How can a woman trust her man enough to bring him to a store for women (and vice versa)

[Lindal Kidd]

2 hours ago, Arielle Popstar said:

Explains maybe why a girl was dragging her boyfriend through the Doll event by a leash, even though she didn't look to be the domme type. Guess she was making sure everyone knew he was with her

I figured it's like @Madelaine McMasterssays...shopping is torture. So she takes him shopping to punish him. Probably for IM'ing other girls.

[Arduenn Schwartzman]

Me, IMming any random, sexy-looking woman when my partner takes me out shopping...

[Ayeleeon]

It is a pretty common sight in RL malls to see guys standing around holding their partner's purse. And while purses aren't needed in SL, I have thought about getting one, that I could carry around as I follow my girlfriend as she shops. It would be kinda cute I think.

[Myntz Mysterious]

4 minutes ago, Ayeleeon said:

It is a pretty common sight in RL malls to see guys standing around holding their partner's purse. And while purses aren't needed in SL, I have thought about getting one, that I could carry around as I follow my girlfriend as she shops. It would be kinda cute I think.

Someone get this man this:

STAT! 😁

[Dafadilia Wayfarer]

Grouping people altogether as if each person isn't an individual is foolish. Perhaps this has been your own personal experience with the men you've been with, but you can't assume that every other person on the grid has experienced this. I'm not trying to sound rude, but it just sounds like a very strange outlook. It's also an extremely rude assumption.

I go to stores and shopping events to...shop. My hubby goes with me to many shopping events and stores in sl. We both love to shop and my hubby has awesome taste. I love getting his feedback on items I'm interested in buying and he asks the same of me. In all the times we've gone shopping not once has it ever crossed my mind he is out on the prowl for other females. He goes with me to many places.  We go to many places individually. He goes to hang out at an old community he enjoys being part of that he knows I've no interest in because I'm very shy and don't like socializing in big crowds. He doesn't expect me to step out of my comfort zone and I don't expect him to give up hanging out with longtime friends because I'm not comfortable with crowds. I've been with Rand for three years. We met here in sl originally. We are partnered here. We are engaged and living together in rl now. I fully trust my hubby. He is my bestfriend. Plus, I'm just comfortable with who we are as a couple and as individuals.

I'm not saying that many experience what I do in their sl relationship by taking things to real life, but that doesn't mean that relationships solely based in sl can't be fulfilling, loving, understanding and filled with trust. It depends on the people in the relationship.

[Scylla Rhiadra]

21 minutes ago, Matilda Melune said:

Someone get this man this:

STAT! 😁

Can we get something like this that works for forum posters?

I can name one or two I'd like to see gagged.

[Cinnamon Mistwood]

"How can a woman trust her man enough to bring him to a store for women (and vice versa)"

I haven't ever thought of this.  Your partner isn't yours if you have to worry about straying and cheating.  If you have the goal of a monogamous relationship and your partner is happily polyamorous, then your issues are bigger than a paranoid shopping trip.  Heck, you are not even on the same relationship page.

I would ask why you were partnered with someone whose goals are so different.  Did you not talk to each other before partnering?  How is shopping different than going to a club or dance venue with lots of great looking avatars around?  If anyone is so scared they will lose their partner if they go out in public, then it is the wrong relationship.  My partner knows I dance with random people.  He is comfortable and confident enough to know that does not mean cheating.  He has the same freedom to meet people and have fun.  I don't feel the need to control his every outing and he doesn't control mine.  At the end of the day we are together and respect the fact that we have a life together, but also enjoy doing things apart.  I feel that is a mature way to look at a relationship.  Anyone that expected me to entertain them 24/7 is not in my life for long.

Are you seriously afraid to take your partner out in public?

[Maitimo]

1 hour ago, Ayeleeon said:

Nope, I have short hair and have been hit on by other guys. I am pretty sure it is because they like guys.

Do they call other guys "babe" and "doll"?

[Annie Nova]

5 hours ago, Chris Nova said:

Not all guys are like this though. Me and my girl go shopping all the time together. She let's me know if a guy is bugging her (it happens often when we go out lol), and I troll him. Badly. 

We have full trust in each other. And I think trust is a dying thing in and out of SL, sadly.

I totally agree with the bolded part. My partner and I have had long conversations about this and we trust each other completely. Lots of communication is the key to fully trusting someone. I am aware that a lot of cheating goes on in SL, but if you have the desire and the commitment it is possible to have a meaningful and long lasting relationship.

[Lewis Luminos]

1 hour ago, Solar Legion said:

I can safely say I have not ever been hit on at any sort of shop in Second Life - before expressing my Avatar with a more Femme appearance and after.

I can also state that I have never hit on anyone at a shop either.

I was "excuse me, Ma'am"ed once - years ago, RL - while in Dallas (my hair was almost down to my rear at the time).

I've been hit on by a woman exactly once in my entire 13 years on this account, and it was in a store - a hair store. About 11 years ago. (Been hit on exactly once by a man also, and that was in a gym. Unsurprised).

