Tari Landar

I've personally seen ARs be effective. Are they always 100% effective? NO, nothing is. Not even reporting things in rl is always 100% effective. But there is one advantage we have online, that we don't have in rl. That is that we can get away (usually, most of the time even) and not have to see/read/hear that which we don't want to. Of course that's not always the case. But in rl, you can't mute people. You can't derender them. You can't put people on some magical blacklist(this really is a bad idea, no matter where you try it). Even a protection order isn't always going to guarantee someone stays away from you-and breaking those usually holds a legal penalty. But in sl, yeah, you can basically issue your own self an order of protection against those you wish to be away from-in most instances. You can't say ARs are ineffective simply because yours might have been. There may be many reasons as to why. You may not be taking all the precautions you possibly can. You may not have filed it correctly(hey, humans make mistakes, all of us). You may be dealing with someone who is just going to test every single boundary until none remain. Does it make their treatment right? Of course not. I'm not going to say "it's your fault, because you're not doing all you can to prevent it", but I will say that MOST people who complain are not doing all they can. Those truly hell bent on doing whatever they can to ruin the experience of another, will be determined and will likely stop at nothing. Most griefers don't fall under that umbrella though. Most fall somewhere below that, and they actually do have a threshold they won't cross. Unfortunately, sometimes you have to find out what that is before you can really make them go away. I will say that giving them more attention, is honestly what most of them want to begin with. All it will do is feed into their childish antics. It certainly won't make things better. You can mute people, you can derender them, you can make sure friends of yours also know what's going on in case they too get involved-that includes places you're a regular patron should that become an issue, you can follow all the proper AR procedures using the tools LL gives us, you can simply choose to ignore(a hard one, yes, but not impossible)...there really are a lot of things we can do to rid ourselves of people, places and things we wish to be rid of. That doesn't mean the AR process is always going to stop everyone, or everything. It's just not possible. It's entirely possible to have someone ARd, they get a temporary ban, and then come back either on their usual av or an alt-or they get someone else in their place. That's not unusual at all. If you want LL to be able to keep a hold on that type of person regardless of what account or computer they use, you're asking for too much. That's not a reasonable expectation. Not when, as I said, people who are hell bent on doing these things, can get around just about anything LL wants to throw at them. Especially if they aren't breaking any rl laws. Again, not condoning their behavior, just saying it's not as easy to stop as you might think. I'm not sticking up for griefers, far from it. I've seen people treated so badly they up and leave sl for good. I've seen one girl treated so badly she decided her life wasn't worth living(granted this began in sl, but escalated far beyond that). I won't condone what happened to her, or anyone-even the mildest form of griefing. But I also won't pretend everyone does everything they can possibly do, when they come across folks like that. There comes a time when we, as adults(because we all are, right?) have to say "enough is enough, I'm not going to let someone else ruin my day", and move on. Will it stop everything? No. I don't know how many times that needs to be said. There is NOTHING anyone, including LL, can do to stop everyone or even the majority of people. We have far more power in our own hands than we seem to think we do, though. ARs do work, about as often as their rl counterpart works. In the meantime, you've got to use whatever tools you have available to you, for yourself.(of course, without stooping down to the level of that which you're trying to fight). I would NEVER support some group, any group, having any sort of list, as suggested here. Humans make mistakes, humans are a judgmental species, and humans can be quite manipulative when we want to be. I don't want some other human judging whether or not I belong on some list, simply because I pissed off the wrong person, on the wrong day, under the wrong moon. If you think that couldn't possibly happen, you are fooling yourself. Groups like this have existed in sl for years, they do not work, and are often more problematic than the folks they stick on their little lists. It's another form of griefing, when you think about it. No better than the original act. It doesn't matter how vulnerable an adult, or even child, is. We still have all the same tools available to us and are expected to utilize them to the best of our ability. When that doesn't work, that's what the AR is for. If that still doesn't work you've got a choice to make. Either move on and make that which you dislike disappear from your sl, or move on from sl in general. Harsh? Maybe. Sometimes life decisions are harsh. A list(or group, whatever it is you want), is not and never will be, the answer. I can guarantee you that. That's like creating a wall of fame for griefers. Great way to stroke their ego, bad way to eliminate them.

