Jump to content

Scylla Rhiadra

Resident
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    20,073

  • Joined

  • Days Won

    184

 Content Type 

Everything posted by Scylla Rhiadra

  1. Scylla Rhiadra
    I said "choices" because there's no way to know what motivates someone -- unless, of course, they tell you. It's wrong and stupid and simplistic to assume that someone who refuses to "verify" is catfishing you, and it's equally faulty logic to assume that everyone who wants verification is homophobic.
  2. Scylla Rhiadra
    So much angst about this. Second Life is called Second Life for a reason -- not "First Life But with Cartoons." The old slogan, and the one most of us remember and still see as central to the place, is "Your World, Your Imagination." Both of these things underline the degree to which your self-representation need not be, and should not be expected to be, the same as your RL identity. And we can add to that the fact that disclosure of RL details about someone else is literally against the ToS. I think it's fine if you want to know RL details, including (dodgy) verification of their gender/biological sex, about someone you are getting involved with. Wanting something is a right. We can't, and shouldn't, police thoughts and desires. But wanting to know someone's RL information is not the same as having the right to expect or demand it. If you're entering into a romantic or sexual relationship with someone, and you are really hung up on their RL equipment, then, sure, go ahead and ask for some form of verification. BUT don't make assumptions about someone if they refuse to provide it, and DON'T villify them or insult them. They have their own reasons for not providing it, just as you may have your own reasons for wanting it. And those reasons are none of your business. Move on, and find someone who is willing to do that for you. It's surely that simple? If one person in a potential relationship wants RL verification, and the other won't provide it, they are simply incompatible. So, find someone else who is. I am sure that some who insist upon voice verification -- and interestingly, yes, I've literally never heard of a woman demanding this -- are doing so because they are deeply insecure about their own sexuality, or just outright homophobic. I'm equally sure that there are some who insist upon it who are not homophobic. I'll use myself as an example, with an anecdote I've repeated here before. My first SL boyfriend turned out to be a woman in RL. (He later transitioned in RL into a trans man, but that's not immediately relevant.) Had I known that this SL man was (and identified as) a woman in RL, I would, frankly, not have been interested in a romantic or sexual relationship. That's not because I am homophobic: I just am not wired to find the idea of having sex with a woman appealing. (And let's admit it, sex in SL is very much about "the idea" of it.) But when he "came out" to me as a RL woman after our relationship had ended, I was very surprised, but not horrified, mortified, or offended. Our SL relationship had been, for all intents, a completely heterosexual one, sexually and in every other way. His RL genitalia had zero impact on how we interacted. I found our relationship, including the sex, satisfying and engaging at the time, believing he was a man; how silly would it be to decide in hindsight that it hadn't been? Had I been looking to extend the relationship into RL, I wouldn't have "demanded" verification, but I likely would have ended it when I found out about his then gender and sexual identity. But that's just because of my personal sexual and romantic orientation, not because I hate lesbians. (We're still, I might note, very good friends.) I think we need to stop reducing this to black and white or either/or equations. Sexuality and identity are complicated. So are our self-representations in SL, and there is a huge diversity of both. Accept that diversity! And if someone's approach to RL and SL identity is incompatible with your own, move on. There's no need to judge them for it: accept their choices, just as you likely expect others to respect your own.
  3. Scylla Rhiadra
    That only makes sense if the new rules being instituted were identical for trans women and trans men. The fact they are not is an unmistakable sign that something else is going on.
  4. Scylla Rhiadra
    At one time the filters were converting part of the legacy SL name, "Sweetwater," to asterisks. Let's see if that still happens . . . ETA: Ok, they fixed that. It used to become "Swee****er"
  5. Scylla Rhiadra
    Oh, thank you! This is lovely -- and inexpensive!
  6. Scylla Rhiadra
