Relax buddy, I’m not looking at your girlfriend!

[davidventer]

Okay, so, funny story…
 

Due to the performance issues of the Firestorm viewer, I’ve been using the official Second Life viewer a lot lately.

I was recently at a club and some girl In front of me DM’s me and tells me to “take a picture it lasts longer” and then the dude next to her turns around, flips me off (I guess he’s got the new Vista AO, since I have it too and it can actually do that), and he also DM’s me, angry about apparently perving his girl. 

At first I thought; WHAT TF are they on about? I wasn’t even looking at them until they DM’d me. Then I realized, they can obviously see my “look-at” crosshairs since it can’t be hidden on the official Second Life Viewer. I wasn’t even looking at them, I was just dancing there, enjoying the tunes. But since they were right in front of me, my idle crosshairs must’ve been right on them. 
 

I found this interaction extremely amusing, but once again baffled by why people get so uptight about being looked at on Second Life, using a debug function to see what everyone is looking at, as if it’s some “privacy” feature. 

I responded to the situation by telling the girl that I’m staring at her boyfriend and not her (but I really wasn’t staring at either of them) and then I told her boyfriend (the one flipping me off) “that’s hot” and he should let me know if he wants me to sit on his finger. After this, their defensiveness towards me died down and we ended up having a fun and playful back-and-fourth banter session. But then the guy sends me a Gyazo snapshot of where to disable my look-at, and I explained that I know where, but I’m not using Firestorm at the moment due to its terrible performance. 

Then I discovered the new Alchemy viewer, which also has the ability to disable the “look-at” crosshairs, featured as a “Privacy” setting. Alchemy has epic performance so now I’m using Alchemy instead and have look-at disabled but, funny stories and musings aside; WHY is the community as a whole so obsessed with this debug function? Why is it being used as a “Privacy” feature? And WHY do people take such offense when they think they’re being looked at, even when they’re not?!

And I’m quite annoyed that I have to use a TPV in order to not get stupid DM’s related to what or who I’m apparently looking at. 

It’s funny and bizarre when some people hide their look-at, but they insist on being able to see other people’s look-at. Like why is this even a thing? Why is it even an issue? It’s a DEBUG function, it’s not supposed to be a “Privacy” feature. I wish Linden Lab would update their TPV guidelines to prevent TPV’s from exposing it as a Privacy feature. Or if that will upset too many people, perhaps include it in the official viewer as a “Privacy” feature then too. But ultimately what’s the point of even having it when everyone disabled their own look-at and just use it as a tool to bother those who are apparently looking at them, or to obsess over what other people are looking at…. Like WHAT the actual F…. Lol. 
 

This is both really funny and tragically sad at the same time... This debugging tool being used as a Privacy feature to bother other people about what they’re apparently looking at… Like WHAT?! 🤷🏻‍♂️😂

Edited January 29, 2022 by davidventer

[Scylla Rhiadra]

2 minutes ago, davidventer said:

Okay, so, funny story…
 

Due to the performance issues of the Firestorm viewer, I’ve been using the official Second Life viewer a lot lately.

I was recently at a club and some girl In front of me DM’s me and tells me to “take a picture it lasts longer” and then the dude next to her turns around, flips me off (I guess he’s got the new Vista AO, since I have it too and it can actually do that), and he also DM’s me, angry about apparently perving his girl. 

At first I thought; WHAT TF are they on about? I wasn’t even looking at them until they DM’d me. Then I realized, they can obviously see my “look-at” crosshairs since it can’t be hidden on the official Second Life Viewer. I wasn’t even looking at them, I was just dancing there, enjoying the tunes. But since they were right in front of me, my idle crosshairs must’ve been right on them. 
 

I found this interaction extremely amusing, but once again baffled by why people get so uptight about being looked at on Second Life, using a debug function to see what everyone is looking at, as if it’s some “privacy” feature. 

I responded to the situation by telling the girl that I’m staring at her boyfriend and not her (but I really wasn’t staring at either of them) and then I told her boyfriend (the one flipping me off) “that hot” and he should let me know if he wants me to sit on his finger. After this, their defensiveness towards me died down and we ended up having a fun and playful back-and-fourth banter session. But then the guy sends me a Gyazo snapshot of where to disable my look-at, and I explained that I know where, but I’m not using Firestorm at the moment due to its terrible performance. 

