If someone IMs you...

[blissfulbreeze]

If someone IMs you in SL, do you:

Cam on them first to see if you want to reply

Cam and read their profile first

Totally ignore without further action 

IM them back without camming or seeing profile

 

Also, do you enjoy random civil IMs?

 

 

 

 

[blissfulbreeze]

I usually cam and read profile first. However, I'm trying to be less judgemental and have found some good conversations with people that I may have ignored in the past.

I do enjoy random IMs at times as long as I don't get multiple at the same time. It's too overwhelming to multitask.

 

Edited August 10, 2022 by blissfulbreeze

[Alwin Alcott]

5 minutes ago, blissfulbreeze said:

If someone IMs you in SL, do you:

Cam on them first to see if you want to reply

Cam and read their profile first

Totally ignore without further action 

IM them back without camming or seeing profile

 

Also, do you enjoy random civil IMs?

Depends .. if they are on the same region i cam and read the profile, If they are not around, just the profile.
If i reply .. depends on the profile and words send.

Random civil IM's are welcome, but in a social setting as clubs or the more social events, not just during shopping or jumping around visiting places, most IM's in that case  "want" something.
 

[Nadia Chatterbox]

8 minutes ago, blissfulbreeze said:

If someone IMs you in SL, do you:

Cam on them first to see if you want to reply - cam to them, but rarely will the appearance affect my decision

Cam and read their profile first -  usually, but again - the appearance doesn't make my decision

Totally ignore without further action - depends on their approach/my mood

IM them back without camming or seeing profile rarely if ever

 

Also, do you enjoy random civil IMs? as long as they're respectful

 

 

 

 

 

[Rick Nightingale]

Assuming the IM is something worth answering, I'll usually answer and then read/cam out of curiosity while waiting for a response.

I rarely ignore an IM unless it's clearly objectionable and sometimes than I play with them for a laugh.

I've no objection to random IMs as long as they are interesting, or at least not just begging for something.

Edited August 10, 2022 by Rick Daylight

[Rowan Amore]

Always profile first.  Then, depending on what the IM is about, I might cam.  If it's a question or comment about something I'm wearing or my appearance in any way, I usually don't bother looking unless they continue the conversation after my response.

[Love Zhaoying]

4 minutes ago, Rowan Amore said:

Always profile first.  Then, depending on what the IM is about, I might cam.  If it's a question or comment about something I'm wearing or my appearance in any way, I usually don't bother looking unless they continue the conversation after my response.

That sounds better than my first reflex reaction when I get a random IM, which is to smash my computer, move to another state, and live in the woods off of berries and mushrooms.

[Lindal Kidd]

1 minute ago, Love Zhaoying said:

That sounds better than my first reflex reaction when I get a random IM, which is to smash my computer, move to another state, and live in the woods off of berries and mushrooms.

...sends Love a random IM and sits back to watch the fun.

[Katherine Heartsong]

I actually read the profile before camming.

Then, if it's an invite to dance (ahem, deep breaths, calm down, you're not in-world right now) I cam and check the guy out. Being SL's most inflexibly stupid silly height snob, this is the next drop off point in the IM funnel. Then if we're all good, I message back and away we go. Nice chatting, conversation, sometimes flirting (what? I am a redhead after all!) etc. Then I ask if they've read my profile ... and the wheels fall off.

Edited August 11, 2022 by Katherine Heartsong

[Coffee Pancake]

26 minutes ago, Alwin Alcott said:

but in a social setting as clubs or the more social events, not just during shopping or jumping around visiting places, most IM's in that case  "want" something.
 

No they do not !!! Or at least if they do they refuse to tell me what it is and then get aggressive.

 

[Madelaine McMasters]

Though I don't often have time for a good chat, I do welcome random civil IMs. How I approach them depends on the IM and the context.

Curiously, the most common topic for random IMs has been Dr. Richard Feynman, who's last name appears in my profile. It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling to know that an appreciation of Feynman can get people to break the ice with him.

