How are you feeling today?

[roseelvira]

sometimes a hug says more than a million words ,,,,, as the tears flow  and you fight to keep above the pain that wants to take your very breath and soul.

[Cindy Evanier]

For the record if I like your post in this thread  (and there are some I have missed but thats more the brain fog than indifference) its not that I like the bad things you are feeling.  It is in replacement of having any other reaction to show I get it.  I care.  I would give a hug too like @Seicher Rae.  There is no I feel crapper than your crap thing going on  (can I say ***** here?) but also I can so without hearts and flowers from people who have not bothered to join in and share their struggles at this time of year.   I found this the other day.  I was going use it for my profile Icon thing but I am putting it here instead.

[Seicher Rae]

 

Eff it.

Edited December 14, 2019 by Seicher Rae
deleted actual feelings because you can't delete posts

[Cindy Evanier]

24 minutes ago, Seicher Rae said:

 

Eff it.

I wish we had a reaction for that too

[roseelvira]

 ........

Edited December 14, 2019 by roseelvira
not good at writing expressing ,

[Pamela Galli]

:

1.This is indeed a very good forum. I don’t like people barging in here, usually wanting some kind of help, and flinging unprovoked gratuitous insults. 

2. Michelle Goldberg writes in the NYTimes Opinions about Democracy Grief. I have that.  It’s not academic — people, children,  are suffering and dying. The Constitution is being nullified. The three branches are being dismantled. I could look away, but someone has to look, and I am in a position to, so I will. 

Goldberg also talks about Epistemological Nihilism, which contributes greatly to my Democracy Grief, since Democracy depends to some extent on a shared, agreed upon set of facts, rather than parallel universes. 

Condolences to the U.K. —  this election is just devastating. 
 

 

 

[Selene Gregoire]

1 hour ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

How am I feeling? 

Welp, my mom died a year and a half ago, Christmas and Thanksgiving we here favorite holidays, I grew up learning to cook from her after my dad left when i was 3. We would cook ourselves a small dinner and watch a movie every Sunday. She remarried and my new dad turned out to be the best father i could ever want. He taught me what being a dad meant, sort of.. He worked 60+ hours a week and had little time for myself and my half sister. So i decided that if i ever had kids i would spend as much time with them as possible.Which i did. Christmas was always about the kids, myself and sister when we were young and then my kids when i had them. She loved making people happy, and i kind of naturally inherited that. I enjoy nothing more than making someone happy. Hell, i do it in SL. I give away more clothing than i sell, simply because thats how i am. 

The holidays suck without her here. I have to be the rock in my family as my dad and sis are copper to the core. Bright and shiny, nice to look at but weak on the inside. I'm tired of being strong. 3 years of mom being sick, then a year and a half of my dad and sis saying how much they miss her and how they cry at the drop of a hat.. Everything at this time of the year makes me want to cry.. Every song, every movie.

My mother planned a trip to the Polar Express in NH when my kids were 2 and 4.. We had our own motel room with my kids, Mom dad and sis next door, Aunt and gran in the room on the other side. Big dinner at a nice rustic restaurant then a surprise train ride for us all on the Polar Express to the North Pole. We walked through the snow to a huge building where about a hundred people waited while a young  lad read the story to us all. When Santa walked out my youngest wiggled free of me and ran full tilt into Santa screaming his name. He picked her up and gave her a hug. All the kids had name tags on and he said "Hello, ****." She freaked out. I went down and collected her, he gave her another hug and one for her sis who was with me. We all got a silver bell on a chain as we left. I still have them. I will always have them. And i will always cry when i hear Believe by Josh Groban. My mom did stuff like this all the time. Call us up out of the blue and say to pack a lunch we were heading to the Aquarium/Museum of Science/4H fair/Apple picking/whatever. 

So yeah, I am not in a good place, to top it off i had to have a molar pulled and apparently i have rheumatoid arthritis in my hip and its raining..  Gonna curl up and watch The muppet Christmas Carol with my youngest as she still believes in the Christmas spirit like me. Her sis is a grump...

Merry Christmas.. 

 

 

 

[Pamela Galli]

Polar Express is one of those children’s books I can’t read all the way through, esp aloud. I get to the part about the little bell and 1) first get too choked up to read , then 2) start laughing at myself getting too choked up to read. Which puzzles any children who might be present.

(Also cannot read Roxaboxen or Velveteen Rabbit. And then there is the biggest tearjerker ever written, Love You Forever.)
 

 

[roseelvira]

...

Edited December 14, 2019 by roseelvira
sad

[Cindy Evanier]

2 hours ago, roseelvira said:

 ........

look how many likes you got before your edit.  Your post was great and its a shame you removed it

Edited December 14, 2019 by Cindy Evanier
typo

[Beth Macbain]

Okay... well... I see things went a little off the rails while I was sleeping. 

