aleenaharvey Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 I'm quite new to SL so I must say I'm still not all that used to this. But every time I'm on the beach or in a club, about 5 or 6 men try to talk to me, and about 70% of them ask for sex straightaway, while others just chat with you. just wondering if this is the norm here in SL :S So men in SL, is this what you normally do, trying to talk to every single women you see? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peewee Musytari Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Yep its pretty common, makes you wonder if thats their approach in RL too lol Its not just men btw, I have seen plenty of women in SL that are no better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoothie Perl Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Just think, if in RL, you are pretty, you wear an xtra mini skirt and you deside to walk in the street alone with your best smexiest walk you can. What's gonna happen? same in SL and there isn't fear of a "slap in face" in case they are more rude than normal lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoothie Perl Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Peewee Musytari wrote: Yep its pretty common, makes you wonder if thats their approach in RL too lol Its not just men btw, I have seen plenty of women in SL that are no better. oh yes, women are equal pretty offensive some times Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacki Silverfall Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Maybe because they're really men LOL! :smileyvery-happy: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ceera Murakami Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Also take into consideration that before the 16 and 17 year olds were permitted to access the main grid, SL was entirely an adults-only, must-be-over-18 environment where virtually any sexual behavior short of kiddy porn was socially acceptable and completely anonymous. Approaching someone you don't know in SL isn't the same as approaching a stranger on the street in RL. It's more like approaching a stranger that is hanging out in a swingers club next to the nude beach in red light district. There's a far higher probability that a sexual advance will be taken positively, because they are voluntarily in an environment where sexual advances are commonplace. And if the first person you ask doesn't respond positively, there's plenty more to choose from that probably will. This environment is extremely attractive to anyone seeking to fulfill a sexual fantasy, and as such, you'll get a lot more people, of both genders, who are pre-disposed to being open and frank about their sex fantasy desires, and who will jump straight from "Hi!" to "You wanna ******?", without ever bothering to get to know the person. Just like in a swingers bar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uallas Borgin Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Same as in real life, men do the courting and women do the choosing, lol. When looking for a date, women can be their charming self and just wait for men to find an excuse to start a conversation. They women can then decide show interest of not in the men wanting to talk to them. The only exception to this rule are men like George Cloony or Bradd Pit. Like said before, in Second Life, there is no risk of a slap in the face. Communication is in text assysted with some crude gestures, nothing like the "ewwww", "yuck" or "not in your life" facial expressions men can encounter in real life. I guess a lot of men see SL as a safe environment to practice their chatting up skills before trying them in the real world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ceka Cianci Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 a lot depends on where you go.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pussycat Catnap Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 I've seen quite a few men in SL who think normal rules for seduction no longer apply. To be fair, in many locations, they're right. Hit half the spots in Zindra and there's poseballs just lying around that random people hop onto. Some however, don't know how to keep conduct ok in one place out of another. SL is all just one big place in their perspective. If the location has a lot of new people - who've read "things" about SL, that can drive this up too. But I've had a few oldbies toss me the line as well in past when I myself was a newbie / had a less developed look. Though the first time this ever happened to me, it was a woman making the move. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Undercroft Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Aleena, the men are just displaying the "social skills" which have caused them to be losers in RL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vladi Hazelnut Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 I would say it depends on where you go and the age of the avatar. Newbi's tend to be sex hounds, and nude beaches and strip clubls draw them in like rotting meat draws flies. Most avis that are older know better, because know half the female avis are really guys anyway lol. I say look for new places to hang out, but you will alway get the occosianal ass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ceka Cianci Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Vladi Hazelnut wrote: I would say it depends on where you go and the age of the avatar. Newbi's tend to be sex hounds, and nude beaches and strip clubls draw them in like rotting meat draws flies. Most avis that are older know better, because know half the female avis are really guys anyway lol. I say look for new places to hang out, but you will alway get the occosianal ass. i remember one man just a couple of weeks back that IM'd me.. he basically just IM'd me i guess just to get me out of the way..he said"Hi there..i guess you are probably lesbian or bi also right?" I was like wha? who is this?!!! he was like.."Well every girl i have IM'd here is bi or lesbian or into other girls" i said..no i am not into other girls and i am also not into people just IMing me about my sex life..if you can't talk to me from anywhere but your mushroom mouth then please don't talk to me at all.. Perve!! i was in a bad mood..i usually would have toy'd with them more..but some days i just am not in the mood for it.. and women are just as bad.. hi there..are you bi or lesbian.. no i am into trying??! Trying what ? Trying to understand why you perves keep IMing me asking me about my sex life why do people start off with this kind of crap... i should just randomly start IMing people asking them if they are into corn or apples..just to see what they say.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dana Post Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 I've been back all of a day, between the pervs/horndogs and the fact that the "nice" sims seem to be going away in favor of sleezy bars, clubs and endless stores, I'm all ready to go back to Azeroth NOW. Then again I play my SL looks odd to A: represent my self view, and B: to Avoid that sort of harassment. How am I "registered 2010"? I"ve been on SL since 06! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deej Kasshiki Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Dana the "registered 2010" applies only to when you signed up for the (old Jive-based version, prior to this one) forums, not your SL rez date. To the OP's question, it's a combination of the variables that others have mentioned. How much you get bothered like this depends very much on where you are, your av's appearance, the ages of people about (noobs are infamous for pulling this kind of stuff) and probably cultural differences as well. Be assured that all men in SL don't behave in such a disrespectful manner. If you're getting this a lot in the places you frequent you should try some different places. