Is Second Life more toxic than other games in general?

[Purr Waifu]

On 1/8/2024 at 11:05 PM, Silent Mistwalker said:

Been there, done that more than a decade ago. Still run across toxic people in SL occasionally. Whenever I leave home mostly.

I have a no drama policy now so if anyone starts something it's on the block list instanty. All my friends knows this

[PheebyKatz]

On 1/2/2024 at 10:01 AM, Katherine Heartsong said:

We also make it easy to avoid conflict in many cases. If I read in someone's profile they despise men playing female avatars, or they support this or that political or world viewpoint I vehemently disagree with, I simply don't ever engage. It's not like the real world where you can say hi to someone at a party and then get into a nice convo and then they spew out something nasty and you're kind of trapped. One reason I like good profiles in SL, btw.

It does help a lot when people are courageous enough to say what they like and what they don't like in their profiles. It especially helps to prevent me from unintentionally tormenting people who are SLKidphobic, because if they express this in their profile I do make a point of giving them their personal space and stuff (for the most part). Anyone else, of course, is fair game.

I have my own phobias, revulsions, and deep dislikes as well, and when people do take the time to describe themselves in their profile it helps me a great deal in avoiding conflict. It's not a judgement thing either, like, "oh, there goes one of those nasty people", more like, "ah, that one is into things I cannot countenance, I shall not impose upon them with my presence, as I cannot help but open my mouth about things."

It's a lot easier to live and let live when people put the effort into making a good profile.

Edited January 14 by PheebyKatz

[Robberinthemuseum]

I find that people in sl tend to be more extreme in every direction. It's very easy to idealize and view friends as perfect, because they really seem that way. It's also easy to recognize toxic behavior, but sometimes difficult to avoid them because they usually have a lot of pain of some kind in their life. It's hard to reject someone who is behaving in an unpleasant way because of chronic loneliness or illness. I put up with a lot, but everyone has their limits. 

[Midnoot]

This topic is funny if you came from "real" games before coming to SL. You know,  places where competitive gameplay exists,  people will do anything get an advantage over you & if they lose, insult your momma in 3 languages. The only competition I see in SL is for attention. Believe me, I know the social 'game' can get heated, but I usually just end up blocking people who cause me distress.

.. But then there's the possibility that they stick around your favorite hangout spots and slander you until you become an outcast in your own sims if you're not capable of exposing their malicious intentions.. HMMMM, actually, this is getting kinda dark. Maybe the social game is toxic af.

 

HMMMmmm, I've also had people attempt to befriend my own friends in attempts to pit them against me... HMMMM, it's all coming back.. Maybe SL IS more toxic than other games... Especially when the people doing these things are intelligent enough to fly under the radar of oblivious sim owners and moderators while they wreak havok. You'd be surprised how many times it happens.

Edited January 14 by Midnoot

[Scylla Rhiadra]

I think, based not merely on what I read here, but on what I've heard from friends and others over the years, that I must just be extremely fortunate. I'm not being snide when I say that: I have no reason not to believe the stories of toxic behaviour I've heard, some of which have come from friends whose integrity I trust.

But I just haven't run across much of this in-world. I haven't even experienced much in the way of drama -- at least, nothing more dramatic than an occasional case of hurt feelings or a broken friendship.

By FAR the most toxic behaviour I've had first-hand experience of in SL has been here, on these forums. And in fairness it was often brutal.

But that was years and years ago. My SL really seems very tame.

[PheebyKatz]

26 minutes ago, Midnoot said:

Especially when the people doing these things are intelligent enough to fly under the radar of oblivious sim owners and moderators while they wreak havok. You'd be surprised how many times it happens.

A single stubborn, dedicated person, with more time on their hands than they know what to do with, and a bad case of unwarranted self-importance, and their head up their butt, along with a few sticks, and chips of various kinds all over their shoulders, on a social platform where you can make an army of alts and the sim owner can only be there part of the day? Yeah.