Kindly stop that. This is a thread for people to feel their not-so-great feelings during a really rough time of year without being mocked or derided. Politics is important. It affects real lives in sometimes devastating ways. Something tragic happened in the UK this week. People are justifiably upset and scared. I want them to be free to talk about their feelings here during this dark month. 

I have no mod powers, but I'm imploring you all to keep the bickering and fighting OFF this particular thread. We are stressed. We are struggling to get through until, at the very least, January. 

Please let us have this one place to commiserate without being judged. We are going through a variety of things related to depression, mourning, health, stress, anger, sadness, etc., and we're making a very good attempt to help each other out. 

So after a really great night of sleep where I dreamed about Harry Styles, I woke up, open the forum, and now I'm feeling angry and sad. 

[Garnet Psaltery]

56 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said:

So after a really great night of sleep where I dreamed about Harry Styles, I woke up, open the forum, and now I'm feeling angry and sad. 

I'm sorry, Beth and all who are suffering, for adding to the woes.

[Beth Macbain]

3 minutes ago, Garnet Psaltery said:

I'm sorry, Beth and all who are suffering, for adding to the woes.

No need for an apology. I, too, take politics deadly seriously and understand the possible repercussions of electing dangerous people with dangerous results. I'm devastated, too, for what happened in your country. 

[Beth Macbain]

To add insult to injury, I just ruined a giant pot of homemade Mac and cheese that I’ve been really looking forward to snarfing down.

December really does ruin everything.

[LexxiXhan]

3 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said:

December really does ruin everything.

I blame the Romans.

I kinda overcooked too x

[Rolig Loon]

26 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said:

To add insult to injury, I just ruined a giant pot of homemade Mac and cheese that I’ve been really looking forward to snarfing down.

I cured myself of Mac & Cheese by overdosing on it during my student days a long time ago, and don't care to go back.  As I recall, though, it's really hard stuff to ruin unless you leave the pot on the stove and forget it while you take a nap (which I did once).  🙄

[Beth Macbain]

25 minutes ago, Rolig Loon said:

I cured myself of Mac & Cheese by overdosing on it during my student days a long time ago, and don't care to go back.  As I recall, though, it's really hard stuff to ruin unless you leave the pot on the stove and forget it while you take a nap (which I did once).  🙄

I was attempting to make it in the Instant Pot. Overcooked pasta and stringy cheese. 😪😪😪

[karynmaria]

On 12/13/2019 at 7:52 AM, Beth Macbain said:

There is a reason that 12 step programs use the "one day at a time" mantra. Things get overwhelming when we look at things in a very big or broad way. Small bites. Baby steps. One day at a time. They sound like platitudes but they're true. 

Just look at today and focus on getting from Point A to Point B. Tomorrow you can work on Point B to Point C. 

hugs

I'm an alcoholic and that is definately my 1st mantra.   It has kept me sober for 8 years, I take each day as it comes, I'll worry about tomorrow when it gets here.  I also use that mantra for other things as well, you made a great point with that one .  Some days for me  are harder than others, but it certainly has gotten me thru really some really bad times.     I have to keep it my mantra cause sometimes, even now,  I really want to drink.  And the Christmas holidays for some reason always brings that drinking feeling out more so than any time of the year. 

Also want to extend hugs to everyone here that is having a hard time, I am so sorry for your losses and your struggles and I am happy for your small victories.   I think this thread is a great idea who knows how your own posts might help someone who is just reading this and seeing that they have the same story as us.  It does bring comfort to know that one is not alone.

[Beth Macbain]

4 minutes ago, karynmaria said:

I have to keep it my mantra cause sometimes, even now,  I really want to drink.

You got this. It’s just a nasty liquid that makes you feel like garbage. You are stronger than it is.

You got 8 years. One more day is just a grain of sand, but you’ve built a mountain of awesome from those tiny grains. Keep building!

big hugs

[Sukubia Scarmon]

I only ever tried to make mac and cheese once. Cheese won't really melt for me, no matter what I do, so I gave up on that. Am supposed to cut down on the dairy anyway since I drink way too much milk. my coffee is basically white.

Yeah, well, my thursday and friday have been really, REALLY *****ty due to some incidents that happened. And I feel very lonely. I mean, don't get me wrong, I got friends, I got a boyfriend, by all accounts I am not alone and should be happy. But I miss my best friend. Or ex-best friend. You know, that was the one person that 95% got me. I don't know what's wrong with me, but rarely people are really on my wavelenght. My boyfriend is naturally closer. my RL friends certainly aren't. They're good people and I like them, we have fun, but we don't really share much. My best friend and I shared almost all hobbies - I even introduced them to SL, and we did all our shenanigans together. Hell, that was the one person that knows me in RL that knew I did erp. We had mostly the same tastes. 
But... well, we where not the same person, so there where differences. Basicially - they prefered drinking, and roleplay with enabling,  selfish people over me and getting help for their issues. I never heard from them again, but I miss them every day. And sometimes, like now, it's really bad. Bad enough for me to actually go and look her up in wow, see what she's up to. And i realize, that she never missed me.

