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When typing, do you use punctuation to express your emotion?


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I was going for a degree in Communications and the way I learned it is this way, albeit: a *very* simplified explanation:

There are (basically) three writing styles. Formal, Semi-formal, and casual. Formal is most often used in business and with unknown strangers; people you cannot see. For example, an instructional notecard. In business communicating with customers should usually be in a formal style, even if they are not.

Formal is with full proper grammar and full, correct punctuation, and rarely uses truncations or contractions; every word is spelled out entirely. 

Semi-formal is similar to formal, though a bit more relaxed. Full proper grammar is not necessarily a requirement and a few contractions are often used. Punctuation is always there. An example of when to use semi-formal may be business-to-customer or loose acquaintances, and so on.

Casual is what you use with well-known others, family, close friends, etc. Punctuation in writing is still a best practice, but in any live chat, it's not so necessary.

Then there is the annoying fourth type: Many millennials use it, mostly because they have grown on it though telephone texting, then use it when it isn't necessary and shouldn't be used. The primary example is the substitution of alphabet characters for actual words, 0.5 points if they at least capitalize those characters. We call this the "Simple education and lazy mind" style of writing. This description is especially fitting if this style is used in pre-written ext, such as an instructional notecard.

Edited by Alyona Su
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I type fast enough not to need sacrificing correct punctuation; it’s as much a question of habit as anything else. And if someone is that impatient, I’d gladly not talk to him or her at all.

 

Recently, someone told me in IM that ending phrases with a period made me sound blunter.

I resisted the temptation to demonstrate proper bluntness.

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I'm not going to change using correct punctuation at all times. I don't care what others think it makes me sound like. They're hearing what they want to hear, not what is reality. If you change your behavior to please someone else, you're doing it for all the wrong reasons. Change because you need to make the change to become a better person. That is the only legitimate reason.

Don't like it? Maybe you should go back to high school and retake the English I, English II, English III and English IV courses that you apparently failed to comprehend.

Or you can continue to be a twit while I move on.

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16 minutes ago, Selene Gregoire said:

If you change your behavior to please someone else, you're doing it for all the wrong reasons. Change because you need to make the change to become a better person. That is the only legitimate reason.

Fixed it for you.

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54 minutes ago, Lindal Kidd said:
57 minutes ago, Ren Toxx said:

Recently, someone told me in IM that ending phrases with a period made me sound blunter.

Somewhat to my dismay, when in chat or IM, it DOES.  I've taken to using more exclamation points or concluding smileys to avoid sounding glum.

I have rarely heard anything that makes less sense to me.

35 minutes ago, Selene Gregoire said:

I'm not going to change using correct punctuation at all times. I don't care what others think it makes me sound like. They're hearing what they want to hear, not what is reality. If you change your behavior to please someone else, you're doing it for all the wrong reasons. Change because you need to make the change to become a better person. That is the only legitimate reason.

Don't like it? Maybe you should go back to high school and retake the English I, English II, English III and English IV courses that you apparently failed to comprehend.

Or you can continue to be a twit while I move on.

Hooray (minus the charged overtones, but agreeing with the sentiment 100%).

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OK, maybe the way I put that made it sound as if I was changing my typing style to suit someone else.

Not so!

Yes, I did read somewhere that ending your sentence with a period in chat made you sound down, or disapproving, or blunt.  So, that made me look at my chat with a fresh eye.  And I concluded that yes, it could be seen that way.

So, I changed it up a little.  Not just because someone said I should, but because I felt that they were right, and in that particular context, a more upbeat style would put across my actual mood and meaning better.

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On 9/2/2019 at 10:29 AM, Alyona Su said:

Then there is the annoying fourth type: Many millennials use it, mostly because they have grown on it though telephone texting, then use it when it isn't necessary and shouldn't be used. The primary example is the substitution of alphabet characters for actual words, 0.5 points if they at least capitalize those characters. ...

That part I made green: seems the opposite to me. If they're going for sloth, it should be consistent and as lazy as possible in every way, lest a properly capitalized letter be confused with part of an abbreviation, say, or a ticker symbol.

To the topic: I can't claim control of my punctuation, having caught the semi-colon at an innocent age and having yet to recover.

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18 minutes ago, Qie Niangao said:

That part I made green: seems the opposite to me. If they're going for sloth, it should be consistent and as lazy as possible in every way, lest a properly capitalized letter be confused with part of an abbreviation, say, or a ticker symbol.

To the topic: I can't claim control of my punctuation, having caught the semi-colon at an innocent age and having yet to recover.

I figure it may take up so much brain power that the painful effort is worth at least a half-point up from zero. Or should it be going from -0.95 to 0? I suppose that would make more sense, huh?

