Scylla Rhiadra Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 1 minute ago, RowanMinx said: I'm sure someone will eventually get it moved elsewhere since that's how things go here. I do agree it probably would be better in general as opposed to YOUR avatar. I also think the knee-jerk reaction would be the title of the thread. Experiences? How about, Your Friends Paparazzied? Sneaking a shot of your Friends? Smile! While I Shoot You Avatar! On the one hand, I can't see any possible reasonable objections to a thread featuring pics of other people's avatars. I mean, why not? But there also isn't really a very logical place to put one. GD is a good catch-all I guess. Your joke about paparazzi is pretty funny, but brings up another point, which I assume doesn't apply to Pearl's pics. I don't mind my avi being caught in a sort of general pic of a party, or a dance club, or whatever. But if someone is going to take a pic of me, personally -- I mean, focused just on me -- I'd think it discourteous not to ask my permission first, especially if it were going to be posted somewhere. I know there are no "rules" against doing it, but I feel about it much the way I do about pics in RL. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowan Amore Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 3 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said: On the one hand, I can't see any possible reasonable objections to a thread featuring pics of other people's avatars. I mean, why not? But there also isn't really a very logical place to put one. GD is a good catch-all I guess. Your joke about paparazzi is pretty funny, but brings up another point, which I assume doesn't apply to Pearl's pics. I don't mind my avi being caught in a sort of general pic of a party, or a dance club, or whatever. But if someone is going to take a pic of me, personally -- I mean, focused just on me -- I'd think it discourteous not to ask my permission first, especially if it were going to be posted somewhere. I know there are no "rules" against doing it, but I feel about it much the way I do about pics in RL. A lot of people dislike having their picture taken and posted by other people. I'm not aware of anyone posting a picture of my av without my knowledge but they may have and I just don't know about it. I have had several people take pics and ask if they could post which is perfectly fine with me. I never post pics of others without their consent. I did mean it to be funny and I assumed Pearl knew the people whose pictures she posted but it's definitely best to ask before posting. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scylla Rhiadra Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 2 minutes ago, RowanMinx said: I'm not aware of anyone posting a picture of my av without my knowledge but they may have and I just don't know about it. I wonder how often this happens? There's no way of knowing, I guess. Like you, I've had people take pics of me -- some have asked ahead of time, and some have not, but they've all given me copies and all asked permission before posting. I did, well after the fact (like, 8 years later), discover -- and this is maybe a somewhat different situation -- that my ex took pics (without my knowing it) of he and I in certain *cough cough* contexts that I'd probably have preferred had not been captured for all posterity? But he didn't, and wouldn't, post them publicly. He's also kept a full archive of all of our conversations, and has on occasion whipped out something I said to him in 2010 that I'd entirely forgotten ever uttering. It's a bit disconcerting. But harmless, as I trust him. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FairreLilette Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 (edited) 37 minutes ago, RowanMinx said: Experiences? How about, Your Friends Paparazzied? Sneaking a shot of your Friends? Smile! While I Shoot Your Avatar! Yesh, this...could be a problem. It's better to ask someone if you can take their picture as well as ask if you can post it on the forum or anywhere. It's just a respectful thing to do. See, regarding paparazzi, it's considered that a public person doesn't have as many rights to privacy as a non-public person. I completely disagree with that. I grew up in Hollywood seeing celebs from the time I was little and they are people with family and friends just like anyone else. I am not a celebrity struck person. The only celeb I gushed over a bit though was John Foggerty whom I met in a hallway. I've always loved Credence Clearwater Revival since I was kid. I just had to tell John that and he thanked me and that was the end of it. Most celebs if I recognize them, I just send a smile and usually get one back. Perhaps I should take my pictures off...? I think I will. Edited November 1, 2020 by FairreLilette 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scylla Rhiadra Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 11 minutes ago, FairreLilette said: Perhaps I should take my pictures off...? I think I will. That's of course up to you, and your own sense of the ethics of it? But I don't think group shots like these are such an issue, personally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleMe Jewell Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 2 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said: So much grumpiness so early on a Sunday! And some of us even got an hour of extra sleep this morning! So, if we examine this logically -- with the important caveat that the forums are not logical -- this thread probably does not belong in this subforum, which is ostensibly about "My