Me, personally, I make money. Not always a ton, but my profits cover all inworld costs, allow for fun money inworld(for general hobbies, goofing off and whatnot), allow me to contribute to some very near and dear to me charities(rl ones), and also pay some rl expenses. Sometimes, all my rl expenses even, sometimes not though. I don't have a huge store-tiny in fact. But I also don't have a huge overhead, and can keep my actual business expenses at a minimum. I think part of why some don't make as much as they could is they just don't really try too hard. Not always a bad thing of course. Some people really don't want to pull out a profit. There are lots who really are in it just for the fun of doing it. That's actually where I stand. I'm in business because it's fun, and I enjoy it. The perk is that it also pays for itself. But I had my business long before it started paying for itself, lol. So that's not really the reason I do it. Just a nice side effect. I do think if someone truly wants to bring in a big profit, and works at it as hard as they can, as best they can, they can make it just fine. Some people close down shop for reasons other than financial. in fact I've seen tons close because they just didn't want to do it anymore, or couldn't. Rl changes will often affect our sl as well, so that too could play a part. Sometimes people get burnt out on what they're doing and need time off. I've seen loads of merchants come, go, then later come back with something totally different. I think that happens a lot. In fact one of my fav. stores from early on did that. Closed up shop and stayed gone for a while, then came back with something brand new(and a new brand, at that). Although the creator still makes clothing, it's a completely different style than it used to be, and primarily mesh now. I would say that most merchants I have seen, aren't in it for the big bucks. If they are, they're not doing the most stellar job. Sometimes the ones who make the big bucks, aren't doing a stellar job either, they simply have a product that overshadows their shortcomings.(that's not a bash on any creator, group of creators, or anything like that, just the blunt truth-I've realized it myself with some of my bigger sellers over the years, I definitely could have done better on some of those, and am lucky they sold as well as they did). I never look at the revenue made by a company as an indicator of it's success, or failure. Well, not in sl anyway. Because sometimes, it really is just dumb luck, be it good, or bad.

Madelaine McMasters wrote: I agree with this, even though I'm still contemplating my stance on free-will (I don't think it matters for this discussion). What is bothering me about this particular thread is the idea that we must be all inclusive or we'll miss out on something, and that the solution for disharmony is for those with thin skins to thicken it. It's been suggested to me by good friends that my ignoring bullying and griefing can, at times, appear as approval of it. By definition, they are correct. It is their observation. I counter with my usual argument that if they too ignore the bullying, they deprive the bully of his/her oxygen. That's true, but there are other sources of oxygen and it doesn't take long for the bullies to find them. So there's the dilemma. Do you just walk away from the bully and let those with thinner skins fend for themselves, with the belief that the school of hard knocks will whip them into shape? (I often do). Do you offer assistance to the victim of bullying, with the hope of helping them grow that thick skin faster? (I often do). Do you, without becoming a bully yourself, call out the bullying behavior? (This is the most difficult for me). I haven't got the answer, my friends and enemies alike will confirm that. But it does seem to me that blindly embracing everyone is not the answer. Discrimination is not an inherently bad thing. I definitely agree with some points, blindly accepting any and all things is no more the answer than standing up to each and every thing or person(well verbally standing up to, in many cases). That's why I said that we all do, and will, react when things bother us. That's just part of who we are. It's not so much the fact that we do react that puzzles me as much as how we react. That's where you can draw a line, if you're going to draw one anywhere that is, as to how far you can/will go with your reaction. The line that separates the receiver from the producer of the grief/harassment/bullying/whatever is going on, is an important one that we all too often cross because we simply feel that we have to react. I certainly don't have any direct answers either for every situation. But I do know what doesn't typically work, what sometimes works, and things that are hit and miss based on the situation at hand. I also know that a lot of people never learn from their own mistakes-which is why molehills turn into mountains and why griefers truly hell bent on creating problems continue to thrive. Because some people, somewhere, let them. Sometimes standing up, for yourself or another person, is your best option. But even in doing that, you can still come out ahead of the person you're standing up against. Reacting doesn't necessarily have to be a bad thing, or a sign that something has been ruined either. I'm not so certain that calling out another is always, or even mostly, the best option though. But it would depend entirely on the situation at hand, and how you go about doing it. Most times, such action would likely backfire before it would be even remotely helpful. There's a difference between standing up to a bully, and trying to put one in it's place, imo. Sometimes it might seem like a grand idea, in theory, but once brought to fruition-not so much. Most of what I see, read, hear, have dealt with, etc... all falls under the "is it really worth my effort to even care" umbrella, or my "would reacting openly, and addressing this issue/bully/griefer directly actually make things better", umbrella. If my answer is no then those are times when walking away is probably the best option. If you can't fix the problem by standing up to or confronting it directly it(without getting bent out of shape yourself of course), you're more likely to only fuel it, making it worse.

Please. What you're talking about would only apply if the person with "free will" had a perfect childhood, a perfect adulthood, spent a few years in talk therapy, had attained cosmic consciousness, and even then they'd probably still get upset if someone pooped on them. All of us get our feathers ruffled...and, your avatar bouncing around gives me a headache.  Sorry it's not letting me quote, that stupid error again.... There is a huge difference between getting upset, feathers ruffled, whatever you want to call it when another person says or does something...and allowing those feelings to actually direct how you feel about everything else around you, how you react and/or how you treat others. Of course everyone gets upset, dislikes things and even acts on things from an emotional standpoint. That's just part of our human nature, and not something I'd consider a character flaw, by far. But you can feel a certain way about something, yet still not necessarily act on those feelings. Like when I get upset, I don't have to tell everyone and their mother. I don't have to let what griefers, or even a general bully, get me down all the time. I can be so extremely frustrated, angry even, at someone or something, yet still not allow those particular feelings dictate how I am going to live the rest of my life that day/week/month/year/whatever. That's my point. Free will is the ability to make choices for ourselves. That includes how we react to others around us and what they choose to do with their free will. You don't have to have had perfect life, or any of the above things at all, to be able to deal with things, people or situations, like a mature adult. Of course no one is a mature adult at all times, we've all got our moments. I wouldn't ever suggest otherwise. But sometimes, some people, let things get to them way too much. Griefing is actually a prime example of that(even here on the forums). By that I mean, how people deal with those they determine are griefers. If you constantly take their bait-as many do-you're not doing anyone any sort of service, including yourself. Same goes for griefing elsewhere in life-because it's not something we can get rid of entirely. We can however change how we let it affect us. We can't change the choices others make, but we can change the choices we make. I don't need to have gone to therapy to know that allowing others to dictate how I should feel, or act, isn't a healthy way to look at things. It's going to happen, from time to time, but I surely don't make a habit of it, lol. At least, not anymore, I used to though. That's exactly why i know just how odd that sort of idea really is. The idea that others can really "ruin" an experience for me, that is. I don't have to let them ruin it. No one does. When it happens though, it's because we choose to let it happen.

