Jump to content


  • Content Count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by DeepBlueJoy

  1. I have just decided to create an MP store because I've been making some clothing and want to share it. I also have some random gacha items I haven't done anything with and I think it would be weird to have those intermingled with my clothing... and distracting, particularly since the purpose of the gacha selling is to get rid of stuff -- I don't plan to run an active gacha business. I've mostly stopped buying gachas. So, once I have a moment, I think I will create a second 'gacha' store and put my random stuff in it and give it a completely unrelated name. I may even just put it up with my other avatar, but that could be a pain, since I'd have to transfer everything to her... Hmmm,... no, maybe not... just getting it out of my inventory is kind of appealing, so I may do it anyway. My other avatar has a very empty inventory, lucky thing! Blue begins transferring random stuff...
  2. sounds like you need to open a trouble ticket with Linden
  3. ignore idiots. live and let die. block, derender, move on.
  4. Child avatars squick me, particularly the ones that look like ~2- 8 (those that really look child/babyish). I don't get the need to revisit childhood, but then again, mine sucked and I have no desire to repeat that much powerlessness or give up parental controls to some stranger on the interwebs... If someone finds healing in that, great for them. I have found that learning to trust others takes time and surrendering all my control to them right off doesn't usually serve me. My main issue though is that the first place I encountered child avatars was at Michigan Shack, a perveyor of all things sexual. (Pretty sure they didn't welcome these avatars, but they came anyway). Pretty sure they were there with 'parents' but regardless, it left a sick feeling in my soul as a sex abuse survivor. I've seen them (usually 'tots') in all sorts of child-inappropriate places. Occasionally, they actually seem sexualized, sometimes on leashes. Frequently, they behave like unruly children, something that I tolerate adequately with real children because they're children and would rather not experience in an 'adults only' environment, though I never go to any of them for sex. Sexuality and children should not EVER mix. Not even faux children. What two little real kids do out of curiosity is one thing, but adults and children, and sex, is vile and sick and destroys people. There was a long time in my life when I would rather have been murdered. Death ends pain. Thing is this. I know they're most likely played by someone fully adult in age. So it is unlikely to be anything but a violation of perception, though we don't actually know who anyone is here, do we? So for their existence -- live and let live. Around me? I prefer to avoid them. Except, as I said before, I have that one friend who appears to feel most comfortable in his garb as a unsexy but friendly looking 12 year old. I also know a few people who have been 'pregnant' and who have 'families'. I don't 'get' this play act thing, but nothing 'weird' appears to go on. I mostly ignore it as I like the people in question. I didn't really grow up playing with baby dolls in real life, so maybe that's why it has zero appeal. Bottom line, I won't judge or condemn anyone who wants to be a child avatar or have 'children'. They don't condemn me for having blue hair. I will vigorously condemn anyone who brings a child avatar into any adult* space and especially if they bring them in contact with adult (sexual) activities... even if they are played by adults. NO ONE should be allowed to normalize that behavior, because it is fundamentally destructive. I've counseled a lot of sex abuse survivors in 30 years of recovering, and I've yet to meet anyone who wasn't destroyed inside, whether or not they acted out or became addicts. Besides anything, isn't portrayal of children doing things sexual illegal under US law -- even if it is just a 'depiction'? *by adult, I mean any space where there's adult activity of a sexually provocative nature - not limited to actual sex, such as naked sexy dances. There are a number of 'A' sims that aren't really 'adult' in the sense of being places for sex or provocative nudity.
