Resiliency In Second Life

[Love Zhaoying]

19 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

Is there anything you do to cope with difficulties in SL that you care to share?  I chant a lot, and that helps me feel more positive and so am resilient when encountering some of the negative people.

I missed or forgot about this, so am glad @Scylla Rhiadra quoted it.

Personally, I have no desire to chant in Second Life, since I can chant in Real Life.

Edited April 17 by Love Zhaoying
* chant, not change

[Scylla Rhiadra]

9 minutes ago, Garnet Psaltery said:

 

Of course I don't own God, God owns me, but anyway my objection was that the prayer quoted was by a Christian, to whom God very definitely was not any other.

And so . . . ?

As I say, I think critiquing Luna's reading of such a prayer is well within the bounds of propriety, free speech, etc., just as I critiqued Kipling's poem, but you seem to be going a step further and telling her that she's not "permitted" to quote, interpret, or use it?

If I'm wrong, and you are merely critiquing her use of it, perhaps you might explain the basis of that critique? Beyond the fact that Luna is not "your kind" of Christian?

Edited April 17 by Scylla Rhiadra
Typo (sigh)

[Luna Bliss]

2 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

19 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

Is there anything you do to cope with difficulties in SL that you care to share?  I chant a lot, and that helps me feel more positive and so am resilient when encountering some of the negative people.

I missed or forgot about this, so am glad @Scylla Rhiadra quoted it.

Personally, I have no desire to chant in Second Life, since I can chant in Real Life.

I chant in RL too, but chanting with others (like in my Moonlight Mantras class each week in SL) is a special experience, and many develop resiliency from it. As well as Kirtan in SL each week where we do guided dances as we chant. 

[Persephone Emerald]

/me put on hip boots to wade into this quagmire.

Mentioning prayer as a coping mechanism is not the same as discussing religion. Meditation is not the same as prayer; meditation quiets the mind; prayer directs thoughts and wishes toward a diety. Chanting may be a kind of prayer too, but the repetition of words also creates a meditative state.

Posting a prayer or psalm comes very close to advocating for a particular religion, which would be against the forum rules. Mentioning God is usually vague enough to not be a problem, but suggesting that a particular god or religious belief is more real or true than others would not be ok. We have people here with all different kinds of beliefs, which is to be expected on a secular forum. We should not denigrate or raise up one belief over another here.

p.s.

I don't need resilience to enjoy SL. I need it for real life. If SL upsets one so much that they need coping mechanisms to continue using it, they might benefit by real life therapy.

Edited April 17 by Persephone Emerald

[Rolig Loon]

I don't often find myself in stressful situations in SL, so I don't have much need for coping strategies. The teleport button and the big red X are enough for those times when I'd rather be somewhere else.  Otherwise, some smooth jazz keeps lesser demons away.

[Love Zhaoying]

4 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

And so . . . ?

As I say, I think critiquing Luna's reading of such a prayer is well within the bounds of propriety, free speech, etc., just as I critiqued Kipling's poem, but you seem to be going a step further and telling her that she's now "permitted" to quote, interpret, or use it?

If I'm wrong, and you are merely critiquing her use of it, perhaps you might explain the basis of that critique? Beyond the fact that Luna is not "your kind" of Christian?

Everything past a certain point (* points at that point *) is open to interpretation, AND is one's faith-based opinion, AND is also "the absolute truth".

It's a wonderful contradiction!!! From certain perspectives (most easily illustrated from other religions), it comes down to whether one is addressing things from a "personal" point of view, an "absolute" point of view, using "hidden knowledge", etc. etc. etc.! 🙂

 

[Arielle Popstar]

3 minutes ago, Rick Nightingale said:

Today I learned that is a word; I thought you had made it up at first. That might be linked to me being one of those who is somewhat triggered by it though. As soon as anything related crops up, I just switch off. My experiences of such things and people have been some of the worst I've had.

Yes it was a term that I needed to learn at a certain point and came to to realize it already had been coined. In my response to you in another thread I mentioned coming from a similar background as you and pretty much walked away from that until the age of 35 when I had to again incorporate the concept into my daily life if I had any hope of continued existence. 

I went through a process of coming to accept the terms and realizing they were just words that had their parallels in psychology, self help groups and other disciplines. I use the word "religiosity" mostly in the context of those who have a religion that is stripped of its spirituality and only remains as a legalism framework that only strives to make oneself look like a good church member but doesn't follow it other then making the outside look good while the inside isn't.

[Love Zhaoying]

1 minute ago, Persephone Emerald said:

/me put on hip boots to wade into this quagmire.