The lesson I take away from all of this is, if you are tired of being hit on, make an avatar that is a short, ginger-haired guy. You'll be left alone for years on end.

I do think that long-haired men are kinda hot though.  When I first started to transition in RL (female to male) I had to cut my long hair short in order to pass (Matti's comment about people judging gender by hair length applies strongly in RL too). I made a promise to myself that I would let it grow again once I was far enough into transition to have a beard and look unambiguously male. Unfortunately the male-pattern baldness genes I inherited said "No!" 

 

[LittleMe Jewell]

6 hours ago, Bree Giffen said:

It was consistent for every group they asked.

Because they don't show the guys that say something different.  The video was intended to show that biased outlook.

[Sammy Huntsman]

Not gonna lie, but this is a very discriminatory post. I mean women can be just as bad. I hate this whole all men are bad schtick. Can we stop painting men with this broad brush. And maybe realize that we are all individuals. And sure there are bad men and women out there. But that doesn't mean all of them are bad.

[Ayashe Ninetails]

7 minutes ago, Lewis Luminos said:

The lesson I take away from all of this is, if you are tired of being hit on, make an avatar that is a short, ginger-haired guy. You'll be left alone for years on end.

Or partially/mostly/fully shave your head (as a female avie). I swear, ever since I started wearing shaved hairstyles, men don't even notice my existence anymore, LOL. It's kind of nice sometimes.

 

21 minutes ago, Lewis Luminos said:

I do think that long-haired men are kinda hot though. 

Yes. Definitely. Absolutely. Mhm. Mmmmhmmmmm. Entirely agree. 100%. Yis. Yus. Yas.

[Silent Mistwalker]

2 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

Can we get something like this that works for forum posters?

I can name one or two I'd like to see gagged.

 

We're sorry. Please take them off. 

 

 

😋

[Persephone Emerald]

7 hours ago, Ingrid Ingersoll said:

Okay before this becomes an "omg those whores" thread, a lot of those ladies "dressed up like they're at a club, hitting on the guy" are guys. 

What! You mean guys pretend to be female in SL not just to hook up with lesbians, but also to hook up with presumably straight guys? 😆

[Sammy Huntsman]

1 minute ago, Persephone Emerald said:

What! You mean guys pretend to be female in SL not just to hook up with lesbians, but also to hook up with presumably straight guys? 😆

I mean again we are making presumptions and just assuming. Some of us use SL as a means to deal with gender dysphoria. Like me. I am transitioning. And have a female avatar to represent that.

[Persephone Emerald]

4 hours ago, Solar Legion said:

I can safely say I have not ever been hit on at any sort of shop in Second Life - before expressing my Avatar with a more Femme appearance and after.

I can also state that I have never hit on anyone at a shop either.

I was "excuse me, Ma'am"ed once - years ago, RL - while in Dallas (my hair was almost down to my rear at the time).

Maybe it's just me, but the only avatars who have hit on me in stores were submissive guys who asked me (very politely) if I wanted to be their Mistress. 

[Madelaine McMasters]

9 minutes ago, Persephone Emerald said:

Maybe it's just me, but the only avatars who have hit on me in stores were submissive guys who asked me (very politely) if I wanted to be their Mistress. 

I've had the same experience, though one did call me a "f-ing bltch" when I demurred.

[Scylla Rhiadra]

9 minutes ago, Persephone Emerald said:

Maybe it's just me, but the only avatars who have hit on me in stores were submissive guys who asked me (very politely) if I wanted to be their Mistress. 

There's a very nice house elf who lives, evidently, near my home sim. And about once a month, almost like clockwork, he IMs me to ask if he can serve me.

I keep throwing socks off my sky platform, but I guess I'm throwing them off the wrong side?

[Scylla Rhiadra]

Just now, Madelaine McMasters said:

I've had the same experience, though one did call me a "f-ing bltch" when I demurred.

I totally told him to watch his language!

[Madelaine McMasters]

Just now, Scylla Rhiadra said:

There's a very nice house elf who lives, evidently, near my home sim. And about once a month, almost like clockwork, he IMs me to ask if he can serve me.

I keep throwing socks off my sky platform, but I guess I'm throwing them off the wrong side?

Not the wrong side, the wrong fetish.

[Persephone Emerald]

21 minutes ago, Sammy Huntsman said:

I mean again we are making presumptions and just assuming. Some of us use SL as a means to deal with gender dysphoria. Like me. I am transitioning. And have a female avatar to represent that.

I didn't say anything about transfolk. I was joking about the common assumptions people have about catfishing in SL.

[Madelaine McMasters]

4 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

I can name one or two I'd like to see gagged.

...notes that most SL gags still allow emoting when engaged.

...sets you on fire.

[Sammy Huntsman]

7 minutes ago, Persephone Emerald said:

I didn't say anything about transfolk. I was joking about the common assumptions people have about catfishing in SL.

I am sorry, I couldn't tell intention through text.

[Persephone Emerald]

Just now, Sammy Huntsman said:

I am sorry, I couldn't tell intention through text.

That's the problem with text. Someone even thought I was serious on another thread when I said people who dress as demons in SL are being racist.  😄