Arielle Popstar Posted August 18, 2023 Share Posted August 18, 2023 1 hour ago, Persephone Emerald said: Current social norms in the western world say that the sex a person is designated to be is one thing, but their gender is something else. So if a person identifies as trans or transitioning, then their gender is whatever they say it is. If they enter into a more serious relationship in RL or SL, they should tell their partner that they're trans/ transitioning, because to not do so would only create more problems later.. Is it a current social norm or just something what some think it should be? Is it ethical for someone to claim they are a particular gender when they have not been born with that particular plumbing? This is a question being asked by a lot more then just the OP. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted August 18, 2023 Share Posted August 18, 2023 Heading into the weekend... 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BilliJo Aldrin Posted August 18, 2023 Share Posted August 18, 2023 (edited) 1 hour ago, Arielle Popstar said: Is it a current social norm or just something what some think it should be? Is it ethical for someone to claim they are a particular gender when they have not been born with that particular plumbing? This is a question being asked by a lot more then just the OP. best we stear clear of discussing the claims of the trans community in here. The forum is full of trans allies that would love to report anyone that deviates from the accepted position. Transphobia doncha know. You have been warned 😂 Edited August 18, 2023 by BilliJo Aldrin spelling Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diamond Marchant Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 (edited) 6 hours ago, Silent Mistwalker said: The only way I can answer this is to say the avatar is not real, the person behind the keyboard is. The part of this discussion I am focusing on concerns what you can know about any person behind the keyboard. Profile info and voice confirmation are not reliable to establish sex or gender (and in fact, could be specifically designed to deceive you). In a virtual world such as SL, for those desiring casual pixel sex, avatar presentation and words in a chat window are likely all you have for decision making. Edited August 19, 2023 by diamond Marchant 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Persephone Emerald Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 (edited) 2 hours ago, Arielle Popstar said: Is it a current social norm or just something what some think it should be? Is it ethical for someone to claim they are a particular gender when they have not been born with that particular plumbing? This is a question being asked by a lot more then just the OP. In plumbing, male threading is on the outside, while female threading is on the inside. Humans are much more complicated than pipe fittings. They have chromosomes which are usually either XX or XY, but can also sometimes be X (Turner syndrome), XXY (Klinefelter syndrome), XYY (Jacob's syndrome) or XXX. The way their "plumbing" might be expressed can also vary greatly. Humans also have brains and minds, which are very, very complicated. When you reduce human sexual and gender variation to just "plumbing", you do humanity a great disservice. Also, since the OP did NOT ask about human "plumbling", I think you're trying to take this thread Off-Topic. Edited August 19, 2023 by Persephone Emerald 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BilliJo Aldrin Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 Onlyfans AI models are starting to become a thing now. If its a guy running a channel how does that affect your perception of the model? A man or a woman running the channel, what does it matter? Its not real its all computer generated. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BilliJo Aldrin Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 7 minutes ago, Persephone Emerald said: In plumbing, male threading is on the outside, while female threading is on the inside. Humans are much more complicated than pipe fittings. They have chromosomes which are usually either XX or XY, but can also sometimes be X (Turner syndrome), XXY (Klinefelter syndrome), XYY (Jacob's syndrome) or XXX. The way their "plumbing" might be expressed can also vary greatly. Humans also have brains and minds, which are very, very complicated. When you reduce human sexual and gender variation to just "plumbing", you do humanity a great disservice. Also, since the OP did NOT ask about human "plumbling", I think you're trying to take this thread Off-Topic. This thread ran its course a few pages ago, i think Its time to shut it down before it gets ugly. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Mistwalker Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 3 hours ago, diamond Marchant said: The part of this discussion I am focusing on concerns what you can know about any person behind the keyboard. Profile info and voice confirmation are not reliable to establish sex or gender (and in fact, could be specifically designed to deceive you). In a virtual world such as SL, for those desiring casual pixel sex, avatar presentation and words in a chat window are likely all you have for decision making. You can learn a lot about a person just by conversing with them, not at them. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuietEventide Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 (edited) 4 hours ago, Persephone Emerald said: Since this thread is probably going to get locked soon anyway. Why would it get locked...? If this thread should for some reason get locked I would kindly like to ask the person who locks it to clearly explain why. A couple of other threads are into their hundreds of pages, this one only has 16 at the time of writing. I find the discussion interesting and it seemed like the original poster did too. I'm trying to learn from it. Honestly. I vote for keeping this thread open. Edited August 19, 2023 by QuietEventide 4 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diamond Marchant Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 8 hours ago, QuietEventide said: Why would it get locked...? Only guessing... - way off topic of the OP - "inflammatory content (Politics, Social Justice issues and Interpersonal disputes)" 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arielle Popstar Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 11 minutes ago, diamond Marchant said: - "inflammatory content (Politics, Social Justice issues and Interpersonal disputes)" The content is within the context of SecondLife. Outside of it, much of it would have no relevance. If they were to lock the thread for that, they may as well just shut the whole forum down. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maitimo Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 On 8/15/2023 at 12:34 AM, Gopi Passiflora said: Hello all, I am a mostly straight man in real life who has avatars/accounts of different kinds (male and female, human and non-human, etc.) I do have woman avatars but I do not put my real life gender on them because I actually want other residents to think they are really women - even if I do not intend on pursuing relationships in virtual worlds. But after reading this forum, I'm beginning to think this may not be ethical. I'm curious if you think I should put my real-life gender on my woman avatars' profiles in order to deal with other residents in an ethical manner, or if it's okay to keep it hidden. I've tried it both ways and honestly? I didn't notice any difference. Except that if I include it, and I get unwanted sexual attention, I can say "psst, you may want to read my profile before taking this conversation any further". It's a convenient way of filtering out the sort of people I probably wouldn't want to talk to anyway. 5 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BilliJo Aldrin Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 2 hours ago, Maitimo said: I've tried it both ways and honestly? I didn't notice any difference. Except that if I include it, and I get unwanted sexual attention, I can say "psst, you may want to read my profile before taking this conversation any further". It's a convenient way of filtering out the sort of people I probably wouldn't want to talk to anyway. the quickest way to to get rid of an annoying guy is to say, oh i was lying before, I’m actually a guy in rl 😂 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amanda Crisp Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 (edited) On 8/18/2023 at 9:47 AM, Ceka Cianci said: Dancing is like the standing up version of cuddling.. When i get asked to dance, I pretty much always find an excuse not to.. Mainly because it's never, Want to shake the ground we walk on out on the dance floor and work up a sweat? hehehe It's always, lets turn the volume down from eleven to to one and slooow dance on the hottest slow dance on the list.. hehehe.. I also love SLOW dancing, thats also SL romantic Edited August 19, 2023 by Amanda Crisp 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ceka Cianci Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 2 minutes ago, Amanda Crisp said: I also love SLOW dancing, thats also SL romantic Ya, it's nice if someone is looking for that or likes romance in here.. Myself, I try and avoid it if I can.. I have that in RL already.. SL for me is a place to just relax and unwind and toy around in and curb my urge to SHOP! \o/ hehehe 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathlen Onyx Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 7 hours ago, Amanda Crisp said: I also love SLOW dancing, thats also SL romantic So true and why I hate when asked by a total stranger that the dances they pick out are the sexual or slow dances. I don't know you well enough to do that with you 2 seconds after meeting you. I wish guys would stop this. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BilliJo Aldrin Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 (edited) 10 hours ago, Sam1 Bellisserian said: So true and why I hate when asked by a total stranger that the dances they pick out are the sexual or slow dances. I don't know you well enough to do that with you 2 seconds after meeting you. I wish guys would stop this. Dancing, like cuddles, is quite often a prelude to sex. Mmmmm we are slow dancing, do you feel my excitement building as i grind against you? Whacha say we go get comfy someplace private. No? Why not baby,? We are just cartoons, its not real. Lets enjoy ourselves free of our rl inhibitions. 