Pride Month In SL -- A Bad Experience

[Love Zhaoying]

Just now, Sammy Huntsman said:

I mean if someone didn't like my presentation, I wouldn't let it ruin my day. As I know there are gonna be people who like it. And knowing that makes me happy. 

Great attitude!

[Sammy Huntsman]

Just now, Love Zhaoying said:

Great attitude!

Thankies!!! 

[Love Zhaoying]

1 minute ago, Sammy Huntsman said:

1 minute ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Great attitude!

Thankies!!! 

Sure, I'd gripe about it - but eventually you learn, that bringing that into this Forum will only result in drama and chaos:

"What did you expect?"

"What does LGBT have to do with mantras?"

"How dare you mention LGBT anything, anywhere, anytime!"

"Japanese? The alphabet is clearly Korean!"

"LGBT is all about sex!"

etc. 🙂

OMG I feel sorry for Luna!  Must..resist..

 

 

[Luna Bliss]

4 minutes ago, Sammy Huntsman said:

5 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Luna successfully hijacked a potentially positive discussion about Pride by complaining about people not liking her presentation.

That's actually quite an accomplishment!

 

I mean if someone didn't like my presentation, I wouldn't let it ruin my day. As I know there are gonna be people who like it. And knowing that makes me happy. 

This isn't about my presentation really...it's about Pride in SL and how others react to it.

My presentation was basically a Pride presentation within my singing class.

[Persephone Emerald]

2 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

She was speaking about her RL husband, and how they both agreed how wrong it was for proud gays to introduce an artist and refer to their sexuality. She didn't understand how other gays do this as a source of pride, like "hey, see the good people in our group can do"?  If she understood,or cared, how denigrated gays still are in many parts of the world (including the US) she wouldn't say such a thing.

When people from marginalized groups have to stay quiet about their life experiences, thoughts and feelings because drawing attention to themselves might upset someone else, those other people can never understand the numbers or experiences of the people in those marginalized groups.

[Love Zhaoying]

Just now, Persephone Emerald said:

When people from marginalized groups have to stay quiet about their life experiences, thoughts and feelings because drawing attention to themselves might upset someone else, those other people can never understand the numbers or experiences of the people in those marginalized groups.

Back in the closet, you!!!

[Scylla Rhiadra]

1 minute ago, Sammy Huntsman said:

I mean if someone didn't like my presentation, I wouldn't let it ruin my day. As I know there are gonna be people who like it. And knowing that makes me happy. 

I don't think it's a question of letting it "ruin" your day.

As I understand it, Luna organized an event that was actually up-front advertised as being related to, and advocating for, Pride.

2 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

A note card was passed out to many groups before the event, and so most attendees knew what this was about.  Plus, they can click a sign upon arriving and get the note card as well, and I also announced at the beginning of the event what the focus would be this week --  songs by LGTBQ+ artists and their allies.  Here's what it said:

