Am I alone??

[Randall Ahren]

 

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Willow Danube wrote:

Randall,

You are so deep, it hurts!

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That sounds like a remark best saved for a well endowed lover.

 

[Anita61 Anatine]

Wow Randall....and maybe you could try on my dress after that? :smileyvery-happy:

You sound like a very friendly guy indeed!

[Willow Danube]

Nah, I think that remark was pretty generic ... sometimes "HEY, how you doin?" IS just "Hey, How you doing?".... You can be pretty deep but sometimes you gotta pull up a little to see the bigger picture.

[Ian Undercroft]

When "playing" SL, I've never really paid much attention to a woman's RL marital status. I enjoy conversing with women (regardless or status or, for that matter, sexuality) who are at ease with themselves, who know what they want and have the self-confidence to go out there and get it.

I'm happily single in RL and it's never been my mission in SL to establish "exclusive" relationships with women. In many respects, women who are happily married in RL and/or happily partnered in SL are something of a dream come true to me, because they are less inclined to put pressure on me to enter into a relationship with them and matters can remain platonic and relaxed and undemanding.

I appreciate that there are many people of both sexes from many and varied backgrounds in RL who, for whatever reason, have a desire to enter "exclusive" relationships in SL. Given that's so, it always causes me some surprise when people suggest they have difficulty in finding a SL partner who shares a similar outlook to their own. One thing that SL offers is a tremendous breadth of choice. 

[Sonja Smedley]

Hello to all!

Well I must say that I really feel alone most of the time when I´m inworld!

At the beginning I met a man and we fell in love very quickly.It became serious also in RL.

We had contact every day...skype, msn, mail, sometimes phone and webcam.

But after a time we had fights almost every day, and because of very silly things.

The problem is, that there is in real life a very big distance between us and to meet each other in real is very difficult to realize.

But however, we were in love and together in SL and RL for a few month and now it is over.

I never made much friends only needed him to be happy, but now I feel the loneliness and it makes me very sad!

I think it is not easy to find good friends here, cause as others said, most of the people are only interested in having sex here.

And  I also made the experience with that sort of men.

I don´t know how to find nice people and every night I tp from place to place and end up sitting alone at the beach, thinking.....!

 

[Syrani Nakajima]

I used to have close friends in SL and I loved that. But now I'm alone too. I started out in 2007 and left for long periods (some months at least) when a couple of those friends -- the closest -- left for good. Now I am back and determined to "make it work" (i.e. I came back to set all my land for sale and instead found myself playing for three days straight and having a great time ...) However, now my friends list is totally greyed out. Now I've forgotten how to meet people.

What's funny is that all the close friends I did make were found during my first week or so in SL. We all gravitated right to the sex beaches because none of us had ever seen anything like that before, LOL. It all started in voyeurism ... But these weren't not at all friendships based on sex. We stood around discussing how ridiculous everyone and everything looked. Then, once the fascinated goggling at people's antics got dull, we moved all to all the wonders of SL (The Far Away and other such places), and the discussions continued.

So I guess the key, and the thing I've forgotten, is all that standing around in various places in SL. It didn't really matter where (though among like-minded folk would be my game plan now). It was all those hours of not having a plan and just standing around talking to anyone. There were many idiots. But among them, a few gems.

Anyway, this is just to say I'm in the same boat as some of the rest of you who posted here. I'm an oldbie walking around all alone in the world. I'm hoping to change that soon. I'm going to take a few classes, go to a few scifi-themed clubs, maybe start role-playing in Toxia or someplace. I've always wanted to do that but was always too afraid to try (since I'm not a gamer and don't really know how to begin). In many ways, despite being so old (haha, from 2007), I feel like a newbie.

[Randall Ahren]

Way cool profile. The force is strong with you. You are a great wizard and have the power to practice white magic instead of the dark arts. Remember the power of oneness, the great circle, the Om and the Aum. It is the place in you where the entire universe dwells, of love, truth, light and peace. 