😂 Edited August 20, 2023 by BilliJo Aldrin added a line Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ingrid Ingersoll Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 1 hour ago, BilliJo Aldrin said: We are just cartoons, its not real. Lets enjoy ourselves free of our rl inhibitions. I just want to update your avatar so badly. 2 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BilliJo Aldrin Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 34 minutes ago, Ingrid Ingersoll said: I just want to update your avatar so badly. whats wrong with my avi? I have the maitreya body, and usually wear mesh hair. I admit my head is still system, but its the face shape I was born with. I do not like mesh heads in the slightest, they still all seem to look similar. I suppose if i could edit a mesh head to exactly match my shape now, i’d consider trying one. Besides all the best avatars are the mesh body / system head combination. And yes i know, thats just my opinion, it doesnt make it right 😂 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ingrid Ingersoll Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 1 hour ago, BilliJo Aldrin said: whats wrong with my avi? nothing! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Persephone Emerald Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 (edited) 2 hours ago, Ingrid Ingersoll said: I just want to update your avatar so badly. This^ not directed at anyone specifically. I may love your personality and chatting with you, but I'm visually oriented when it comes to SL sex. Unfortunately, even the best looking avatars look wonky with SL animations. Edited August 20, 2023 by Persephone Emerald 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liaa Nova Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 On 8/15/2023 at 12:34 AM, Gopi Passiflora said: Hello all, I am a mostly straight man in real life who has avatars/accounts of different kinds (male and female, human and non-human, etc.) I do have woman avatars but I do not put my real life gender on them because I actually want other residents to think they are really women - even if I do not intend on pursuing relationships in virtual worlds. But after reading this forum, I'm beginning to think this may not be ethical. I'm curious if you think I should put my real-life gender on my woman avatars' profiles in order to deal with other residents in an ethical manner, or if it's okay to keep it hidden. I don't think you need to, no. There is never a guarantee of the real life sex of the avatar and as your avi IS a woman, that's all they need to know unless you start to become friends, then yes, let them know. Same goes for anyone trans. It doesn't matter unless you start to get close to someone, then yes they need to know, even if you believe you're actually female/male. The right person won't have any problem with it and if they do at that early stage, you had a lucky escape 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BilliJo Aldrin Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 32 minutes ago, Liaa Nova said: I don't think you need to, no. There is never a guarantee of the real life sex of the avatar and as your avi IS a woman, that's all they need to know unless you start to become friends, then yes, let them know. Same goes for anyone trans. It doesn't matter unless you start to get close to someone, then yes they need to know, even if you believe you're actually female/male. The right person won't have any problem with it and if they do at that early stage, you had a lucky escape Its possible to get close to someone in sl even though you both have no desire or intention to take it to real life. In that case the rl gender of either party is unimportant. However if one party changes their mind and wants real life, and the other doesn't for any reason (not just because you misrepresented your gender) It's best to cut it off fast and for good. People should be honest about maybe eventually wanting a rl relationship, then those of us that are happy with sl only can shut the relationship down before it gets started. 😁 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diamond Marchant Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 2 hours ago, BilliJo Aldrin said: I do not like mesh heads in the slightest, they still all seem to look similar. I have had the complete opposite experience. When you consider the combinations of creator/product, shape, skin, eye/color, brows, hair, makeup, freckles, etc the different looks seem endless. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathlen Onyx Posted August 20, 2023 Share Posted August 20, 2023 3 minutes ago, BilliJo Aldrin said: Its possible to get close to someone in sl even though you both have no desire or intention to take it to real life. In that case the rl gender of either party is unimportant. Not true. I've made friendships with women that I have shared some pretty personal things with that a man just wouldn't understand because they never went through it themselves and that I would never, ever discuss with a male. So for me it matters. If it doesn't matter to you that is fine but just know that for some it does. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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