DeepBlueJoy

just love the moody, quiet dancer look...

Getting in touch with my inner colorful cat faery...

please don't. Love the look... and btw, what skin is that? I love how 'unhostile' he looks -- too many guys look like they want to hurt someone... my boy toy needs this skin and maybe to steal other aspects of this look. Not every boy needs to look like an assassin with blisters on both feet.

You totally rock... promoting of the droollage...

Yeah, getting nekkid in sand is way overrated. Abraded bits are not sexy. Now nekkid in water... that's a whole different creature... one that purrs and snuzzles you...

Or... they're afraid of you and want to know when you are online. They don't unfriend you because if they do, they might end up somewhere you are by accident. I have not unfriended someone i consider a predator for that very reason. i want to know when they are on so I can try not to be where they might be. When you use block tools, it doesn't notify others... not sure what notice they get if you delete them from the 'show when online' list. Alternately, they may have died like a couple of my friends did, and I only found out by chance months later. Sadly, if someone never logs on again and their family doesn't attempt to log on to their account to tell friends, or don't even know they have an account, they will simply vanish forever. Since you cannot see the friends of your friends, there isn't an easy way to check with them to see if they know something. I gave my spouse specific "notify" wishes, but he's a techie, so SL is not a challenge the way it might be for some others' family members.

Don't forget the flashing shoes!

a little fairy me...

my true colors...

sometimes i dress up and go to space...

First, I'm so sorry for your loss. Widowhood sucks. I think coming back to something you both loved is a great way to honor him, and being in a place where you can have support, distraction and even fun when you need it, and be able to log off of people and being 'on' when you need to be left alone is a good thing. I have found SL to be a healing place. It could be what you need. And of course, the chance for creativity is a very cool thing and this place has lots of opportunities for that. People love it when old and beloved vendors come back. trust me. So many times I find something i love, but the vendor isn't around anymore... so come on back and delight people. Yeah. When I joined SL in 2015 (i think it was 2015!! it feels like I've been here forever!) I thought it was dead.. there was no one here... then I found out that there were people all over if I only knew where to look. I made friends. I got lovely free clothes... eventually, after about 6 months, I decided not to wear the same clothes every day!! I think as long as there are people who can dress up in clothes they could never wear in real life, fly and teleport & wear wings... dance to the music of the 50s, 60s, 70s, and beyond.... and have lots of pixel sex and of course kitty cats😎🐱, there will be some form of second life. I've visited other grids -- they're no second life. No, IMO, SL is not going away anytime soon. And if you come back, there will be one more cool person in second life! Look me up sometime! Blue

Welcome to SL! If you don't know the basics of SL you will need to learn them before you are able to help others. A good way to do this is to volunteer at a newbie island -- then you can help newcomers with stuff you understand, and you'll have more senior people who can help you learn enough so you become a competent user of SL. A lot of the jobs in SL involve helping people who have gotten stuck, and sometimes that will be because they are newbies, or need someone who understands whatever it is they're trying to do better than they do. So... you may not be quite ready for the paid job... just something to consider. Of course, if you are already a whiz with some skill needed in SL, then you're golden... but you will probably need to figure out which area you want to work in and approach the owner/manager/creator directly. Regarding jobs: I would go to your favorite clothing store (or other store if you're not into the clothing acquisition thing) and then write a notecard to the owner and see if they need help. Some store owners hire assistants and/or managers or just people who are willing to come and help their customers via their groups chat. You will of course need to: a) look presentable (unless you are helping out only in the group chat). You will be representing the store in question. b) deal well with others and especially, be helpful c) learn the product (or service if it is a service) d) be willing to occasionally drop whatever you are doing and go to their store to assist someone. Other places that hire are dance/music clubs that need DJs (that requires that you are one and know music) and Hosts... you will need to help people in the club -- and what form that takes will depend on the club owner and/or the DJ you are working with. Again, I recommend notecards to the owner of the establishment unless they are present at the sim in question and willing to talk to you at that time. Often, when you see an owner in their store, they're already dealing with something or helping customers. The notecard is also useful as it gives them your name and availability in a form they may keep instead of an IM that gets lost. If you aren't a friend, they may miss your IM unless they are online (and not busy) when you write them. If you send IMs to busy store owners, they're liable to get capped (SL stops sending messages when a person gets too busy) and often they never get seen... Read how they prefer you to write to them. Many people list this in their profile. Some people do prefer IMs b/c they download their IMs to their computers and get them offline -- but notecards are more the norm. Good luck! Blue

