Should I put my real-life gender in my woman avatars' profiles?

[Istelathis]

26 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Yes we should evaluate the consequences of being so open in 2nd life given the way the US is heading. 

It is getting very scary out there, a lot of people have boarded the pipeline of hate and I'm afraid where this will lead.  There are key political figures that will have no qualms with using certain demographics as their scapegoats when things go wrong, the stage is being set and unfortunately the chopping blocks are already out.  

[Istelathis]

1 hour ago, Silent Mistwalker said:

I don't need you to explain the same things over and over that I have known for decades. I keep having to repeat that. I was partying with LGBT+ in the freaking 70s and 80s. No, I am not LGBT, never have been but I will say the only les that had any interest in me (even though I was with my boyfriend) was too shy to ask me to dance. So, I asked her. I wanted to help her overcome her shyness. It worked.

None of this answered my questions.

People are afraid Silent, you will have to answer that question for yourself.  

Edited August 23, 2023 by Istelathis

[Love Zhaoying]

8 minutes ago, Istelathis said:

40 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Yes we should evaluate the consequences of being so open in 2nd life given the way the US is heading. 

It is getting very scary out there, a lot of people have boarded the pipeline of hate and I'm afraid where this will lead.  There are key political figures that will have no qualms with using certain demographics as their scapegoats when things go wrong, the stage is being set and unfortunately the chopping blocks are already out.  

Perhaps a year ago, people (women) in the Forum changed their profile pictures in protest. 

In case y'all forgot.

[Silent Mistwalker]

13 minutes ago, Istelathis said:

People are afraid Silent, you will have to answer that question for yourself.  

Afraid of what? Afraid I'm not a woman? Afraid I'm smarter than they are? Afraid I'm not white? What? I can safely say I am two of those things. I am female and I am not white.

I don't take my fear of the big bad scary world out on everyone else? Why are they taking theirs out on me?

I answered that question for myself long ago. I'm still waiting for the rest of the world to catch up.

 

 

[Arielle Popstar]

47 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Agreed...this can be one way stereotypes are born....by those ignorant of science and how it operates.

But science isn't the whole story. It only tells us where we are at best but doesn't give us the direction where we need to go. That is where spirituality comes into the picture. Without that we remain little better than the fruit fly with a little more IQ.

[Cinnamon Mistwood]

4 minutes ago, Arielle Popstar said:

But science isn't the whole story. It only tells us where we are at best but doesn't give us the direction where we need to go. That is where spirituality comes into the picture. Without that we remain little better than the fruit fly with a little more IQ.

I have zero spirituality.    Still smarter than a fruit fly and don't I don't need an external source to give me direction or meaning to my life.  Sounds like you might, though.  I hope you find what you need you need outside of yourself or... dang, it has to relate to SL.  I hope you find it in SL. 

[Arielle Popstar]

9 minutes ago, Cinnamon Mistwood said:

I have zero spirituality.    Still smarter than a fruit fly and don't I don't need an external source to give me direction or meaning to my life.  Sounds like you might, though.  I hope you find what you need you need outside of yourself or... dang, it has to relate to SL.  I hope you find it in SL. 

When I say spirituality I am not referring to a religion but those concepts that make up part of the human experience in a societal structure. As a few examples it can include:

• Deepening connections with other people
• Experiencing compassion and empathy for others
• Experiencing feelings of interconnectedness
• Feelings of awe and wonder
• Seeking happiness beyond material possessions or other external rewards
• Seeking meaning and purpose
• Wanting to make the world a better place

Those intangible aspects is what raises us above the commonly held views of the animalistic nature. It is part of growing up and maturing.

[Luna Bliss]

48 minutes ago, Arielle Popstar said:

1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said:

Agreed...this can be one way stereotypes are born....by those ignorant of science and how it operates.

But science isn't the whole story. It only tells us where we are at best but doesn't give us the direction where we need to go. That is where spirituality comes into the picture. Without that we remain little better than the fruit fly with a little more IQ.

I know I've been speaking to the hard sciences here with my fruitfly talk and its effect on genes (the physical or material world), but these realms do influence all other areas of life too (what I call the 'deeper' aspects or 'spiritual aspects" you allude to).  Also, the soft sciences are my favorite, and they very much have to do with all the other realms you're including under the 'spiritual' category. I especially love Transpersonal Psychology.

[Persephone Emerald]

1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said:

I know I've been speaking to the hard sciences here with my fruitfly talk and its effect on genes (the physical or material world), but these realms do influence all other areas of life too (what I call the 'deeper' aspects or 'spiritual aspects" you allude to).  Also, the soft sciences are my favorite, and they very much have to do with all the other realms you're including under the 'spiritual' category. I especially love Transpersonal Psychology.