Avatar." These pics (which, btw, are pretty good, Pearl) are not of the poster, nor are they really "about" avatars at all. I am not sure that they belong. properly and logically speaking, in the "Portraits of Friendship" thread either. That thread is in the "Creation" subforum for a reason: the idea was exploring how to use photography to capture friendships and connections. And if you look at the pics in that thread, they are not of single people, but rather of friends together, sometimes with collaborative shots that show how different friends have captured the same scene a bit differently. In other words, it's not a thread for pictures of friends, but rather of friendship -- if you get the distinction. I'd argue -- again, applying the kind of logic that frankly we most often ignore here anyway -- that this thread belongs in either the "Make Friends" or "Lifestyles and Relationships" subforum -- although even those are not perfect fits. But hey, we all know how this place works. The thread will be moved and/or removed by the mods if they see fit (which they probably won't, but who knows?). And those who object most to seeing it on their dashboard will continue to ensure that it appears on their dashboard by griping about it, instead of ignoring it and letting it drop off the front page (which might well happen otherwise). Anyway, carry on! Be happy! There's a new thread -- and no one died! From my perspective, based on the comments in the other thread, I don't really think anyone had any issues with who was featured in the pictures. People post pics of their alts and friends periodically in those threads and folks have always seemed fine with it. I think the issue was more with the commentary that was posted with the pictures, which seemed more along the lines of private conversation or role play - to me anyway. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandorWren Posted November 1, 2020 Author Share Posted November 1, 2020 22 minutes ago, RowanMinx said: I'm sure someone will eventually get it moved elsewhere since that's how things go here. I do agree it probably would be better in general or Life Style and Relationships as opposed to YOUR avatar. I also think the knee-jerk reaction would be the title of the thread. Experiences? How about, Your Friends Paparazzied? Sneaking a shot of your Friends? Smile! While I Shoot Your Avatar! This is about showing pics of other people. Of course most likely it will be pics of friends, but not necessarily. I remember seeing some pics someone posted of the so called thinman. If I had been there to take a pic, I would post it here. I started this thread because I've taken pics of others which I really liked, and couldn't find an appropriate place to post them. And it is an experience to me when I spend time with anyone. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scylla Rhiadra Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 1 minute ago, LittleMe Jewell said: From my perspective, based on the comments in the other thread, I don't really think anyone had any issues with who was featured in the pictures. People post pics of their alts and friends periodically in those threads and folks have always seemed fine with it. I think the issue was more with the commentary that was posted with the pictures, which seemed more along the lines of private conversation or role play - to me anyway. You may be right about this. We do have "private conversations" in public on the forum, all the time -- but those conversations are, of course, rooted in the public context of the forum. It is different if you seem to be carrying on a conversation, publicly, that is solely based on interactions elsewhere. Back in the "old days," I can remember this happening to me here -- people referencing private jokes, or posting directly to me as though the main point was to establish, publicly, that we were friends, lovers, or what-have-you in-world. It made me very uncomfortable when it happened, probably because I'm really (oddly) a fairly private person? I'd agree that private interactions probably don't work well on the forum. They are dull, and sometimes "showy." 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FairreLilette Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 (edited) 15 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said: From my perspective, based on the comments in the other thread, I don't really think anyone had any issues with who was featured in the pictures. People post pics of their alts and friends periodically in those threads and folks have always seemed fine with it. I think the issue was more with the commentary that was posted with the pictures, which seemed more along the lines of private conversation or role play - to me anyway. I started to feel odd about posting a picture of my friends without asking. It's just me and I'm just being honest. I think perhaps it's best to let others know you took their pic and are posting it here though. As far as commenting on sexytimes as a poster in this thread calls it, I think that is not necessary for the 'general' forums...it's better just to say 'I love you' or 'My BFF' or something like that because this is a General forum not an Adult forum. There is an Adult section of the forum. Edited November 1, 2020 by FairreLilette 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandorWren Posted November 1, 2020 Author Share Posted November 1, 2020 (edited) I didn't have my partner's permission. We both like to be public, so I went on that assumption. But I did ask the other person first.I always would. Edited November 1, 2020 by Bagnu Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleMe Jewell Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 11 minutes ago, FairreLilette said: I started to feel odd about posting a picture of my friends without asking. It's just me and I'm just being honest. I think perhaps it's best to let others know you took their pic and are posting it here though. I think it partly depends on where the picture was taken and whether or not there was any implied or perceived notion of privacy. Many people take large group shots at public events/venues and posts them, here and/or Flicker and/or elsewhere. I don't have any issues with that. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scylla Rhiadra Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 6 minutes ago, FairreLilette said: As far as commenting on sexytimes as a poster in this thread calls, I think that is not necessary for the 'general' forums...it's better just to say 'I love you' or 'My BFF' or something like that because this is a General forum not an Adult forum. There is an Adult section of the forum. I'd go further, and not because I'm a "prude." There are a kazillion ways of demonstrating your relationship with someone here -- including your sexual intimacy -- without it becoming a public display of your sexual activities. The vanity threads could probably provide all sorts of examples of pics where it is both clear that there is a sexual relationship being depicted, and not done in an exhibitionist manner. The problem with "sexytime" pics (which I find a pretty hilarious term, btw) is that they more or less compel others to be witness to something they have not consented to witness. That's why exhibitionism is a problem in general: you are exposing (literally) people to things (metaphorical) that they have not asked to be, nor in most cases even want to be, exposed to. And, in the case of exhibitionism, it's actually using other people as sexual props -- again, without consent -- because the turn-on for the exhibitionist derives from being seen by others. I'm not familiar enough with the Adult subforum to know if that is appropriate there, but I suspect not. But if it is in a dedicated subforum or thread, where it is absolutely clear that you are going to be exposed to explicit sexuality, then at least the issue of consent is solved, because no one need look if they don't want to: it's informed consent. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowan Amore Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 19 minutes ago, Bagnu said: This is about showing pics of other people. Of course most likely it will be pics of friends, but not necessarily. I remember seeing some pics someone posted of the so called thinman. If I had been there to take a pic, I would post it here. I started this thread because I've taken pics of others which I really liked, and couldn't find an appropriate place to post them. And it is an experience to me when I spend time with anyone. I still think since this thread says specifically Your Avatar, it should be questions or pics about YOUR avatar. Life Style and Relationships would be more appropriate but whatever. It is where it is and I couldn't really care less to be honest. Quietly posting them there? Yeah, probably wouldn't get as much reaction as you're getting now. Or...was that the point? Just an observation. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowan Amore Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 21 minutes ago, FairreLilette said: I started to feel odd about posting a picture of my friends without asking. It's just me and I'm just being honest. I think perhaps it's best to let others know you took their pic and are posting it here though. As far as commenting on sexytimes as a poster in this thread calls it, I think that is not necessary for the 'general' forums...it's better just to say 'I love you' or 'My BFF' or something like that because this is a General forum not an Adult forum. There is an Adult section of the forum. Group pics are generally alright since you can't really tell who is who. Unless you post with nametags visible. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandorWren Posted November 1, 2020 Author Share Posted November 1, 2020 (edited) 4 minutes ago, RowanMinx said: I still think since this thread says specifically Your Avatar, it should be questions or pics about YOUR avatar. Life Style and Relationships would be more appropriate but whatever. It is where it is and I couldn't really care less to be honest. Quietly posting them there? Yeah, probably wouldn't get as much reaction as you're getting now. Or...was that the point? Just an observation. I would be perfectly happy if it was moved. I never thought I would cause such a controversy. Yes, I wanted a reaction...by people posting their own pics!!! Edited November 1, 2020 by Bagnu 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandorWren Posted November 1, 2020 Author Share Posted November 1, 2020 11 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said: The problem with "sexytime" pics (which I find a pretty hilarious term, btw) is that they more or less compel others to be witness to something they have not consented to witness. That's why exhibitionism is a problem in general: you are exposing (literally) people to things (metaphorical) that they have not asked to be, nor in most cases even want to be, exposed to. And, in the case of exhibitionism, it's actually using other people as sexual props -- again, without consent -- because the turn-on for the exhibitionist derives from being seen by others. I like to keep it in areas where I assume other people would enjoy it as well. That's why I have my Flickr pics classified appropriately. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandorWren Posted November 1, 2020 Author Share Posted November 1, 2020 This thread is way off track. Please post some pics. Show off your friends and loved ones, or even those you despise. With permission of course!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandorWren Posted November 1, 2020 Author Share Posted November 1, 2020 5 hours ago, Adamburp Adamczyk said: This is EXACTLY why I have a block list of 7 pages on here ^^ Good. It's called changing the channel or turning the TV off if you don't like the program. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 This is my friend getting ready to decorate her camper: 5 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harper Held Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 3 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said: Yeah. This, I think. There's a bit of irony at work here. Pearl was criticized on one of the pic threads for posting pics of and about her partner. So, she created a separate thread to do so . . . and was criticized for that. Seriously, though Idk who put what in the forum's morning beverage -but I'm saving a link to this thread so that the next time someone complains about SLU VV1 I can share it and say "no, THIS is crazy and flamey". These days y'all make us over there look downright cuddly! The thread is fine; but some people aren't happy unless they're making other people miserable ... 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harper Held Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 18 hours ago, Bagnu said: Btw -I did NOT mean to look like that, heh. I'm using the Tonic "Fine beauty" body and hud which by default has "skin shine" turned on. Which you can see with ALM ...but I rarely have ALM on. For anyone else who may find themselves looking plastic and doesn't think it's fantastic, here's where on the body hud to change it: 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FairreLilette Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 18 minutes ago, Han Held said: The thread is fine; but some people aren't happy unless they're making other people miserable ... I don't know if that is always the motive...to make someone miserable. I sometimes think it's done to get a thread locked and then a Linden comes along and says "too much off-topic" and it's locked. I'll have to wait n see if an opportunity comes along to share as I'm not comfortable unless I ask first. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Talligurl Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 18 hours ago, Bagnu said: Does this mean we have a pet? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandorWren Posted November 1, 2020 Author Share Posted November 1, 2020 1 minute ago, Talligurl said: Does this mean we have a pet? Oh wouldn't that be interesting... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harper Held Posted November 1, 2020 Share Posted November 1, 2020 3 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said: Your joke about paparazzi is pretty funny, but brings up another point, which I assume doesn't apply to Pearl's pics. I don't mind my avi being caught in a sort of general pic of a party, or a dance club, or whatever. But if someone is going to take a pic of me, personally -- I mean, focused just on me -- I'd think it discourteous not to ask my permission first, especially if it were going to be posted somewhere. I know there are no "rules" against doing it, but I feel about it much the way I do about pics in RL. I'm prone to "stream of conciousness" posting, and since I'm experiencing a blood sugar crash irl (having lunch while I type this) this post will probably be worse than usual; you've been warned! Truman capote once said something about "if you don't want your stories talked about, don't share them with a writer"; I kinda feel the idea's the same here, at least to me. If you don't want your photo posted, don't chill with a photagrpher. I also feel like intent and use are huge considerations as well. Bagnu's a friend of mine, so I don't esp mind; particularly since I was in *her house* to begin with! (also, I could hear the snapshots being taken, so it wasn't secret). I'd be a lot more upset if I was in my own place and people were using the camera to take snapshots of me and posting them online. That is a serious breach of privacy. If someone posts a snap of me while I'm visitinig? I'm flattered. If someone posts a snap of me out in public ...that's part of being out in public. The only thing that I think I would mind would be if there was some sort of commercialization. ("Han Held endorses builders bakery! see? she's sitting right there in our class!"). That's an interesting question, tbh; and I'm not sure how I'd handle that. So, basically it's the public/private thing. It doesn't particularly upset me for a few different reasons (being a forum loud mouth, exhibitor and an event organizer makes me a public figure, being photographed and posted is a part of that). I can see how different people would have a different attitude, and if someone does object then the right thing to do would be to take the photos down. But there's a lot of subtleties to the issue and honestly, I take snaps of friends and post them too -usually sending them the link directly afterward. It's part of virtual worlds, and IMO it's fine. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Facebook
Instagram
Twitter
YouTube
Flickr
Recommended Posts
Please take a moment to consider if this thread is worth bumping.