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4 hours ago, Tari Landar said:

Is this something those people always do, like, for every type of holiday and/or celebration... ?

Yes.

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5 hours ago, Tari Landar said:

I mean if I wanted to go all out for Valentine's day and give gifts to all that are special in my life...why shouldn't I? How am I invalidating your interpretation of a holiday's origin (as defined by you, or those before you) in showering those for whom I have some level of affection? I know that no one will actually answer that, or any questions remotely like it, but I would love if someone actually could.

lol I probably spend too much time trying to figure all this out. It could be like PTSD, where my mind keeps going back to it in an attempt to sort it out, due to my witnessing all the pain the type of attitude we're describing causes others.

Hmmm everybody has their notion of paradise don't they -- some place to arrive at in the future or a place that was lost in the past and can be recovered -- a place of safety. This is a mythic force in human consciousness, a determination of whether we should remain the same or change, and it does seem we need both depending on the time or experience.
Unfortunately I live in an unbalanced area of the country that predominately believes there is some nirvana we can return to where all is orderly in the world and as it always should have been, apparently lost due to modernity. This type of person LOVES, and I mean LOVES, tradition -- in their mind going back to this imagined place of 'rightness' or following a set of rules is paramount in their lives, and when you mess with this they are left spinning around in space without roots, or without any guidance for their life. They can't seem to deal with the fact that there is no absolute truth, and that rules are subject to change and created as humanity evolves. They can't feel safe unless they force others to believe what they believe, as seeing others with differing beliefs reminds them that their cherished beliefs are not actually absolute.

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6 hours ago, Phil Deakins said:
14 hours ago, KanryDrago said:

No Christmas has nothing to do with Santa Claus or even Jesus

Correction: The original 'festival' HAD nothing to with Santa Claus or even Jesus, but it does now. That's why it's now called Christmas.

I'd have to look at the stats, but I think Christmas has pretty much morphed into 'Happy Holidays' for the majority of those celebrating the Holiday. It will be interesting to see how it changes in the future..

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2 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:
6 hours ago, Phil Deakins said:
14 hours ago, KanryDrago said:

No Christmas has nothing to do with Santa Claus or even Jesus

Correction: The original 'festival' HAD nothing to with Santa Claus or even Jesus, but it does now. That's why it's now called Christmas.

I'd have to look at the stats, but I think Christmas has pretty much morphed into 'Happy Holidays' for the majority of those celebrating the Holiday. It will be interesting to see how it changes in the future..

Umm..it means literally “Christ Mass”..

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8 hours ago, Phil Deakins said:

Correction: The original 'festival' HAD nothing to with Santa Claus or even Jesus, but it does now. That's why it's now called Christmas.

Somewhat similar to how All Hallows Eve (in preparation for All Saints Day the following day) became Halloween.

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1 hour ago, Selene Gregoire said:

Somewhat similar to how All Hallows Eve (in preparation for All Saints Day the following day) became Halloween.

samhain became all hallows eve then went to halloween you mean

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8 minutes ago, KanryDrago said:

samhain became all hallows eve then went to halloween you mean

Yep. Just didn't go that far back.

Samhain/Calan Gaeaf marked the end of the harvest season and beginning of winter.

Edited by Selene Gregoire

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13 minutes ago, Selene Gregoire said:

Yep. Just didn't go that far back.

Samhain/Calan Gaeaf marked the end of the harvest season and beginning of winter.

If we keep going back, we’ll be dancing around Stonehenge models.

 

 

 

2575633A-AE8C-47B5-8831-C09955C0D1C0.gif

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6 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

If we keep going back, we’ll be dancing around Stonehenge models.

 

 

 

2575633A-AE8C-47B5-8831-C09955C0D1C0.gif

why use a model when the real thing is just down the road ;)

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4 minutes ago, KanryDrago said:

why use a model when the real thing is just down the road ;)

Because it gave me a reason to post Spinal Tap.

