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Nikolai Warden

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About Nikolai Warden

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  1. I have read the TOS, and have long known that child avatars are permitted (at sim owner discretion) on adult rated sims. My question has to do with the bit about proximity to sex scripted objects. Just how far away must a child avatar be from such an object without violating TOS? For example, if I have a sex bed and a friend wearing a toddler avatar visits in the living room, 10 meters away from the bed, is that far enough away? If I have a large house or skybox with several bedrooms, is down the hall far enough away?
  2. No, you are correct. They are not hard and fast facts, merely observations I and a few other hosts, DJ friends, and dancers have made over the years. People tip what they can, when they can, of course. However, I think what constitutes a "good" tip has somewhat of a cultural basis. What is sometimes perceived as under tipping at some gay clubs is perceived as exceedingly generous at other venues. I did not mention that as a criticism. Having attended parties for years at European owned clubs, I noticed tips of 10 to 25 Lindens being more the norm. This led to my belief that SL is pricier for some than others. Once again, these are my impressions, not hard facts.
  3. I think that the majority of free accounts are not griefing/stalker or content theft or scammer accounts. I think it is just that there is no incentive to be a premium member unless one wishes to own mainland parcels. The majority of people I have met in SL with premium accounts have them in order to live economically in SL. A Linden home, and 300L a week that they save up in order to shop in SL, and whatever other perks premium membership offers. I suspect it is the opposite of what severa, here seem to think ... LL may attempt to peddle premium accounts as being oh, better or elitist or what have you, but those I know with free accounts spend more in SL in a month than many with premium accounts spend in a year, including the cost of the premium membership. As to the issues of griefing, stalking, content theft, and scamming, other than the last on the list, I suspect there is much less of that in SL than one would suppose if one goes by the content of the forums.
  4. All these suggestions are great. One thing I would add is to treat everyone in a friendly manner regardless of whether they tip or not. Also, thank everyone sincerly, whether someone gives you a 20 L tip or 500 L tip, the thank you should be just as warm and friendly. Along with not asking for tips, I would add not getting in someone's IM and disparaging that person for not tipping, or threatening to boot someone for that reason. Yes, incredibly there is at least one host I know who threatens contest and sploder winners for not tipping a portion of their winnings. Every DJ, dancer, and host I have encountered always says it is not about the tips, but rather the fun. I tend to think this is for the most part bunk, but if you are doing it for the money, some virtual method acting may be required. Also, patrons at gay venues tend to tip better than at other venues, and a lot of Europeans tip less than people from other parts of the world, due I suspect, to the added cost they have in purchasing Lindens.
  5. Some people I know rent parcels, full sims, and homesteads at cost, because owning a private region is not always driven by profit. Two people I know parcel their sims quite generously and rent by the prim rather than by the amount of land. So for instance, a renter wants use of a maximum of 1000 prims. The parcel they rent holds 1500 prims. The parcels are all set to the same group and the "owner" manages the parcel via the settings in about land. The group that the parcels are all set to are closed groups, so the only people who can rez are one's neighbors. Given that each parcel has prims to spare, people can "borrow" prims if they are building something, or say, having an event, without having items returned. If prims get tight, people clean up their building platforms or tighten their orim belts a wee bit here and there, because their neighbors do the same for them. This does not work for everyone, of course. However, for the last three years I have lived at sims that run this way and it is a very friendly, neighborly way of doing things. I lived on a large mainland parcel owned by a friend, and it was a less than satisfactory experience. One can live in sky boxes or domes, or use screens on the ground, but if living on the ground, there tends to be such flotsom suspended at low altitude nearby that reducing one's draw distance is necessary. Ban lines abound, and it can take a lot of prims to hide the horrid, dated ground textures. The limited terraforming is also a challenge in creating a nice environment on the ground. Lag on a mainland sim can occur with nothing to be done about it. One cannot turn off a neighbor's heavily scripted objects, nor do anything about someone who has autoreturn off and their parcel open to object entry object creation, and scripts. Given such limitations, I would choose to pay a wee bit more to live on a private sim than mainland, were that necessary. I do not know, but suspect that there are at least as many reputable private estate owners as there are mainland owners. Oh and in my experience, "purchasing" land at a private region usually costs very little if anything, or at most, the first week's rent. I have friends that get together and share the cost of a sim, and that can work out well. It can also end in disaster, though it seems to me that if they are good friends and not romantic partners, it tends to work out better.