This is not at all relevant to the OP's question, but I'm just gonna say that fruit fly genetics is very simplistic compared to human genetics. This is why we study it in College Freshman biology classes and labs. I didn't read your link about fruit flies, but the lack of correspondence between fruit fly biology vs. human biology is why I left a laugh emoji earlier. 

I also think the "soft sciences" are more interesting when it comes to human behavior, that scientific data is great, but it's not perfect, and that personal human experience is a perfectly fine source when it comes to answering questions about personal opinion.

Edited August 23, 2023 by Persephone Emerald

[Luna Bliss]

3 hours ago, Persephone Emerald said:

answering questions

You told me not to be concerned about you, and I told you I was not in that instance, but now I am very concerned. Concerned about your wimmin talk with the mans in your life you have been having trouble with (stated earlier in your list of those you'd have trouble talking to about various subjects).  And so, to help you, I found this important piece of work, a 103 page study to assist you in your struggle:

https://cornerstone.lib.mnsu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1428&context=etds

/silliness

Edited August 24, 2023 by Luna Bliss

[BilliJo Aldrin]

On 8/22/2023 at 5:40 AM, Phil Deakins said:

Make up your mind. You want it both ways.

Either it's my Second Life, in which case I am free to feel deceived if that's what I choose, or I can "eff off and go join Tinder" because it's not my Second Life.

Nice try, but you can't have it both ways.

Sorry Phil, I didn't contradict myself at all.

 

Edited August 24, 2023 by BilliJo Aldrin
personal attack, deleted

[BilliJo Aldrin]

On 8/22/2023 at 7:58 AM, Sam1 Bellisserian said:

This is why I have one close friend in SL and that's it.  What a very sad attitude to have.

I have several close friends in here, and, I am very happy with my second life.

Why? Because I don't feel the need to conform to anyone elses expectations of what my second life should be.

As I said in my "about", in fact from almost the very first day, "I'm living MY second life, NOT yours"

 

Edited August 24, 2023 by BilliJo Aldrin
added stuff

[PheebyKatz]

[Kathlen Onyx]

1 hour ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

As I said in my "about", in fact from almost the very first day, "I'm living MY second life, NOT yours"

 

Every single person says that about SL. LOL

[Silent Mistwalker]

[BilliJo Aldrin]

4 hours ago, Sam1 Bellisserian said:

Every single person says that about SL. LOL

So what is the problem then, if everyone is here for their own reasons and living their SL as they see fit?

The problems start when others expect you to conform to their idea of what second life should be.

Some rando guy: "I'm here in SL to meet my next rl love, so tell me all about yourself.... or else"

[Phil Deakins]

1 hour ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

The problems start when others expect you to conform to their idea of what second life should be.

You mean problems like being told they can eff off and go to Tinder?

You muckied yer ticket with that comment, lass.

Edited August 24, 2023 by Phil Deakins

[Daphne Dench]

I am very glad that I read this, and I am shocked about what I read here.

All that you guys have proven to me, with your posts here, is why my friendslist is this short, and why I do not connect with so many in Second Life. Why they feel to me like they are frauds. 

The answer seems to be: Because they are! 

If everyone is a fraud, and so many do not want to level with their co-citizens, how can friendships even begin to start. 

It appears to me that most of you are not adult enough to even live with themselves, let alone with others. 

And it also explains to me why so many are suspicious. One trusts others like oneself is. 

With what I read here above, it seems to me that you guys are ruining a very beautiful world, called Second Life. And not only that, you also proove to me you hold in contempt everyone you meet there.  

Daphne Dench - August 24 2023 

Edited August 24, 2023 by Daphne Dench

[QuietEventide]

3 hours ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

Some rando guy: "I'm here in SL to meet my next rl love, so tell me all about yourself.... or else"

I have had SL experiences of this type more than once. Those experiences have taken their toll I'm afraid. Quite a bit.

In my case it's been more about faking the age than about faking the gender. Presenting "myself" as being 25 and "hot" when I'm really 65 and well past sell by date with saggy boobs is not right either. I shouldn't do it.

"Hello 60's my old friend
We're back to guilt and shame again"

SL has unlimited possibilities for avatar & region creation, but I feel increasingly uncomfortable in the social hangouts in-world.
It is utterly impossible to live up to (everyone else's) expectations of "what SL is". I can't do it. And I sure as heck can't live up to (everyone else's) expectations of what I should or should not be. I was never on SL for relationships in the first place...