           MOONLIGHT MANTRAS PRIDE VERSION
            
~~~ June is Pride month so we are celebrating with songs by and for the LGBTQ+ community and their allies.

[❤]Those in the LGBTQ+ community often have trouble cherishing their romantic relationships due to the bigotry that frequently surrounds them, so here we validate songs by and for the community as well as romantic love in general for everyone.[❤]

And one of the people who chose to attend, who knew, or certainly should have known this, announced publicly that she found "gay" icky.

Maybe I'm missing something, but this isn't a case of someone being unexpectedly "ambushed" by a "political" subtext. This is someone who deliberately went to an event about something with which they disagreed, and then proceeded to make a point of expressing their disagreement.

And that is deliberately disruptive and provocative.

 

[Luna Bliss]

9 minutes ago, Sammy Huntsman said:

I mean if someone didn't like my presentation, I wouldn't let it ruin my day.

It didn't ruin my day. It didn't ruin my class (others liked it). We're discussing Pride and what it means in SL -- I'm happy.

Edited June 16 by Luna Bliss

[Sammy Huntsman]

1 minute ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Sure, I'd gripe about it - but eventually you learn, that bringing that into this Forum will only result in drama and chaos:

"What did you expect?"

"What does LGBT have to do with mantras?"

"How dare you mention LGBT anything, anywhere, anytime!"

"Japanese? The alphabet is clearly Korean!"

"LGBT is all about sex!"

etc. 🙂

OMG I feel sorry for Luna!  Must..resist..

 

 

See I wouldn't, I would realize that it's just an opinion and that yeah I may not like the opinion or even agree with it. But they have a right to it. But beyond that, I would just move on and let my presentation keep going. As I know there are others who enjoy it. 

 

2 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

This isn't about my presentation really...it's about Pride in SL and how others react to it.

My presentation was basically a Pride presentation within my singing class.

But the thing is, you made it about your presentation. If I were trying to create a forum post like yours. I would pose a question, not go off on a rant about how something for me was ruined. I mean you could have said it in a reply to yourself and even talked about your other experiences with pride in SL. 

[Cristiano Midnight]

1 hour ago, Starberry Passion said:

I am referring to people that you cannot please. They saw you play a Korean song, that wasn't doing or hurting anything and yet they were upset about it. I'm telling you you can't please everyone and that they will never be happy no matter how much you try. There are LGTBQ that are normal people and then there are the few, small group who are just negative.

This was a non-gay person complaining about using the word gay, which triggered her fear of the icky sex stuff.

[BilliJo Aldrin]

3 hours ago, Paul Hexem said:

The real question is, if it's a mantra class about love, what does being gay have to do with it all? Isn't that like saying "You throw pretty good for a girl." or "That's an impressive jump for a white guy." Like, is she stand out because gay people are terrible at mantras, or something?

People are tired of having other people’s membership in the alphabet family thrown in their faces, yea,  you are gay, lez, bi, trans, whatever, so what?

[Sammy Huntsman]

Just now, BilliJo Aldrin said:

People are tired of having other people’s membership in the alphabet family thrown in their faces, yea,  you are gay, lez, bi, trans, whatever, so what?

But the thing is, it wasn't thrown in this person's face. From what I gather, this was explicitly explained in a notice. So she could have chosen not to go. 

[Luna Bliss]

2 minutes ago, Persephone Emerald said:

2 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

She was speaking about her RL husband, and how they both agreed how wrong it was for proud gays to introduce an artist and refer to their sexuality. She didn't understand how other gays do this as a source of pride, like "hey, see the good people in our group can do"?  If she understood,or cared, how denigrated gays still are in many parts of the world (including the US) she wouldn't say such a thing.

When people from marginalized groups have to stay quiet about their life experiences, thoughts and feelings because drawing attention to themselves might upset someone else, those other people can never understand the numbers or experiences of the people in those marginalized groups.

Some do understand and are even allies.  And only through discussion and having Pride celebrations can we hope others might get it too.  This is how society changes...even our little SL society.

[Scylla Rhiadra]

Just now, BilliJo Aldrin said:

People are tired of having other people’s membership in the alphabet family thrown in their faces, yea,  you are gay, lez, bi, trans, whatever, so what?

Then it would make sense that you chose not to attend Luna's event.

Those who did chose to. You are in the fortunate position of being able to choose NOT to.

An optional Pride event that you must proactively decide to attend is not "throwing" anything in your face. Ignore it, and leave them be.

[Luna Bliss]

3 minutes ago, Sammy Huntsman said:

8 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

This isn't about my presentation really...it's about Pride in SL and how others react to it.