[Ayashe Ninetails]

On the rare chance I get IMs, I respond to everything, unless it's an offline message sent forever ago delivered upon login that simply says "hi." I always forget to check profiles or cam as I'm always in the middle of something (shopping, building, zoomed into my face, or lost in my inventory, usually), but if the person seems interesting enough and the convo lasts more than a few minutes, I'll take a peek eventually.

[Jackson Redstar]

Mine are almost client related, but brings me the IM etiquette - if you are IMing about a product or service (in my case service) in is nice to state the date AND time of the service reuest and a general message of what you are requiring, For me it usually goes like this:

I want to see if you can video my wedding

resond back, they are off line of course:

What is the date and time you are looking at

several hours later or the next day

it would be on August 30

Resond back they are off line of course

OK, what time SLT would that be? 

by now often 2 or 3 days have passsed just to get a date and a time! LOL

ok, rant over 

[Da5id Weatherwax]

cast an eye over the IM. Has it caught my interest? Somebody talking about music or about the project they can see me working on usually will, most other polite messages have a reasonable chance of doing. A "Hey, check out .... " or anything crass will not.

That usually gets a reply. If the conversation continues, whether or not I cut it short will depend on both its content and the profile/presentation of the person I'm talking to.

Case in point. Working on my house/workshop build I get "Hi - are you building that?"
My reply "Yep, but it's nowhere near done yet."

Sadly, my visitor was not actually interested in the build.

Av lands right next to me in my personal space with a "Fancy taking a break?" He's naked, complete with boner. This is Zindra after all. It does, however, save me the time of checking his profile
"LOL, not going to happen. Firstly I'm straight, second I'm not up for a casual hookup right now." and I get back to working on the build.

Visitor backs off out of my personal space, thus avoiding being promptly ejected from the land. Continues to try and flirt but not so obnoxiously he's annoying and is politely but firmly rebuffed every time. Takes the hint and moves off of his own volition before he becomes annoying.

[Kimmi Zehetbauer]

Unless I know the person I'll ignore them. Sometimes it's some dude who wants cyber or to scam.  

Long ago I had a fake Linden PM me once about an issue with the account and needed credentials. Told the bloke sorry can't do that. Also told him that if he was a real Linden staff he would have "Linden Lab Employee" instead of "Resident" in the famous Account box and the name wouldn't be "SampleFakeLinden Resident" AND staff don't need that info as they can access it from the game's back-end. I ARed him and blocked him.

[Spiffy Voxel]

17 minutes ago, Da5id Weatherwax said:

Av lands right next to me in my personal space with a "Fancy taking a break?" He's naked, complete with boner. This is Zindra after all. It does, however, save me the time of checking his profile

"LOL, not going to happen. Firstly I'm straight, second I'm not up for a casual hookup right now." and I get back to working on the build.

Visitor backs off out of my personal space, thus avoiding being promptly ejected from the land. Continues to try and flirt but not so obnoxiously he's annoying and is politely but firmly rebuffed every time. Takes the hint and moves off of his own volition before he becomes annoying.

I've had a naked person show up on my land while I was there. (No boner, thankfully). Was civil and moved along, but expressed surprise that people kept ejecting him from their parcels. I suspect he was mainly out for the lulz. 🤷

[Spiffy Voxel]

Polite IM will usually get a response from me unless I'm busy. Rude or plain WTF messages get ignored, and repeat offences get that person blocked.

I get lots of nice compliments about my avatar, which always make me smile. Thankfully, being a) non-human, b) bigger than most folks means I don't get hit on much these days, though it happens occasionally...

[Janet Voxel]

I cam them and look at their profile first. If it’s a crazy profile or a 4chan meme for a profile pic or something I might ignore. 70% of the time I will still respond, because you never know. Mostly my instinct is right though. So I just end up with a strange interaction that may end up in them getting ignored or blocked. I usually respond, sometimes it turns out that I’m the one doing the trolling.