If you want to have broader (natural looking) shoulders, do not get a Maitreya body. It isn't proportioned so you can make the shoulders look natural. It is proportioned for the shoulders to be very narrow. When you widen the shoulders, the arms look more and more skinny and the proportions look odd. Also, the sliders don't really respond as you increase the proportions to try to get a normal shape. I would get the demo body for ALL the major mesh bodies before you buy any... I recommend wearing it for a day or two and playing with the shape. It can take a few tries to get any mesh body to look the way you want. Bodies with reasonable proportions in the shoulders: ebody, slink, altamura. You must, of course, use the sliders to create a shape you like. The shapes that come with bodies are usually based on the aesthetics of the person who designed them and tend to be a bit 'stylized'. Notes: I don't have much of an opinion on the Belleza (sp?) body shoulders, but I think it can probably be made to look ok. I don't remember anything glaring wrong with it. I just didn't like the overall body for my personal image (any of the three versions) so I didn't wear it for very long, but I do remember it being better proportioned than Maitreya. It has been a while since I tried any Belleza body. I believe Eve can be make to look OK, proportionally, but it wasn't one I liked that much either. Haven't tried it lately, it may have been updated. (If you get eve, do not use the Eve shoulder fix, if you want natural looking shoulders - it is designed to make the shoulders look abnormally narrow. apparently, some people like to look as if they are too weak in the upper body to pick up a book!!) I own ebody, slink and altamura bodies on my various alts, so I have played with them a lot. I chose them BECAUSE I can make them look naturally shaped and well proportioned.

I didn't mean it as a criticism, so much as an observation. The guide body (the drawn one), as dated as it is, is a relatively good starting point to make a decently proportioned avi. It's not a rule, but anyone starting with it would do adequately. As several of us have said, there are a number of guides out there... and they are better to use than just winging it if you don't know, which, evidently (just from looking around SL) a lot of people do not. All the best.

escalated (hair) has one.

The avi here is not obeying the rule. The head is quite a bit smaller than it should be - if you look at the drawings, you'll see what I mean. The head should fill up the square. It's subtle, but it does make a difference. Actually, the avi is not proportioned like the drawings at all... it is 'squat' compared to the body in the picture, though it is more or less within normal parameters, it could be more flatteringly proportioned. The neck is too short and the hips are high b/c the legs are longer by proportion than is usual. That last one is variable in normal people, however. I am short-waisted, and my inseam is the same as my husband, who is 4 inches taller than me. (I'm all leg :-) )