This is why a lot of new people feel like there's a palpable wall of resistance when they show up at well-established communities and try to be social. It's psychic armor, with troll-detection programming running in the background.

It's why I always advise new and sincere residents to be patient, and give everyone a chance to accept them for a while before trying to dive into places with established communities.

I've been on the same sim for around 6 years or so, steadily, but my first 2 years I lurked. I see people lurking in my old favorite lurk spots now, and it warms my heart, because they might end up becoming active in the community like I did that way.

If they don't turn out to be some dooky-brain.

Edited January 14 by PheebyKatz

[PheebyKatz]

13 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

By FAR the most toxic behaviour I've had first-hand experience of in SL has been here, on these forums. And in fairness it was often brutal.

Be glad you never had to use IRC to find anime. Some of those people were Cenobites, and I don't mean the Catholic kind.

Edited January 14 by PheebyKatz

[Robberinthemuseum]

30 minutes ago, Midnoot said:

This topic is funny if you came from "real" games before coming to SL. You know,  places where competitive gameplay exists,  people will do anything get an advantage over you & if they lose, insult your momma in 3 languages. The only competition I see in SL is for attention. Believe me, I know the social 'game' can get heated, but I usually just end up blocking people who cause me distress.

.. But then there's the possibility that they stick around your favorite hangout spots and slander you until you become an outcast in your own sims if you're not capable of exposing their malicious intentions.. HMMMM, actually, this is getting kinda dark. Maybe the social game is toxic af.

 

HMMMmmm, I've also had people attempt to befriend my own friends in attempts to pit them against me... HMMMM, it's all coming back.. Maybe SL IS more toxic than other games... Especially when the people doing these things are intelligent enough to fly under the radar of oblivious sim owners and moderators while they wreak havok. You'd be surprised how many times it happens.

I was a secret boyfriend of someone who did this to me. It broke my heart when I realized what was happening 💔 and I realized the reason I was a secret was because if he was with me publicly, everyone would be confused because he had scapegoated me to them to avoid taking responsibility. It really hurt and made me completely reject him even as an acquaintance. 

[PheebyKatz]

57 minutes ago, Robberinthemuseum said:

I was a secret boyfriend of someone who did this to me. It broke my heart when I realized what was happening 💔 and I realized the reason I was a secret was because if he was with me publicly, everyone would be confused because he had scapegoated me to them to avoid taking responsibility. It really hurt and made me completely reject him even as an acquaintance. 

When I reclaim my throne in the Underworld, I will prepare a special place for him.

He will not like it.

Edited January 14 by PheebyKatz

[Silent Mistwalker]

9 hours ago, PheebyKatz said:

When I reclaim my throne in the Underworld, I will prepare a special place for him.

He will not like it.

Dad changed his will again? 👿

[PheebyKatz]

5 hours ago, Silent Mistwalker said:

Dad changed his will again? 👿

He's my ex. We had a pre-nup, but I got human lawyers now, and they're fixing it all for me. Turns out there's a loophole where abduction and swineherds are involved.

Pain and suffering, never brought me flowers, and that whole fiasco with that Persephone chick... Dude owes me bigtime.

[Silent Mistwalker]

14 hours ago, PheebyKatz said:

He's my ex. We had a pre-nup, but I got human lawyers now, and they're fixing it all for me. Turns out there's a loophole where abduction and swineherds are involved.

Pain and suffering, never brought me flowers, and that whole fiasco with that Persephone chick... Dude owes me bigtime.

Human lolyers...

Hell hath no fury...

Poor Dad.

So, which number ex are you? 😇

[Katherine Heartsong]

15 hours ago, PheebyKatz said:

... and that whole fiasco with that Persephone chick... Dude owes me bigtime.

Oh, what's our gorgeous @Persephone Emerald been up to now? teasing!!!

Oh, this Persephone! Nevermind.