[Persephone Emerald]

Once I see their IM (which might take a while since I'm often doing something besides looking at chat), I'll say Hi back. Then I look to see if they're nearby and cam on them. Then I check their profile to get a read on them. If they're not near me, I check their groups to see if they're in a group I may have chatted in recently. I'm still being polite at this point, but I start getting irritated if I don't know why this person is IMing me.

[Bree Giffen]

I just respond. I have avatar names turned off so it's often too hard to put a name to an avatar. Sometimes they will compliment me and I have no idea where they are and I just say they look good too. 

[Ceka Cianci]

The first thing before anything is, I go right for the profile tab and read the profile, like it's second nature.. It's a good chance that if I'm at a beach and been there for awhile, I've already read them all.. Because one of the first things I do is click the peoples tab and start going down the list, because I love reading profiles and who's in the sim with me..

Honestly, If the About Me section is filled with things like, How everyone else can be a better person and some sort of way everyone else can achieve that and  not a word about themselves.. I just close it and go back to listening to music. I won't even make it to the pic section..

Just about anyone else I'll answer for the most part.. I love a good random IM if I'm not in the middle of something. I don't care how new or old they are to SL or if they have a blank or full profile..  I have my red flags to avoid the dramas, like anyone else..

As far as camming others.. About the only time  would probably be at a beach when I have tons of time to be doing that. But most of the time It's aimed at the water while I'm sorting inventory or something..

 

[Seicher Rae]

4 hours ago, blissfulbreeze said:

If someone IMs you in SL, do you:

Cam on them first to see if you want to reply

Cam and read their profile first

Totally ignore without further action 

IM them back without camming or seeing profile

 

Also, do you enjoy random civil IMs?

To answer the last part first: I absolutely enjoy random civil IMs. I have been known to randomly IM people, but only because I've either read their profile and saw something I liked (only when I like something) or their avatar is so amazing I just want to compliment them (rarely done but it does happen) both usually delivered with the disclaimer, "I'm not hitting on you!" sigh. The uncivil ones can be enjoyable too, depending on what they are. Really stupid, clumsy attempts at picking me up can be quite fun to bat away.

50% of the random IMs I get are of the "Hi" ilk. Just "hi." In that case I generally just type, "hi" and then look at their profile. If that then gets me "be my friend???" I will either say nothing as I decline it, or tell them, "Thanks, but I don't friend people I don't know." Depends on how much wine what kind of mood I'm in. It also depends on what I'm doing.

A nice chat, I will look at their profile. There's a very good chance I won't even cam them, at all. I'm much more likely to be chatty with someone with a full, interesting profile than I am a blank one, but even with a blank one I'll chat and respond according to what they say to me. I've just found with blank profiles I'm more likely to get some kind of stupid more than I am with someone with a full profile. Not always, and people with full profiles have been known to be all kinds of stupid, too. (And ironically, my profile recently got wiped out due to one of my moods and is fairly empty... I can do teh stupids now too!)

I'm such an introvert though that even the people on my friends list rarely IM me.

ETA: When I had a computer that allowed me to take the photos I wanted, it would take a nuclear reaction for me to see random, unexpected IMs. I was too focused. And anything in local? ha! I'm totally clueless 99% of the time.

Edited August 10, 2022 by Seicher Rae
punctuation n stuff

[Seicher Rae]

1 hour ago, Da5id Weatherwax said:

second I'm not up for a casual hookup right now."

But later, yeah? 


:::looks innocent:::

[Stephanie Misfit]

I always read their profile and cam them before deciding how I will respond. If they have an empty profile, my response to their IM is often, "Why do you have an empty profile?". 

I don't mind random civil IMs most days. It's just that most random IMs are not that at all, they are dudes wanting to hook up.

[Da5id Weatherwax]

18 minutes ago, Seicher Rae said:

But later, yeah? 


:::looks innocent:::

You offering?

If so you'll have to wait until I at least get the bedroom finished and furnished (or the room behind the secret door in the wine cellar if you're into that stuff)