Madelaine McMasters wrote: Tari, while I'm in general agreement with the idea that we can walk away from unpleasant people and their behavior, that doesn't always ensure happiness. I have watched some of my friends endure the aggravation of unpleasant characters here in the forums and feeds. They are, to varying degrees, able to weather the abuse by ignoring it. But, to the extent they cannot, my enjoyment of SL is diminished by their unhappiness. So it's not quite true that no one can ruin your experience unless you let them. While we can try to make the best of a situation, as long as we have empathy and friends, our happiness will be affected by others. For this reason, I do not advocate inclusiveness to the point of amorality. Sadly, it is sometimes necessary to walk away from people we like to avoid people we don't. I disagree entirely. Absolutely no other person can control your emotions, or your reactions, no matter what. It is entirely possible to have some of the worst things said, done, whatever, and still be able to walk away, head held high because you didn't allow that action or those words, get you down. Saying that's not possible is basically saying you have no free will. I don't believe people lack free will. It's a conscious choice to let what others say and do, affect you(negatively or positively). So you can always make the choice to allow things to only affect you in a positive way, and leave the rest behind, if you want to.Hard? Sure it is, at times. Impossible? Absolutely not. Although I never did say ignoring that which you dislike will ensure happiness, I think there's much more to happiness than just that, lol. I can guarantee that making different choices when it comes to how you will deal will offer up a different outcome. If we let everything others say and do, affect us negatively all of the time, we'd be a very unhappy species-generally speaking. My opinion on that matter doesn't change simply because this is sl. This is the same thing I tell others who have dealt with people who truly try their hardest to bring others down. Sometimes those people are successful, but it's only that way because their intended audience allows them to do that. I lost a friend a couple years ago to one such person. Her inability to realize that this person couldn't possibly ruin her life, if she didn't allow it, ended up being her literal demise in the end. I miss her terribly, and of course I don't support the way this man treated her, nor do I blame her or anything like that. But she could have walked away. She could have done a lot of things to change the outcome. It was her choice not to, and in the end it was her choice to deal with it in such a permanent way. Was I happy she was so miserable? Of course not. Did I let her unhappiness ruin my sl? Of course not. I can be sad, upset even, at what's happening to another and still not consider my sl ruined, lol. To say otherwise would mean she had complete control over me. That doesn't make a lick of sense. I would like to think that had I, and others, not been there from the word go, trying to help her realize she could just walk away from it, things would have ended even sooner. Our positive attitudes, had just as much of an effect on her, as her negative one had on us. Positivity should always win out, in the end. I find it tragic when it doesn't, and unfortunately that happens way too often. You can counteract the negative with a positive, you just have to put forth the effort to do so. We're all human though and we are often lead by emotion, which can be both a positive and negative thing. I still see no reason to give up our free will simply because others are choosing to utilize theirs with bad intentions.

Keli Kyrie wrote: Tari Landar wrote: Personally I'm not fond of any opinion that supports the thought that another person can actually "ruin" sl for someone,or any aspect of it. If that makes any sense at all. No one can ruin your experience, unless you let them. I live my Sl the way I choose to and believe others ought to be given that same opportunity. We each control our own sl, for our own self. If something, or someone, annoys me, sometimes I speak up and sometimes I simply walk away. It depends entirely on the situation at hand. I don't find it difficult to avoid the things I know I dislike, though. Or to, at least, pay them no mind when I do come across them. I don't really need to use mute, or give them more thought than I think they deserve. I don't sit and wish they were banned, or continue mulling over whatever it was that happened. It is what it is. But that's just me. Very good points Tari and I wish more people would handle things the way you do. But what do we do when these different people come together in the Forum? There is no mute button here and the Dragons, Trolls, and Vampires (virtual and metaphors) have just as much right to be here as the rest of us. How do we react when we can't walk away? You can walk away, you can always walk away. You don't have to react to everything and the thought process that drives people to that conclusion is one of the very things I avoid like the plague. It's also something I don't fully understand. Why do you feel you have to do(or say, or deal, whatever) anything at all? Even acknolwedging they exist is likely giving them more thought than they probably deserve at that time-if they truly are attempting to "ruin" an experience for others. That's a general you, of course. I just don't see any real reason to worry about it, at all. Everyone has every right to be here and provided we stick within the rules we're given, we all have a right to say and do as we please(here being inworld, forums and such). There are lots of things people say, and do, that others are going to dislike-greatly even. How we react to someone, or something is not dependent upon that person(or thing/situation), it's dependent entirely upon us. We don't have to do anything, though. Doing nothing is just usually way better than what most choose to do.