My presentation was basically a Pride presentation within my singing class.

But the thing is, you made it about your presentation. If I were trying to create a forum post like yours. I would pose a question, not go off on a rant about how something for me was ruined. I mean you could have said it in a reply to yourself and even talked about your other experiences with pride in SL. 

Or I can present it as I did.  I'm happy with it.

 

[Persephone Emerald]

2 hours ago, Rowan Amore said:

You should probably find better places to hang out in SL.  Almost every single post you make has reference to people hating on someone for being short or thin or Asian or whatever.  THAT is why I give a.lot.of your posts my WTF reaction.  I've yet to run into any discrimination in SL against my height or color or anything.  I just don't think it's as common as you keep saying.

And people wonder why other stay off of social media.  Must be 100s of times worse than the forums or SL because I just do not see it.

Given the quotes, I thought Starberry was referring to specific poster on these forums.

It's ironic how people from one marginalized group may sometimes denigrate those from another marginalized group.

[Sammy Huntsman]

1 minute ago, Luna Bliss said:

Some do understand and are even allies.  And only through discussion and having Pride celebrations can we hope others might get it too.  This is how society changes...even our little SL society.

I mean it really doesn't help that people and I am not saying all. But some people in the community, are very openly sexual. If they want to do their kinks and fetishes, that is fine and I am all for people exploring that side of themselves. But some people have made it a very public affair, which can give people the wrong idea. 

[Cristiano Midnight]

3 minutes ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

People are tired of having other people’s membership in the alphabet family thrown in their faces, yea,  you are gay, lez, bi, trans, whatever, so what?

Again, saying someone is gay is not throwing it in your face. Do you get tired of people who say they are Christian or some other religion?

[BilliJo Aldrin]

Just now, Scylla Rhiadra said:

Then it would make sense that you chose not to attend Luna's event.

Those who did chose to. You are in the fortunate position of being able to choose NOT to.

An optional Pride event that you must proactively decide to attend is not "throwing" anything in your face. Ignore it, and leave them be.

I meant in general, not that particular example. 

And dont worry, you wont see me at any Pride events, so its all good. 😁

[CaithLynnSayes]

I just read the original post, not the 6 pages after. I might later, but probably not. - I have a whole lot of opinions on all this that would make me extremely unpopular. So i will share a few.

First of all i would like to address this: 

5 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

Many don't have any notion of the disadvantage this minority still encounters and think it's totally about sex, even in SL

Could you name me a single one please? Before you do, please don't say that there are people that don't like certain minorities and i'll tell you why. Your OP is all about one single person having an opinion on what you did, one person. They did not like what you did and even said that "they find sex icky". That right there should be your indication that this person isn't the one that should get you down or discourage you in what you are doing.

On the surface it is very sweet what you're trying to do. But you make a fundamental mistake here. You allow one single person to discourage you, or to use your words "It really floored you" that this person had an opinion. You know that saying about opinions, right?  Everyone has them. It's up to you what you do with them, or how you deal with them.

I, for example, have a lot of unpopular opinions. Specially with Americans. For example, I'm a live and let live girl. I do not care what you look like, what you do, what you sound like, or who you like and are attracted to. I really don't care. What i do have a problem with, and in this case with the "LGB-I forget the rest" is "forced acceptance". Please allow me to explain before any of you lunge for my throat. This minority of whom you speak has a certain tendency towards other people. I have experienced it myself several times. Here within SL. As an example i would say the pronounce thing. I find this utterly confusing. The fact that gender and sex apparently are a separate thing is a strange one to me, but i'm sure that would probably make me a minority in itself. I'm however willing to go along with that. If you want to call yourself certain word, have at it. But, big giant but. where i draw the line is "compelled speech". It is absolutely not ok to force other people, that don't take part in your way of life, to force them to use an unusual set of pronounce. It is right here where this minority loses a lot of respect, and sadly the only thing this minority has to do then is to yell loud enough and people get "canceled", lose jobs and get "doxxed". I personally think this is a problem everybody knows about but in this day and age is absolutely forbidden to talk about. Another example of minority that tends to do this is to forbid one ethnic group to use a single word while the other ethnic group calls each other it constantly. You've all heard of the most recent "incident" with that girl doing the cooking video on that cancerous social media app. The context in how she said it doesn't matter, she said it, therefore ATTACK! Side note, this ethnic group that isn't allowed to speak that word, is the one that invented it. Fun little fact, but i digress.