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On 2/18/2019 at 10:52 AM, Bitsy Buccaneer said:

You've really rather missed the entire point of what I was saying, Bradford. If that was a competition, you'd have won it by miles.

Well from my interpretation, to avoid anyone feeling left out, the plan was for everyone to give others a card.

Everyone else couldn't give a stuff about Valentine's Day, due to it being diluted to triviality.

You received few cards compared with others and wasted your time by putting too much thought and effort into the newly defined version of a tradition.

Result: The new "idea" to avoid someone feeling left out, ended up with you feeling hurt and left out, what a fantastic result that was.

Here's a new plan: Don't allow anyone to send or receive cards, that way nobody can feel left out our get hurt. Level the playing field! 

Google results describe my interpretation of Valentine's Day as the traditional one.  If I am not someone's Valentine, I don't want silly fake Happy wishes from them.

As to the poster who said I don't get to define holidays, nope, government decides public holidays, V day is not, in any country.

 

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1 hour ago, Bradford Mint said:

As to the poster who said I don't get to define holidays, nope, government decides public holidays, V day is not, in any country.

 

Governments may be able to dictate what holidays are considered public(in our case, federal) within the confines of their country borders, but they don't define, whatsoever, how people celebrate them. There is a very distinct difference between those two things, and one of them typically has legal purposes/reasons behind it. 

Could you imagine if a governing body actually sat down and said to people in the US that they cannot have parties on the 4th of July, because they have determined that doing so doesn't celebrate the origins of the day properly?  Oh, I can't even picture that without laughing so hard I can't breathe. It would be the biggest spit in the face our government has ever seen if they even tried to state such, much less enforce it.  One giant country wide party would ensue...for certain.  

Ftr... No one is trying to tell YOU how to celebrate Valentine's day, or not to do so. It is, in fact, quite the opposite, you're telling everyone else that they're doing it wrong as defined by you. I won't tell you that you have to celebrate it the way everyone else does. Hell, even I don't celebrate it the way everyone else does, lol. But I do find it odd that you think you should get to, lol. 

Edited by Tari Landar
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On 2/18/2019 at 6:28 PM, Love Zhaoying said:

If we keep going back, we’ll be dancing around Stonehenge models.

 

 

 

2575633A-AE8C-47B5-8831-C09955C0D1C0.gif

I'm staying close to Stonehenge right now but the Internet isn't great here! ;)

 

 

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Obviously, Valentine's Day can be celebrated in any way that the celebrators see fit, or not at all.

Bradford does make a very good point though. It would be a pity if all it ever meant to people is a day to give nice cards to everyone. If that's what it's become to some people, then it is no longer in the nature of romance (the very reason for Valentine's Day), which is a shame because, for those people, any genuinely romantic statement is gone. Even so, valentine cards smack of romantic feelings, so giving them to everyone is rather silly, because the statement they make simply isn't true. Therefore, whilst agreeing that everyone can use Valentoine's Day as they see fit, I disagree with the 'all give all a card' idea, because the message the cards convey is actually false.

A friend of mine told me about her 13 year old son's experience this year. Three of the girls at school wanted him to be their valentine. That's what Valentine's Day is about, whether anonymous or not. It's about romatic thoughts and feelings. It's not about all-give-all a nice card today, so that nobody feels special to anyone and nobody is left out.

Edited by Phil Deakins
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I don't care what damn day it is, if I want to give five hundred people a card, anonymously or not, and it makes them smile, even for a mere second, I think it's great.  If that day happens to be Valentine's day..awesome. If it happens to be the first Monday in April, the last Saturday in July, or the Second Wednesday in November...just as awesome. 

If someone wants to tell me that's wrong, that I'm celebrating the day wrong, that's on them. I might just decide that grumpy gus probably needs a few cards his/her self though...