I'm sorry, I am very ***** (particular) (apparently the 'a' word is a dirty word!) about trying to have proportions that look human in SL --- but in my experience with various meshes, standard and various shapes -- and avatars in both genders what I have found is VARIABLE. There is NO magic number that will work for everyone. Also, if you wear a mesh body, the sliders aren't all set to work or to respond predictably. In general, they are configured according the skill and prejudice of the maker. One maker told me that she maxed out the torso slider response at 50% for women (even when you have it set at 100%, the mesh will not look different). This means her mesh isn't for me as I find her bodies spindly on top, even when you have huge breasts... you have thin arms and a very 'girly' shoulder profile that simply isn't remotely natural though it is all over SL. This is compounded by the short arms and tiny hands that a lot of people are running around with. The fact that I was an athlete in younger life and have well developed shoulders, arms and legs and that I LIKE my (30 year old version) actual body meant I had to keep looking. Anyway, I digress. Heads: I do believe most people -- and this is even more true of most males than females btw -- have heads that are way too small for the proportions of their bodies. They rock the 'pin head' look. So many people have small heads, that most people don't seem to notice it after a while. This is further exacerbated by the fact that most people are more muscular than humanly natural (male) or have (often much) bigger than normative breasts. Add to this a neck that is almost always wrong in proportion to the body (mostly too short and too slender for women, and just plain too short for men). It is NOT flattering and it's not found in nature (at least not in people we consider well proportioned). A lot of factors affect your head's appearance (and even how big it looks) -- this includes how you have configured the various head sliders, what mesh head you are wearing and even what hair you tend to wear. Also impacting your head/body proportions will be your body's proportions. Rule of thumb: We aren't 50% anything... many people take the shapes they get and then use as is. The result for many people is a too small head, too short arms, tiny hands, big hips, narrow shoulders and ***** (breasts) under their chins. Avis that if human, would barely be able to pick up a package! Unless you purchased a shape that is locked, you probably will need to adjust it -- and your head needs to (usually) be in excess of 60% on sliders, unless you are creating a tiny avi. I think mine is somewhere north of 70% and my neck is also a lot longer than any native shape provides (so my ***** aren't under my chin). Having a long neck in SL makes our too tall bodies look proportionally 'normal'. No, I'm not saying you must give up your fantasy body! We must have our fun, after all! 🙂 However, if you want one that is humanly pleasing (if a bit 'improbable'), you need to meet at least a few parameters. Most people - including most women have shoulders that are at least somewhat WIDER than their hips. Yes, even women. Pear shape tends to mean your torso is narrower, but genuinely narrow shouldered women whose shoulders are noticeably smaller than their hips are RARE. Many women in SL are triangular in shape, with shoulders that are significantly smaller than their hips. This isn't biomechanically likely... or practical. Our arms fall at our sides... we're not towers with very short arms that slope outward. The reason is that our shoulders are wide enough that our hands fall naturally next to our hips... straight down. Unless you are obese. There are proportion charts all over the internet -- so you can roll your own look if you'd like -- but for those of us who don't want to make a study of it, there's help in SL: The very best body proportion guide I've found to this in SL is from Strawberry Singh. https://strawberrysingh.com/2013/06/24/whats-your-digits-take-3-proportions-challenge/ (BTW: also buy her (1L) ankle lock off the mp while you're at it, if you're female. Your ankles will look normal when you sit. You're welcome!!) Second Life Marketplace - StrawberrySingh.com by Strawberry Singh Most makers of mesh, makers of shapes and makers of skins are reflecting what pleases them aesthetically. Some of them have zero clue about actual human proportions (though thankfully, this has improved). The limits of creating a body from pixels also are a factor, as is the skill of the person creating the body. All of what this adds up to may not look right for what you're trying to create. This is why it really does pay to ask for help. Best of luck!! Blue NOTE: I've studied human anatomy in both art and nursing school - so I come to my anatomy obsession by a lot of observation of how the human body works bio-mechanically -- what bodies ACTUALLY tend to do. As I said, I was also a fairly serious athlete when I was younger.

I AM DeepBlueJoy, Blue to my friends. That is all you need. I live 'somewhere' (usually) -- some days I exist between dimensions.😼 I don't even invite most people to my house in SL... RL is a bridge waaaay too far. (If I get to know you well, I may eventually tell you which country I live in.) I've actually met a couple people from SL -- but I went to visit them in a public place (one was in hospital). Why, yes, I am paranoid. If you have a problem with this, I will probably have a problem with you. 😸 Your attitude will be cheerfully shredded in the chipper-shredder in hell! Blue skips off to the wild indigo yonder, singing rock and roll at the top of her lungs!😺

that was the name of the group I couldn't remember hairsl -- several stores I've been to have hair gifts for people who are members of this group, including, (last time I looked, anyway) Escalated.

