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What are some of your pet peeves?

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1 hour ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

 

ALTHOUGH, as I've said elsewhere on a few occasions, I think that the admittedly copious "liking" on the vanity threads has contributed to making them mostly very friendly little communities. @cheesecurd

While this is true, it can also devolve into petty things such: as so and so liked everybody’s picture except mine, hmmm, I wonder why? Especially since you can literally see who gave you what sticker. 
 

Also, when they threads like that become little communities, they start to become participation awards. Stick any old thing up in there and someone is going to like it. Then it stops being about taking nice photos and starts being about “I took this picture, like my ish!”

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2 minutes ago, janetosilio said:

Then it stops being about taking nice photos and starts being about “I took this picture, like my ish!”

In the various Look At Me threads, this is pretty much what it is by most of us. Everyone gets a Like for participating.  I do that most of the time and then specifically quote and comment on the pictures that I find truly super for some reason or another.

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2 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

In the various Look At Me threads, this is pretty much what it is by most of us. Everyone gets a Like for participating.  I do that most of the time and then specifically quote and comment on the pictures that I find truly super for some reason or another.

I get that, but what I’m pointing out is it’s fine and pretty much understood that’s what it’s for. However, what happens when you don’t get the sticker like everybody else? It happens and people start noticing things like that.

It was pointed out to me a while back by someone that they indeed were getting “skipped over” by certain people and on the magnitude of those couple of people that were doing it were liking everyone else’s stuff except theirs. Sure enough after a glance...they were right. I felt kind of bad, so I stopped participating in those kind of threads.

Im saying it’s a sticker, yeah, but when someone private messages you out of the blue with “Hey, you ever notice....” it may not be all that friendly and welcoming to everyone. Yeah, it was a little dramatic, but it left an impression.
 

 

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46 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

In the various Look At Me threads, this is pretty much what it is by most of us. Everyone gets a Like for participating.  

Well, that's disappointing. But not unexpected.

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My biggest pet peeve is focused inwardly, when I forget to put on movelock in a public place.  I don't mind getting bumped, even repeatedly is kind of funny  But if I'm afk for a few moments and come back to find myself underwater or in a corner... gah, could have had a V8 and movelock.  

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2 hours ago, janetosilio said:

I get that, but what I’m pointing out is it’s fine and pretty much understood that’s what it’s for. However, what happens when you don’t get the sticker like everybody else? It happens and people start noticing things like that.

It was pointed out to me a while back by someone that they indeed were getting “skipped over” by certain people and on the magnitude of those couple of people that were doing it were liking everyone else’s stuff except theirs. Sure enough after a glance...they were right. I felt kind of bad, so I stopped participating in those kind of threads.

Im saying it’s a sticker, yeah, but when someone private messages you out of the blue with “Hey, you ever notice....” it may not be all that friendly and welcoming to everyone. Yeah, it was a little dramatic, but it left an impression.

Yes, this is to some degree true, although I've never taken the time to notice if it is systematic or not.

I like everyone's pictures myself: I'm fine with this as a sort of "participation" award because, really, there isn't any clear criterion for awarding a like or not (nor should there be, in my view). I myself usually do very well in terms of likes, but I recognize, and have noted there before, that these are not always equitably distributed. In particular, men don't seem to do as well. Actually, maybe more broadly, non-human, non-female, and/or non-adult avatars don't do well. And I very much wish that that were not the case.

In fact, now that I'm thinking about it, there are a few "regulars" who have never, that I can recall, liked one of my pictures. I have no idea if they are liking the pics of others, because I haven't checked, and have no intention of doing so. It doesn't matter that much to me -- but I do understand how it might peeve, or even hurt, if one feels one is being discriminated against (and, again, there clearly are people, or at least categories, that are being discriminated against). Ideally, everyone would like everyone else's pictures, or we would have an established and reasonably clear (and non-discriminatory) set of criteria that we all applied equally. Neither is going to happen.