  6. I do not know what clubs you go to, but the straight clubs I have gone to and danced a gropey couples dance or waltz or such tend to be jazz clubs or ballrooms with both me and my fellow wearing tuxedos. I have seen other male couples at such venues as well. In general though, if it is not an intentionally romantic venue or event, I do not see couples dancing together ... oh the occasional couple here and there, dancing some slow romantic dance to high energy dance or rock tunes, but I think I speak for more than just myself when I tend to think "gosh, can they not just get a room?" As for being inhibited, well in general, a club that defines itself as "straight" can be full of straight men, and while no, they are not going to drag me outside and beat me up for being gay, as it is SL after all, they can (and do) make snarky, hateful, anti gay comments in IM or open chat. The prevalence of such unpleasant conversations is far less than it used to be, but still, who wants to go out for a nice time and have nasty remarks and such directed toward them? In gay clubs, there are straight men who come for the music, for the dancing, and to hang out with friends. Some bring their girlfriends, others do not. No one is inhibited. I am a stripper at one such place and the straight fellows will tip me and not balk at a sexy emote for a thank you from me. From what I have seen and experienced, a good many gay men prefer to dance in sync on someone's chim, in pairs or a row. I do not quite grasp that, as it always reminds me of a chorus line or dancers on those 1970s era variety shows (WOW, I am in a gay version of the Donny and Marie Show!).
  7. I believe that one can have genuine friends one has never met in person. Many people have friends they have not seen for decades with whom they keep in touch via correspondence of one form or another ... childhood friends or college friends who are far flung across the globe but keep in touch. I do not think forming a genuine friendship in SL is too too different from that. For centuries, pen pals who have never met have formed deep bonds; SL seems a variant on a long standing theme in that sense. I can fall in love in SL, I can fall in like also. I can also loathe people I have met in SL. As for the former, heck, I have had feelings for people whose avatars were not the least attractive to me. If one decides to be honest, expressing true opinions, sharing genuine interests and values with others who equally open to sharing of themselves, real relationships are possible, as is real dislike for the person behind an avatar. Yes, there is a strong element of fantasy involved, but on occasion one can connect with someone in SL and get to know them well enough to get behind the persona. Twice now, I have lost SL friends to death, and, having lost RL friends to death as well by way of comparison, I can say yes, these two people were genuine friends whom I loved, not because of their avatar but because of who was behind the avatar. As for where I draw the line ... I chat via skype or Telegram, I will share the occasional RL photo ... but I draw the line at meeting in person, in the case of a SL romance. I was partnered for nearly seven years to someone in SL, and he has a RL partner of close to twenty years. About 10 months after I became romantically involved in SL with him, I met a fellow in RL and years later, we are married. Do our RL fellows know about us? Yes. Are they OK with it? Yes. Do they consider that we are cheating on them? No. However, I have known several people in SL who have brought their relationships to RL, regardless of RL entanglements or commitments, causing pain to those they profess to love. So that is the line I draw, no meeting in RL for me.
  8. The quality of your graphics card, your graphics setting, a good eye, and use of effective windlight (relating to having a good eye) can produce superb results without needing any post processing beyond perhaps cropping and resizing. This is particularly true in regard to landscape photography, but applies to portraiture as well. Especially now with mesh bodies that do not have jagged angles and edges that would require editing out, great photos can be done by choosing proper lighting and poses. Some of the really well known photographers in SL do a lot of heavy post processing which is part of their personal style, and that is grand but not necessary. There is a flickr group for unedited SL photos, and I am often quite impressed. That being said, I go through phases of taking unedited photos and then alternating with photos I have edited the heck out of. Both have appeal for me. As Chase said, it is easier for people to take better quality profile pictures of themselves, and I have seen a fair amount. However, a good many cannot, as they lack the vision of which Tamara wrote. A good way to get business is to do an amazing self portrait for your own profile, as well as asking those whose photos you do to credit you in their profile. But definitely get out and about ... take photos at parties and give them to the venue owner if they are great shots, get involved in social activities and venues that oh, have contests and calendars featuring staff or regulars. Sometimes when I see someone with a very well done avatar, I ask if I can take his or her photo and send it to that person gratis when done, asking if I can post it on my flickr page.