  5. If we never think of the complexities and the possibilities, nothing ever changes. There are valid concerns to be addressed, but there are also changes that would make life better for a lot of people. I think if we don't discuss the things that don't work and how we'd like them to work, we cannot even BEGIN to look for solutions. So... I'm putting out all my ideas... what I hope and dream for, and what makes my life difficult -- putting it out there so we can talk about it and try to come up with work arounds and even completely new ways of doing stuff. One thing that I want the folks at linden to consider, is a way for someone to leave their avatar's possession to another person. This is not for trivial reasons. If two people run a business or manage a group of sims together and one of them dies, there are a lot of complicated issues involved if (for example) a lot of inventory or creative materials belonged to the person who died. If they could will the contents of their avatar to another, then it would not be necessary for someone to spin up the avatar of a dead person in order to keep a business going -- or try to re-buy resources that simply may be irreplaceable. Since families often have nothing to do with people's second lives, it's not outside of the realm of possibility for an overzealous spouse, parent or child to just delete their family member's account and all that is associated with it, never even knowing that their family member has others they answer to. A member who knew they were dying might (I suspect it happens more often than one might suspect) simply give their password to a partner and that's an informal (but in my opinion, potentially problematic, not to mention painful) solution. If I had that option right now, there's a person I would will my account to. then if at some point, (with certain specific occurrences and proofs/documentation), my heir could take over my account and either move its contents to their own, or use it at their discretion. digital wills exist in some spheres. Like the real thing, the whole process is complicated, but it exists for a reason. The other permission stuff I won't address right now. I'm thinking a lot about this one in particular b/c the shortness of life has been brought home to me very recently and the potential messes are quite significant.
  6. Yes some of it is complicated. But some of it is possible, Blue
  7. but I don't want to clothe my alt and steal anyone's money. my friend was out of town, never went to an event. I cannot give him or her the item, even if it's no copy. It is not always POSSIBLE to buy the item you want to give away. Sellers leave SL. And you have a perfect item for SOMEONE ELSE that you cannot give them... something they can NEVER buy anywhere. Sometimes I get something I have no use for -- I have been given things by people and I have a friend who wants the item and i don't care if i lose it completely... but I cannot transfer it at all... I either have to keep something that is useless or toss it, and watch my friend have to buy it. Or worse, my friend can never buy the item b/c the vendor is long gone from SL. I seldom buy no copy items, but if i do, surely I should be able to give those away if I never intend to use it again? I don't understand people who sell things that are both no copy and no transfer. A friend in SL is dying in real life. She has a lot of lovely things from being here for a long time. Most of them she cannot give away even though she will be dead soon and she cannot use them in the afterlife. So a real life person cannot pass on something when they will never be able to use it again in second life because they're dead. I'm sure her closest friends would have loved some one of a kind item of hers to remember her by. I really like the idea of a 'transfer all copies' permission. Or maybe a way to turn off use of any copies if you transfer the item. If I were dying, I would like my entire inventory to go to my bff in SL. She would have my avi transferred to her anyway, so anything i have like houses would be hers to use, but sometimes it's easier to rez stuff in your own name and I have some killer clothing that I would love someone to be able to use. No matter how close we are, I seriously doubt she would want to wear my avatar if I were to die.
  8. I try very hard not to buy anything that is no copy. I don't like losing stuff, period. I have some exceptions and I always worry when they're rezzed that what happened to a friend (a big sim crash) will happen to me and I will lose stuff from sellers who may not even exist anymore or who might not want to redeliver stuff... assuming I can prove it was mine. Not everyone has perfect records and even on my parcel, i don't think I could list everything that was in my house if it all went away. Modify is harder. I like to have modify b/c resizing matters to me and with stuff like hair, being able to change hair color is also helpful. I've also modified every house I've ever lived in that allows me to mod. I like repainting. Retexturing is a great way to make one's home unique without adding lots of prims. The idea of being able to join things together in a single outfit has quite a bit of appeal. I have (especially with costumes of various kinds) run up against the limits of attachments and it is annoying. I'm not fond of resize menus for this reason: occasionally I will find myself kicked off a sim b/c they have scripts set very low. Having just a couple of things with resize scripts really messes with life. Particularly if the item is no copy, so you cannot just delete the script b/c some things have to be resized repeatedly depending on what you're wearing them with.