Personally I'm not fond of any opinion that supports the thought that another person can actually "ruin" sl for someone,or any aspect of it. If that makes any sense at all. No one can ruin your experience, unless you let them. I live my Sl the way I choose to and believe others ought to be given that same opportunity. We each control our own sl, for our own self. If something, or someone, annoys me, sometimes I speak up and sometimes I simply walk away. It depends entirely on the situation at hand. I don't find it difficult to avoid the things I know I dislike, though. Or to, at least, pay them no mind when I do come across them. I don't really need to use mute, or give them more thought than I think they deserve. I don't sit and wish they were banned, or continue mulling over whatever it was that happened. It is what it is. But that's just me.

The ability to moderate the ability to chat in a group has been around since long before V3 came to be. It's been out some years now.(I don't know how many, but at least the last 3, that I know of-I started using it over 3 years ago in one particular group, just never paid attention to it before then). That's actually the easiest way. Creating a new role specifically for chat works too, but whether or not it's effective depends heavily on the kind of group, rate of new members and whether or not there is always someone online to add new folks to that role..and double all of that if it's a very active group. You could be creating more work for yourself with this method. I just disable chat priviledges for people who can't behave. I've only had to leave it permanently on for one person in the last 3+ years though. Kicking them out of the group doesn't really work unless you require a hefty membership fee or don't have open enrollment at all(but again you run into the problem of someone needing to be on to invite them, should someone want to join, etc.. etc..). People just keep coming back, otherwise.

I stand rather middle of the ground on this matter. I don't much care what others choose to do, such as paying customers with some sort of incentive, to leave a review. That's their business, not mine. If they think it's working for them, all the more power to them. Me, I don't do it. I don't find a need to and don't personally think it holds much value to even bother. I'd rather my reviews come from people that actually want to leave them of their own accord. There was a time when reviews meant a little more. Now, they don't mean squat. Even before when all people really had to do, was rate with stars and they didn't need to leave a text review, the ratings held more water with more people. But these days, I don't believe it's the same. Which sometimes seems a bit odd, given that in order to leave a review now you do have to leave a name and some form of text in the pretty little box. You would think the reviews would mean more to people, right? But really, I don't believe they do. Then again I am one of those people that thinks the entire rating system they have is stupid and either needs done away with entirely(not my number one choice) or completely overhauled(my number one choice). This way when a customer sees those reviews and ratings they might actually believe what they s and won't wonder if it was artificial(in a sense).

Can't quote at the moment, keep getting a weird error... but, anyway. I'm not real certain what you read in my message. But I wasn't angry about anything that was done. I'm well aware of what not having auto return on and allowing others to rez on my land leaves open. I'm also well aware that, at times, I may have to deal with someone deciding to take advantage of that fact. Though it's a pretty rare occurance these days. It was simply a shared story, nothing more, nothing less. Not some giant tirade about "zomg he stoles my land, and stuff". Nope, I'm not that person, not in the least. There are some folks who don't understand how things "typically" work(I say typically because, well, there's not really a written manual on what we can and cannot do, in all scenarios on all land, at all times, etc.. etc...) I'm more than happy to help them learn. There are also others out there who are well aware, and will still touch the hot stove after getting burnt, simply because they can. I'm more than happy to help them learn too. There are very few instances that will shut off my willingness to help someone learn. It just so happened this gentleman decided to cross that line. I've had plenty of other experiences in the past with people rezzing on my land(aside from simply opening things or checking them out, lol), not necessarily realizing what they were doing, or heck even realizing it and not necessarily caring at the moment, that have gone much much more smooth(fun even). This was merely one incident, and not really all that huge of a deal. Not something I'd get my panties in a wad over, for sure. I do use the settings available to me, when I find appropriate. I just don't always use them all 24/7, and have actually never had any reason to. Most people are pretty darn cool actually, reasonable, don't misuse the permissions given-even if given the opportunity, and even if they do overstep(perhaps slightly so) have no qualms fixing any errors. I run across very few who behave otherwise these days. Sometimes, when it does happen, it's pretty amusing to me. Like in this case. But then I am patient as the day is long so, that likely has a lot more to do with it than anything else. I wouldn't recommend my choices or methods to others. I do what works for me, and I tell others to do whatever works for them.

