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Are you attracted to avi’s who look a certain way.


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Actually Syo although he has not got into a mesh body that’s not to say that he is not attractive because I don’t think you have to be mesh to look good. Unless you are naked I don’t think it’s a given that you can’t look good.

He has a very busy RL and doesn’t spend huge amounts of time on SL so perhaps for him he doesn’t feel the necessity to get into it to that extent.  I haven’t broached the subject as it’s a choice I made for myself but not one he has chosen, which is fine with me.

I have seen on profiles ‘don’t approach me if you are not mesh’ which I think is a pretty short sighted attitude as you could be missing out on someone really nice.

I have been approached by quite a few great looking guys who had obviously gone to a lot of effort to make their avi’s look amazing, several of them turned out to be not very nice once I got talking to them.

i guess the whole thing comes down to personal choice in the end.

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3 hours ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

Its human nature to be drawn to what's attractive and be repulsed by what is ugly.

What they are in rl has no bearing whatsoever. Thats the beauty of secondlife, you aren't judged by the appearance of your rl body. 

But if an avatar (second life body.. which is the only one we have here)  catches my eye in a positive way, I'm more likely to talk to them.

If they are nice people, I'll keep talking to them. If their pretty avi hides an ugly soul, well we aren't going very far.

I get this. But it’s just not how I see it. Maybe it’s because I’m not looking for anything romantic in Second Life. Because if I was, your real life looks would be way more important than Barbie dress up. Not to say I’m shallow, but I do agree with your point that we are drawn to what is attractive. 

I also consider Second Life a “game.” One of hundreds that I’ve played. There have been a few people I’ve been attracted to in games before but only after we transferred our friendship beyond just the game. It’s pretty much drilled in my head no one is what they look like because I’ve yet to see an elf or orc or gnome. 

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25 minutes ago, Madelaine McMasters said:
43 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

I'm attracted to av's who look up and to the left.

Metaphorically, I find that attractive, too.

I'm suddenly remembering that if people look a certain way, it means they are accessing memory (or making up a lie).

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4 hours ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

Its human nature to be drawn to what's attractive and be repulsed by what is ugly.

This makes no sense, because "attractive" and "ugly" are completely subjective.  I figured you had it backwards, until I saw who said it! Then it made perfect sense, everything you say is "opposite" of reality and truth.

They way you put it. it means: "I am drawn to you, therefore you must be attractive", and "I am repulsed by you, therefore you must be ugly".  I wonder which type of logical syllogism failed in your statement?

Edited by Love Zhaoying
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8 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

I'm suddenly remembering that if people look a certain way, it means they are accessing memory (or making up a lie).

I watched something recently where the person said it could also mean they are very smart and think visually and spatially. 

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The current trend towards air-brushed fashion model "perfection" doesn't appeal to me.

Of my dearest friends inworld, one wears an ancient skin and the other has a mesh body whose textures only sometimes rez fully for me. They're lovely people and I wouldn't change either of them for the world.

My 8 year old main is pretty stable in her appearance, but my newish building alt is often in a state of flux as I go through periods of tweaking but usually get distracted by things which interest me more like talking with friends or building something. So if I meet someone new whose avatar isn't perfect either and they want to talk, I'll gladly do so in hopes that they also get distracted by interesting things themselves. :)

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Just now, Love Zhaoying said:

I dimly remember that looking one direction means one thing, and another direction means something else.

Well, the video I used had two examples. One was an Elon Musk interview, she said that he looks down to the left and that it means he is accessing memory. His answers to the question are tied to memory. Another was Pharma Bro, Martin Shkreli. Now, this one was a bit contentious. She said she didn't really know anything about him. So her assessment of the interview was that he looks up because he's extremely intelligent and is thinking visually or spatially, seeing the big picture.
 

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9 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

This makes no sense, because "attractive" and "ugly" are completely subjective.  I figured you had it backwards, until I saw who said it! Then it made perfect sense, everything you say is "opposite" of reality and truth.

They way you put it. it means: "I am drawn to you, therefore you must be attractive", and "I am repulsed by you, therefore you must be ugly".  I wonder which type of logical syllogism failed in your statement?

We're actually drawn to the average. Researchers have constructed "average" faces by compositing hundreds of randomly selected facial images. From infant (via gaze tracking) to adult (via asking), the more average the face, the better we like it. Outlying physical characteristics (like severe lack of symmetry) often indicate inferior reproductive potential, so it's theorized that our taste in faces optimizes propagation.

We're probably attracted to intelligence (which humor requires) for the same reason.

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9 minutes ago, Madelaine McMasters said:

We're actually drawn to the average. Researchers have constructed "average" faces by compositing hundreds of randomly selected facial images. From infant (via gaze tracking) to adult (via asking), the more average the face, the better we like it. Outlying physical characteristics (like severe lack of symmetry) often indicate inferior reproductive potential, so it's theorized that our taste in faces optimizes propagation.

We're probably attracted to intelligence (which humor requires) for the same reason.

This reminds me of an interesting video about the evolution of makeup. The person was explaining how a lot of the makeup we wear exaggerates signs of fertility -- our lips and cheeks become a bit more pink when we are in our fertility phase, our eyes darken, etc. 