I don't know what the answer is: I'd also be entirely happy without a reputation system at all, but so long as there is one, I'm going to use it, as much as I can, personally, to demonstrate my appreciation and gratitude for everyone who takes the time and effort to post there.

Edited by Scylla Rhiadra
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8 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

In fact, now that I'm thinking about it, there are a few "regulars" who have never, that I can recall, liked one of my pictures. I have no idea if they are liking the pics of others, because I haven't checked, and have no intention of doing so. It doesn't matter that much to me

Ditto. 

Additionally, there are some regulars that I know for a fact do not Like any photo unless it is something that they consider extremely super in some way.

 

There are a few pictures that I'll skim past and not Like even when I do like most pictures in those threads: 
  - I typically only do a Like for the first picture of a given outfit. If someone posts multiple pics of the same outfit, in separate posts, they usually do not all get a Like from me unless there is something really unique about one of the later ones. 
  - Also, if I'm at work skimming through the thread, I quickly pass by anything that is very risque so that nobody else sees it and thus those types will sometimes not get a Like from me depending on where I'm at when I see it.
  - There are a few themes that just hit me wrong and so I tend to bypass those also, but that doesn't happen very often.

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11 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

Ditto. 

Additionally, there are some regulars that I know for a fact do not Like any photo unless it is something that they consider extremely super in some way.

 

There are a few pictures that I'll skim past and not Like even when I do like most pictures in those threads: 
  - I typically only do a Like for the first picture of a given outfit. If someone posts multiple pics of the same outfit, in separate posts, they usually do not all get a Like from me unless there is something really unique about one of the later ones. 
  - Also, if I'm at work skimming through the thread, I quickly pass by anything that is very risque so that nobody else sees it and thus those types will sometimes not get a Like from me depending on where I'm at when I see it.
  - There are a few themes that just hit me wrong and so I tend to bypass those also, but that doesn't happen very often.

Those seem to me very sensible criteria -- and the NSFW one is probably necessary, as well. I apply an approach on Flickr that is quite different from what I do here, but that somewhat resembles yours. There are particular types of pics -- not merely "risque" but depicting extreme violence, or abuse, or the straight-forwardly pornographic -- that I won't favourite there. Although, even in that instance, there are exceptions: I'll favourite something with explicit sexuality that I would ordinarily pass over, if it's by a friend.

All of this, of course, is a phenomenon born of social media. It's often about popularity, or trying to ingratiate oneself with "influencers," or avoiding perspectives and approaches with which one is uncomfortable, or about gaming the system (which is preeminently what happens on Flickr). Sucks, but so, in a great many ways, does social media.

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2 hours ago, TexangelNoel said:

My biggest pet peeve is focused inwardly, when I forget to put on movelock in a public place.  I don't mind getting bumped, even repeatedly is kind of funny  But if I'm afk for a few moments and come back to find myself underwater or in a corner... gah, could have had a V8 and movelock.  

There’s people like that at social islands all the time, if you have movelock on then suddenly you’re a hacker and being mass reported.

The problem I have with reputation systems and post counts is particularly important in sub forums about help. Here it’s not as bad, there are definitely some users who need to learn how to research what they’re saying first, because they tend to feed newbies just outright wrong information. And that’s a mixed bag of people who are farming post counts but also people who haven’t been told they’re wrong because nobody wants to question the person with a five digit post count.

Its really bad on the Linustechtips forums in particular, where there are a lot of users who just post for the sake of farming points and post count numbers. I stuck to my word and deleted my account there when I hit 10k posts, I don’t want that to affect the information I give, if I’m wrong I want people to tell me I’m wrong without the community of subservient butt kissers to try and back me up because I’m an “influential user”.

It does happen here on SL, in particular with the topic I know a lot about, computer technology. I’m sorry, but there are a select few users here who frequent those threads often and post just blatantly wrong replies. And I will tell you how you are wrong and I will back up my claims. It’s harmful to the person asking help and anyone who googled it in the far future to necrobump the thread to be presented with wrong information that nobody wants to or even can contest because the person who posted it as a bigger e-peen than you.