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21 hours ago, Lindal Kidd said:

So, I changed it up a little.  Not just because someone said I should, but because I felt that they were right, and in that particular context, a more upbeat style would put across my actual mood and meaning better.

I agree, on general principles, with Selene's point about not changing your style of writing to suit someone else. Language, particularly in a context like SL, is one of the most important ways in which we communicate our identity to others (and, in a weird way, that includes RP, where one is using language to establish a character).

Except, except, except . . .

Language is also preeminently a form of communication, no? And because it's about conveying information -- about who we are, how we feel, and so on, as well as more purely practical information -- considering the audience, the people on the other end of the line, so to speak, is really really important. So too, for the same reasons, is context. Context, including medium and audience, means that we are likely to lend extra weight to particular elements of what we are communicating. In some instances, "how I feel" is going to be as, or maybe more important than the denotative content.

So, most obviously, I write differently here, in the forums, than I do in-world. AND I don't have only one style of writing here, either: I might be trying to make a point, or merely bantering, being funny or trying to establish the seriousness of something. Generally, when I speak here, I'm using a more formal diction and grammar (although that's not always the case), where in-world, in IM or open chat, my language is much more colloquial because I tend to write in imitation of how I hear myself speaking (which relates to Rolig's point about using commas to indicate oral pauses). There are places and contexts in which my writing can approach stream-of-consciousness. There are occasions where writing "yeah" rather than "yes" seems to better communicate something I'm trying to convey. And there are instances where grammar is more or less important, because the absence of good grammar or punctuation is another tool we use to say something on the level of connotation -- about our audience, about ourselves, about context, or about content.

So, I'm with Lindal here actually. I think I always "sound like me" -- but there are many "me"s, many very different contexts in which I write, and many different audiences with whom I am engaging. And it's merely good rhetorical practice to consider the impact of how one chooses to say something.

The rules of language are important, of course, because they help ensure clarity. But sometimes clarity is aided by departing from prescriptive employments of grammar, punctuation, diction, and so forth.

Language should be a paint brush, not a straight-jacket (and yes, I'm deliberately mixing metaphors. So there.)

Edited by Scylla Rhiadra
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Punctuation is one of the most important aspects of written English, and yet it is one that is taken the most lightly. It is, in fact, this feature of writing that gives meaning to the written words… much like pauses and changes in tones of the voice when speaking. An error in punctuation can convey a completely different meaning to the one that is intended.

For example:

Your book, John.

Your book, John?

Although the words are same here, the two sentences mean completely different things because of the period (or full stop) and the question mark.

The same goes here:

Don’t stop.

Don’t, stop.

The comma after the don’t has made all the difference in the meaning of the words.

Another example of how punctuation can change the meaning of a sentence:

He was bitten by a dog which hurt him.

He was bitten by a dog, which hurt him.

The first sentence means the dog hurt him. The second sentence means the bite hurts him. It’s the comma after the dog that has completely changed the meaning of the sentence.

A classic example that is generally given when teaching punctuation is the best that can be. It’s this –

Take the sentence A woman without her man is nothing. Now see the difference punctuation makes:

A woman, without her man, is nothing.

A woman: without her, man is nothing.

See how punctuation has made the same sentence mean two exactly opposite things?

It’s very important to know all the punctuation marks, their meanings, and when to use them in order to produce a good piece of writing – and more importantly, to convey the correct message.

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I definitely use punctuation to express emotion, in both RL and SL. I also liberally use emojis. It just makes textual conversations more lively, IMO. I have a RL friend who never uses anything other than a period when texting. As a result she always “sounds” displeased, like Lindal mentioned above.

Her: Where do you guys want to eat on Saturday?

Me: Names place with some info... it’s pub-like and shouldn’t be too busy.

Her: We’ve been.

Me: Does that sound ok?

Her: That’s fine.

She always sounds super unenthused about everything, but she’s lovely in person.

Give me an emoji or something! 

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1 hour ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

Language should be a paint brush, not a straight-jacket (and yes, I'm deliberately mixing metaphors. So there.)

Thank you for the reminder.  As an unrepentant academic, I confess that I will always prefer a long sentence where a short one would serve just as well.  I will use a more specific Latinate word rather than a terse Anglo-Saxon one.  I will use punctuation carefully and perhaps excessively to be sure that my writing carries the nuances that only punctuation can offer (especially in long sentences). 

When I was in high school centuries ago, the English teachers issued a punctuation handbook that terrorized all of us.  I do not remember how many pages long it was, but I do recall that it had over 50 rules for commas alone, each with at least one example of proper usage.  The English teachers meant business.  When our essay assignments were graded, the papers would come back with numbers, circled in red ink, in the margins.  We were meant to look up the number of each rule we had broken and to write it out longhand ten times. I recall breaking rule #27 often enough to fill several pages of lined paper. (" #27: Avoid excessive use of commas as a way for justifying run-on sentences" -- a rule that I break regularly to this day.)   That experience may have scarred me for life, but it taught me how to use punctuation properly -- and told me which rules I could stretch when I didn't think they served my purpose.