  9. It has nothing to do with unfair land pricing advantages. One must own a heck of a lot of sims in order to get any sort of discounts ... I remember years ago, someone who owned upwards of 40 sims (most homesteads with a few full regions) complaining bitterly that he was not a big enough land owner to get discounts. Some places have a good vibe to them that takes years to establish, regardless of how pretty (or ugly) the sim is. Other places open and become popular sooner, once again, because of the vibe ... lots of parties, lots of shops, and things to do. A homestead simply does not have either the prims or the resources to support that sort of thing. Hanging out at a pretty place and the occasional party is not enough to make a gay hang out popular. Parties with popular DJs all week long, places to shop, snuggle areas and residential rentals, and a positive attitude and sense of genuine fun, rather than worrying about traffic or how to make tier, will usually generate traffic. I know several sim owners for whom rentals and donations are not enough to break even on the tier. Many do not aim to do so, but when they do, it is a plus. For some, making a bit back on the tier is enough, and the rest is chalked up to monthly entertainment budget. It seems to me that if one struggles to pay tier, and must rely on others in SL to supplement it, one may be living beyond one's virtual means. Your sim has not been open very long ... I recall the notices on Facebook. If you are not getting popular DJs for several parties a week, if it is just a nice place to hang out ... well, people can stay home for a nice place to hang out. I will also point out that your sim bears the same name as an iconic SL gay club that closed in 2010, due to the owner's ill health. He passed away in 2013 and was much beloved in the gay community. When I saw the Facebook post for your place, I thought ... but that is the name of Marcus' club! That might be a bit off putting to some. I know it was to me.
  10. Yes, I realize that is the point of the discussion, but from what I read of the original post, that does not seem to be the case, and the OP's belief is an erroneous one, as you pointed out earlier in the thread ...
  11. Purchasing any shape can be seen as a scam really, as anyone can modify the system shape with which an avatar is virtually born. When I see "bento" shapes on the market, I see them advertised as being optimized for a particular bento head, and they usually come with a style card. So really, what people are buying is a shape that will influence the look of the bento head. It is no more a scam than selling any shape for those who are shape modifying impaired, so to speak.
  12. You can contact an estate manager and ask if that person is banned. If it is a large estate, the ban could be estate wide, though the option to ban someone on a single sim in an estate does exist.
  13. While this is often the case, a good many private estates do not rent parcels in such a way as to make the renter the "owner" of the parcel. Renting, rather that buying at a private estate, is fairly common for urban sims. Other estates have it set up so that while all or some of the parcels may be "purchased," regardless of titular ownership of the parcels, all must be set to the estate's group. Some estate owners do not like to give full land rights to tenants because not everyone knows what they are about when it comes to land settings and the like.
  14. A friend of mine partnered her alts to each other and kept the gushing declaration of love in each alt's profile short ... "My other half." Though given there are really three of her, I always thought that should read "my other 0.333333 percent." I did a wedding album for them. The bride was lovely. Alas, the groom needed work. I suppose the good thing about partnering an alt is that it is not too likely both will be online much at the same time to quarrel and grow tired of one another. I did know a fellow years ago who had his entire family of alts. Husband, wife, children. He said he had several computers and would log them all in at once to play house. In that case, I do believe it would be both incest and masturbation. As the Bard wrote, "Self-love ... is not so vile a sin as self-neglecting."
  15. To paraphrase Aesop, "A man (or avatar) is known by the company he keeps."
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