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Making SL more welcoming to males

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9 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

The topic is, why, in our emancipated time when women are equal and have their rights, do some women wish to set the clock back.

Because it's my choice, Prok. Not yours, not anyone else's. No one forces me to do anything I don't want to do. You don't have to approve, or accept, or understand it. I am equal to anyone on this planet and I have my rights, yes, and it is my right to engage in any legal behavior I want. 

Why are you trying to set the clock back by taking away my right to choose? 

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10 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

The topic is, why, in our emancipated time when women are equal and have their rights ...[...]

Actually the topic is Making SL more welcoming to males.  Is that any clearer?

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2 hours ago, Lindal Kidd said:

Thanks for steering us back on topic, Erwin.

Hey, all you male-type guys!  Did you notice there's now a thread about Manly Men?  See?  We're making SL more welcoming to males every day!

No, I think because of the double-standard applied to men's expression in the forums, well explained and brazenly exhibited above, that men do well to avoid gendered topics in these forums when they can. I regret entering this topic after what has transpired here, and am now doubly on my guard. 

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1 hour ago, Lindal Kidd said:

Aww, Erwin...don't be that way!

woman-comforting-man-sad-men-has-problem

Cheap shot because you know that males cannot get away with returning the condescension in-kind. 

SL is very welcoming to males (which is the original topic here).  The general discussion forums not so much. 

Edited by Erwin Solo
Typo
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Just now, Erwin Solo said:

Cheap shot because you know that males cannot get away with returning the condescension in-kind. 

SL is very welcoming males (which is the original topic here).  The general discussion forums not so much. 

Who ate too many Grumpy Oats this morning?  I had to spend quite a while looking for that image, I'll have you know...because most of the results were men comforting women.  So there!

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I have to admit, watching all you lovely ladies sharing your wit and intellect unapologetically is not only refreshing but quite welcoming.

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On 11/15/2019 at 4:07 AM, Lureo said:

Playing SL as a male is hard.

- If you need a nice avatar you have 10% of items than female

- If you want to talk with a female. You are disadvantaged. Female hate males and prefer females. (hate is maybe exagerate but at least you are not welcome) As a male I am always feeling that I disturbe.  if you approach a female she already think that the male want to ***** and try to make the conversation hard telling you that you didn''t start correctly because stating a conversation with hi is not good you need to start with more words. As male you need to be the best and do all the leading. You have not the right to be starter and to be learner. Rarely female start a conversation with male. As a male if you don't start you never talk with a female. If you go in some place people are really strange. I was for example in Franks and pleople are afk most of the time. When they are alive they are really strange and talking a strange language. then they block you.

 

Considering that many of the girls that hate men and prefer women are mostly like a man pretending to be a woman.    

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1 hour ago, Marut72 said:

I have to admit, watching all you lovely ladies sharing your wit and intellect unapologetically is not only refreshing but quite welcoming.

Look at this guy, trying to get him some brownie points!

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55 minutes ago, ballparkdogg said:

Considering that many of the girls that hate men and prefer women are mostly like a man pretending to be a woman.

Which, if so, solves our problem! We don't need to change a thing to attract more men: they're coming so that they can pretend to be women!

Actually, if this is true, we'd be attracting more men pretending to be women if we made SL more attractive to women, no? Because that's what they're representing as?

Clearly, that's what this thread should really be about!

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15 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

You wanted to know how to attract more men, and I'm telling you the answer, like it or not.

But again, if the question is "how to attract more men," you need to ensure that there are more verifiable females.

The idea that you don't have to do this, or that you shouldn't do this for ideological reasons, means that you won't attract more men. So it's up to you, what your goal is.

I picked a few comments out because they stood out to me.  Our opinions are based on our experiences.  I've met very few men who only came here to have sexual relations with real life women, but I'm sure there are a few.  The vast majority of people I've met are here to experiment with something other than what they are.  They're here to live a different life.  Do you really think the only way to attract more men is to take that anonymity away?  That alienates the men that are here to try something else.  You've just lost all those men.  SL would shrink.

