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Making SL more welcoming to males


Bree Giffen
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On 11/26/2019 at 11:51 PM, ballparkdogg said:

Considering that many of the girls that hate men and prefer women are mostly like a man pretending to be a woman.    

[citation needed]

Actually, even though I *prefer* women, I can't say that I *hate* men. Quite the opposite, I often am amused by them. And sometimes I'm rather annoyed by super-submissive males, as well.

Anyway. I admit I've been both genders in SL (and have never felt unwelcome as either gender), and I did have SLex with both genders, too - but I still prefer women over men.

Edited by ThorinII
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Most big RL companies these days (such as the one I work for) are leading by intentionally focusing on diversity, promoting equality, women as executives, etc. Hopefully this RL focus will "trickle up" to our online experience one day.

On a side note, I discovered a brand of sportswear "Kappa", whose logos have a male and female  silhouette side-by-side. Because they are promoting "equality of the sexes in sports". Looks like two naked people, so I'm shy to wear it to my progressive job (but could explain to anyone who asks or is offended). The world needs more companies like Kappa.

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1 hour ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

Luna, it does you credit that you're trying to engage here with serious questions. In general principle, I agree with and admire this approach -- when the person in question has given any indication that they are interested in anything other than personal abuse.

But don't feed the troll, please: he's just here to harass, and engaging him, even in a well-meaning and serious way, merely enables him.

I suppose you're right.  I always maintain a glimmer of hope though, but sometimes that could be a sign of insanity...lol.

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I can't remember if it was in this thread or another that examples were being put forward of a real man.  Well, this thread will do. :)  I'm subscribed to Bjørn Andreas Bull-Hansen's YouTube channel as he makes sense to me, and is a good example of a real man in my eyes.  By the way, he makes a coffee in each video so you can skip over that to about 3:41 if you like.  I hope the men here are encouraged.

 

Edited by Garnet Psaltery
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41 minutes ago, Garnet Psaltery said:

I can't remember if it was in this thread or another that examples were being put forward of a real man.  Well, this thread will do. :)  I'm subscribed to Bjørn Andreas Bull-Hansen's YouTube channel as he makes sense to me, and is a good example of a real man in my eyes.  By the way, he makes a coffee in each video so you can skip over that to about 3:41 if you like.  I hope the men here are encouraged.

Good god almighty!

Where do I get one of him?! RAWR!

But, yes, I agree with him totally. There are a lot of single moms doing an amazing job of raising their kids, and in a lot of cases having no father around is better than the sperm donor. However, I really do think both boys and girls need a man somewhere, somehow, in their lives to be an example of what a man should be. 

This guy is a freaking fine example of a man. LAWD!

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17 hours ago, Beth Macbain said:

Good god almighty!

Where do I get one of him?! RAWR!

But, yes, I agree with him totally. There are a lot of single moms doing an amazing job of raising their kids, and in a lot of cases having no father around is better than the sperm donor. However, I really do think both boys and girls need a man somewhere, somehow, in their lives to be an example of what a man should be. 

This guy is a freaking fine example of a man. LAWD!

giphy.gif.384cdd9a0c7c99cd8e114b8b05a7f047.gif

My father was a single parent and raised me, my sister and my brother..

He's the hardest working person I know..

He built us a good life and a good business and ran the farm..

We didn't get to run the roads like a lot of kids and i think that is a big key to a lot of things...when we were old enough to work,we helped out also,with chores and the business..

Since i was 11 to 12 years old,I started working in his office where i would do my homework,answer phones and learn to do a lot of the paperwork and accounting and getting permits and so on..

From that,I ended up getting an offer to work at what was at the time,the largest privately owned corporation in north america..

I was going to turn it down,but he told me to take it..

Now i have my three children and my husband ,that i met through my father and the business..

In my eyes,there will never be a more manly man than my father..My husband is very close,but My father's The man.

 

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On 11/15/2019 at 3:07 AM, Lureo said:

Playing SL as a male is hard.

- If you need a nice avatar you have 10% of items than female

- If you want to talk with a female. You are disadvantaged. Female hate males and prefer females. (hate is maybe exagerate but at least you are not welcome) As a male I am always feeling that I disturbe.  if you approach a female she already think that the male want to ***** and try to make the conversation hard telling you that you didn''t start correctly because stating a conversation with hi is not good you need to start with more words. As male you need to be the best and do all the leading. You have not the right to be starter and to be learner. Rarely female start a conversation with male. As a male if you don't start you never talk with a female. If you go in some place people are really strange. I was for example in Franks and pleople are afk most of the time. When they are alive they are really strange and talking a strange language. then they block you.

Yes Second Life is a game for female and male are not welcome.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

1. First mistake "Playing SL -" You do not PLAY SL ie Second Life you participate in the platform with others who come from all types of diversity. 