(Most of the stores listed below can be accessed inworld from their MP page SLURL) I totally recommend going to MP and just searching 'hair' and taking a look. There's a lot out there!! The fact I didn't write a lot about some of them doesn't mean they aren't good - most of these are favorites - but I kinda have to go make dinner! Several decent hair makers have freebies or dollarbies either in store or on MP so you can try their hair. This is not an exhaustive list, just a list of good stores that you can use to get an idea of what you may like. Most good hair has at minimum a color HUD. newer hairs often have style HUDs too. Most of the hair below either come with available funky color HUDS or the ability to edit the hair color yourself via texture b/c i like to do that. Nearly all of them come natively in 'normal people' hair colors. 😸 ______ The hair I'm wearing is rezology, available in MP, in their own store (last time i looked was a few months ago) and also in a few satellite locations (I think ADN was one of them, but don't quote me. You can try out demos from MP or the other locations -- colors do not have to be funky, that's just my thing. You can make any hair any color you wish. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/121179 You will find several of their hairs for 1L - this gives you a good idea of what to expect from their hair. This is my favorite hair maker. Some people find the complexity too high, especially for their older hair, but I love their textures. ______ If you like streaks and bi colored hair (if you are industrious, multi-colored hair!!) in unusual styles, braids, etc, you may want to try Escalated (funky is the rule there) braids, half and half hair colors, and the wildest and best thought out color palettes in SL (including hair not found in nature, not even with dye!) https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/135414 Highly recommend visiting her actual store. She has lots of gifts and lots of lucky letter boards and Midnight madness (all group member only) but if you like her hair, it is worth joining. She tends to set the group free around Christmas and then give out advent gifts, which is a good way to see if you like her stuff) If you like funky, this is the store for you! There will be some freebies for other hair/fashion groups in the store as i recall. ______ Alice Project - older store, not sure she's still updating, but has some good freebies, discounts, and a variety of cool hair with a variety of good HUDs. i recommend visiting the inworld store for free hairs with your SLF&O group or mini mania. Midnight madness seldom locks anymore. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/139874 ______ No.Match is good middle of the road (and great support for both women and men) https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/174575 A ton of group gifts with a (paid join) of her group. Most, if not all hair has a male and a female version, which is very cool, b/c there isn't enough good male hair out there. Come with color HUDs, in mostly conventional colors, but nice and rich colors. A few hairs have unlocked textures if you want to funkify your color palette like me! Regular giveaways. ______ Great (mostly female) is Truth Hair - lots of their new hair has style HUDs (you can move hair back or forward for example). All have color huds. The first decent hair I ever got in SL -- they gave out boxes of their older hair on one of the newbie sims I visited and that was my hair until I was ready to start spending money in SL https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/13 The fact that the store is number 13 on MP, suggests it's been there a very long time. Anyway, they have thought out the hair thing long and well. YOU CANNOT GO WRONG HERE. Store can be laggy, but you should go anyway and check out their discount hair as well as all the various styles available, and see the HUDS they come in. ______ Little Bones - I love them! They have both style and color HUDs. Style HUDs on newer stuff. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/87784 Doesn't appear to have anything on the MP right now, but did have a group gift when she did. As far as I know, store is still there. Visit store for Midnight Madness (no group). Also has hair/accessory gachas. Great collection of group gifts with paid group join. ______ Exile - I love my colors, I love fun styles. They have both. Men's hair as well. Periodic gifts. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/17591 great hair, great huds, fades etc. ______ Sinktiklia Was my default hair for a while. Only Truth and Rezology can also say that. They also do great make up. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/179492 Visit store for Lucky letter boards. (no group) Lots of group gifts (paid join) ______ Ali&Ali - Old and probably needing updating but available a lot of places and with plenty of give aways at their locations - hair for men and women and both curly and straight hair is supported. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/9759 If you need hair for ANY purpose, there's a hair somewhere in their vast catalog that addresses your need. You may not like it all, but there's a lot of variety. I needed 'bad hair day' hair for a dance, and yes, I found crazy hair! ______ Argrace Graceful, lyrical hair for men and women. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/106802 If you like natural looking hair that falls well, this is for you. I think they may be Japanese. They have a refined sensibility. ______ Analog Dog - simply the best curly hair in SL. Great styles. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/13404 They used to have a 'hair ball' free on their sim with some of their hair. If it is still there, it's worth the search. _________ Curious Kitties. Hair for the anime in you. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/13404 Colorful. Still haven't figured out their HUD systems. HUDs are usable by multiple hairs.