Then I discovered the new Alchemy viewer, which also has the ability to disable the “look-at” crosshairs, featured as a “Privacy” setting. Alchemy has epic performance so now I’m using Alchemy instead and have look-at disabled but, funny stories and musings aside; WHY is the community as a whole so obsessed with this debug function? Why is it being used as a “Privacy” feature? And WHY do people take such offense when they think they’re being looked at, even when they’re not?!

And I’m quite annoyed that I have to use a TPV in order to not get stupid DM’s related to what or who I’m apparently looking it. 

It’s funny and bizarre when some people hide their look-at, but they insist on being able to see other people’s look-at. Like why is this even a thing? Why is it even an issue? It’s a DEBUG function, it’s not supposed to be a “Privacy” feature. I wish Linden Lab would update their TPV guidelines to prevent TPV’s from exposing it as a Privacy feature. Or if that will upset too many people, perhaps include it in the official viewer as a “Privacy” feature then too. But ultimately what’s the point of even having it when everyone disabled their own look-at and just use it as a tool to bother those who are apparently looking at them, or to obsess over what other people are looking at…. Like WHAT the actual F…. Lol. 
 

This is both really funny and tragically sad at the same time... This debugging tool being used as a Privacy feature to bother other people about what they’re apparently looking at… Like WHAT?! 🤷🏻‍♂️😂

We had a giant train wreck of a thread a short while ago on this very subject, so generally I don't want to rehash it.

I have begun to wonder, though, if people getting upset at being "looked at" (or having their gf looked at) aren't engaged in something a little bit like RP. Not consciously or deliberately, but reacting in an overly dramatic way because it feels "immersive" and "real." Like a scene from a bad teen movie, or Taxi Driver. And maybe some men (and doubtless some women) think it makes them look "gallant" and "protective" (and pretty damned possessive, too) to "defend the honour" of their partner?

Just idle thoughts. Anyway, I'm glad this worked out well for you! Nicely handled!

[Rowan Amore]

11 minutes ago, davidventer said:

Okay, so, funny story…
 

Due to the performance issues of the Firestorm viewer, I’ve been using the official Second Life viewer a lot lately.

I was recently at a club and some girl In front of me DM’s me and tells me to “take a picture it lasts longer” and then the dude next to her turns around, flips me off (I guess he’s got the new Vista AO, since I have it too and it can actually do that), and he also DM’s me, angry about apparently perving his girl. 

At first I thought; WHAT TF are they on about? I wasn’t even looking at them until they DM’d me. Then I realized, they can obviously see my “look-at” crosshairs since it can’t be hidden on the official Second Life Viewer. I wasn’t even looking at them, I was just dancing there, enjoying the tunes. But since they were right in front of me, my idle crosshairs must’ve been right on them. 
 

I found this interaction extremely amusing, but once again baffled by why people get so uptight about being looked at on Second Life, using a debug function to see what everyone is looking at, as if it’s some “privacy” feature. 

I responded to the situation by telling the girl that I’m staring at her boyfriend and not her (but I really wasn’t staring at either of them) and then I told her boyfriend (the one flipping me off) “that hot” and he should let me know if he wants me to sit on his finger. After this, their defensiveness towards me died down and we ended up having a fun and playful back-and-fourth banter session. But then the guy sends me a Gyazo snapshot of where to disable my look-at, and I explained that I know where, but I’m not using Firestorm at the moment due to its terrible performance. 

Then I discovered the new Alchemy viewer, which also has the ability to disable the “look-at” crosshairs, featured as a “Privacy” setting. Alchemy has epic performance so now I’m using Alchemy instead and have look-at disabled but, funny stories and musings aside; WHY is the community as a whole so obsessed with this debug function? Why is it being used as a “Privacy” feature? And WHY do people take such offense when they think they’re being looked at, even when they’re not?!

And I’m quite annoyed that I have to use a TPV in order to not get stupid DM’s related to what or who I’m apparently looking it. 