There are certainly times when the rules shouldn't apply, when they put your meaning in a straightjacket and make you sound like a pedant.  I fall into that trap too often.  At the same time, I try desperately to be as clear as I can when I write.  I don't like discovering that someone has misinterpreted something I meant simply because I was a clumsy writer.  The rules are important to me because they help me fill my end of the communication bargain that I have with whoever is reading. When I break them, I have failed, and we both lose. 

Like you, Scylla, I use a more relaxed style in chat than I do here.  I'm a slow, poor typist, so I use shorter sentences and more slang.  I rarely compromise on punctuation, though.  Those silly little marks are the road signs I use to signal nuances of meaning, mood, and my frequent changes of direction. They are important paintbrushes in my kit.

 

Edited by Rolig Loon
typos. as always.
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1 hour ago, Rolig Loon said:

As an unrepentant academic, I confess that I will always prefer a long sentence where a short one would serve just as well.  I will use a more specific Latinate word rather than a terse Anglo-Saxon one.  I will use punctuation carefully and perhaps excessively to be sure that my writing carries the nuances that only punctuation can offer (especially in long sentences).

I think this is probably true of me, too, at least in a lot of contexts. I'm sure that I sometimes sound a little like a school marm here on the forums. (I need to buy an appropriate hair style -- something with a very very very tight bun.) But when I need to be precise, or when I want my tone to convey, I don't know, something akin to "authority" or "legitimacy" perhaps, then punctuation, diction, and proper grammar become a really valuable tool.

1 hour ago, Rolig Loon said:

That experience may have scarred me for life, but it taught me how to use punctuation properly -- and told me which rules I could stretch when I didn't think they served my purpose.

I actually wish I'd been taught more grammar. It was, for the most part, something I had to learn on the streets (so to speak).

Personally, I think that the best way to learn how to write well, both in the sense of "correctly" but also "effectively," is to read a lot, and to read broadly.  My teachers, in that sense, have been some of the best writers the language has ever seen, but I've also learned, to somewhat different effect, from reading Buzzfeed.

1 hour ago, Rolig Loon said:

Like you, Scylla, I use a more relaxed style in chat than I do here.  I'm a slow, poor typist, so I use shorter sentences and more slang.  I rarely compromise on punctuation, though.  Those silly little marks are the road signs I use to signal nuances of meaning, mood, and my frequent changes of direction. They are important paintbrushes in my kit.

Actually, even at my most colloquial, I tend to still use punctuation, although not necessarily always in entirely orthodox ways. But it's pretty rare that I won't end a sentence, or even a sentence fragment, without a period or some other form of punctuation. I'm actually very aware of the effect that Lindal and Eva have mentioned -- of sounding abrupt, or overly formal, or bored -- when ending every communication with a period, so I tend to often (maybe too often?) substitute exclamation or question marks. Or, I add an emoji. I think generally it does the trick.

Edited by Scylla Rhiadra
Because no facility with grammar can replace the necessity for a good proofread
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1 hour ago, Eva Knoller said:

Me: Names place with some info... it’s pub-like and shouldn’t be too busy.

Her: We’ve been.

LOL

This response would just make me wilt. I can imagine reading it, and then looking about me in dismay and confusion, to ensure that no one else had read this magnificent put-down!

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2 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

I'm actually very aware of the effect that Lindal and Eva have mentioned -- of sounding abrupt or overly formal, or bored -- when ending every communication with a period, so I tend to often (maybe too often?) substitute exclamation or question marks. Or, I add an emoji. I think generally it does the trick.

I confess to having been totally blind to that possibility.  I have lived by two basic punctuation rules: (1) A declarative sentence ends with a period ( I think that was rule #1 ).  (2) An exclamation point is used to suggest excitement or disbelief.  I was also taught that excessive use of exclamation points, like excessive use of profanity, blunts their effectiveness.  Those two rules have been pretty helpful, and virtually inviolable.  I am slowly becoming addicted to emoji's however.  They add a flair of punctuation that the classical marks can't match.  When I apply an emoji, though, it's either as an interjection 😜 or as an afterthought --- after the period. 😎

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4 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

LOL

This response would just make me wilt. I can imagine reading it, and then looking about me in dismay and confusion, to ensure that no one else had read this magnificent put-down!

Right?!?! She actually does like the place, it’s just her weird texting style. I always feel as if I’ve done something wrong. 😅

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