  9. Hating auto unpackers is great if you have access to land. If you are new or don't have money for land, you have to find (ever rarer, it seems) a sandbox to unpack or try to do it the hard way by attaching whatever it is to yourself and trying to dig the contents out. Most inexperienced users don't know how to do that. I do agree about the animated gestures though... I just want a simple 'accept' and done. I don't need sounds or special poses. No one needs to know (loudly and with bright lights) that I'm opening boxes. I tend to unpack the stuff in the auto unpackers first, and sometimes forget the boxed up stuff entirely. I can be anywhere and quickly clean through all my new stuff easily when it's auto openable.
  10. I am usually kind of uneasy with adults playing children, but to each his/her own. As long as no sex or sexualizing is involved, that is their business. As someone else said, sexualization of children does seriously bother me. Why a grown woman would want to be a six year old in world is a mystery to be. Been there, did that in real life, and I really didn't like it all that much, but that's me. That aside, I have one friend who presents as a tween male -- he looks like a 12-14 year old boy. I think he likes being free of the whole 'he man' and masculine stereotype issues. He doesn't act babyish or even childlike and doesn't present in any way that is squicky. Just long pants and a loose t shirt and a boyish appearance. We are friends because we have things in common that don't involve any role play aspects -- stuff i have no interest in. But I cannot imagine pretending to be anything I'm not, though I am very much into fantastical costumes. I think he plays that avatar for the same reason one of my female friends most often appeared as a small animal of some kind (she had various). She admitted she'd gotten tired being hit on and on trying to figure out how to 'look right' (mostly according to some very judgmental female people). Since I was pushed to 'go mesh' and hit on repeatedly from day one to present, I know there are pressures that can make people want to join some 'alternative' category. For me, however, I cannot imagine choosing to look like a child. In my earlier days, I was often asked if I was a child avatar b/c i started out by setting my real height on the sliders, and this 'average' height made me a tiny person in SL. I'm still shorter than average, but apparently, not quite short enough to be asked if I'm a child avatar.
  11. I think it depends on the nature of the group. Store groups, I don't see a reason to hide unless I am being stalked by someone and want to just hide my presence everywhere. But if you're in a 'sensitive' group - for example: AA or NA for recovery or a suicide survivor's group or some health issue or even a fetish, you may want to hide that group membership from others because you don't want random people knowing you are ill or have a particular sexual interest or you are a recovering addict. Were I a business owner in SL, I might seriously consider hiding some or all of my groups. When you own a business, you get a lot more traffic to your profile, and where you shop, what groups you buy your templates from, whether you have MS or something like that... is really not your customers business unless you want it to be. If you have a customer who is unhappy, they could also follow you to whatever group you're in and make you miserable or even lie about you. Everyone's different. Some people let everything hang out there. Some people prefer to keep their business private just on principle. There are also people who wish their groups were invisible but don't know how to hide their groups. Learning how to use SL's tools can be a job of work!
  12. RELATED ITEMS: If you have completely unrelated items to sell - for example, Skin/shapes on one hand and houses/landscape items on the other, you may want to consider two stores. I don't usually go to a house/homewares/landscape place looking for heads and skins. It would never occur to me to look for them in the same place... OTOH, I do occasionally go to a store that sells 'everything' - Lamu/Alb - comes to mind, but I shop them almost exclusively in world. It is set up a lot like a middle eastern bazaar, so you expect to find everything including the kitchen sink, but they are the exception. It works because it's an in-world sim. The only other store I go to that sells 'everything' is Zyn, but they're also a pretty unique place. In general, if you have related items, even if they are wide ranging, I think one store is less confusing and will keep your brand visible. PERMISSIONS: People who sell both full perm and non full perm stuff should probably have two store fronts in MP unless they mark them VERY clearly. I've found myself almost buying items I liked, only to realize they aren't full perm. When I have my creator hat on, I'm not expecting clothing for personal use to be intermingled. I would be pissed if I bought a limited permission item by accident. In world, I would hope the items were clearly marked and sold from separate vendors. TBH, if you market yourself well, and you sell good stuff that is good value for money, people will buy it regardless of whether you have two store fronts or just one. if you're one person doing all the work, managing multiple separate spaces may just be making extra work for yourself. If you have help, separate spaces seems like the best way to go. Since people grow and learn, and may start out making one thing and eventually expand to a variety, I think it depends on the business owner. Just try to label as carefully as possible so people can find what you have, whichever approach you choose.