Mentioning prayer as a coping mechanism is not the same as discussing religion.

Literal prayer IN Second Life sounds weird, doesn't it?  I thought prayers are in our heads!

I guess one could "type" the prayer, or "say it on voice"..!

 

[Arielle Popstar]

15 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Yes, this echoes the Serenity "thingie".....to accept what we can't change.

Yes, if one isn't being granted the serenity, then maybe there is something one needs to change but most of all, needing the wisdom to know the difference.

[Luna Bliss]

5 minutes ago, Persephone Emerald said:

p.s.

I don't need resilience to enjoy SL. I need it for real life. If SL upsets one so much that they need coping mechanisms to continue using it, they might benefit by real life therapy.

That's an unfair statement.  If you utilize SL to expand yourself in major ways, to grow, it can be quite stressful.  It's what I've chosen to do here and I love it.  Not saying everybody should do that. But all stress requires coping mechanisms, whether in RL or SL.

Also, judging from all the chaos in the relationship area of the forum I'd say there's lots of miserable people in SL who could learn some resiliency techniques to make their SL a happier one.

[Scylla Rhiadra]

Just now, Love Zhaoying said:

Everything past a certain point (* points at that point *) is open to interpretation, AND is one's faith-based opinion, AND is also "the absolute truth".

It's a wonderful contradiction!!! From certain perspectives (most easily illustrated from other religions), it comes down to whether one is addressing things from a "personal" point of view, an "absolute" point of view, using "hidden knowledge", etc. etc. etc.! 🙂

 

It is of course all very complicated, because words and ideas don't really "belong" to anyone once they have been articulated (I mean, in the sense that anyone gets to dictate how they are interpreted). Weirdly, this point keeps coming up in this thread, from the insistence that there is only one "true" way to understand Kipling's poem, to the equally questionable notion that prayers, scriptural texts, etc., are inviolable and can only be used or read in a way prescribed by a certain variety of belief.

And part of the issue there is that people elide the boundaries between what you call personal point of view and absolute ones.

I am very far from suggesting that my reading of Kipling's poem is the only "correct" one -- I am very well aware that other, very clever people, have written reams on it, and on Kipling's own system of belief. That's the beauty of literature: it is susceptible to a nearly endless variety of readings (which, however, must at least be evidence-based to be valid).

I'd argue that the same is true, with somewhat different results sometimes, of religious texts. I am not at all conventionally religious, but I find scripture to be full of beauty and wisdom (and a few things that are neither). And I don't even believe in a personal god!

[Persephone Emerald]

5 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Literal prayer IN Second Life sounds weird, doesn't it?  I thought prayers are in our heads!

I guess one could "type" the prayer, or "say it on voice"..!

One can do both. There are church services and meditation events in SL. I also attend pagan rituals in which the attendees respond in text to the words of the person leading the ritual. 

[Love Zhaoying]

2 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

If you utilize SL to expand yourself in major ways, to grow, it can be quite stressful.

Have you considered using SL to increase your resilience to the stress you experience in SL?

 

[Luna Bliss]

Just now, Love Zhaoying said:

3 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

If you utilize SL to expand yourself in major ways, to grow, it can be quite stressful.

Have you considered using SL to increase your resilience to the stress you experience in SL?

Yes, that's what the SL chanting class and Kirtan is for.

[Love Zhaoying]

12 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

from the insistence that there is only one "true" way to understand Kipling's poem

..pointing out that understanding the poem is enhanced / guided certain ways, if the poem is correctly quoted! (Referencing the fact, that it was posted earlier the last line / bits of the poem were changed in the quoted version.)

12 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

to the equally questionable notion that prayers, scriptural texts, etc., are inviolable and can only be used or read in a way prescribed by a certain variety of belief.

That darn "faith" stuff just works different for everyone, in my experience.  How it relates to Second Life, I suppose, is a "very personal" thing (just like "faith" is).

12 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

And part of the issue there is that people elide the boundaries between what you call personal point of view and absolute ones.

I would put it that people "confound" the two - I have a better word but cannot think of it. (I had to lookup "elide", which according to Oxford Google means "merge".) ETA: "Conflate"!

12 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

I am very far from suggesting that my reading of Kipling's poem is the only "correct" one -- I am very well aware that other, very clever people, have written reams on it, and on Kipling's own system of belief. That's the beauty of literature: it is susceptible to a nearly endless variety of readings (which, however, must at least be evidence-based to be valid).

Yet, as a professional in English (I assume English Literature, although I do not know your specialty), you are well within your rights to state a "correct" interpretation; while yes, most people agree that poetry is a form of literature that is MOST "open to interpretation" (humbly). 