what if you have windows 8.1? thanks

the irony of adult vs gen is that I have been to lots of busy G sims and see lots and lots of naked people... b/c lag undresses them. It happens less to me now my computer is one with a dedicated graphics card, but I was amazed at the amount of nudity in SL until I understood why... I perma alpha certain regions of my body, even with my body matched clothing to avoid that nudity in the eyes of others. Doesn't work when I'm wearing appliers... then I just get nakeded... but appliers tend to show up faster, at least in my viewer. The only unfortunate thing about setting your land so no one can see in and you cannot see any one out, is that chance meetings of your neighbors becomes less likely and those can be fun. I would probably enjoy the new land since you already have it, keep your 'no see ums' settings turned on -- and when the opportunity arises, move to a moderate or adult location just to keep things simple. I don't know what the rules are about abandoned land, but all the abandoned land near me has remained unoccupied (which makes me happy). I imagine at some point it will be up for sale again, particularly if it is a rational size, but it seems to take a while for linden to get around to making it available. If you are lucky, it will take them a good long while :)

Truthfully, most of the people i know in SL are over 50. I think it depends on what you're interested in. I think if you hang around certain type of activities, the crowd tends to skew younger, but the fantasy and building/landscaping/making stuff crowd that I know are mostly folk over 40 and the majority of those are 50 and above. Many work in tech or tech adjacent areas. I find younger people when I look in areas that cater to things like killing zombies or for some reason, in some newcomer areas. Since most of my interests tend to fantasy stuff, landscaping etc., I meet a lot of people in my age group. Few people wear 'older' looking avatars, so that's not a good way to judge.

I had a friend whose only way of fixing this was to reinstall her viewer. She checked EVERYTHING. SL can be odd.🙄

For folks in search of free female mesh bodies with feet and hands attached: The best free mesh bodies in existence IMO, are Ebody and Altamura. (These aren't just demos, you can keep wearing them) Both can be made to look really good, and depending on the skin you choose (DS is my recommendation for matching). LAQ is also an option. You cannot use skin appliers with most free mesh bodies, but if you look around, you can find skin that has a similar undertone and which will match decently. I find the ebody much easier to use, especially if you aren't used to mesh bodies. The alpha HUD of the Altamura is more extensive, however, so if you unusual or asymmetrical clothing, it may be the way to go, but there will be a learning curve. You will have to look out for when Altamura have free offers (you probably will have to join their group ~50L to get the 'free' body). The Ebody is available all the time and it is 1L. Heads: If you don't have a lot of money, I wouldn't get a mesh head at all. If you'd like a basic bento mesh head that can be made to look lovely for 500L - the Normie head is available on the MP -- it has omega installed, nothing extra to fuss with, install or buy. Omega make-up is everywhere and omega skin appliers work. I am wearing a normie head btw. LAQ skin appliers. I tried several much more expensive heads, and found I preferred this one for its very pleasing look. Note: free mesh bodies do not usually work with appliers. This is a nuisance if you use them a lot, but you can find work arounds, mostly mesh clothes that don't need them. You also cannot wear nail polish on your toes and fingers on most free bodies (they are appliers) but Slink shoes will fit either the Altamura or Ebody. The Ebody is available in a curvy and regular version. Regular works well with most clothing out there, even with the basic alpha system. For a paid body, I'd recommend the Ebody, the Altamura or slink depending on your final appearance goal. Slink bodies have a lot of stuff already made for it and slink shoes are the template from which nearly all shoes are designed. I think all of these bodies are far superior to the Maitreya body. IMO, Lara is mostly popular, b/c it was the first body to figure out a usable HUD. Since people make clothing for it, it is easy to find clothing. It is NOT the best proportioned body of the lot, even after adjustment. IMO, the best proportioned body award goes to Slink... but both ebody and altamura have slink beat in the HUD department. Sadly, Slink's HUDs need updating. At this point, i would stay away from TMP (the mesh project). Everyone I know with TMP bodies has changed to something else. Just buying their body is a hassle. E-body free and Altamura free are available in world. Normie head is on MP. Altamura also has free male bodies. They look great! Ebody does not come with a head. Since I'm not fond of Altamura heads (very hard to edit if you don't like the original flavor), this is another reason I prefer Ebody. Most, but not all Altamura FREE bodies come with heads that cannot not be detached. One of my alts wears the free ebody with a normie head. I wear a normie head with a Slink body ( and hands and feet). Another alt wears an Altamura body and head (one that came with omega capability - a steep discount on special -- not free ~400L). Omega was an extra purchase. Look around, be patient. Good luck!