  13. You could try the normie head. Omega already installed. Bento. https://marketplace.secondlife.com/p/UTILIZATOR-Normie-Head-DEMO/13071630 That's for the fully equipped demo. The head is 500L and responds better to the sliders than most of the 'famous maker' heads, which are designed to look a very specific way and very hard to get to look like 'you' may want to look. I love it. I have a dozen different head, including a catwa. I always go back to this one. If you want to know more or would like to see someone wearing it, reach out to me here or in world. Blue In addition to omega ready skins, you can get Omega evolved BOM tester free at the omega store to put on any BOM skin you'd like and you can also wear any slink applier by getting the slink converter from Omega.
  14. Rezology has some long braids and at least one dreadlock hairstyle. They're on MP only at present. The owner is Selc. The store name appears to change periodically, but hair itself is labeled as rezology so it will come up in search, then you can click on the store.
  15. Yes, but not a partner. (I don't do 'SLex or relationships' in SL). I've met two friends from SL in RL. I knew both over a year before, and the initial meeting for both was a public place, even though both said they were women. I am trusting, but also careful. They were (as I was pretty certain they would be) exactly who I thought they were, but I've found life less complicated when I watch my back. Meeting them in person has enhanced our friendships in both cases. Most people in the world are nice and lovely. Occasionally, however, we do meet crazy people, and online, you can't always tell who is a dog, or a snake, though there are clues.
  16. Welcome Back! Please look for me in world or leave me a message here!
  17. Sorry, man! If you need help, drop me a line and I will share what I have learned working with my "manvi"
  18. Even harder to find is hair for black men. Not every black man wants the bald base or dreadlock look. Truthfully, if i were a guy, any race, I would feel unwelcome in SL. Even hair stores that used to have men's hair have eliminated, reduced or simply not updated their selection. There is dorky old hair, but even that is getting thin on the ground. I have helped several guys set up their avis, but even things available a year ago are now gone.
  19. True. But sometimes people have no choice. Either struggle with ye olde laptop, or don't visit SL.
  20. Maxing out the connection speed (the opposite of what you are supposed to do) greatly sped up my computer. There is a theory behind it, but i dont remember exactly, but it works for me and others who use it. (You can google how to speed up second life, btw) Set LOD to 2. If you cannot see the bad LOD objects, that is on the maker. Even with my current computer (a decent, but older laptop with dedicated graphics, 16gb, core i7, ss hd,) that i usually can run on ultra, 2 LOD makes a difference. I run ultra but keep my draw distance low. 80-168. Sometimes, less. Have you looked at refurbished computers on newegg? (Can come with full warranty - do check) You can do very granular searches and compare deals. A refurb may halve your computer price if you look carefully and don't rush to buy. Dont limit yourself to things called 'gaming' laptops. You can find the same features for less under "laptop". Search for features, not labels. Check your scripts. You can be your own issue. Edit: when i had my previous laptop, it tended to overheat & slow down. Consider a $20-30 cooling fan. Mine attached to the exhaust vent and helped a lot. Mine was Opolar vacuum fan and i loved it. You will have to get one that fits your computer's cooling system.
