its not a big deal when your avatar is male. If your avatar is (or appears to be) female, then its an entirely different matter. There are few things more annoying than getting "hi how r u"  the moment you log in from desperate guys looking for a booty call.

 

[Krystina Ferraris]

I never friend on first chat so no issues there. Sometimes I get talking to someone and we click immediately, well in that case sure we’ll mutually friend.

either way, even if you friend someone and change your mind what’s the big deal? At least for me nothing to lose as I don’t slex or have full emotional involvement so if it doesn’t work out no biggie.

[Ceka Cianci]

If someone pops up and in the first few lines throws out a friend request, I just act like I don't see the thing.

I figure they are probably used to facebook or something where they get a zillion friends like they are after likes on youtube..

If someone asks if we could be friends and we've been talking for a bit, more than likely I'll friend them, because we wouldn't have been talking that long if we didn't get along or if I got creeped out..

I'm not very picky, and do like to talk to people.. But at the same time, I don't like those IM's the moment I come on.. Most of the time I just don't answer them. A big reason is to see if I get spammed, but also, give a person a bit to get settled in before IMing..