12 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

I'd argue that the same is true, with somewhat different results sometimes, of religious texts. I am not at all conventionally religious, but I find scripture to be full of beauty and wisdom (and a few things that are neither). And I don't even believe in a personal god!

Hmm Hmm Hmm.  It depends on the practitioner, the practice, etc. The "path".  But you and I seem to agree even if we are saying different things. (Many people read words but do not understand their "original", "true" or "intended" meanings, just as with Poetry.)

 

Edited April 17 by Love Zhaoying

[Love Zhaoying]

9 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Yes, that's what the SL chanting class and Kirtan is for.

That is absolutely WEIRD!

Now that (assuming) I understand, if these are being used to mitigate stress WITHIN SL caused BY SL, just..wow!

23 minutes ago, Rolig Loon said:

I don't often find myself in stressful situations in SL, so I don't have much need for coping strategies. The teleport button and the big red X are enough for those times when I'd rather be somewhere else.  Otherwise, some smooth jazz keeps lesser demons away.

I'm with Rolig on this one.  The day I have to "pray in SL" to "deal with SL", I've gone beyond the pale.

 

 

[Persephone Emerald]

28 minutes ago, Rick Nightingale said:

That's how I look at it, or at least have learned to. It is true (for some definition of 'true' I guess). No-one can actually make me feel any thing; I (should be able to) choose how I feel regardless of what someone else might say or do. [snip]

How one feels is not always within their control. People who have been traumatized may react to triggers. Someone who has PTSD from being in a war zone may feel scared and threatened by the sound of fireworks or by a the sight of someone who looks a particular way. Someone who was traumatized in a religious context may also feel threatened or dehumanized by discussions about religion or God. 

We can usually control our behaviors, but we can't always control our emotions.

[Love Zhaoying]

7 minutes ago, Persephone Emerald said:

We can usually control our behaviors, but we can't always control our emotions.

Great job! I suppose this is what I meant in my long post earlier.  

For example: There is the "hope" that by controlling our "behavioral" response, it helps over time to mitigate our "emotional reaction".

Paraphrasing my own Guru: You can "feel bad", and that stinks. But it doesn't mean you throw out all of Truth.

 

[Rowan Amore]

11 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

The day I have to "pray in SL" to "deal with SL", I've gone beyond the pale.

yep

[Kyrie Deka]

26 minutes ago, Persephone Emerald said:

I don't need resilience to enjoy SL. I need it for real life. If SL upsets one so much that they need coping mechanisms to continue using it, they might benefit by real life therapy.

Hear, hear.

For entertainment purposes. The day it is generally more stressful than enjoyable entertainment is the day one should seriously consider backing away from the keyboard.  

Resiliency?  Navigating around those that just insist on never being positive/always being negative, it helps to be mindful - really conscious of - that all that negative spewing comes from RL hurt that hasn't been properly navigated by [their RL situation-not necessarily their fault]. 

And having - constantly available at a moments notice - the room in one's heart to understand that's goin on when it happens, and *let them get through their path that they need to navigate* with compassion and without being sucked down in to it.   Like quicksand.  Slowly taking your joy away. 

Admittedly it takes a huge clearing of ones throat and a deep breath sometimes, because heck, we are all human.  And yes, I surely wish there was more self-awareness and self-control before spewing.  But responding to it requires self-awareness and self-control also.  

[Arielle Popstar]

15 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

I'm with Rolig on this one.  The day I have to "pray in SL" to "deal with SL", I've gone beyond the pale.

That's like saying those needing help, don't need it in virtual. Do we magically become gods in sl? Be a good marketing angle.

Become a god in Secondlife!

[Orwar]

   Resilience is booting SL back up after you've been TP hammering into an event for 3 hours and, when you finally slip in, you get a TP crash.

   Nods sagely.

[Love Zhaoying]

46 minutes ago, Persephone Emerald said:

p.s.

I don't need resilience to enjoy SL. I need it for real life. If SL upsets one so much that they need coping mechanisms to continue using it, they might benefit by real life therapy.

Almost missed this bit. Right on!

[BilliJo Aldrin]

54 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Spirituality is vital to me, and I spend hours each day attending to it. It's my main source of resiliency.  Due to this insult I am blocking you.

someone told me in the forum the other day (probably someone that doesn’t like me) that naming a person you have blocked serves no useful purpose and just creates drama.

Its probably against the rules too 😂

[Love Zhaoying]

Hot take: If you use the legacy "rubber" material, then your Second Life should be more resilient and bounce right back!