  21. Newcomer island @ lawst paradise sim has two i really like. Neutral and no weird "smell your feet" animations or bunny hop running or uber sexy wrigglebut designed by someone who thinks women are ridiculous! They have a bunch but the two i like best are called 'casual lady' and 'confident lady'. They also have some nice male and unisex ones. They are packaged in some of the ugly newbie 'complete' avatars. (Dont forget to vist the real old stuff on the boat. Some is cringy, but some is useful or just fun. The pre packaged avatars are not much, but they have a number of solid AOs - i would urge her to pick up several different ones. There are other fun things for newbies on that sim, including a gallery on the sim. It is a pretty manageable space to negotiate. Lawst paradise - http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/Lawst Paradise /218/30/25 I have tried others but five years in Casual Lady is what I wear. manvi wears "shy man" or "calm man"
  22. TL;DR version. I like my Slink Physique body and I'm sticking to it. If i ever had to change, it would be ebody, b/c both of these bodies can achieve decent normal proportions. I own Slink Physique because after trying all the major bodies and many, many, many minor ones (and building shapes for each of them) before i bought the Slink, I decided it was by far the easiest to make look like a normal, well proportioned body. The breasts and curves and crotch gap all look like a normal person could have them. Some of the other bodies look like cartoons, even especially when you try to proportion them like real humans. Some of them have a ridiculous bias toward huge hips and breast melons, and if you make them anything but emaciated, you cannot have NORMAL width shoulders or arms that aren't skinny sticks. This is not a look I have any use for. Those proportions, if they existed in reality, would result in a woman who could barely lift anything. Weakness and uselessness in a woman is not sexy to me. Many SL bodies are biomechanically improbable. Some are just impossible and look deformed. None of my friends have huge heads, tiny shoulders, and flipper hands with giant rears and 'headlight' sized melons...😜🙃 Nope! It's unlikely I would change my body. The only thing about the physique that I am less than thrilled with is the way the alphas work on the HUD. I wear some 5 size mesh b/c I do a lot of fantasy/unreal stuff and some of those clothes were made by people who are long gone from SL and unlikely to update and some of them are exquisitely made. Unlike some of my friends, I don't resize my body. I created a body to reflect my 30 year old self - though I was more athletic than I look in SL. Sadly, there is NO body or skin combo that I've found that looks like a female, feminine, ELITE athlete. Apparently, we must all look like porn stars on steroids or fainting maidens who cannot lift a pebble. Unless someone creates a body that can have muscles (but isn't a muscle bound fugly weightlifter body) I'm unlikely to change. I actually stayed with my system body for a long time because I could make it look more muscular, but after a while, I wanted a smoother less jagged look. When i wear my fallen gods skins, I wear the male part of the body skin with the woman's head applier - one reason I'm not all that turned on by BOM for skin. Most 'normal' male skins don't work as well, however because apparently, the SL male is supposed to be part monster! If I bothered to buy another body it would probably be the ebody. Runners up would be some of the better Altamura bodies (my alts have Altamura or ebody) or Belleza. There are several that I would never buy, either for weird proportions or unreality or for the lack of quality of their HUDs. Ease of use matters to people. Realism matters to some of us too.
  23. Hi... I know how hard it is to find really nice stuff for men in general, but it seems to go double for black/African American avatars. I'm trying to help a friend create a decent one that doesn't look like a caricature or a big 'monster' urban thug creature. (truly hate that look) Any suggestions that you might have would be appreciated. Also looking for clothing that would appeal to someone who appreciate things from Africa and the Caribbean in particular. NOT looking for the 'ghetto' or 'thug' look. Looking for something a bit more refined - something friendly and pleasant but manly that a normal person would like to go around wearing. Thank you much!
  24. It's funny... when I play with 'manvi' I channel the person he was designed to be... my late RL partner... and even my BFF here notices the difference in my tone and my word choices. But I think it's because I made him to remember someone... not sure how it would work if I were trying to go out and 'get some' though... i would never... bc that just would feel... icky In RL he would have enjoyed flirting, so I flirt with gilrs sometimes... which is easy for me as i'm bi anyway and I don't have a RL outlet for that and I know he would not mind if he's up there looking down, I bet he's wishing he lived long enough to join SL he loved playing online.
  • Create New...