Garnet Psaltery Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 (edited) 21 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said: Conquering to get the most goodies, yes I can't disagree. That's not the point you were making. You were talking about a 'conquering mentality' i.e. it being about power. Edited September 28, 2018 by Garnet Psaltery Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 Just now, Garnet Psaltery said: There has been evidence found of some women who were not appreciated in their time for their contribution to science and the arts, but you cannot extrapolate from that to a vast number. I didn't see the film you mention, as I can't get out, and if I were spending money in the cinema I'd rather it were on something I'd enjoy, such as sci-fi. I don't want to sit for hours being given a lecture. Well I'd give this extrapolation a run for its money..:) But this movie is not a lecturing movie at all, it is very entertaining and wildly inspirational what these women achieved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 1 minute ago, Garnet Psaltery said: 21 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said: Conquering to get the most goodies, yes I can't disagree. That's not the point you were making. You were talking about a 'conquering mentality'. A conquering mentality tries to hoard everything it can... Don't see your point.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garnet Psaltery Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 Just now, Luna Bliss said: Well I'd give this extrapolation a run for its money..:) But this movie is not a lecturing movie at all, it is very entertaining and wildly inspirational what these women achieved. Good gods, I really would not choose to see a film that claims to be 'inspiring'. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garnet Psaltery Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 1 minute ago, Luna Bliss said: A conquering mentality tries to hoard everything it can... Don't see your point.. No, that much is evident, and at this point I am taking myself out of this wildly veering and tedious topic. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 (edited) 2 minutes ago, Garnet Psaltery said: 3 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said: Well I'd give this extrapolation a run for its money..:) But this movie is not a lecturing movie at all, it is very entertaining and wildly inspirational what these women achieved. Good gods, I really would not choose to see a film that claims to be 'inspiring'. Really? Lots of black women were so inspired...being able to finally see themselves represented in History/Herstory. Edited September 28, 2018 by Luna Bliss Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solar Legion Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 More of the same old tactics it seems .... Some just never grow up. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Love Zhaoying Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 32 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said: Smudge stick, yay! Also: 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Love Zhaoying Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 Are we arguing about not arguing now? 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Love Zhaoying Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said: btw...did you see the movie 'Hidden Figures', about three black women who excelled in technology? I wish that I did see it! Those women were the literal “Computers” when my dad was working on the Mercury program! On that note, my computer class in 1983-1984 high school almost got to meet Rear Adm. Grace Hopper (but she broke a hip). (Coined the term “bug”.) 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 14 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said: 1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said: btw...did you see the movie 'Hidden Figures', about three black women who excelled in technology? I wish that I did see it! Those women were the literal “Computers” when my dad was working on the Mercury program! On that note, my computer class in 1983-1984 high school almost got to meet Rear Adm. Grace Hopper (but she broke a hip). (Coined the term “bug”.) Really? Did he speak of them? Wish you could have met Grace...so close.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Love Zhaoying Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 (edited) 2 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said: Really? Did he speak of them? He died before the movie or book came out. I suspect he knew the original “computers” were women, but he never mentioned it. He worked for McDonnell-Douglas, not NASA. Edited September 28, 2018 by Love Zhaoying 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 23 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said: Smudge stick, yay! प्रेम जवाब है 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drake1 Nightfire Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 2 hours ago, Luna Bliss said: If you read this thread carefully, you will see that Rya's solution to his difficulties at work were shot down hard, more so at first. This is because many did not accept that it's okay to be vulnerable and claimed he was being weak if he could not fix it. I believe we have a lot of societal pressure to 'pull oneself up by the bootstraps'....especially in the USA...and especially as it has grown more neoliberal with each passing year. It's not 'tone policing'.....macho behavior is destructive in society, and if so inclined I will always call it out when I see it. I never once shot down a damn thing Rya said.. Stating how the old forums were isn't being macho, it's cold hard facts. 90% of posts were harsh, cutting and down right nasty. I did enjoy watching some of them go back and forth for days. Its human nature. People slow down at car accidents. The news is packed with car accidents, shootings, drug overdoses, and the like. Death sells. Pain and suffering sells, because we breathe a sigh of relief that it isnt us. I have NEVER told anyone to "pull themselves up by the bootstraps" because it was said to me over and over as a child and teen. If someone needs actual help, i will steer them to it. But some idiot that "cheats" on their SL partner and then comes here to whine that they left him because he got caught? Hells no. Aside from the fact they are usually married in RL and the spouse knows nothing about it. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drake1 Nightfire Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 4 hours ago, Garnet Psaltery said: Good gods, I really would not choose to see a film that claims to be 'inspiring'. I prefer a good family movie myself, like Deadpool 2.. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rya Nitely Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 7 hours ago, Luna Bliss said: I see Rya's ability to ask for what he needed at work as a real strength. It takes great self-awareness to know your limits, and to respectfully ask for help when you need it. It takes courage, because you're often turned down and labeled as 'weak' -- just as so many posters in this thread tried to label Rya as weak. I see all the varied groups asking for their rights now as a very positive change in society. Women asking to have equal pay, authority, and respect in society. Men wanting to be able to express their tender side without being labeled as 'weak'. People of color asking for equal rights and respect. Gays wanting to be seen positively and deserving of the rights we give straight people. Mentally and physically challenged people getting the respect they deserve. The poor being lifted up. Really, the list goes on and on. The solution is not for these people to toughen up, but rather to change the nature of society. The warm blanket helps me. The funny thing is that the effects of my involvement in this thread carried over to work, and I started to become jumpy again, anxious. And I had to remind myself I'm in a safe place here. I've been wrapped in a warm blanket at work and I love it. I feel warmth from management, HR and the staff. I think HR see me as an amazing example of how the new policies are working. As I recover my smiles are getting bigger and they are reflected back at me. Some of the people I disliked most are now becoming my support group - how's that? I think it's because they also had issues and are now recovering through mindful meditation etc. I can handle these forums now, even though I was a little bit jumpy there for a bit. I don't understand the mentality of some people, but the warm blanket has made me stronger and I can now cope with people who prefer bluntness. As we head into spring downunder I am slowly starting to take the warm blanket off, knowing it's there for me whenever I need it, going forward. Thanks Luna, for your understanding 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madelaine McMasters Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 4 hours ago, Garnet Psaltery said: That will be because straight white males generally built your civilisation. (I have no numbers to demonstrate the ratio of straight to otherwise among them but by the statistics we have the straight would be in the majority). By all means do without the advantages that civilisation brought you (even granted its faults). If the balance of invention, creation, and foresight shifts then the default could change, of course. That sounds like a mix of the anthropic principle and survivor bias. I can easily imagine luck falling a little differently across Earth's time and space, resulting in modern civilization being built by (insert alternative to white males here). I think we underestimate the role luck plays in all we do. Obviously we got where we are via the path that brought us here. We'll never know if an alternative path would have produced a better here and now. We don't get to run this experiment twice. History can be our guide, but it needn't be our destiny. I do expect the future to bring a shift in the balance of invention, creation, and foresight... unexpectedly. 3 hours ago, Luna Bliss said: 3 hours ago, Blush Bravin said: Reading this definition, perhaps you need a better word to convey your message than macho. Perhaps a better word needs to be developed if there isn't one already. It's the word that was used in my Women's Studies classes to denote: "an exaggerated or exhilarating sense of power or strength" And that is the definition of 'macho' in one online dictionary, albiet not the first one. I do specify when I use it that I am referring to men and women equally. Should I go all psycho-babbly and describe what 'defenses' in Psychology are each time I use the word? It is a defense, after all, this tendency to display toughness in order to hide weakness. I read "macho" about as Luna does, and also apply it regardless of gender. To me it means puffing out your chest to hide a lack of confidence, self awareness, or awareness in general. An exhilarating sense of power or strength is not the same as having power or strength. To paraphrase Twain, that's the difference between the lightning-bug and lightning. Unfortunately, macho is often rewarded. I suppose people live vicariously though displays of it. 3 hours ago, Garnet Psaltery said: 3 hours ago, Luna Bliss said: But this movie is not a lecturing movie at all, it is very entertaining and wildly inspirational what these women achieved. Good gods, I really would not choose to see a film that claims to be 'inspiring'. It looks to me like it's Luna who claimed the film is inspiring. I quite agree. With no need for scare quotes, I found the movie inspiring. I often seek inspiration. I think seeking and providing it are two of the best things we do. 4 hours ago, Callum Meriman said: SL, and the forums, are very much female dominated. It's quite a polar opposite to the real world. Unless a substantial portion of the SL female population are males in RL! ;-). 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madelaine McMasters Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 1 minute ago, Rya Nitely said: The warm blanket helps me. ...sets you on fire. ;-). 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roxy Couturier Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 35 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said: ** I would agree the forum is different from RL in some ways, but it is also a microcosm of real life in some ways. The patriarchy is alive and well on this forum, evidenced by your inability (and a few others) to comprehend that there is also value in vulnerability, and also in your championing of the delight in bludgeoning others in the old iteration of the forum. The old iteration had its faults, but that didn't include healthy (and even spirited) debate. To paraphrase, twasn't aggression that killed the forae, twas adding passive to aggressive. 25 minutes ago, Blush Bravin said: Reading this definition, perhaps you need a better word to convey your message than macho. Luna calls it that to cast a negative spin on what is simply aggressive behaviors. Which is hilarious, since one of her modus operandi is to hammer away in a fairly aggressive manner and never ever backing down. Even, and especially, if there is a preponderance of evidence and argument that her position is incorrect or hurtful. All behaviors that one equates to a puffed up male ego or, dare I say, "macho". Now i want to listen to the Village People... 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rya Nitely Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 6 hours ago, Drake1 Nightfire said: There is no patriarchy here, no power struggle. Here, everyone is equal. Until they prove otherwise by their posts. But here you are talking from your own perspective. It's how you experience it. Do you believe a newbie would also experience it that way? I witness newbies given a hard time much more often than a well known forum member. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Callum Meriman Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 44 minutes ago, Madelaine McMasters said: Unless a substantial portion of the SL female population are males in RL! ;-). hehe, this is true, it's also true that a huge slice of males are females. Some of the much admired, and trend setting fashion lights of SL, in fact! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Callum Meriman Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 (edited) 7 minutes ago, Rya Nitely said: But here you are talking from your own perspective. It's how you experience it. Do you believe a newbie would also experience it that way? I witness newbies given a hard time much more often than a well known forum member. With respect, that's not patriachy Rya considering more often then the regular females are right there too. These pile ons are due to the poster. One recently in Merchants is an example, although sadly he deleted the initial few postings which were incredibly ranty and attacking LL from 100 different angles. Edited September 28, 2018 by Callum Meriman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rya Nitely Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 6 minutes ago, Callum Meriman said: With respect, that's not patriachy Rya considering more often then the regular females are right there too What are we talking about now? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ansiri Posted September 28, 2018 Share Posted September 28, 2018 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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