My point is simply that this minority supposedly is all about love and acceptance. Unless you say something they don't like. Then they become like sharks smelling blood in the water. So i can't but wonder, love for whom? I'm not saying everyone in this group is like that, but sadly, and undeniably, a vast majority is. And what you said doesn't even have to be an insult or talking down to them, or whatever. If it is not part of the group think ideology, it is by definition bad.

I'm Central European but i know an awful lot about America and even have quite a few friends there. I know what's going around in America. Not a unique feature, i'm aware. That country is in the spotlight a lot. One thing that is really obvious to the rest of the world, but perhaps not to Americans themselves is, how far you have drifted away from live and let live and actual love for each other. Today it really feels like anything has to be forcefully accepted. Forced acceptance never works. There have been numerous studies done on that. I really think it is important for this minority to try and see that how they want things (My way, or the highway... Sorry, but it is.) doesn't work. It has the opposite effect. How this is not basic knowledge these days, is beyond me if i'm honest.

 

So Luna. Keep doing what you think feels right and don't let one single person "floor" you. Me, i personally don't care what people think of me, or the things i have to say, and you know what? I like it that way. If what i'm doing or saying is hilariously bad or just plain wrong, i will know. People would go against me very hard and then it is time for me to reflect and think to myself, what am i doing? Is what i am doing a good thing or not. I think an awful lot more people need to stop and think a little bit more. I think then we will get somewhere.

Edited June 16 by CaithLynnSayes
One single typo, can you believe that? I'm so proud of myself!

[Sammy Huntsman]

Just now, BilliJo Aldrin said:

More than a few gay/lez people have had it with trannies.

One gay woman was saying on a video I saw that she regretted marching for gay rights. she was marching for respect and equality.

She expressed her disgust at the trans community and what they are trying to do.

See this is why I have separated myself with the modern trans community, I mean prior to 2010. It was pretty quiet and people accepted it. But then again, I am one of those transpeople who want to be left alone and just live my life. Without all this negative press on both sides making me look bad. 

[Scylla Rhiadra]

OFFS

[Istelathis]

8 minutes ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

People are tired of having other people’s membership in the alphabet family thrown in their faces, yea,  you are gay, lez, bi, trans, whatever, so what?

How often is it thrown in your face?  I mean, earlier today I went out for a walk and gay jumped right out of the bushes, and clung to my face... how rude!  I tried desperately to free myself from it, but it was forcing me, suffocating me with it's wokeness, finally it leapt from me on to some other innocent bystander that was just minding their own business.    

I'm tired of being persecuted!  🤣

Realistically, it is not thrown in our faces.  People tend to pursue the subject then get upset, that is the Internet for you though.  I typically do not see LGBT stuff very often, but that is probably because I spend most of my time searching around the web for hobbies.  In real life, I might see a flag here and there, but nothing that leaves the impression that it is being thrown in my face.

[Love Zhaoying]

8 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

11 minutes ago, BilliJo Aldrin said:

People are tired of having other people’s membership in the alphabet family thrown in their faces, yea,  you are gay, lez, bi, trans, whatever, so what?

Then it would make sense that you chose not to attend Luna's event.

Those who did chose to. You are in the fortunate position of being able to choose NOT to.

An optional Pride event that you must proactively decide to attend is not "throwing" anything in your face. Ignore it, and leave them be.

Some use ANY mention of LGBT, Pride, etc. as "thrown in their face".  

People even attend such things on purpose just to complain and protest. (Rev. Fred Phelps' church famously protests at all Pride events in the US.)

I hope that this experience convinces Luna that we need MORE allies.  Heck, if someone complained under these circumstances I'd seriously consider banning them.  But then again, I'm Demisexual and throw it in people's faces.

 

[Cristiano Midnight]

3 minutes ago, CaithLynnSayes said:

I just read the original post, not the 6 pages after. I might later, but probably not. - I have a whole lot of opinions on all this that would make me extremely unpopular. So i will share a few.

First of all i would like to address this: 

Could you name me a single one please? Before you do, please don't say that there are people that don't like certain minorities and i'll tell you why. Your OP is all about one single person having an opinion on what you did, one person. They did not like what you did and even said that "they find sex icky". That right there should be your indication that this person isn't the one that should get you down or discourage you in what you are doing.