It’s funny and bizarre when some people hide their look-at, but they insist on being able to see other people’s look-at. Like why is this even a thing? Why is it even an issue? It’s a DEBUG function, it’s not supposed to be a “Privacy” feature. I wish Linden Lab would update their TPV guidelines to prevent TPV’s from exposing it as a Privacy feature. Or if that will upset too many people, perhaps include it in the official viewer as a “Privacy” feature then too. But ultimately what’s the point of even having it when everyone disabled their own look-at and just use it as a tool to bother those who are apparently looking at them, or to obsess over what other people are looking at…. Like WHAT the actual F…. Lol. 
 

This is both really funny and tragically sad at the same time... This debugging tool being used as a Privacy feature to bother other people about what they’re apparently looking at… Like WHAT?! 🤷🏻‍♂️😂

Check page 5 of the general discussion section for a locked.thread on this topic.  It's a hoot.

[davidventer]

3 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

We had a giant train wreck of a thread a short while ago on this very subject, so generally I don't want to rehash it.

I have begun to wonder, though, if people getting upset at being "looked at" (or having their gf looked at) aren't engaged in something a little bit like RP. Not consciously or deliberately, but reacting in an overly dramatic way because it feels "immersive" and "real." Like a scene from a bad teen movie, or Taxi Driver. And maybe some men (and doubtless some women) think it makes them look "gallant" and "protective" (and pretty damned possessive, too) to "defend the honour" of their partner?

Just idle thoughts. Anyway, I'm glad this worked out well for you! Nicely handled!

In an RP setting that actually makes a lot of sense yeah. I hadn’t thought of it in that way. I can see how it’s super useful in such regard. But in that case, Linden Lab should consider exposing it as an easy-to-disable setting in the official viewer so that cross-hairs of those using the official viewer can also be hidden from other people, that way RP’ers won’t pull random people into their personal RP. And those who want to be pulled into it can keep their cross-hairs enabled. Time to file a Jira, I suppose. 😬

[LykanXEclipse]

Well in viewers like the official or the ones that no have that option, you can still tune up the attentions.xml file to control it

Read this:[the last example tell you how tune/edit] http://wiki.secondlife.com/wiki/Show_Look_At this will make your crosshair(point/look at) no leave your head axis (XYZ) you can still camming freely but the crosshair will no move from your head, it will no hide names tho to the fs viewer function so ppl there will see your crosshair+name stick to your head lol

And yeah some people love create drama about it, if they start being agressive just block and move on 

[Eddy Vortex]

This is why I always have to remember to park my mouse pointer on the ceiling when in public to avoid this kind of drama.

[Ayeleeon]

I really don't get it. It doesn't bother me a bit if some guy looks at my girlfriend, I trust her not to run off and leave me just because some other guy thinks she is pretty.

[Scylla Rhiadra]

2 minutes ago, Eddy Vortex said:

This is why I always have to remember to park my mouse pointer on the ceiling when in public to avoid this kind of drama.

Well, Eddy, if I found your crosshairs on me, I'd just be flattered, and probably swoon a bit.

[Aiyumei]

How dare you use your eyes and crosshairs to look at other people in public spaces? Didn't your parents teach to wear blindfolds outside? 

Did we reach a point where looking at others is forbidden? 

[Eddy Vortex]

20 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

Well, Eddy, if I found your crosshairs on me, I'd just be flattered, and probably swoon a bit.

Just don't hit your head on the way down.

[Scylla Rhiadra]

Just now, Eddy Vortex said:

Just don't hit your head on the way down.

If only there were something nearby that was comfy and cosy and well-padded to catch me as I fall . . .

[Sprout Evergarden]

if people want to oggle my pixels go a ahead it costs alot to make a nice avi if you like my work i am flattred

[Amina Sopwith]

This happens to me in RL. Less as I've got older but as a teenager, it happened ALL THE TIME.

Basically, I'm off in my own world most of the time (some people believe I am a maladaptive daydreamer....I've no official diagnosis but I can believe it). As a kid, there were several occasions where I had no idea where my eyes were resting, since I wasn't actually taking in whatever they were looking at, and suddenly there'd be an angry face in my field of vision demanding to know why I was staring at her (it was always a her. Men just tended to wave their hands in front of my face or hit on me).

It was no good trying to explain that I was just staring vacantly into space while having some epic adventure in my head. I was definitely STARING AT THEM WITH INTENT. I wondered sometimes if it did come across as aggressive, but photos exist and I can confirm I looked as gormless as expected. 

