Ren Toxx

My only feeling when that happens is, ‘hmm, the orb seems to be taking its jolly good time to do its thing’. I wouldn’t describe it as a feeling, though. More of a clinical curiosity.

Vasily Arkhipov, the man who averted a probable nuclear war in ’62. Had he gone along, we may not be speaking right now.

I already do. And of course I make myself carry all the shopping bags whilst asking myself ‘do you think this looks good on me, honey?’, then proceeding to ignore my own answers and do whatever I please.

There’s lovable ‘deads’... just sayin’

In other words... to agree with you. If we don’t, you’re all but saying we don’t have a right to express it. That’s not how forums work. You will get people who agree with you about that sim’s awesomeness and say so, and nothing we’re saying prevents them from doing it. It’s not preventing you from doing it, either: just because we don’t necessarily agree, shouldn’t make you feel like your opinion is less worthy (or compel you to try the known tactic of painting any disagreement as as a “mean personal attack”). It’s just that, by trying to convince us that everyone who didn’t like the sim enough to support it should stay silent, you’re not actually helping your case. People don’t usually take well an “agree with me, or shut up”. Anyway, we’re not actually talking of whether the sim in question is nice or not. What we’re generally debating is the underlying issue that not all regions who some people like, can and should be subsidized by LL. I already told you that it wouldn’t be a sustainable business if they were expected to do so. Because servers don’t run out of thin air. Someone has to pay for their maintenance, power consumption, broadband usage, software updates, etc., or they will quite simply not run. Since someone has to pay for them, you have to give them a really good reason. And so you did: you said you like it. Good. All I’m saying is, don’t take it so personally if others have a different taste, or want to comment on the underlying practical issues. We’re not trying to bring you down, precisely because several of us didn’t even know the sim, so we couldn’t possibly have a reason to do so. We’re just trying to do the same thing you did: share our opinion. Just because it’s different doesn’t mean we’re not allowed to share it. It’s a public forum.

No. As I said, I never heard of it. I could’ve found it amazing... or not; no telling what people like. I like certain regions—which, in turn, you may have never heard of, or would’ve liked—, and I support these personally, out of my pocket and time. I think they’re a selling point for SL as well. I would not, however, submit that LL should pay for them or else be in the wrong; that would be in the realm of wishful thinking—which, again, doesn’t actually put the money where it needs to go.

Not irrelevant. LL can’t commit to subsidize every region some people like (I myself never heard of it); sure, nice ones can be argued to be a selling factor for SL as a whole. But if we took the argument to the extreme, few region owners would want to pay. SL needs to remain a viable business, Linden Lab can’t pay all the servers and stuff out of their own pockets. Therefore, Alwin’s suggestion of user donations is also relevant. If enough do it, the region itself remains viable too; if not—or if most otherwise appreciative users still prefer someone else to pay—, we’re back to reality: some will go away.

Daily. For the giggles.

People TPing into your home.

That’s like covering the pack of cigarettes with a handkerchief, so you won’t see it. Yeah, you won’t, but it’s still there, and you’re still addicted. Analyze what stresses you in SL. Too many crappy friends? Be more selective, remove the bad ones, and either weather the storm or mute them. Shopaholism? Stop to actually ask yourself what stuff you need, as in “it will really improve my SL experience”, and what you don’t (the usual “just in case”, or “cos cute, tho I have no Earthly idea when—if ever—I’ll actually use it”). And so on and so forth. Either way, find out what it is. Stress doesn’t come out of nowhere. Also, you say that you keep logging back. While addictions can be sneakier, there’s still something you get out of it—and it’s not stress. So what is it? Whatever it is, focus more on it. Friends with which to laugh & have fun? Keep on it. In fact, stop whatever’s stressing you and use the time to find more friends like that. And sure, if you find out there’s nothing you actually enjoy of SL, quit. You wouldn’t even need to be stressed about it, it’s enough that you’re not enjoying it either. I don’t enjoy chess, so I don’t play chess. I’m just saying, attack the cause, not the symptoms 😉

Probably. I tend to hang out in voice-enabled areas, where I know the average opinion on this is visibly different; but then again, because they’re voice-enabled, they’re going to attract people with their own leaning for voice. Still, overall and based on going around places that just happen to have it enabled (rather than it being a defining trait of the place), yes, the average in-world take on voice doesn’t seem quite as much “against” as this. Maybe, but it’d be very mild. I have a vague impression that younger people can be less patient about texting (either typing themselves, and especially if the conversation consists of more than “hru?” and “lol”; or reading what others type).