Edited January 15 by Katherine Heartsong

[Luna Bliss]

2 hours ago, Katherine Heartsong said:

Oh, what's our gorgeous @Persephone Emerald been up to now? teasing!!!

Oh, this Persephone! Nevermind.

@Persephone Emerald  Where did you get that hair?  It's so unique!  I have to have it.... ;0

[Krystina Ferraris]

2 hours ago, Katherine Heartsong said:

Oh, what's our gorgeous @Persephone Emerald been up to now? teasing!!!

Oh, this Persephone! Nevermind.

So cool, She’s taking a selfie 

[Donovan Michalski]

On 1/14/2024 at 3:42 AM, Midnoot said:

I've also had people attempt to befriend my own friends in attempts to pit them against me... HMMMM, it's all coming back.. Maybe SL IS more toxic than other games... Especially when the people doing these things are intelligent enough to fly under the radar of oblivious sim owners and moderators while they wreak havok. You'd be surprised how many times it happens.

I think this is a good example of the particular type of "toxic" that's so common and destructive here when compared to other games.

Rather than outright aggression, it tends to be more manipulative.  Sure, direct attacks are still mixed in from time to time, but it's the quiet whispers in the background that often lead to things spiraling out of control.  

[Arielle Popstar]

Other games one can just frag others to work out the micro aggression. Maybe we need send people to a zombie fragging sim to work it out:

[Love Zhaoying]

You know, if you try hard you can MAKE Second Life more toxic.

Goals!

 

[Arielle Popstar]

Bottling it up without a place to vent results in more explosive toxicity. Staying in denial is never a good thing.

[Love Zhaoying]

Griefing is a healthy outlet, that keeps Second Life less toxic!

[Cinnamon Mistwood]

1 hour ago, Arielle Popstar said:

Bottling it up without a place to vent results in more explosive toxicity. Staying in denial is never a good thing.

Unleashing every negative thought that crosses our mind on the people around us is not a good thing. 

Adults know when and where to vent because we're not toddlers anymore.

Wait.

Most adults know when and where to vent because they're not toddlers anymore.

A few SL forumites are publicly, destructively toxic, but no worse than anywhere else with moderation.   I think they would get bored if people just ignored them or blocked them if they have no self control.

[PheebyKatz]

9 hours ago, Silent Mistwalker said:

Human lolyers...

Hell hath no fury...

Poor Dad.

So, which number ex are you? 😇

I AM NUMBAH ONE~!

Now, on toxicity, I could give you a phonebook's worth of examples concerning Hades.

Narcissistic, sociopathic, straight-up incel. Iunno what I ever saw in him.

*goes to preen before the mirror for a few hours, before her puny worshippers show up for temple services*

[Ceka Cianci]

1 hour ago, Arielle Popstar said:

Bottling it up without a place to vent results in more explosive toxicity. Staying in denial is never a good thing.

But it's so much more delicious when it's bottled.. So much better than that can of worms crap that people keep trying to pawn off as good quality scrumptious bottled toxicity.. yum yum

 

[Arielle Popstar]

57 minutes ago, Cinnamon Mistwood said:

Unleashing every negative thought that crosses our mind on the people around us is not a good thing. 

Adults know when and where to vent because we're not toddlers anymore.

Wait.

Most adults know when and where to vent because they're not toddlers anymore.

A few SL forumites are publicly, destructively toxic, but no worse than anywhere else with moderation.   I think they would get bored if people just ignored them or blocked them if they have no self control.

That was why I suggested fragging Zombies because the reality when we get right to it is that only a small percentage of adults are capable of dealing with their feelings as they were never taught how. If the adults don't know how then the children they raise will not have a good role model so guess what they will turn into it?

For proof one just has to look at typical sitcoms and soap operas to see what is being role modeled to the general populace.

[Luna Bliss]

1 hour ago, Cinnamon Mistwood said:

Unleashing every negative thought that crosses our mind on the people around us is not a good thing. 

Let it all out, Cinnamon....