On the surface it is very sweet what you're trying to do. But you make a fundamental mistake here. You allow one single person to discourage you, or to use your words "It really floored you" that this person had an opinion. You know that saying about opinions, right?  Everyone has them. It's up to you what you do with them, or how you deal with them.

I, for example, have a lot of unpopular opinions. Specially with Americans. For example, I'm a live and let live girl. I do not care what you look like, what you do, what you sound like, or who you like and are attracted to. I really don't care. What i do have a problem with, and in this case with the "LGB-I forget the rest" is "forced acceptance". Please allow me to explain before any of you lunge for my throat. This minority of whom you speak has a certain tendency towards other people. I have experienced it myself several times. Here within SL. As an example i would say the pronounce thing. I find this utterly confusing. The fact that gender and sex apparently are a separate thing is a strange one to me, but i'm sure that would probably make me a minority in itself. I'm however willing to go along with that. If you want to call yourself certain word, have at it. But, big giant but. where i draw the line is "compelled speech". It is absolutely not ok to force other people, that don't take part in your way of life, to force them to use an unusual set of pronounce. It is right here where this minority loses a lot of respect, and sadly the only thing this minority has to do then is to yell loud enough and people get "canceled", lose jobs and get "doxxed". I personally think this is a problem everybody knows about but in this day and age is absolutely forbidden to talk about. Another example of minority that tends to do this is to forbid one ethnic group to use a single word while the other ethnic group calls each other it constantly. You've all heard of the most recent "incident" with that girl doing the cooking video on that cancerous social media app. The context in how she said it doesn't matter, she said it, therefore ATTACK! Side note, this ethnic group that isn't allowed to speak that word, is the one that invented it. Fun little fact, but i digress.

My point is simply that this minority supposedly is all about love and acceptance. Unless you say something they don't like. Then they become like sharks smelling blood in the water. So i can't but wonder, love for whom? I'm not saying everyone in this group is like that, but sadly, and undeniably, a vast majority is. And what you said doesn't even have to be an insult or talking down to them, or whatever. If it is not part of the group think ideology, it is by definition bad.

I'm Central European but i know an awful lot about America and even have quite a few friends there. I know what's going around in America. Not a unique feature, i'm aware. That country is in the spotlight a lot. One thing that is really obvious to the rest of the world, but perhaps not to Americans themselves is, how far you have drifted away from live and let live and actual love for each other. Today it really feels like anything has to be forcefully accepted. Forced acceptance never works. There have been numerous studies done on that. I really think it is important for this minority to try and see that how they want things (My way, or the highway... Sorry, but it is.) doesn't work. It has the opposite effect. How this is not basic knowledge these days, is beyond me if i'm honest.

 

So Luna. Keep doing what you think feels right and don't let one single person "floor" you. Me, i personally don't care what people think of me, or the things i have to say, and you know what? I like it that way. If what i'm doing or saying is hilariously bad or just plain wrong, i will know. People would go against me very hard and then it is time for me to reflect and think to myself, what am i doing? Is what i am doing a good thing or not. I think an awful not more people need to stop and think a little bit more. I think then we will get somewhere.

There is a lot to unpack here, but the biggest mistake you are making is conflating tolerance and acceptance. You don't have to accept anyone's way of life, as their life is not predicated on your acceptance. Tolerance is something different. Someone not liking gay people or the word gay isn't the issue. It is when people use that dislike to actively try to marginalize a group because of it. That level of intolerance crosses into the live and let live territory you are speaking of.

Something we keep seeing right now in 2024 in America is during Pride events, pride flags are being burnt and micro-*****ed assholes in big trucks are peeling out on pride crosswalks and things to deface them, then posting it proudly on social media, to be cheered on by the anti-LGBT masses. It is a scary thing out there for gay people who still do get beaten up and killed in America and around the world soley for being gay.

Acceptance is nice to have but not needed. Basic respect and not having your existence demeaned and legislated away is what is needed. It is scary time - the world is moving backward, not forward. The path of progress is not a straight line, but this part of the pendulum swing is unnerving.