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2 minutes ago, Nalytha said:

This reminds me of an interesting video about the evolution of makeup. The person was explaining how a lot of the makeup we wear exaggerates signs of fertility -- our lips and cheeks become a bit more pink when we are in our fertility phase, our eyes darken, etc. 

Yep, while we all wander around thinking we're in complete control, free to choose as we wish, our subconscious just sits back and smiles.

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It's easier for me to say what turns me off.

I have a huge turn off from males who look like they spend their time in a gym.  Oddly shaped females, like the current huge bum fad in SL also turn me off.  In SL I can't stand 7 foot (or worse) giants.

But these are just first reactions, I can be wooed.....  (Money also works)

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I'm more of a crowd junky than anything when it comes to having fun..I love main chat rather than IM's..Especially at a club..If I get in an IM at a club while I'm dancing,I start feeling like I'm missing the party..Although sometimes they can be interesting and fun also at times..But mainly love having fun with the rest of the crowd..

What attracts me is the different creative looks that people come up with,be it in fashion or just any kind of role play looks they put together..I don't really come to SL looking for love or relationships or sex or stuff like that..I do like having friends in world though..

I also love the way people can really fix their homes up with such detail..I can do that with my real home,but in SL I just don't spend enough time there to put my effort in that part of my SL..

I guess creative people are what attract me the most if I had to have a number one on a list..

 

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1 hour ago, Love Zhaoying said:

I'm suddenly remembering that if people look a certain way, it means they are accessing memory (or making up a lie).

Yeah, but you have to know if they are left or right handed to understand the eye movements.

"When people remember details, their eyes move up and to the left if they are left-handed. When right-handed people make something up, their eyes move up and to the right. The reverse is true of left-handed people."

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2 hours ago, Nalytha said:

I get this. But it’s just not how I see it. Maybe it’s because I’m not looking for anything romantic in Second Life. Because if I was, your real life looks would be way more important than Barbie dress up. Not to say I’m shallow, but I do agree with your point that we are drawn to what is attractive. 

I also consider Second Life a “game.” One of hundreds that I’ve played. There have been a few people I’ve been attracted to in games before but only after we transferred our friendship beyond just the game. It’s pretty much drilled in my head no one is what they look like because I’ve yet to see an elf or orc or gnome. 

I've had many SL romances. I've been partnered to the same girl for almost 4 years now, we both have partners in RL and  have no interest in going further. I don't need to know what she looks like in RL because I know what she looks like in SL.

Even with friends I want to be around avatars that are nice inside and look nice outside. Why would I hang around with a total mess?

Edited by BilliJo Aldrin
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2 hours ago, Love Zhaoying said:

This makes no sense, because "attractive" and "ugly" are completely subjective.  I figured you had it backwards, until I saw who said it! Then it made perfect sense, everything you say is "opposite" of reality and truth.

They way you put it. it means: "I am drawn to you, therefore you must be attractive", and "I am repulsed by you, therefore you must be ugly".  I wonder which type of logical syllogism failed in your statement?

You are attractive (to me) so I'm drawn to make contact with you . You are ugly (to me), so I turn and walk away. What is so hard to understand about that?

Don't overthink it sweetie, it's not rocket science.

Edited by BilliJo Aldrin
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I feel like, for me, it sort of depends of the avatar itself, where I am, the persons profile ect. If I'm on a roleplay sim, I tend to gravitate towards the avatars that look well put together, not necessarily expensive, but like they've really thought about what 'character' they're emulating. I'm attracted to them more I think because the effort tends to translate into their writing as well. 

If I'm not on an RP sim and I'm not RPing, then my consideration of the avatar sort of changes. Does it look like they're just here for the perverted stuff? Not a bad thing, just not for me and we probably wouldn't have much to talk about. Are they purposefully making themselves look in an offensive manor? (Such as, is your avatar African American? Is it a bad, racist steryo-type? I'll probably avoid).

Am I looking for romance? Then I'm probably looking to see if I'm attracted to your avatar, but maybe not in the 'do I like your shape? is it mesh?' but more 'do we have a similar style/taste that we like?' With males, I like them taller than me, big and strong looking. Girls I love curves and girlieness and tomboyness. 

 

I guess, in short, it kinda depends on what I'm looking for? 'Ugly' and 'Pretty' are subjective as others have said, and I do admit to seeing Avatars that just...don't look nice to me, but that doesn't mean I wont be nice and talk to someone and make friends.

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1 hour ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

Even with friends I want to be around avatars that are nice inside and look nice outside. Why would I hang around with a total mess?

Because we are just talking about pixels here... a "hot mess" in pixels doesn't mean they are a "hot mess" in personality. Actually, it's been my experience that some avatars who don't care about their superficial appearance have a much less superficial personality. 

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47 minutes ago, Nalytha said:

Because we are just talking about pixels here... a "hot mess" in pixels doesn't mean they are a "hot mess" in personality. Actually, it's been my experience that some avatars who don't care about their superficial appearance have a much less superficial personality. 

I agree but I'm never gonna meet the ugly looking avatar, so I'll never get to know what a wonderful person they are.

I don't think I ever said the avatar appearance reflects their personality.

I'm sorry, call me shallow, but I have absolutely no interest in meeting some ten yr old that still looks like a noob

 

Edited by BilliJo Aldrin
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