I suppose the Lab could make a new marketing scheme where they advertise "SecondLife!  Where you can only be a man if you have proven you are one in Real Life"  or "SecondLife!  Where you can only play as a woman if you are one in Real Life".  I don't think that will attract more men.

What about the vampires, elves, furries, tinies?  What about Roleplay?  Sorry, you can only play as what you are.  Everyone else has to leave.  SL shrinks.

If SL required gender/species verification to play, just so a few men lacking confidence could know they were talking up a real life woman, men would actually leave.  Women would leave, too.  Not much of a world left.  No imagination.  No creativity in appearance.  SL shrinks.

Better to just create a small group for them where you can only join if your gender is verified.  Maybe it will attract just those few men who are scared of accidentally running into a man playing a woman.

Edited to add:  Was the question How to Make SL more welcoming to cis/het men?

Edited by Cinnamon Mistwood
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49 minutes ago, Lindal Kidd said:

It is!  I gave his post a "like"!

/me whispers hoarsely: He called us "lovely," Lindal! And says he enjoys our "wit"!!!

*preens*

Ya know, Gadget could learn a thing or two. Just sayin'.

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3 hours ago, Gadget Portal said:

Look at this guy, trying to get him some brownie points!

Why so serious? You already got yours. :P

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5 hours ago, ballparkdogg said:

Considering that many of the girls that hate men and prefer women are mostly like a man pretending to be a woman.    

In my part of SL, friends communicate mostly by voice (Discord these days, but Teamspeak and Ventrillo before that). SL voice works ok, but lacks the bells and whistles of the gaming voice programs. 

About 10% have different apparent gender in-voice versus apparent gender in-world. People got used to it a long time ago, and it's no big deal. 

Certainly it does not, in the balance, tip the scales toward making SL either more or less attractive for men. It's a wash in my opinion.

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7 hours ago, Marut72 said:

I have to admit, watching all you lovely ladies sharing your wit and intellect unapologetically is not only refreshing but quite welcoming.

Your attempt to flatter is both transparent and effective. 😏

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9 hours ago, Erwin Solo said:

SL is very welcoming to males (which is the original topic here).  The general discussion forums not so much. 

perhaps not, but they'd be deadly dull without the guys who comment here.

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23 hours ago, elixdude said:

I can't relate with these because I usually hangout at gay community sims. So barely see the females (duh). 😁

Well, you were lucky to get that calling. For those of us that did not, perhaps someday we'll have the technology to put one gender's brain in the other gender's body. We could make a game of it.  Maybe call it Second Life.

Edited by Erwin Solo
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5 hours ago, Akane Nacht said:

Your attempt to flatter is both transparent and effective. 😏

Thank you kindly for noticing. I believe a bit of flattery is a good thing but I do mean every word I’ve carefully chosen sincerely. I’ve had wonderful conversations with very deep and strong women on Second Life, something I’ve not had enough of in real life. It’s just much easier here. 

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On 11/26/2019 at 1:32 PM, Garnet Psaltery said:

Actually the topic is Making SL more welcoming to males.  Is that any clearer?

Maybe the task should be to make SL more welcome for everybody, and then males, females, whatever, will take care of itself. 

The forums wouldn't be putting the best foot forward.

 

And indeed, the topic of *this discussion* is indeed why women want to be subjugated and brutalized.

So if you think that's fine, and some sort of "culture" or "lifestyle," then your plan is to attract the most brutal and authoritarian men who retreat from real life where their wives and girlfriends want freedom and equality, to a world where they can have a harem, and subs, and capture roleplay.

I guess I don't see the Lindens, who are basically liberals and leftists, as doing that. I think if they were to deliberately advertise to the worst sort of men who want to brutalize women, before long, their peers in Silicon Valley and the tech press would go after them. 

Edited by Prokofy Neva
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2 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

So if you think that's fine, and some sort of "culture" or "lifestyle," then your plan is to attract the most brutal and authoritarian men who retreat from real life where their wives and girlfriends want freedom and equality, to a world where they can have a harem, and subs, and capture roleplay.

If it makes you feel any better, Prok, I remember avoiding the designated "male dominant" areas because they actually didn't tend to attract dominant/brutal/authoritarian men. They attracted entitled whingebags who had no clue how to create a dominant dynamic of their own and had to rely on sim rules that stated all men were automatically in charge because men. One of them reported me to the mods once because I made a crack about him needing to buy me a drink first. 