My sl has morphed over the years. Currently my sl is pure fun. I come in sl to have fun, to work, to spend time with hubby and to help other folks. I do a lot of builds for various charities which I find very fulfilling because some of these charities I can't help as I'd like to in rl. (rfl being my top priority 4 months out of the year, except this year, making me a very sad panda, people don't like it when you're not on a team apparently, lol) .I used to spend more time with friends but over the years we've pretty much gone our separate ways. Such is life, right? I do spend time chatting with other folks too, don't get me wrong, just not with the people I used to be very close with-family even. I don't have a really big business, and I'm not so certain I'd want one. I don't even have a specific kind of business, lol. What I have now works fantastic for me, does exactly what I need it to do, makes me money(ie, pays for itself), and serves all kinds of purposes I'd never imagined it could, or would. Even when I'm working, it's still fun. I'm always sharpening my skills on things to. I guess actually liking what I do has a huge impact on how I view my "business side" as it were, lol. I do sometimes wander the grid as well, but not nearly as often as I used to. I'm not into the club scene. Usually my sl hours are spent working on projects for other people more than anything though. There's just something about creating something and knowing the recipient really likes it that gives me goosebumps. I know, it's probably weird, and a bit sappy, but I really do enjoy it a lot. Creating for only myself isn't nearly as much fun. Plus, I really love the challenge. Over time, things get more and more difficult for me and it will only get worse(some days better than others) so being able to do something and have it come out more than just "alright" makes me feel pretty good. I'm legally blind, and have some other issues thanks to scar tissue on my brain so most things get made a LOT before I'd ever let anyone else see them because I make a TON of mistakes while making them, lol. Occasionally, I still screw up and some kind soul helps me out and lets me know something isn't quite aligned, or a texture is a little off, etc... So, always sharpening my skills. If for no other reason, to benefit my own health and well being. It keeps me sharp. Hubby and I don't really do a whole lot on sl anymore. We do build together, dance, and cuddle, but we do that at home and it's pretty much just our avs acting out what we're doing in rl, lol. Hard to explain that one I suppose. But we watch movies and tv, spend time together, cuddle and such every night and while we do our avs are usually logged inworld cuddling on the only furniture in the house-a rug. At least until the region restarts and kicks us off(does once a day, usually, early morning hours while we're still logged in). I really love this aspect a lot, but can't explain why to be honest. I just do. It's not really necessary, obviously, since there's the whole rl aspect, but we both still love it.

Scout Schwager wrote: Yes, well I am not new at adjusting poses. I've been working with MLPV2 for 3 years, programming up dozens of different beds and other items, I seldome need the position information, I work it up myself with the tool included with MLPV. I suspect, don't know, but I believe these independent customer service agents also have the tools to set the positions for dancing animations, but Intan will not share that down to the cutomers. The agents have a revenue stream 'loading' dances in these balls so their is no motivation to share a "how-to". Yes a company in Indonesia is an issue, I have a lot of issues with non English-speaking programmers and the subesquent lack of good instructions. The market in SL is primarily English-speaking. I've looked at that TIS Hybrid Dance Machine that was mentioned above, They replied to some questions I had. They have a different approach, maybe not all great, but I am going to try it out, and post more later. OK and for web site owners. The copyright at the bottom of the page. In 2008, you put "Copyright 2008 yada yada.com". In 2009, you put "Copyright 2008-2009" etc. Otherwise folks will think you are asleep at the wheel. Your suspicions are completely unfounded. I have been using intan for quite some time now(if were' boasting about our experience with various systems, I've been working witht he very one you're comparing it to, for even longer than 3 years as well, but I see no need for that sort of information to be added). You were, and are, clearly biased from the word go. I have had absolutely nothing but the best of service from intan, ALL of their staff, and even other members in their group chat. I have watched people literally write the position cards for people(both staff, and other members) right there, on the spot, at no charge. It happens ALL the time. They are evry helpful should an issue occur. You quite clearly have something against people not from the US and/or those who don't have English as a first language. That is 100% YOUR problem. Saying it out loud, in a public(international I might add) forum, makes you come across terribly. It doesn't speak well for you at all. You shouldn't assume things the way you do about people simply because they aren't from your preferred country or speak your preferred language. Then again, you have every right to be as, well, judgmental, as you'd like to be, I suppose. So have at it. But I have to say, reading that makes almost everything you've had to say seem more like sour grapes on your part about something either unrelated, or buyer's remorse, or some other stupid nonsense. Intan doesn't have to "share" anything down to the customers. People can, and DO make their own position notecards all the dang time. Try actually spending some time doing it yourself instead of complaining about how difficult it is. Since you want to boast about your skills, it should require very little work on your part. Better yet, create your own system and then you won't have to worry about anything at all. I don't know why you find it a bad thing for someone to charge money for a service, such as creating the position notecards for people. Do you expect everyone to do it for free? Seriously? What then exactly are these people supposed to be doing at their "jobs" and getting paid for? It's quite clear you've got absolutely no business sense whatsoever. Try joining the group inworld, your eyes might be opened just a tad. Maybe you'll see that their staff, and company, isn't nearly as bad as you wrongly assumed. (fair warning, that chat can get busy, or at least, used to). There is always someone around who can and will help, should an issue arise, though. As for the website, while I agree keeping the date current ought to actually happen, it's not that huge of a deal to me. It's certainly not a deal breaker and certainly not indicator of anything other than someone didn't pay very good attention to that part. But then I guess it could be that they've been busier making products inworld, creating all these notecards you, and the rest of us, will surely need when the creators haven't been able to provide them and such. It's a pretty insignificant piece of information for me, personally. I wouldn't get hung up on it, nor would I make any sort of assumptions about them based on it. It's not their fault you assumed they weren't at the wheel. That's entirely on you. It seems more and more you didn't even actually try to read the information that came with your intan, read the website, or get any sort of assistance at all. Which leads me to a previous statement that your entire complaint is based entirely off some other nonsensical thing that has nothing at all to do with the performance of the product, or company. I'm all for people being held accountable and poor functionality being called out when/where needed. But this...doesn't fit that bill at all.

