LexxiXhan

*makes notes*

*sashays past and sighs wistfully..*

Send them a sincere apology, and intro, in French. Then accept their decision.

Something you could try: when I first found out that my regular GP was only going to help with my MH issues if he thought i was an immediate danger to myself or the public (ie if he or the surgery was in danger of being held accountable), I used a local Facebook page "What's happening in Lexxitown" that allows you to have an anonymous question posted - I got lots of responses, empathy and encouragement, including recommendations for all the local GPs who'd been helpful and supportive to the responders or their family members. I requested my next appointment to be with a particular GP (had to wait a little longer as he was popular!) and had a much better experience.

Roger Eno - 'Fleeting Smile'. Apparently featured in a movie I've never seen called 'The Jacket'. #SaturdayMood https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTAzo9zjhUk

A bloke called Will on the interwebs. So wrong. So very, very wrong.

@Cindy Evanier - I'm so sorry. It must have been so hard keeping that to yourself! And now reality has been so cruel to you. All the hugs you need, and more xx

I know that sense of dread and uncertainty only too well. Extra hugs from me xx

At a loose end. My 'Shamanic Harmony Chanting' workshop was cancelled this evening, so I bought wine and eggs for breakfast tomorrow (the eggs, not the wine, which is for tonight!). I'm now torn between watching the tv series I'm into at the moment or finding somewhere to dance and chat inworld. It's kinda nice to have such superficial decisions to make ignore.

crying again 😂 xx

Just relief and lightness for me at the moment 🖤 While starting my new job has been great, they don't pay me until this weekend, and I was left with £5.44 to feed and entertain my kids over the half-term break. I solved that by setting up a Ko-Fi crowdfunder with the provision that any money I received will be rounded UP to the nearest £10 and then donated to Mermaids UK (a charity supporting trans and gender-non-conforming children) when my pay comes in. There were enough donations to cover my cash-flow dilemma and I've since decided to double the total when I donate to Mermaids. I was still left with the problem of not being able to cover my rent and bills this month due to the costs involved in getting interviewed and updating my certification etc to work with vulnerable people. Since I escaped a very toxic relationship situation back in August I've been living on about £600 a month plus whatever I could raise by doing every trick I could and jumping through every hoop available, not always eating, while fighting off depression and ideation and being haunted by my brother's suicide and my own previous decision which I've been battling with for six years. I didn't think I was going to make it this time. Last night, I reviewed all my income and expenses. It still wasn't quite enough, but agonisingly close at the same time. Then I had a phone call from someone I didn't speak to for 20 years, promising just enough of a top-up to get me through. When I realised I was going to be ok I just broke down and sobbed, hot rolling tears, until my youngest daughter came and shared the most amazing, loving hug with me xx I'm going to be ok. And for a while, it seems.

Aye.