It was worth it for the time a girl pounced on me suddenly to demand to know why I was staring at her, and startled me so badly (she was really shouting) that I jumped and screamed, which caused her to jump and scream, which caused her group of friends to jump and scream, and while everyone was jumping and screaming I just legged it out of there. 

[Eddy Vortex]

1 hour ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

If only there were something nearby that was comfy and cosy and well-padded to catch me as I fall . . .

Will this one do?

[Scylla Rhiadra]

2 minutes ago, Eddy Vortex said:

Will this one do?

Perfect.

[Sukubia Scarmon]

2 hours ago, Ayeleeon said:

I really don't get it. It doesn't bother me a bit if some guy looks at my girlfriend, I trust her not to run off and leave me just because some other guy thinks she is pretty.

Well, you don't seem to be insecure then. Because that's how it should be. But there's quite a few people out there who are so insecure, they cannot handle that like a normal adult would, and instead fly off the handle. Why they would enable that feature in the first place, is somewhat beyond me. Are they so bored, so empty of anything that they have literally nothing better to do than enable a feature and then go cry about what they see? I don't know, if I don't want anyone to look at me, I don't go places, or would disable that feature and don't think about it. 

[Lucia Nightfire]

5 hours ago, davidventer said:

Okay, so, funny story…

Somehow I think you and the OP of this thread share the same cerebral cortex:

🤔

[davidventer]

1 hour ago, Lucia Nightfire said:

Somehow I think you and the OP of this thread share the same cerebral cortex:

Someone didn’t read the whole post 🤷🏻‍♂️😅

[CaithLynnSayes]

I really don't mind if people look at "my avatar", not actually me. First off, way too many people seem to be detached from reality and think they are actually their avatar. That in itself is a little amusing to me. Also, "my avatar" is just a combination of other people's art work i just happened to bring together in what might be seen as unique i guess. So go ahead, look at it for as long as you want.

 

About the look-at thing. I have it turned on to see what other people are looking at, and i will admit i've sometimes used it in the past to maybe mess a bit with new people letting them know i know what they are looking at. It's amusing to me more than anything to kind of mess with their heads in that way then to get upset with it.

If you get upset by someone looking at a 3D representation of "yourself" in things like Second Life then i can suggest a couple of good therapists or maybe go outside or something... Geez...

[davidventer]

10 hours ago, davidventer said:

Time to file a Jira, I suppose. 😬

Okay, I did a thing: https://jira.secondlife.com/browse/BUG-231722

Chime in there if you want this "feature" blocked... Or if you want to have it added to the Official Viewer so that the in-world experience isn't different than that of Third-Party viewers.

[Sprout Evergarden]

this whole thread reminded me of this old classic

 

[davidventer]

4 hours ago, CaithLynnSayes said:

 

I really don't mind if people look at "my avatar", not actually me.

 

Same. It’s just pixels on a screen in a Sandbox MMO. Cam and stare all you like. But I would just prefer it if others didn’t get all rude and defensive in my DM’s based on what they think I’m apparently looking at. Like WTF lol. Yeah… it’s amusing at first, but the fun of it wears off after a while and it just becomes annoying.

Pro tip for the people who get upset when others’ crosshairs are near them: Disable the “look-at” debug tool and you won’t see the crosshairs; you don’t have to stress about who’s crosshairs are near you. Peace of mind for all and less clutter on your screen. You’re welcome. But seeing as some people do take such things way too seriously, and can’t seem to live without it; it’s useful to be able to hide it from them. Here’s hoping that Linden Lab will integrate a toggle to easily hide it without having to modify XML files. I want no part in anyones “why are you looking at me” BS and drama. 

Edited January 30, 2022 by davidventer

[Akane Nacht]

I've only been a party to one "staring incident" in SL. I had parked my cursor on a random spot while shopping and went afk to go to the loo. When I returned, a girl had IM'd me asking why I was looking at her. I told her the truth, and she seemed kinda disappointed. 😅

[davidventer]

28 minutes ago, Vanessa Amethyst said:

this whole thread reminded me of this old classic

 

OMFG I loved that series!!! 🙌👏😂

[PermaRuthed]

If people hate being looked at, they should just walk around in whole body alpha layer and nothing else. Problem solved!

Edited January 30, 2022 by PermaRuthed