I decided to make my Second Life a tad bit easier. I disabled incoming IMs from "non-friends" for some of my accounts.

[Zalificent Corvinus]

3 minutes ago, Jordyn McGregor said:

Yes this one does....usually cos their size and physics make it virtually (no pun intended) impossible to miss them!!!  Two puppies fighting in a sack!!!

Like some of the physics system layers on ancient system "curvy" avatars, they walk in, stop in front of a vendor board or whatever, and you feel this overwhelming urge to walk over and say

"Excuse me Miss, but you appear to have left the motor running when you parked your ass"

[Luna Bliss]

3 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

7 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Not sure why this shifts to the need to blame someone or find fault. 

Suggestion: Read Paul's line of questioning, and then read my responses, and then read them again and again and again, until maybe you understand. 🙂

more likely I would just lapse into a coma...

[Paul Hexem]

30 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Yes, the entire conversation of "why some avatars get more attention than others", is completely irrelevant.

I think discussing the "why do some people suffer from this when others don't?" could be helpful in finding workarounds or solutions to reduce it.

19 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

more likely I would just lapse into a coma...

Would that be better or worse? I can never tell.

[Ayashe Ninetails]

2 hours ago, Paul Hexem said:

Sure, that's why I mentioned my one friend that used to get hit on a lot and has only dialed up the look since then.

Is it possible that avatars like my friend's and @Rowan Amoreand others just aren't as attractive as they used to be? Sure. My bet though is that posts like these are borne of selective memory, like when we only remember bad experiences over mundane ones. 

I'm not sure what memory has to do with it. Gopi mentioned being hit on a lot with his female avatars and turning off his IMs to get some peace - that all sounded fairly recent by my reading of the first post.

At any rate, as to attractiveness, you're asking me about what men find attractive? *gigglesnorts* I don't know, but I do know SL beauty standards have shifted a bit (don't they always?), so tall, lanky girls are kind of *out* these days. I doubt my old look would still be receiving attention right now.

[Luna Bliss]

25 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

46 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

more likely I would just lapse into a coma...

Would that be better or worse? I can never tell.

It depends on how much amusement I find in yet another attempt by you to assuage the 'man-shaming' you rail against.

[Paul Hexem]

1 minute ago, Luna Bliss said:

It depends on how much amusement I find in yet another attempt by you to assuage the 'man-shaming' you rail against.

(Un?)fortunately female shaming gets shut down pretty quick or I'd rail against that, too.

[Luna Bliss]

36 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

1 hour ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Yes, the entire conversation of "why some avatars get more attention than others", is completely irrelevant.

I think discussing the "why do some people suffer from this when others don't?" could be helpful in finding workarounds or solutions to reduce it.

This blames the victim though -- you're seeing it from the perspective of an individual and what they need to do to prevent it. People have differing experiences based on random chance though (based on where they happen to be at any given time), and usually it has nothing to do with the behavior/dress of an individual.

Edited April 10 by Luna Bliss

[Love Zhaoying]

54 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

more likely I would just lapse into a coma...

Warning, comas are bad for the toes.  Nobody wants comatoes.

And, some men are lacktoes intolerant.

 

[Luna Bliss]

3 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

5 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

It depends on how much amusement I find in yet another attempt by you to assuage the 'man-shaming' you rail against.

(Un?)fortunately female shaming gets shut down pretty quick or I'd rail against that, too.

The problem is that you conflate 'facts' with 'shaming'.  It's simply a fact that men are more aggressive on all levels, including sex, and this is why we see many women complaining about unwanted advances. Gopi can see this clearly via assuming a female identity, and I wish more men could have this experience too as it would generate some empathy.

[Love Zhaoying]

1 minute ago, Luna Bliss said:

men are more aggressive on all levels

ALL men? Oh, my.

 

[Luna Bliss]

3 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

4 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

men are more aggressive on all levels

ALL men? Oh, my.

Not all men, but many more men that women are aggrressive (likely due to testosterone and upbringing).  It's why women are murdered 10 times more than men are (by their romantic partners).  Thankfully we don't have murder in SL, but we do have stalking, and I can't tell you how many women have to put up with male stalkers (yes...there are female stalkers too, but the majority are men).

Edited April 10 by Luna Bliss

[Love Zhaoying]

* renames thread to "Battle of the Sexes and Pop-Psychology" *

[Love Zhaoying]

It's just misandry, pure and simple.

I'm SO disappointed.