Consider the power of a single premise: You are whole, complete, perfect and always have been. You are a cloud making up a part of a perfect sky. It is mere illusion that a cloud is separate from the sky.

Finally, the best method for dealing with the insane, is to pretend to be sane. Welcome back.

ps: I think you should participate in the activities at sex beaches and not just voyeur. Try everything, shirk nothing. Don't lie to yourself. It fascinated you for a reason.

[Cio Koba]

Hi everyone!

There are so many things I would like to say about this topic but I can hardly put then all together or in order..

Its funny to see how different people live the same situations, roaming alone around Sl seems to be the fate of many.

Like many people have experienced, for me my closest SL friends would be the people I met at my begginings, bad thing almost all of them have already dissapeared. Good thing my memories about them or the times we spent together will always be with me.

After a long SL pause I came back (have made more breaks but that was the first and the longest) It was a restart, although now I think I focused it in the wrong way, As others have said here thought I had forgotten how to socialize, everyone around just seemed to mind their own bussines, and making new friends was just impossible. I met people, added them to my friend list but they hardly could be called friends. 

Its been almost 2 years from that comeback and things havent changed alot, LOL. At my country we say, any past time was better.  Being alone is not so bad cause it gives you more time to build or explore. 

Happily things arent as bad as they seem, I have found nice people recently, not a group of friends as before but 2 or 3 with which I have good times and enjoy SL. This people just came to me randomly, some started the conversation others it was me who started, but i recomend anyone with solitude problems to take a more proactive aproach. Start conversations at the club, try to build cool things in a sandbox, people will just come and you might just find what you were looking for.

[Pussycat Catnap]

I find myself shier in SL than I was when I was newer.

A lot of those older friends have gone by the wayside.

I spend a lot more time alone in SL than I would like. Back when I started I had the sorts of friends who would just TP in and start bothering me, or vice versa - and just not seeing that so much anymore. It'd be nice to do something about that, but I can't say I'm looking for any male companions (I feel a bit awkward on edge around men - despite my best attempts to get... past my past...).

A few out of world extremely negative experiences in a third party SL-board have left me somewhat intimidated inworld in a lot of places I use to go to for socializing - but which I'd been introduced to by people on those third party forums. When I end up in some of these places, I find myself looking around wondering if any of the people there are from that place. A few of them post here, but I guess moderation's gotten good enough now that they've given up on it.

I think I'm a healing stage on that though - slowly moving past it.

 

I'd say in this thread itself there seems to have been a few nice gentlement for the original poster Danica to contact and begin exploring a new SL together with.

 If you feel alone a lot - the only real solution is to get out there and meet some folks. I had a recent thread here looking for some friends myself, and I did get a few replies and have started up some regular chatting. Though some nice people also contacted me to whom I've failed to get with as much as I should have.

IM everyone in the thread that looks like they might be a good contact for you - and don't stop bugging them.

I do need to take some of my own advice there of course.

 

[Syrani Nakajima]

Randall, I didn't say I "shirked" ... permanently. I was just remembering those early days, rushing over to the sex beach first thing. Like teenagers ripping into those first cans of beer. Eager and amazed and disgusted all at the same time. And the irony that those of us there watching (way too reticent to join in and not sure how we felt about it anyway) later became actual friends, not hookup partners or whatever the kids are calling it nowadays.

Back to the subject at hand ... maybe all of us pack-less lone wolves should throw a huge SL party. I'm there!

[Randall Ahren]

Eager and amazed and disgusted all at the same time is a pretty good summary of sex for me. On the subject of a huge SL party, I know a place that has animations for up to seven people simultaneously. I suspect the lag could get out of hand. However, you probably mean a regular party, which would be fun too. Maybe something on the Blake Sea with boating spanning several sims to keep lag down.

[Violet Wickentower]

Yeah i been in sl since 2008 and i share the feeling with all of you in this forum, sorry if its too long.