Don't even get me started on Gor.

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A bit late to this discussion, but after reading some of the replies, I'll leave this to say:

I am a male, I haven't had any issues with feeling unwelcome(because of my gender, I DO feel unwelcome because of social anxiety that everyone hates me lmao). While I do have a big variety of avatars which all have different genders depending on who I wish to be today, I've not felt unwelcome when using my male avatars.

Granted I tend to get "hit on" more when using my female or female-ish avatars if that is what you are wanting as in "feeling more welcome", but that's not to say I've been hit on when using my male avatars either, but in general, with my male avatars I tend to get more "Hey whats up?", rather than "Hey wanna bang?" which I see with my female avatars.

As for lack of clothing for males, I suck at clothing in general, which is why I REJECT CLOTHING ALL TOGETHER. IT IS EVIL AND I CANNOT FIGURE OUT FASHION (fur helps in this situation though). I've done lots of searching on the MP, trying to find something simple, not overly complex, etc, and I see the following for males(both avatars and outfits):

  • Beefy mc buff
  • Thug
  • Extra beefy
  • "Mess with my family and I'll mess with you IRL"

And I have seen the following for females:

  • Full perm retexture #5719473
  • Skimpy
  • BIG BOOTY
  • "I'm a drama queen"

As such, I think the MP is diluted with a bunch of the same thing over and over again for both genders. I just want normal every day clothing for people who are not "BEEF MC BEEF" or "guys my thighs are 1 mile wide", or people who look like copy/pastes. I'm not buff IRL, nor am I fat IRL, I am slightly overweight but only slightly. I want outfits I would wear IRL that are not full perm retexture and have modify permissions so I don't have to deal with stupid scripts that are unneeded.

NOW I KNOW THIS IS GOING TO BE HEAVILY CONTROVERSIAL, but I don't like the club scene. There is a bazillion of them and we need something more original because clubs, in my opinion, tend to devolve into the following categories:

  • Everyone thinks everyone wants to bang them and as result, their response to someone striking up a conversation is: "Not interested."
  • Everyone is talking with their friends in IMs and local chat isn't inviting.
  • The DJ finds a few tracks off youtube and plays them like a playlist.
  • Someone gets upset that someone else is there and drama erupts.

What needs to be done here is create something original, some hangout that provides amusement and entertainment that isn't the same club scenarios repeated forever. This is why I much prefer hangout sandboxes over clubs. People are goofing off and having a fun time, and you bump into people and stuff isn't being taken too seriously. I know there is a place on the destination guide that does a hangout/games thing, and it seems more welcoming than a club would be.

Then again, this is all being said where I am scared to talk to anyone in fear of judgement. What I feel may be either slightly or very different from anyone else, but personally I haven't had any issues aside from the masters of drama.

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OK, the out-and-out cynic in me has come up with 'The Ultimate Man Magnet Noob Account Creation Plan'. Here goes:

Open up a chain of cyber brothels staffed with scripted animesh NPC hookerbots offering free sexxies to male avatars under 30 days old. Bump them up the destinations listings until one or more get on the rotating list of adult destinations offered at the new account welcome areas. I doubt it would do much for account retention, but it might ramp up the creation of new accounts.

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6 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

Maybe the task should be to make SL more welcome for everybody, and then males, females, whatever, will take care of itself. 

The forums wouldn't be putting the best foot forward.

 

And indeed, the topic of *this discussion* is indeed why women want to be subjugated and brutalized.

So if you think that's fine, and some sort of "culture" or "lifestyle," then your plan is to attract the most brutal and authoritarian men who retreat from real life where their wives and girlfriends want freedom and equality, to a world where they can have a harem, and subs, and capture roleplay.

I guess I don't see the Lindens, who are basically liberals and leftists, as doing that. I think if they were to deliberately advertise to the worst sort of men who want to brutalize women, before long, their peers in Silicon Valley and the tech press would go after them. 

I guess you've never met The Old Spice manly man..

hehehehe

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