2. Second "you need a nice avatar" not true, you could be starting out and have a default system / legacy AVI. If you are new and male and want to have help to make your Avatar look better? it is as simple as finding an event, Lets take Bellisseria for example. Finding an event there is easy, while there introduce yourself (do not be rude) maybe say some thing like Hello new neighbors I just got a house boat in region ( XXX ) I am new to Second Life, would anyone be willing to help me out a bit? Simple as that, show yourself to be friendly to get friends. 

3. Third problem I see. "  If you want to talk with a female. You are disadvantaged. " That depends on your approach, first of all let me give you a pointer. READ HER PROFILE doing this can help save you from some really awkward conversation and having to remove your foot from some where uncomfortable. Look guys we appreciate compliments and like it when you take interest in us, BE A GENTLEMEN that point I can not stress enough. Dont be a stalker but perhaps listen/read our conversation it can be a way to enter into the conversation with us. Introducing yourself and asking for make over help because you are a new avi in SL can be a good way to converse with us. A lot of us are, and I can speak for myself - are SL Fashion whores, and I mean that in the nicest way. We can simply take you everywhere in the fashion world of SL that you just SIMPLY must go to. ( DONT ROLL YOUR EYE'S ) I saw that. Your a guy and you dont get off on fashion etc. FINE but you will have to endure it for a short time. We do like a man who appears to take care of himself and has enough self confidence and respect to show it outwardly. 

In closing Back to No.1 SL is NOT a game, it is for Male and Female alike, Males are welcome, here is the disadvantage though. MOST guys do not want to take the time for a Social platform and interact with others on a personal level. My own experience is they would rather plug in the XBox go online and shoot up Zombies, steal cars beat up innocent civilians and shoot cops. Get over yourself, and dont try to compensate you dont have to. Just be the best YOU that you can be. We love you Guys, but many of us are just tired of the same ole bull we get and find in RL that might be why you become an instant turn off in SL. 

Now come on lets go have some fun at this party at the Blues Cafe.   

 

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9 hours ago, Roary McGillivary said:

We love you Guys, but many of us are just tired of the same ole bull we get and find in RL that might be why you become an instant turn off in SL. 

That applies in both directions.  

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A bit late to the topic lol but I wanted to point out a few things from the perspective of a girl that doesn't identify as equal to men nor does she want to be.

It's perfectly fine for women to feel empowered and independent just as it is fine for me to identify as a slave (not just sexual) in any worlds.

I feel uncomfortable around women tbh and they do around me and we never got along. Always had gay/trans male BFFs in any worlds. Massive hi5 to you guyss you are awesomesauce. :3 

I'm straight and extremely devoted to my guy in both worlds. Yet I answer any and each IM warmly and respectfully and end it kindly too, even the dumb ones. We need to feel for one another if we are to survive with dignity. Audrey said that, not me 😛

In other words what I think would draw people, not necessarily men, to SL is not clothes or gender equality. Not everybody wants that. Kindness and acceptance would bring in more crowds, I believe.

And better pets, gawd I wish we had muchhh more realistic kitties and puppies

*mew*

 

ps. as a lifelong gamer i found i could use SL to recruit fellow male gamers to join me in other shooting games and what have you. lol sometimes it works out. depends.

Edited by ErukaVonD
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3 hours ago, ErukaVonD said:

I wanted to point out a few things from the perspective of a girl that doesn't identify as equal to men nor does she want to be.

It's perfectly fine for women to feel empowered and independent just as it is fine for me to identify as a slave (not just sexual) in any worlds.

Being equal to men means one has equal power to choose what one want in their life.  If you weren't equal to men you wouldn't be able to choose to identify as a slave...

Edited by Luna Bliss
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10 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Being equal to men means one has equal power to choose what one want in their life.  If you weren't equal to men you wouldn't be able to choose to identify as a slave...

I agree with you. I didn't choose that. Learned to love it and incorporated it in my personality, it's pretty complex actually. The point is acceptance of different ideas, not only mine but generally. 

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1 minute ago, ErukaVonD said:
13 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Being equal to men means one has equal power to choose what one want in their life.  If you weren't equal to men you wouldn't be able to choose to identify as a slave...

I agree with you. I didn't choose that. Learned to love it and incorporated it in my personality, it's pretty complex actually. The point is acceptance of different ideas, not only mine but generally. 

Yes, I understand. By 'choose' I'm really meaning you wouldn't be allowed to be who you really are...

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I've never been the type of feminist who thought it was horrid if a woman chose to stay home and 'bake cookies'....I've been the type who believed that role (especially rearing children) was just as important as working out in the world....more important really..

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Who I am wasn't chosen by me either. My guy decides pretty much everything for me and I adore him for it. To me being happy is the ultimate goal in life and my happiness lies in submission. I do have great respect for independent women too. I respect everybody tbh which brings me to the main point of my comment, acceptance and kindness is what ultimately brings us together as a community. xo

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