But I sure learned a lot along the way and I am genuinely grateful for that. Enough to know when it really is time to call it a day - that is good knowledge too.

Might set up a "blog" or something for my cartoons, to disconnect my RL self from the SL avatars, so they are no longer personal.

I think that may be the way to go – to observe rather than participate.
Jeff Goldblume's character Ian Malcolm put many things so very eloquently, and one of the best is of course: "Life finds a way". 

Edited August 24, 2023 by QuietEventide

[Phil Deakins]

1 hour ago, QuietEventide said:

But I sure learned a lot along the way and I am genuinely grateful for that. Enough to know when it really is time to call it a day - that is good knowledge too.

That sounds as though you are stopping using SL. I suggest that you rethink it, especially in the light this forum where many people have told us the sort of ages they are. Tbh, I've been surprised at how many of us are older and haven't been in the prime of life for a very long time. I'm in the prime of old age, for instance, and I can still get out of SL everything I ever wanted to get out of it 

Edited August 24, 2023 by Phil Deakins

[QuietEventide]

48 minutes ago, Phil Deakins said:

That sounds as though you are stopping using SL.

Not at all, I still find it a very creative environment.

I'm not stopping SL completely, just the social aspects, and I'm adjusting the way I am looking at SL as a whole.

Just when you think you've "got it figured out", you find yet another level and you have to reassess your thinking.

I put quite a bit into my little "SL photo studio" which I rebuild from time to time. That's where I set up the images. It's got various houses, scenery, trees, even some jumping dolphins from TrigiTec (I really like them).

The photo studio region is down at the moment but I am considering rebuilding it at some point, that's just a question of finding a suitable spot for it. It's all good.

Edited August 24, 2023 by QuietEventide

[Orwar]

3 hours ago, QuietEventide said:

In my case it's been more about faking the age than about faking the gender. Presenting "myself" as being 25 and "hot" when I'm really 65 and well past sell by date with saggy boobs is not right either. I shouldn't do it.

   I don't think anyone has said that your avatar must appear to be of a similar age to your real self, just as no one has said that you can't have an avatar of the opposite gender - it becomes deceptive when you claim that it is, when it isn't. 

   Besides, since when are saggy 65-year olds not 'hot'? 

[Zalificent Corvinus]

4 hours ago, Daphne Dench said:

With what I read here above, it seems to me that you guys are ruining a very beautiful world, called Second Life. And not only that, you also proove to me you hold in contempt everyone you meet there.  

So.

When some over entitled incel oaf, who can barely string together a coherent sentence, and who thinks SL is some kind of 3D Tinder, IM's me out of the blue, and I REFUSE to tell him my real name, age, home address, telephone number, bra size, and provide streaming webcam footage of me stripping naked to prove my gender, because I have NO intention of having anything to do with said jerk, that is *ME* "ruining SL"?

Well I can confirm I certainly have contempt for YOUR opinion on this matter.

I log into SL for ME, not as some unpaid entertainer for anyone else, regardless of how over entitled they may be.

[Luna Bliss]

5 hours ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

9 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

"The most important thing about education is to have an open mind. The more we know about the world, the more we can understand and appreciate it.

A thought-provoking devil’s advocate will trigger those perspectives or viewpoints that we have not thought of and will help us to think in ways contrary to our conditioned ways of thinking or believing.

Socrates developed a famous mental model for seeking truth called the Socratic Method. The Socratic method (also known as the method of Elenchus) is a form of a cooperative argumentative dialogue between individuals, based on asking and answering questions to stimulate critical thinking and to draw out ideas and underlying presuppositions.

The process of seeking the truth is like climbing the steps of a ladder. By climbing, we ensure, acknowledge, and understand each step, but also we leave that step behind as we climb up. By leaving we ensure it is no longer an obstruction in our journey ahead. But if we keep collecting all the steps we have climbed upon, their combined weight will not let us climb further.

In this quest for truth, we start to connect all the dots by synthesizing all the collective knowledge and wisdom—one is achieved by learning (knowledge) and the other by experience (wisdom).

This not only helps to hone our fluid intelligence, but we can learn to recognize patterns in everything that we see around us. We do not find ourselves in crisis when the world operates disproportionately to our values or meaning.

As was said, if the truth is eternal, the quest for truth also will be eternal. It’s a journey of evolution full of possibilities".

Expand  

It's a shame the world no longer operates like the way you describe.

Person A: This is true

Person B: No, This is true.

Person A: You are an evil racist transphobic homophobic bigot, you need to be cancelled.

😂

What I quoted means the exact opposite of how you're interpreting it. Please read it again.

 

[CandyCole]

Grow up.