Also just on that, another pet peeve, the people who talk about tech but have no idea what they’re talking about but are damned sure in themselves because a JIRA from 2008 surely MUST still be relevant in 2019. Graphics cards, this argument:

”SecondLife works better on Nvidia cards/doesn’t work well(or at all) on ATI cards”

Heres my answer to that: 

No, you’re wrong in literally every way possible. ATI hasn’t existed since 2006, this was never a problem with the hardware, it’s because circa 2004 ATI was the most popular maker of laptop video chipsets which were not capable of running SL but everyone was a brainlet and presumed that meant ATI was to blame and not the fact that their gpu was weaker than even the lowest end desktop cards of the era. It has absolutely never under any circumstances been an issue of ATI/AMD Silicon Vs Nvidia Silicon. Driver problems happen on both ends, OpenGL support is literally the exact same every generation on either side, you’re wrong and you are coasting on LITERALLY DECADE OLD FALSE INFORMATION and every time I see it I want to scream.

I swear to god the next time I see the letters “ATI” posted in any context I’m going to have an actual heart attack.

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59 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

In fact, now that I'm thinking about it, there are a few "regulars" who have never, that I can recall, liked one of my pictures. I have no idea

GUILTY! Though I am no longer a 'regular" - the reason I don't do the likes or other tags (on any posts, anywhere) is because I tend to think of those tags literally. It's akin to "If I like-tag most of Scylla's pictures, what about the ones I don't? And then... what about the other peoples where I do a few and not the rest and then the other-others where I do more... UGH!!!!"

Here is what I see with the "like-tags" in the Vanity threads (the literal title and others like it) - lots of cliquish activity going on. I see on my own there are always the same people who never, ever will tag my posts and others who will always tag them. I also see this consistently with other peoples posts in those threads. And it's not just those picture threads, but throughout the forums. If someone decides they don't like you for some reason then they will never tag your posts anywhere, unless it's a "confusion" tag or other less-than-favorable one.

The one and only tag I do appreciate is the "Thanks" tag, especially if I help someone out with trouble-shooting or something. The rest I try hard to ignore (though we all are vain to some degree, so yeah, I hate those things staring me in the face all the time LOL)

I sometimes wish it were a Netflix paradigm: two tags - thumbs-up or thumbs-down and that's it.

Edited by Alyona Su
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I don't get peeved about post counts or reputations because I'm generally clueless about them. Except that I do love that people are able to give themselves a clever little superlative and some are so creative!

To me, those little response stickers are just my personal reaction tags.  I don't think about how many I'm giving or getting.  I'm not a prolific poster and I'm very inconsistent.  Sometimes I post hearts all over the place, just cuz I'm feeling emotional and I want to spread warm fuzzies.  Other times I'm gloomy and stuff and I just mutter to myself when I like something but give no feedback. If someone makes me laugh and I'm in the emo mood, then I will post the big grin.  The same thing might make me laugh when I'm depressed but it won't inspire me to respond.

As far as being impressed by high post counts, nah.  I make up my own mind about who's opinions I value based on what they say.  And I've reached that wonderful age where I really don't care very much what other's opinions of me are.

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49 minutes ago, Alyona Su said:

GUILTY! Though I am no longer a 'regular" - the reason I don't do the likes or other tags (on any posts, anywhere) is because I tend to think of those tags literally. It's akin to "If I like-tag most of Scylla's pictures, what about the ones I don't? And then... what about the other peoples where I do a few and not the rest and then the other-others where I do more... UGH!!!!"

Here is what I see with the "like-tags" in the Vanity threads (the literal title and others like it) - lots of cliquish activity going on. I see on my own there are always the same people who never, ever will tag my posts and others who will always tag them. I also see this consistently with other peoples posts in those threads. And it's not just those picture threads, but throughout the forums. If someone decides they don't like you for some reason then they will never tag your posts anywhere, unless it's a "confusion" tag or other less-than-favorable one.