Pussycat Catnap wrote: Tari Landar wrote: He had no issues at all telling me about his grand idea to set up home there when he saw I had "all these great prims going unused" (I had 154-ish). Then he decided to invite some friends over, and seeing the "furniture and stuff you have"(aka the eh hem, rug, and intan ball in my otherwise empty home)" thought it would be great to throw our own orgy. He told me he thought as long as the land had room and prims, people are free to set up home anywhere they want and do whatever they want. ALWAYS set an auto-return. Nah, I don't like it I use it when necessary, but prefer to not have it on at all times. I have my reasons

Hippie, I can completely sympathize. Having just a few days ago dealt with a person quite similar(though not a female, and not a noob). I don't rent land. I do occasionally allow friends to use my land. A few days ago someone was in the store doing a hunt, and I happened to be there checking on something(a dino glitched and apparently was rocking itself off kilter, still don't know how, but, thats a different story). We got to talking and he decided to open some packages and was quite pleased that he could. Well yeah, I don't really prevent that. I expect that most use common sense(and really, most do, I don't let the bad apples spoil the bunch). We chatted a bit more and then I had other things to do so I parted ways while he continued opening packages, cleaning up after himself as he went(cool, another one with common sense). Roughly 12 hours later I come home and said gentleman has made himself a home about 10 meters above my home(ftr. my store is 300m in the sky, my home is on ground level). He took all but two prims and was having himself a quaint little get together. A quaint little adult sleepover is more like it, a very vocal one, in local chat. Now not only has he decided to, well abuse the ability to rez objects, but he's decided to squat on what he KNOWS is not abandoned land. Scratch head I IM him, ask him how his evening is going, if his little shin dig is going well. Mind you this sim already has a club on it, and has it's own issues with lag and whatnot occasionally from that. My store does not get a ton of traffic, barring hunts of course, so I don't usually use even my own fair share of resources. But I did very much worry this gentleman alone was using the entire sim's worth of resources. Something I'm used to others doing, but not something I'd ever do.(still bothers me to even think of what sort of footprint he was leaving during the time I was away to be honest, I don't like disturbing others, or using more than my fair share, at all). He had no issues at all telling me about his grand idea to set up home there when he saw I had "all these great prims going unused" (I had 154-ish). Then he decided to invite some friends over, and seeing the "furniture and stuff you have"(aka the eh hem, rug, and intan ball in my otherwise empty home)" thought it would be great to throw our own orgy. He told me he thought as long as the land had room and prims, people are free to set up home anywhere they want and do whatever they want. Hmm, now I could have gone any number of ways with this. I went this way though. I asked him, politely, to please keep the vocal levels(as in actual voice, which frankly sounded worse than low budget porn), and local chat down. I let him know he had one hour to wrap up his little sleepover, and that I would greatly appreciate it if he'd make certain all of his stuff was picked up at the end of one hour. Because this is not just my business, but also my home, and not just an open invitation to all. I apologized if that was the impression he got, though. He still decided that wasn't good enough, went off on me like, well I don't even know what to call it, started trying to rez even more stuff(which he didn't realize was throwing his own stuff back at him, not mine) and throwing a literal temper tantrum verbally and physically. It was actually somewhat funny to watch. I tried to explain that his views on how things are supposed to be, are way off, and I tried to explain it as if he was a noob, despite the fact that he's a good few years old. Didn't work, he wanted to hear none of it. Eventually I banned, muted, returned, you get the picture. I have since had to ban a few of his guests, which actually saddens me, I can count on one hand the number of people I've had to ban over the years before now Some people truly do feel entitled to do whatever the heck they want, wherever they want to. This guy could very well have simply been a jerk, playing some kind of joke, or really that clueless, I don't know. Frankly, I don't care, either. I was quite nice, and gave ample opportunity, I thought anyway, but such is life, right? You can't educate them all. I'm all for trying, but sometimes, you really gotta know when to fold them.

Not getting into all the other shpeals or sharing my $0.02 on the whole bloodlines....but... a blood doll is basically just someone they feed off of on a regular basis, ie their "nourishment" aka "soul", it wasn't an unfinished sentence, though it's not one typically used anymore I don't think (I haven't seen that used in some time actually) carry on

JimmyCorrigan wrote: Is it really possible to have a civil war? Jimmy, again. Extremely, have you never had a marshmallow war? So exciting...and yet still civil.