Choose your path wisely with me, I'm rather unpredictable. I have been known to send goldfish in a bag (by default, worn on the head, even worse, they're sculpty,  and I made them) to people. Then again, I don't limit my gift oddities to goldfish, either, appreciated or not :P 

 

I happen to be someone that is all for making others smile, in as many ways, and as many people at one time, as humanly possible. In a world so chock full of sadness, reasons to be sad, and just general gloom, sometimes, smiles are always welcome. I had originally typed something else here, but, it makes me sad-and could potentially make others sad too, and I neither need nor desire to be sad or make anyone else sad right this moment..but I can tell you it ends with me not giving one care if people approve of my methodologies for trying to spread smiles, on whatever day I so choose. That's not arrogant, or me getting into a pissing match over who is right or wrong, or anything like that. If you prefer other methods, that is great too, and I'm glad you have that choice.  I am just as glad that I do too, though :) 

Smiles are awesome, and they're often at their most awesome, when they're shared by many, no matter how fleeting they might be. 

 

 

 

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14 minutes ago, Tari Landar said:

I happen to be someone that is all for making others smile

Me too - literally. It's the way I intentionally live in RL. But the discussion wasn't about cards and other things on any day of the year, as you described. It was specifically about Valentine's Day, and doing something specifically for Valentine's Day, because it's Valentine's Day.

Edited by Phil Deakins

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On 2/16/2019 at 2:08 PM, Bradford Mint said:

Respect is fine, no problem there but I do have an issue with the notion that everyone is equal when they are not.

E.g. school sports days where "everyone is a winner", to avoid children being upset at losing. At some point in their life, these snowflakes will discover that there are others who are better at something than they are and no, they're not entitled to the same benefits.

But we digress somewhat :)

I too worked against and with competitors and it's healthy to do that, it serves to stretch yourself and innovate.

There's also a great deal of cowardice in today's society too, like people who hide behind empty profiles when they post "tough" things on forums.

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59 minutes ago, Phil Deakins said:

Me too - literally. It's the way I intentionally live in RL. But the discussion wasn't about cards and other things on any day of the year, as you described. It was specifically about Valentine's Day, and doing something specifically for Valentine's Day, because it's Valentine's Day.

 I maintain that even if it is Valentine's day, and someone is sharing smiles with others-in whatever form, to however many they wish- because it is Valentine's day, that's still a good thing. There is no universal right or wrong on this (imo), only individual interpretation and desire(s), both of which can be highly subjective.  I know a few folks who take the day super, super serious with their husbands/wives/SOs. I'm absolutely certain I can't, and don't, take the romance out of their day(s) by handing cards out to people, nor can I lessen the origin of the day, or how others celebrate it.  A bit absurd to insinuate anyone actually has that kind of ability, really ;) 

I discussed other days because I feel the same about all days as I do holidays, I don't differentiate the way some might-which was part of my point, obviously not made as clear as I thought. 

 

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6 hours ago, BelindaN said:

I'm staying close to Stonehenge right now but the Internet isn't great here! ;)

If I ever go back to Stonehenge, I'm gonna wear jeans. The last time I was there, the wind seemed to be glowing straight up out of the ground. I finally gave up trying to keep my skirt down and sat on the ground.

It wasn't Valentines day, but I probably gave someone "romantic" thoughts.

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3 hours ago, Theresa Tennyson said:

There's also a great deal of cowardice in today's society too, like people who hide behind empty profiles when they post "tough" things on forums.

"Tough" posts? Nope, just a perspective that's clearly sitting in the "too difficult" basket for some.

Let's all start giving each other chocolate coated footballs on Thanksgiving and wish everyone Happy Purple Day because traditions evolve apparently so this is a must. :)

Thanks for the reminder to add fantasy stuff to a profile, that would then allow me to "hide" behind a bunch of irrelevant nothing. I can't see the difference myself.

Anonymity is universal here regardless of the irrelevant fluff in most profiles that can be changed on a whim. Profiles mean nothing at all.