’nuff said, generally. One other thing I don’t like of many voicers is that they tend to be exclusivists, without even realizing (or admitting) it—so they’re not compelled to try and moderate themselves in that sense: once they find someone else to voice with, they will mostly ignore anyone who texts, no matter if it’s in the same conversation. Even if voicing technically leaves you freer to look at the screen and see what’s going on, they still tend to develop a kind of ‘tunnel vision’ and ignore anyone who won’t voice. Alas, some go as far as resenting it if most or all people in a voice-enabled area choose to text anyway, for their own individual and perfectly valid reasons. If you point out that “voice is an option, not an obligation”, they’ll say, ‘sure, sure, I understand that‘. But they don’t, not really—they will keep questioning it, pressuring others to shift to voice, grumbling about it. Not actually tolerating it, despite assurances to the contrary. I have some friends I constantly text to while they voice to me, and I have no more problem with their voicing than they do with my texting. All it takes is accepting others’ preferences, hard as that seems to be for some.

Or, we start telling them, just to enjoy seeing them shuffling their feet uncomfortably, desperately trying to decide whether to join in, or to avoid it like the minefield that it is, with the famous quote: “it’s a trap!!” 😊

Mine is a mallrat.

Nah.

Yes and no. Some people have a sense of humour. Just sayin’

No, persevere. There’s something to be said for people who aren’t afraid to speak up in local, and it broadens the possibility of anyone answering, without sending the same IM to everyone 😉

I would say “playing SL is hard”, period. I would also say, do you want it to be easy? Tic-tac-toe easy, that you can manage it all in a couple hours and then there’s nothing else new to learn, no new challenge to master, nothing to make you feel like you’re still going ahead and not be bored?  First, you don’t “need” a nicer avatar. If you feel your avatar has to do the talking for you, you’re doing it wrong. SL is a bit more than a fashion model runway. I’m not saying there’s no people and places where that happens... I’m saying you don’t have to automatically enslave yourself to those, and do everything they expect or ask of you. Second, 10% of a huge Marketplace is still a lot. It’s only really insuficcient if you don’t even look at it because you’re somehow protesting that it should be 50% and you won’t look at any of it until it reaches that percentage. May I suggest a possible way to succeed more than you apparently have so far? Drop the defeatist, self-victimist, “born-to-be-shunned” attitude already. One instance of it may elicit an “aww” or two, perhaps a couple pats in the back... but if you’re like that all the time, there’s only so much anyone can take of it, especially those who come to SL with their own baggage, and the last thing they need is more downers. Let me put it another way. Regardless of those apparent‘difficulties’, many males succeed wildly in SL—some actually welcome the challenge, if any. Some make incredibly good avatars for themselves. Some gather a huge list of friends—of both genders—whom they have a lot of fun with. Quite a few do both things. And no, these aren’t rocket scientists I’m talking about. They’re just people who try. And if they can, so can you.

More places dedicated to kill and/or f**k everything that moves, and half of the things that don’t?

If I had to pay that to get a lover, a friend or a loyal host, I’d have bigger problems to worry about.

Most answers have been about clothing, quite correctly. However, and in my experience, another thing many new players have trouble getting is the nature of socializing in SL. Even those past sending friendship requests left & right, still think it’s a question of asking every stranger. Insofar as they see it as a virtual world, they think that different (looser) rules apply.

FIFY. To answer the question: both. Less the former, not because I believe it should be up to others, but because too many come awfully close to saying “hi” and considering that they’ve already done their part, now it completely falls on the other to carry the weight of the conversation and the burden to make it interesting. Saying “hello” only signals your intent to start a conversation, and polite though it may be, in itself it invites or facilitates no deeper response than merely repeating back the word. That’s not a conversation, that’s just the human equivalent of a protocol handshake to open an electronic communication; and in the cases we’re mainly discussing in this thread, it too often ends up being performing the handshake, and then sending absolutely nothing—except perhaps more protocol messages intended to keep the channel open... just to keep it open. It’s not about who starts it, or with what exact token, any more than it is about gender, Lureo. It’s about content.

Not necessarily. I’ve had people entirely skipping all canned conversation starters and going straight to the point. And a lot who didn’t, would’ve been surprised just how well that went with me; the very rarity of it already piques my interest. Even those who didn’t have a point other than conversation itself, found me interesting to talk to, if and when they contributed to it being something that actually excites the mind—be it discussion, banter, etc. “Hi” and “how are you?” and “I’m from <insert nation>” are, dare I say, not terribly exciting. I can give as good as I take, if not better; but I have to be given something other than thin air. Depending on the case, I might do my part to hold the conversation for a while, even throw something of my own to spice it up; but I sure as heck ain’t going to be the only one trying to make it more than what mere chatterbots could do.

I’m neither. I just suck at socializing.

Or “this place is dead”, or “full of bots”, or “how boring!”, or... yeah. I actively refrain from engaging all the whiners who basically expect the rest of SL to be there for the sole purpose of entertainment, and on keen watch to start talking—no matter what about—the very second they arrive... lest we disappoint them! (Funnily enough, a lot of them remain exactly as silent and as unwilling to start a conversation themselves, and only usually drop a disparaging comment right before a ragequit).