Ted McGregor Posted October 11, 2021 Share Posted October 11, 2021 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roseelvira Posted October 12, 2021 Share Posted October 12, 2021 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akane Nacht Posted October 12, 2021 Share Posted October 12, 2021 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BjorJlen Posted October 12, 2021 Share Posted October 12, 2021 Peace (and giggles)... 1 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Mistwalker Posted October 14, 2021 Share Posted October 14, 2021 (edited) Edited October 14, 2021 by Silent Mistwalker 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orwar Posted October 14, 2021 Share Posted October 14, 2021 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roseelvira Posted October 16, 2021 Share Posted October 16, 2021 Found this one soooo funny I cannot shop at Costco anymore :-))))) Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, which weighs 191 lbs. I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had an elephant? So, because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your jacket pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to Pee on a Fire Hydrant and a car hit me, I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the World to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all your retired friends...it will be their laugh for the day! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaithLynnSayes Posted October 17, 2021 Share Posted October 17, 2021 Always keep this in mind: The greener grass on the other side of the fence may be due to a septic tank issue. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tailpa Posted October 19, 2021 Share Posted October 19, 2021 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lindal Kidd Posted October 20, 2021 Share Posted October 20, 2021 Didja? Huh? Didja dooit? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie Nova Posted October 20, 2021 Share Posted October 20, 2021 A man and woman were married for many years...whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout, "When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life! Neighbors feared him. The old man liked the fact that he was feared. Then one evening, he died when he was 98. After the burial, her neighbors, concerned for her safety, asked, "Aren't you afraid that he may indeed be able to dig his way out of the grave and haunt you for the rest of your life? The wife said, " Let him dig. I had him buried upside down...and I know he won't ask for directions. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orwar Posted October 20, 2021 Share Posted October 20, 2021 My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaithLynnSayes Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 Let me see your war face! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BjorJlen Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 Peace... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leahndra Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ceka Cianci Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 hehehehe 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orwar Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lindal Kidd Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 2 hours ago, Ceka Cianci said: hehehehe You're both wrong, it's an outcrop! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rolig Loon Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 (edited) 47 minutes ago, Lindal Kidd said: You're both wrong, it's an outcrop! I'm not so sure about that. An outcrop is generally an exposure of rock that is in place, as in a cliff face or a roadcut. That looks like a freestanding boulder, perhaps one that has rolled downhill or been plopped there by a glacier or a monster flood. Edited October 22, 2021 by Rolig Loon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaithLynnSayes Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 1 hour ago, Orwar said: Edgy, but i approve Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madelaine McMasters Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 16 minutes ago, Rolig Loon said: I'm not so sure about that. An outcrop is generally an exposure of rock that is in place, as in a cliff face or a roadcut. That looks like a freestanding boulder, perhaps one that has rolled downhill or been plopped there by a glacier or a monster flood. I vote for glacial erratic. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BjorJlen Posted October 22, 2021 Share Posted October 22, 2021 Peace... 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orwar Posted October 24, 2021 Share Posted October 24, 2021 Realtor: The market is terrible at the moment, I haven't managed to sell anything for weeks. How's business on your end? Undertaker: Well, the cemetery is really crowded - and people are dying to get in! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BjorJlen Posted October 24, 2021 Share Posted October 24, 2021 Peace... 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie Nova Posted October 25, 2021 Share Posted October 25, 2021 You know that you're a really boring person when someone steals your identity and then tries to give it back. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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