 

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1 hour ago, Madelaine McMasters said:

If I ever go back to Stonehenge, I'm gonna wear jeans. The last time I was there, the wind seemed to be glowing straight up out of the ground. I finally gave up trying to keep my skirt down and sat on the ground.

It wasn't Valentines day, but I probably gave someone "romantic" thoughts.

And walking boots! It's very muddy just now.....   

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7 hours ago, Phil Deakins said:

Obviously, Valentine's Day can be celebrated in any way that the celebrators see fit, or not at all.

Bradford does make a very good point though. It would be a pity if all it ever meant to people is a day to give nice cards to everyone. If that's what it's become to some people, then it is no longer in the nature of romance (the very reason for Valentine's Day), which is a shame because, for those people, any genuinely romantic statement is gone. Even so, valentine cards smack of romantic feelings, so giving them to everyone is rather silly, because the statement they make simply isn't true. Therefore, whilst agreeing that everyone can use Valentoine's Day as they see fit, I disagree with the 'all give all a card' idea, because the message the cards convey is actually false.

A friend of mine told me about her 13 year old son's experience this year. Three of the girls at school wanted him to be their valentine. That's what Valentine's Day is about, whether anonymous or not. It's about romatic thoughts and feelings. It's not about all-give-all a nice card today, so that nobody feels special to anyone and nobody is left out.

Valentine's Day cards for friends.

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2 hours ago, Bradford Mint said:

"Tough" posts? Nope, just a perspective that's clearly sitting in the "too difficult" basket for some.

Let's all start giving each other chocolate coated footballs on Thanksgiving and wish everyone Happy Purple Day because traditions evolve apparently so this is a must. :)

Thanks for the reminder to add fantasy stuff to a profile, that would then allow me to "hide" behind a bunch of irrelevant nothing. I can't see the difference myself.

Anonymity is universal here regardless of the irrelevant fluff in most profiles that can be changed on a whim. Profiles mean nothing at all.

 

Your superiority complex is showing.

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On 2/23/2019 at 7:23 AM, Bradford Mint said:

Well from my interpretation, to avoid anyone feeling left out, the plan was for everyone to give others a card.

Everyone else couldn't give a stuff about Valentine's Day, due to it being diluted to triviality.

You received few cards compared with others and wasted your time by putting too much thought and effort into the newly defined version of a tradition.

Result: The new "idea" to avoid someone feeling left out, ended up with you feeling hurt and left out, what a fantastic result that was.

Here's a new plan: Don't allow anyone to send or receive cards, that way nobody can feel left out our get hurt. Level the playing field! 

Google results describe my interpretation of Valentine's Day as the traditional one.  If I am not someone's Valentine, I don't want silly fake Happy wishes from them.

As to the poster who said I don't get to define holidays, nope, government decides public holidays, V day is not, in any country.

Bradford, is empathy not your strong suit or are you so wedded to your ideas about Valentine's Day that you can't muster any for a tiny five year old child who received a crystal clear message that she was being rejected by pretty much her entire class? Can you not understand how devastating an experience that was?

If you're going to stick to Just the facts maam, at least get them right. There weren't any rules or "plan" for everyone to get one in my class then. I didn't "waste" my time by putting thought and effort into it. And why are you giving that such a negative slant? Showing people they're special is what it's all about in your eyes, right? I was just doing it for each person, because each person was unique and mattered. It was important to me that my classmates received cards which suited their personalities. I kept putting in the care and effort as long as I was in a class which did some sort of card exchange, long after it became clear it wasn't going to be reciprocated. It was a small kindness and it mattered to me. I guess maybe I learned early that it's nice to give.

There's still room in all of that for special cards and gifts. Both ways of giving cards can sit side by side without any problems. It's not like classrooms of kids giving each other cards has led to adults doing the same thing in their workplaces, has it? But maybe a few more kids who had kind teachers like Pamela learned a little something about seeing what's good in each other. That's got to be worth doing.

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