Hah! Ironically, you were not one of the "regulars" I thought of! But now that you mention it . . .

/me glares

I'm totally fine with your rationale: it makes sense, if you take a particular perspective on the process. My perspective is a bit different, because I see "likes" as more about connection and community, than as a gauge of quality or my preferences.

Again, though, I agree that the entire system can be problematic. Any tool can be used for good or ill: when this one is misused, it can create drama, and real hurt.

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14 minutes ago, kali Wylder said:

As far as being impressed by high post counts, nah.  I make up my own mind about who's opinions I value based on what they say.  And I've reached that wonderful age where I really don't care very much what other's opinions of me are

This is also a very sensible attitude! Maybe the key is less worrying about how we apply "likes" ourselves, and more about how we respond to them. I am personally shallow enough that I do care, somewhat, what other people think of me, but not so stupid as to imagine that the number of "likes" that I accrue is an actual measure of my worth.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to see how my pictures are faring on the vanity threads! Just as soon as I've cleaned away the tears that are puddling on my keyboard after the revelation that Alyona has never "liked" one of my pics . . .

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19 hours ago, cheesecurd said:

This is ironic, but forums. Board style social interaction with accounts and stats and all that. It promotes something referred to in the context of Reddit as “karma whoring”.

You know that stereotype forum user? Anime profile picture, 20k+ posts, some arbitrary amount of “likes”, has some stupid title under their name and a tag like “platinum contributor”.

I hate those people. 

Because what those people do is gain merit and validation based off virtual number counters. If person A asks a question and persons B and C respond, who’s answer is going to be more valid?

Person B who has 20k posts and replies with a low detail wrong answer, or person C who has 10 posts but posts an accurate and explainative answer?

Person B, always. People value those internet points.

This is why anonymous forums and boards are so popular, everyone is on even grounds. You have no virtual points to value and it does not reflect your statements validities or usefulness. If you say something wrong, there is no other aspect that would potentially convince people you are right.

So storytime:

I was once part of a gaming group that joined together with a bunch of others to make a larger group (longish story, and not particularly relevant). The larger group had forums, which included a depressingly large number of anime avatars, and a positive/negative rep system that had a visual indicator, like a set of bars or something. Over time a culture started to develop, where those with higher numbers of arbitrary internet points started to look down on those with lower numbers of arbitrary internet points.

My subgroup wasn't a fan of that kind of pathetic equipment-measuring contest... so we decided to break it.

We made a thread in our subgroup's private subforum, called the "circlejerk", with one simple rule - everyone had to like every single post made, no matter what. Within a few weeks we had dozens of pages of inane drivel, all with 20+ likes each, and a bunch of us gained so many likes that we actually broke the widget that displayed your arbitrary internet points total. A few others started to go into threads and respond with "I see what you're saying, but as you have fewer arbitrary internet points than I do, your opinion doesn't count" and so on.

The best part? The number of people who were unironically furious at how we'd inflated the arbitrary internet point system, cheated our way to the top, and devalued what they saw as a legitimate achievement of theirs. Kinda depressing that these people exist, really.

So yeah, moral of the story: caring about arbitrary "likes" or other fake internet points is really dumb. They're meaningless, have little connection to how good your contributions actually are, and it's a system that is easily gamed (intentionally or otherwise).

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12 hours ago, Alyona Su said:

I sometimes wish it were a Netflix paradigm: two tags - thumbs-up or thumbs-down and that's it.

Unfortunately, negative likes/dislikes can make the 'clique-like' behaviour you mentioned a thousand times more toxic. 

What's the worst that can happen now? People that don't like you ignore your posts? The overwhelming majority of people that read any given post will not leave a reaction anyway. Add the edgy ironic laughing reaction? Congrats, +1 to your arbitrary internet point total.

But if you give people the ability to subtract from that arbitrary total, they will do so as a petty way of 'hurting' you. They'll dislike-bomb previous posts. Small groups might chain dislike anything a given person posts, pushing them into a negative internet point total. And while no one here particularly cares about a low likes-to-posts ratio, this can quickly encourage a culture of "negative points total means you're wrong about everything". Not fun.