[Orwar]

   I'd like to know, how come I wake up before my morning alarm goes off on a Sunday, but can easily snooze until lunch time on any other weekday. I'm terrible in the mornings, I'm hardly functioning until lunch since I have no appetite at all when I wake up, and need to caffeinate and nicotinate myself for a few hours before I'm any good.

   I've never tried the American style mac and cheese. I'm a little terrified of the thing that comes out of the boxed, pre-made stuff I've seen. But, there's a dish that's very popular in Sweden (often brought up as one of the favourite dishes served in Swedish schools by students of all generations), that I think might be similar - and, of course, there's a luxurious Orwarian version of it, simple yet delicious:

   Ingredients:

• Pasta. Usually Fusilli.
• A bit of regular, plain, wheat flour.
• A bit of butter - yes, real butter. (Duh)
• Milk. Cold milk.
• Salt, black pepper, nutmeg, white pepper - freshly ground spices, always.
• Cheese (details further on).
• Ham (also, details further on).

   How to:

• First of all, set a big pot of water, well-salted, on the stove. This dish is really quick and easy to make, so you'll want the pasta boiling ASAP.
• In a pot on medium-high, put some butter and let it smelt.
• Add flour to the butter and whisk it until you have something that looks a bit like pie dough.
  Whilst I refuse to say how much of anything to use, as cooking and rocket science should be kept apart, the ratio of flour to butter is roughly 1:1 by volume - or 10:6 butter to flour, by weight. What you're doing here is a basic roux - if you are eligible to be in Second Life, i.e. 16+, you should know what a roux is.
• Cook the roux until the raw flour flavour is gone - or until it smells like baked pie crust.
• At this point, add the milk. And remember Chef John's roux mantra - hot roux + cold milk = no lumps.
• Heat it up, and as it does it will thicken - how much it will thicken depends on your roux to milk ratio. You now have a basic white sauce, or Béchamel sauce.
  Once it reaches a simmer, it will have thickened to how much it will thicken to; this will change slightly as we add the cheese in, but if you feel at this stage as if it's too thick, add more milk and make a double batch (trust me, having leftovers of this in the fridge is not a bad thing!). If it's too thin, well, either make more roux in a separate pan, or just thicken it by putting a little bit of flour and milk in a shaker and shake like you were paid to shake, and then add it to the sauce - but remember, if you add flour, you'll need to let it simmer for at least 4 minutes from that point on - and remember, what you've got here is milk in a pot, you do NOT want to burn it.
• This is a good time to add your nutmeg, white pepper and black pepper, and a little salt - but don't over-salt it, and don't put the salt away just yet, as you may well want to adjust the saltiness after you've added the cheese and, more importantly, the salted, smoked ham.

 

• Grate your cheese. Now, let's talk cheese for a moment. In Sweden, your 3 'standard' cheeses (that are Swedish - I mean obviously we've got cheddar, edam, and all the other usual suspects). These are: Herrgårdsost, Grevéost and Prästost. Were you in Sweden, you're probably use Prästost, which has a very strong 'cheese' flavor, and a high fat content, which makes it excellent for sauces and casseroles, or for topping hamburgers and such. Whilst I'm partial to Grevéost, myself, I've found that in this particular dish, the 'nutty' flavour of it is a bit overwhelming. So when you select your cheese, pick one that tastes a lot of cheese, but not too much of anything else.
• Dice your ham. Now, if all you've got is regular boiled or smoked ham, that's fine. But what you'd probably use in Sweden is kassler. What is kassler? It's de-boned cuts of ham, that have been cured and smoked, wrapped up in a little net to create what we sometimes call "a poor man's fillet". It's absolutely excellent.
• Add your cheese and ham to the sauce, and stir it until your cheese has completely smelted. At this point, make sure to taste for seasoning (I generally salt very gently before this point, as kassler adds a lot of salt - and the cheese adds some, too!).

   Easy as ost- och skinksås. Apart from serving this in schools, it's usually also one of the first dishes you're taught to cook in Swedish schools (once they dare let you near the stove, that is).

[Maitimo]

@Drake1 Nightfire You have some beautiful memories to cherish there. I am so sorry for the loss of your mum. (*offers hugs*)

[Garnet Psaltery]

How are you today, @Matty Luminos?

[Maitimo]

51 minutes ago, Garnet Psaltery said:

How are you today, @Matty Luminos?

Well, it's still early here and I've only been up a little over hour, just started my second cup of Yorkshire Tea, so it's going pretty good so far. I'm spending the day alone; my partner is up in Scotland for the day with a sporting event, and I'm considering going to my local pub for a proper Sunday lunch because I can't cook anything like that on my own.  

[Garnet Psaltery]