Lucinda Bulloch wrote: It is called adapt to survive, they need them for the malls, but the mall owners will go by sales, as bots drive people away, example I went to phils store and only saw sex bots there to try out beds, so after throwing up in the sick bag which he didn't provide I tped out. That's a pretty low jab at another creator, actually.(and as a personal aside, it doesn't speak well for you, no, that's not me conforming to some "everyone is told to hate you" mentality, lol, I rarely hate anyone, I'm just not keen on underhanded moves like that) Those kind of "bots" are actually agents, and serve a purpose that has nothing at all to do with traffic. In fact, I'm pretty certain they don't even register in the traffic counts-at least most of them anyway. You can register bots with sl. I used to have a couple of registered bots with LL back when camping was more widespread and a-ok(but they weren't for gaining traffic-registered bots don't count in traffic, they were there to answer questions, when I was offline). There are stores that use bots, or agents, of some sort for legitimate purposes. Increasing traffic, in my personal opinion, is not a legitimate purpose these days, though I know many disagree. I know there are a LOT of clubs that use bots and alts. In fact, on in particular is actually only high on the search results(and has been for a couple of years) because each staff member has at least three avs there at all times. Eh, what can you do? It's not something LL will do anything about, so I prefer to simply allow my feet to do my talking. I don't patronize those places. I used to have a friend who loved them, swore they were "super popular", :always had people", until she realized 90% of those people are actually the same couple of people. Then she was a bit bummed, lol. I told you so, didn't seem so appropriate, so I pointed her to places that don't use such tactics and now she's content again. There really isn't much you can do. You can AR til you're blue in the face, but LL won't do anything at all about it. Better off simply not patronizing, and using word of mouth. It is, after all, the absolute best advertising tool ever and flows faster than the speed of light

Actually this week's been about normal. Until today, today's been extremely slow, terrible even. That's not usual for me. Not that I have some huge list or amount of products but Fridays have been pretty consistent for some time now. Today, not so much. Who knows why, lol. I don't even bother trying to figure it out.

Hahahaha, that JIRA is actually hilarious. Well, more like the responses to it that is. I have owned quite a few domains over the years and it's not at all unusual for them to not show up as being renewed until the 11th hour, or even beyond. In fact I owned one site that for almost a week said it was not renewed and was availabe, when in fact it was renewed(auto rewnew done yearly-which is not unusual at all). That was proven when someone(a competitor in that market at the time) attempted to purchase the domain and was unable to, and got angry, lol.

Raising an issue is one thing. Being increasingly aggressive, confrontational, and rude is an entirely different thing. It doesn't matter if others are doing so to him, or I should say if it seems like that are. Two wrongs don't make a right. I think lots of great advice has been offered and at some point one would have to weigh the pros and cons of continuing to debate something that is, obviously, at this point causing more of a backfire effect. It doesn't matter how nice or good of a person the OP is. Perception is everything, and first impressions say a lot. Much the same that those who ban for no reason are likely giving a bad impression....so would someone who makes an issue into more than it really is. Or rather, tries to make others believe it's more than it is. What's super important to some, is not so to everyone. Definitely not worthy of an argument in which one would get defensive. I'm thinking this one falls into that category. I don't think there have been too many people that said, the issue is perfectly fine and dandy. In fact it seems to me most people said it sucks, and there isn't a whole lot you can do but let your feet do your talking. But responding in this manner, isn't going to get the result you believe it will. Nor will it change the minds of others. Maybe if the approach were less abrasive and aggessive, the outcome may have been a bit different. I don't think there is much that can be said to change how folks perceive you once they believe you've dropped off the dramatic cliff on something, lol. Hey, everyone does it at some point in their lives, we just need to figure out when enough is enough and walking away is probably the better option. Not shutting up, and refusing to share your thoughts, but walking away from the argument... the two aren't mutually exclusive, lol.

I agree that it sucks to be banned from places without seemingly any cause. It happens a lot. It really sucks and can leave a very sour taste in your mouth. Everyone has the right to complain about whatever they want to complain about too. So I won't tell you not to complain. But I will say that *continuing to complain doesn't always bring about change, or at least not the expected one. Sometimes it does, and sometimes it's extremely effective. But other times, it's really not. The times when it's not, it's typically because of the *way someone complains or how they address the issue, how they word that which they're choosing to say...things like this. It does make a difference when you use some of the statements you have. You may not think so, but others clearly do. There is a huge difference between saying you dislike something terribly, and stating exactly why you do...and comparing that thing to something along the lines of terrorism. There just is a difference. I'm sorry others couldn't point that out to you more clearly. But for some, that sort of comparison is actually pretty darn offensive, since the two aren't even on the same playing field. I do understand your frustrations, in fact I am willing to bet most people do, on some level. But you have to look at things from not only your own perspective. Especially when you're making your opinions known on a public forum where opinions and experiences are going to be as vastly different as the participants themselves. Personally, I tend to offer a heck of a lot more room for emotional complaints, which is what I honestly believe yours is. Not that this is a bad thing. But your complaint is quite clearly very emotionally driven. You seem very disturbed by this sort of action-again not a bad thing. I think it might be best to take some time, calm yourself(not saying you're out of control or something) and think on things before responding back. Some of your responses are getting more and more aggressive which is the exact opposite of the response you want from others. If you want others to respond in kind, then you must first set the precedent. As far as the issue is concerned, while it does suck, and you are free to be as angry as you want, i want to ask you to sit back and think real hard before answering these questions(you don't have to actually answer them here to us, lol). What exactly are you out(as in, what is being taken from you) by not being able to participate in any activity that might take place on this sim? I know, the hunts you, or your partner that is will not be able to participate in. But other than that, what is the damage being done? Is it worth more than a simple complaint of frustration-hoping to get other merchants to realize their actions have an effect? Is it worth others thinking you might be a little more than they can handle, and thus having a backfire effect(because this is extremely possible, given the responses thus far). Is it really worth getting that frustrated over, when there are hundreds if not thousands of other hunts, other sims and other merchants willing to welcome you with open arms? I honestly don't think it's worth it, for you, or anyone. I think that while it's good to say your peace(or is it piece? hmmm), important even, sometimes you really need to leave it at that and not continue on with an argument that leaves you and readers flustered. Because in the end, those merchants are losing out, but so are you. You could be just as easily losing customers as they are. Some issues just aren't worth it. Some are, of course, but this one isn't likely to be that kind of issue. It isn't likely to get too much better than we already see. And aside from an initial complaint, our absolute best defense against actions we don't like, is to not support those who make such actions. Let your feet do the talking, as they say. Eventually if what they are doing is really that bad, wrong, or ineffective they will either change their ways or go by the wayside with the countless others. In the end, you still win, you're still the better person(or at least can think of yourself as such) because you didn't stoop to a level that put you down in the same place. Your actions(words in this case) may be different, but the effects they have on others, might not be so different. Yeah, long winded, just thought I'd explain it and clarify so I don't have to come back and do so again