And while it would only be a vocal minority that care about such petty things... that's all it takes to harm the overall culture of the forums.

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12 hours ago, cheesecurd said:

I swear to god the next time I see the letters “ATI” posted in any context I’m going to have an actual heart attack.

ATI cards are awesome! 😈

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2 hours ago, AyelaNewLife said:

Unfortunately, negative likes/dislikes can make the 'clique-like' behaviour you mentioned a thousand times more toxic. 

I agree! It was late for me, so my mind wasn't functioning on all cylinders LOL I should clarify:

"I sometimes wish it were a Netflix paradigm: two tags - thumbs-up or thumbs-down and that's it - though in these forums, only the thumbs-up - so you tag or not and nothing more.

But it's all wishful thinking; it is what it is. As for the post by @cheesecurd (I think that's who started this) regarding how people perceive post counts and "reputation" score in replies, I get it. Though I'm not sure the issue is as prevalent as perceived. Perhaps it is in other forums, like actual support forums, etc., but not so much in these forums.

One thing to remember is that in these forums everyone is crazy! :D

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Notice the heading of this forum:

"General Discussion Forum
Second Life discussions welcome here! Please follow the community guidelines"

I notice from time to time that some of the most voluminous topics herein have nothing to do with Second Life. I rather regret the time I have wasted in such topics. 

Maybe we should have a non-SL forum to which we can move discussions that have nothing to do with SL. 

Edited by Erwin Solo
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41 minutes ago, Erwin Solo said:

Notice the heading of this forum:

"General Discussion Forum
Second Life discussions welcome here! Please follow the community guidelines"

I notice from time to time that some of the most voluminous topics herein have nothing to do with Second Life. I rather regret the time I have wasted in such topics. 

Maybe we should have a non-SL forum to which we can move discussions that have nothing to do with SL. 

From Tommy Linden's sticky "Community Participation Guidelines," at the top of this subforum:

Quote

Content that is blatantly off topic is not permitted. You may also not post regarding subjects that do not relate to Second Life except in the General forum discussion board.

If anyone cares, they might quote this for Erwin's information, as I don't think he's seeing my posts.

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1 hour ago, Erwin Solo said:

Notice the heading of this forum:

"General Discussion Forum
Second Life discussions welcome here! Please follow the community guidelines"

I notice from time to time that some of the most voluminous topics herein have nothing to do with Second Life. I rather regret the time I have wasted in such topics. 

Maybe we should have a non-SL forum to which we can move discussions that have nothing to do with SL. 

From @Scylla Rhiadra as requested LOL

Quote

From Tommy Linden's sticky "Community Participation Guidelines," at the top of this subforum:

  Quote

Content that is blatantly off topic is not permitted. You may also not post regarding subjects that do not relate to Second Life except in the General forum discussion board.

If anyone cares, they might quote this for Erwin's information, as I don't think he's seeing my posts.

 

Edited by Alyona Su
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18 hours ago, Alyona Su said:

I sometimes wish it were a Netflix paradigm: two tags - thumbs-up or thumbs-down and that's it.

We have this in the answers section.  It doesn't always go well over there either.

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On 11/22/2019 at 5:34 PM, cheesecurd said:

I swear to god the next time I see the letters “ATI” posted in any context I’m going to have an actual heart attack.

😜

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grindsmygears.jpg?resize=474%2C353&ssl=1

Group synchronised dancing at DJ sets/clubs/events.

It's just bad. Like, who actually sits there watching this nonsense and genuinely thinks that robotic, perfectly synchronised club dancing is a good look? People who build square houses in The Sims, that's who.

Every one of these venues has a dance ball that people could use instead, and even if everyone chose the same dance, the staggered start gives the room enough variation to look at least vaguely natural. But no, hosts (dagger emoji) have to go out of their way to ruin things for everyone. 

And it needs to stop.

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