I don’t know what happen i was surrounded by friends when i started more then what i could keep up with and lots of attention from guys who were interesting in me. Also i was a part of a family, one of the best experiences to have in sl with other people, but at all change after my last big fall out with the only partner i ever had in sl.

I left for a few months after the big fall out like many ppl have and i came back on a request from my 2 very close friends but when i log in into sl it was like i entered a different world. At first i didn’t think much of it so, I thought i was going to start from the begging and so i was expecting the same things to happen when i was a newbie but no. I tried to get back in contact with some old friends but a lot left and only very few i manage get in touch with but it wasn’t the same there was a distance like i was less than a acquaintance to them, although i still remember them and the good times. So with the few friends still left, which i can count them with one hand, i tried to start again.

 I tried to explore again even started to get back on my old hobbies like being a photographer and creator of clothing, building, and well anything i could make but i still sadly found myself alone. Every one else had separated from me i mean i realize now they have own things to do a new group of friends that they hang out with which i understand but i am like an outcast. I tried to go meet new ppl in chat spots or any where were there was people or got to meet the new people that my friends knew but i was like invisible. May be i was to boring like i totally forgot how to interact with ppl or something. So that totally cut my chances of making new friends if i could get any one to even be interested in talking to me and less likely to even spark the interest of any guys, although is not a big deal or a priority it just would be nice you know.

So now i sometimes log in go look at some clothing store, total hobby too hehe, and find new places to explore like World's End Garden which is such a beautiful place. I have pretty good luck find the most beautiful, interesting, fun, and some times romantic places in sl but as much as i love sharing these places and exploring with some other ppl because it always more fun with other then alone but there is no one at this point in time to do that with since i dont have almost any friends and the few i do aren’t always online. It is kind of embarrass to admit it and look like a weakling but it sadly true and i don’t know why really but i wrote this in here.

I personally don’t want to get bored of sl and  just quit because of this problems but is getting to that. So i guess writing this may help i don’t know how but its a try to find other new people who may be feeling the same way and may be help each other to regain the interest and the will to keep exploring this amazing virtual world Second Life.

P.S. any one is more than welcome to im any time .  Thank you.

[Sonja Smedley]

Hello Violet!

Please contact me inworld, I still feel the same as you and it is even getting worse.

Today I started to think about leave SL behind me cause it always makes me so sad.

I love that game but still most of the time I feel alone there, sit in my houses or be with my pets there.

I´m a really shy person in real life too maybe this is the reason, and I do have very few friends but they are not that often online at night.

I would be very happy to meet you and be glad to become friends.:-)

[Six Igaly]

My spouse doesn't participate sl (anymore).  But even when she was we almost never met in SL. Two lifes with one person was a bit too much for the both of us :matte-motes-big-grin:. During the years i gathered a handful of friends. But even so, i prefer being alone a substantial amount of my SL time, creating my stuff. But i can imagine you might think i am not alone since i have friends where i can rely on, and this is true. What i believe though, some people mix up being alone and loneliness. I for instance, can be alone for days without feeling lonely. And i know several people who has tons of friends and are as lonely as can be (maybe that explains why they hop from partner to partner).

[Erwin Solo]

All the other Avatars are the reason I come here rather than build on the OPENSIM I loaded on my own computer.  There is always give and take in a healthy relationship.  I try to be reasonable.  If you are particularly committed to platonic relationships, then perhaps you could take on an android type shape and skin.

[Syrani Nakajima]

Randall:

Yep, being a man is a tough job. That's why when I go home at night, I like to put on a pair of panties and a nice dress.

 

I know this is an old thread, but I have to say that, Randall, your posts never fail to crack me up. If you need a female platonic blue-haired possibly Cyborgian definitely curmudgeonly wisecracking-yet-sincere BFF to come over and assure you that the dress matches the earrings and the panties match the zeitgeist or whatever, just IM me in world.

[Nancy Hilltop]

I keep some of my activities on second life secret from my man which I love dearly.