 

[Paul Hexem]

3 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

This blames the victim though -- you're seeing it from the perspective of an individual and what they need to do to prevent it. People have differing experiences based on random chance though, and usually it has nothing to do with the behavior/dress of an individual.

Empowering people to help themselves, or "blaming the victim" should be done way, way more often. It's not done enough. It's no different than saying you'll get less wet in the rain if you bring an umbrella.

 

3 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

The problem is that you conflate 'facts' with 'shaming'.  It's simply a fact that men are more aggressive on all levels, including sex, and this is why we see many women complaining about unwanted advances. Gopi can see this clearly via assuming a female identity, and I wish more men could have this experience too as it would generate some empathy.

That you phrased this whole thing as a fact before @Love Zhaoying called you out on it is exactly why I gotta pick on you.

[Zalificent Corvinus]

2 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

It's just misandry, pure and simple.

If only people used more telescopic sniper scopes, they would miss less often.

[Love Zhaoying]

2 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

That you phrased this whole thing as a fact before @Love Zhaoying called you out on it is exactly why I gotta pick on you.

If we weren't so darn aggressive, as ALL men are (it's a FACT), then we wouldn't argue so much about all these proven, factual psychological facts.

[Zalificent Corvinus]

Just now, Paul Hexem said:

Empowering people to help themselves, or "blaming the victim" should be done way, way more often. It's not done enough. It's no different than saying you'll get less wet in the rain if you bring an umbrella.

Meanwhile:

A Testostoxitard wrote:

"See, it's all your own fault for being a WOMAN, your place is in the kitchen making babies, not using a computer and having opinions as if you are entitled to them, sort your self out! Stop disagreeing with your Masters, it's BLAtANT MISANDRY!"

[Love Zhaoying]

3 minutes ago, Zalificent Corvinus said:

6 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

It's just misandry, pure and simple.

If only people used more telescopic sniper scopes, they would miss less often.

What ammo and gauge does a misanthrope use?

 

[Paul Hexem]

Just now, Zalificent Corvinus said:

Meanwhile:

A Testostoxitard wrote:

"See, it's all your own fault for being a WOMAN, your place is in the kitchen making babies, not using a computer and having opinions as if you are entitled to them, sort your self out! Stop disagreeing with your Masters, it's BLAtANT MISANDRY!"

Well, to be fair, generally you won't get wet from the rain in the kitchen either.

[Luna Bliss]

6 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

That you phrased this whole thing as a fact before @Love Zhaoying called you out on it is exactly why I gotta pick on you.

Uhhh...we've talked about this before.

I challenge you to dress up as a woman and roam around the grid like our OP did.  You'd develop some empathy FAST.

[Zalificent Corvinus]

1 minute ago, Love Zhaoying said:

What ammo and gauge does a misanthrope use?

 

Some folks swear by .50 cal BMG APIT ( Armour Piercing Incendiary Tracers )

Personally, in SL, I find the Cheese String SMG more than enough, but for hardened targets, the Squid Launcher works quite well.

[Luna Bliss]

7 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

20 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

This blames the victim though -- you're seeing it from the perspective of an individual and what they need to do to prevent it. People have differing experiences based on random chance though, and usually it has nothing to do with the behavior/dress of an individual.

Empowering people to help themselves, or "blaming the victim" should be done way, way more often. It's not done enough. It's no different than saying you'll get less wet in the rain if you bring an umbrella.

IKR....if only women would cover up their legs like they did in Victorian times.

[Cinnamon Mistwood]

2 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

Well, to be fair, generally you won't get wet from the rain in the kitchen either.

/me wipes the spray of coffee off her keyboard 

 

[Love Zhaoying]

12 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

It's why women are murdered 10 times more than men are (by their romantic partners). 

U.S. 2022 stats for murder victims by gender - Men: 14441, Women: 4251

https://www.statista.com/statistics/1388777/murder-victims-in-the-us-by-gender/

I guess you had a reason to only focus on murders by romantic partners.

 

[Luna Bliss]

4 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

19 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

It's why women are murdered 10 times more than men are (by their romantic partners). 

U.S. 2022 stats for murder victims by gender - Men: 14441, Women: 4251

https://www.statista.com/statistics/1388777/murder-victims-in-the-us-by-gender/

I guess you had a reason to only focus on murders by romantic partners.

Yes, but the men you cite here were mostly murdered by other men...not women.  So my point still stands -- men are more aggressive on average.

Edited April 10 by Luna Bliss