Eileen Fellstein wrote: I was always glad that the last names were somewhat removed from a similar popular real life name in most cases. I know some will disagree or just not care, but I still consider it ill advised for people to use their real life last names in PC activities like this. Actually, I don't think that's the case for a LOT of the legacy names. Some are pretty far removed, but I think at some point they got lazy and just started using popular last names they knew, lol. One that is quite popular in SL happens to actually be my rl last name(no not the one I chose, lol), and it's an extremely popular last name in rl too. I used to come across legacy names a lot that I've run into in rl too. Now we're likely to see less, since the legacies are a dying breed...sniffle...

I'm a profile perv too. I love to read them. Though I don't update mine very often, not like I used to. In fact I haven't updated it since November-ish(hubby is even worse at updating, most of his sits unchanged for years, lol). I still love reading other profiles. Some people put some pretty profound stuff in there. Some put some pretty funny stuff. Some are funny when trying to be serious, or are to me anyway. Some are super serious too. I just enjoy reading them. Granted I use a viewer that shows me the profiles the way I've always seen them. Not the goofy web based ones, I don't like those, they're kinda annoying. But the regular old V1 profile boxes on the screen, I like. I've found all kinds of great places, groups and even people simply by reading profiles. Never know what you can learn in sl, I say.

I logged on both yesterday and today to some pretty nasty messages from what I can only presume are pretty stupid people. An item I make was showing up under that "promotion", except that I did not(nor will I) use that keyword. It's not an item from the 60's or 70's and in fact does not fit that style, whatsoever. It does however have the word mad in in, several times. Because that's what it is, a :"mad" item. But apparently rather than actually CHECKING my keywords to see if I have, indeed, flubbed up and am wrongly advertising something as something it is not, people assumed. Then they felt the need to contact me directly. One can only assume they probably(at least some, perhaps) also flagged the listing. The listing is still there. Not showing up under the keyword anymore, I don't think. I'd have to go check it again. It's entirely possible, given the way things are going, that not everything there on that promotion is actually using that keyword but rather the system is screwing up somewhere along the line and putting relevence where it doesn't exist. That's not a bash of LL or anything like that. Simply me saying that I doubt my listing is alone. Surely I'm not worthy of some of the comments I've seen(and gotten, lol) because of an odd glitch that puts my listing where I never put it to begin with.

Verena Vuckovic wrote: That is the RL equivalent of someone pretending they are not on planet Earth ! Frankly......whoever thought up this ludicrous and farcical ability probably isn't. Actually it's more the rl equivalent of simply not answering your phone, or your door, because you just don't want to. But that sort of reply kinda gives us a glimpse into exactly why some folks might want to "hide" from others, even if not truly busy. I'd hide from people that treated me like a possession, as if they have a right to know where I am at all times, too. If I didn't "need" to have them on my contacts list, I'd simply remove them-for that alone. But then not everyone on my friends list is a close friend. Some are merely contacts. Though I do have close friends on it too. I can't imagine any of them getting butthurt at the fact that, occasionally, I am "offline" to them, even if I am actually not. They also don't care what my reason(s) might happen to be. That is a sign of a good friend, imo. Them needing to know where I am all the time.. nah, that's a bit too busybody for my liking and a bit too controlling. My friends are, also, occasionally offline to me, and others. I don't take it as some personal jab or something. I don't own them, they don't own me, we don't spend 24/7 together either, so why the need to know where each other is at all times? Yeah I don't get it, I guess, lol. It just screams needy. While I may be a tad obsessive about some things, compulsive even about others, that one-being uber needy-is something I let go of long ago. Even my own children know the importance of having your own space when you need it