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   Two men were walking home after a late night at the tavern, and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery to get back into the village quicker. About halfway through the cemetery, they are startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows. Trembling with fear, they press on, and find a scruffy-looking old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

   - "Good gracious, sir!" one of the men exclaim after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death - we thought you a ghost! What are you doing, working here so late at night?"

   - "Those fools!", the old man grumbled, "They misspelled my name!"

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A woman who plays cards once a month with a group of friends was concerned that she always woke her husband when she came home around 11:30.

One night she decided to try not to rouse him. She undressed in the living room and, purse over arm, tiptoed nude into the bedroom - only to find her husband sitting up in bed reading.

"Darn it woman!" he exclaimed. "Did you lose everything?"
 

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These are really good from Ray Stevens..

I'm really enjoying  his songs a lot.. He's so funny and so good at writing. I was in tears laughing at these two songs..

He's so good at putting words together and telling a story with such humor..

 

The Mississippi Squirrel Revival.... The one after is, The Red Hot Chili Cookoff..

 

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