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoothie Perl Posted July 22, 2011 Share Posted July 22, 2011 Ceera Murakami wrote: Also take into consideration that before the 16 and 17 year olds were permitted to access the main grid, SL was entirely an adults-only, must-be-over-18 environment where virtually any sexual behavior short of kiddy porn was socially acceptable and completely anonymous. Approaching someone you don't know in SL isn't the same as approaching a stranger on the street in RL. It's more like approaching a stranger that is hanging out in a swingers club next to the nude beach in red light district. There's a far higher probability that a sexual advance will be taken positively, because they are voluntarily in an environment where sexual advances are commonplace. And if the first person you ask doesn't respond positively, there's plenty more to choose from that probably will. This environment is extremely attractive to anyone seeking to fulfill a sexual fantasy, and as such, you'll get a lot more people, of both genders, who are pre-disposed to being open and frank about their sex fantasy desires, and who will jump straight from "Hi!" to "You wanna ******?", without ever bothering to get to know the person. Just like in a swingers bar. I totally agree and if we try to look deep inside in every one of us, I think will find that's one of the reasons we choose SL to login in. I think also that, the feeling of been desirable it's irresistible and for some seniors of us (like me) if we been that pretty in the past RL it’s unforgettable also. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer Boyle Posted July 23, 2011 Share Posted July 23, 2011 I would describe it as common and understandable, as I think normal implies more of an endorsement than I want to give. Many people, of which I am one, enjoy exploring areas or life and activities in SL that we would never go near in RL. I expect that many men would like to proposition strange women in RL but lack the courage to do so. Both folk wisdom and formal studies tell us that if they approach enough women, one will say yes. Of course, they'll have to be prepared to endure numerous rejections. In SL, the emotional cost of rejection is much less because of anonymity, "unreality," and, I think also, because most of us are only mildly offended if we are at all, so we don't react with the hostility that we might in RL. I'll bet your reaction was milder than it would have been in RL. I'm not offended when some guy IMs me wanting sex; depending on my mood, I either ignore him, politely decline, or string him along for fun. It seems likely that the success rate would be higher in SL, since most of the tangible bad consequences of promiscuous sex, such as STDs, unwanted pregnancy, being assaulted or killed or robbed, career damage, marital damage, etc, are not possible. I know that there have been times in my RL when concern about such consequences was the sole reason I didn't have sex. Another thing to consider is that SL is a sexier place than almost all of the real world. I am not talking just about the adult, overtly sexual parts. The average woman's height and cup size are greater, her neckline lower, her skirt shorter, her heels higher, her age lower, and her walk sexier, and the average number of bare midriffs is astronomically greater. And, of course, everyone who wants to and has been here a while has beautiful skin and hair. If I looked in RL like I do in SL, I would get hit on a LOT more, I expect! And, SL sex is not sex. It's pretending that electronically generated and displayed avatars are having sex. It is not in any way as momentous as sex, and both propositioning someone and engaging in it are far less serious things than in RL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mayalily Posted July 23, 2011 Share Posted July 23, 2011 Yes, it happens. Put something in your profile about what you want and do not want, such as I'd like to dance and get to know some men as friends first. If they send you a friendship offer and you like them, then IM them and get to know them. But to answer your OP, yeah, that's pretty standard for some places. Moderate not so much, tho. Try some moderate places. Or is this happening to you on moderate also? I stay pretty much moderate. It's just more fun for me as I have a rl bf and don't need another one that's for sure! lol Just kidding, no my rl guy is an angel for the most part. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jo Yardley Posted July 23, 2011 Share Posted July 23, 2011 Depends on the places you visit. Besides from the few places I visited in my first week in SL it has not happened to me in the last 2 years. Visiting museums, eductional soms or taking part in historical roleplay may have something to do with that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dilbert Dilweg Posted July 23, 2011 Share Posted July 23, 2011 Arent those 10 or 12 year olds that usually ask that right up front? lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vladi Hazelnut Posted July 23, 2011 Share Posted July 23, 2011 No, sometimes is 60 year old guys lol. Age doesn't seem to matter. A perve is a perve. The problem is a lot forget that there are real people on the other end of the keyboard. And the fact that there is no risk to behaving like an ass. You don't get slapped in the face like in real life lol. Mute works fairly well though. And like has been said, these are mostly people that would NEVER do that in real life, they simply don't have the balls to do it. If someone were doing that on our sim and you contacted me or one of the managers we would probably have a chat with them about how to act, and if they didn't get the hint we would ban them. But then we run racing sim not a beach, although we do have a nice little beach on our homestead. And I would bet you a linden the female avi's that are IMing you out of the blue asking if you are bi or lesbian or most likely guys playing as girls. The majority of actual gay women I know simply don't act that way. IMing someone just to ask for sex or if to see what their sexual orientation is is a pretty lame opening line in my opinion lol. Not very creative. I would as them how often that line works for them. Other than with escorts. I always thought flirting was half the fun. And even if you said yes, my guess would be the next question would be "where can I get a **bleep**" lol. Or they would have one of those nasty freebie ones. Oh and another sure way to get them to leave you alone is tell them yes, but it will cost them 5K an hour lol. Normally sends them running. And if they don't, hey its an easy 5K lmao. Jump on a pose ball and go get a sandwhich while they perve out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoothie Perl Posted July 23, 2011 Share Posted July 23, 2011 Vladi Hazelnut wrote: .....Oh and another sure way to get them to leave you alone is tell them yes, but it will cost them 5K an hour lol. Normally sends them running. And if they don't, hey its an easy 5K lmao. Jump on a pose ball and go get a sandwhich while they perve out. That's was my way. LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madman626 Fall Posted July 24, 2011 Share Posted July 24, 2011 yeah for the most part but some was prolly woman. so it not all guys lol losers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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