    The 2-year ban explicitly applies only to trans women; I've found no mention of a parallel penalty levied against trans men. FIDE also has a different new policy regarding the retention of past titles following transition: "4.1. Titles. If a player holds any of the women titles, but the gender has been changed to a man, the women titles are to be abolished. Those can be renewed if the person changes the gender back to a woman [...] If a player has changed the gender from a man into a woman, all the previous titles remain eligible." This is presumably because mens titles are more "legitimate" than women's ones: a trans man can't "pretend" that titles won while representing as his biological birth sex (i.e., female) "count" once he is representing as a man, with the implicit assumption that this is because titles awarded to women don't mean as much, and it would be misrepresenting their value to allow a trans man to claim them. Yeah. It's stupid. Yep!
  7. Scylla Rhiadra
    Wonderful pic. I'm becoming increasingly fond of wide aspect ratios.
  8. Scylla Rhiadra
    So, my friends and I are doing a style challenge again this week -- this time not involving a specific garment, but rather trend: Balletcore. Balletcore can run a whole spectrum from very elegant and sharp to straight-out punk or goth. This, however, is what I chose to do. (I meant to add credits, but forgot to write it down! The top is by Ison, and the skirt is Miss Chelsea, and the scarf is I forget.)
  9. Scylla Rhiadra
    Full report please!
  10. Scylla Rhiadra
    I can get in, but I can't rez. I'm also half naked because it wouldn't attach items. Ooops.
  11. Scylla Rhiadra
    Same.
  12. Scylla Rhiadra
    The International Chess Federation (FIDE) has decided to effectively ban trans women from chess competitions for up to two years, and will strip players who have transitioned of the prizes previously won because . . . . . . um, trans women have a natural "advantage" at chess over cis women? Due to . . . testosterone? Or something? Peeve: Misogynistic, transphobic idiots.
  13. Scylla Rhiadra
    On a lighter (?) note, peeve: Time.
  14. Scylla Rhiadra
    Yeah, I really don't think there's a permanent solution to this: public parcels on the mainland, and especially ones with political associations, are going to attract this kind of attention. And the SLRR is certainly an additional problem -- although he found ways to grief Flagg as well, where that wasn't the issue. Fortunately, as I say, it's an annoyance more than anything else. And this land is more important to me than it likely is to him: I can outlast him. And thanks for your sympathy! I'll survive!
  15. Scylla Rhiadra
    I am absolutely certain the AR process gets abused, a LOT. In fact, about 14 years ago, the founder of the group was the victim of a targeted AR for age pl*y, and had his account frozen for about 2 weeks while they "investigated." (It was of course restored, and his account is still around and occasionally active. But that was at the height of the moral panic about the teen grid, the new rating system, etc.) And yes, again, I really don't have the desire, interest, time, or energy to get into shooting war over this. And I certainly don't want to weaponize a system that I think is, or should be, reasonably important.
  16. Scylla Rhiadra
    Well, it's the group he's targeting probably more than me -- although it may at this point have become a bit personal. He's hit two of our parcels, on different continents, in the past, so moving it would likely be ineffectual -- unless perhaps we moved to an estate. And even then . . . This particular plot has been owned by the SLLU since 2005 -- it was the group's first real presence and "HQ" in-world -- so it has some history, and I don't want to lose that. And the fact that it's on the public Heterocera Atoll SLRR is also one of the reasons I want to keep it: it has more visibility there, and I do get occasional "walk by" visitors as a result. I also just don't want to let him win by pulling up stakes and moving. This is annoying, but not as annoying as relocating probably would be!
  17. Scylla Rhiadra
    It is mainland, yeah. I didn't know about the self-deleting thing, but, yes, he's doing it when I'm not there. And then drawing my attention to it because *whee! Look at me, edgy, subversive, and scary!*
  18. Scylla Rhiadra
    It's LPDW land. Or Linden-owned, anyway. This is Heterocera.
  19. Scylla Rhiadra
    I'm assuming that's not what Persephone was going to suggest, as I don't think she's the vigilante type. But yeah, I have zero interest in waging a war here. I just want this to stop.
  20. Scylla Rhiadra
    I'm sure that your imaginary account is a pretty accurate portrait. The only times I've seen tangible actions from Governance was when he was placing objects, signs, and flags around one of my parcels, on abandoned land that, for some reason, they hadn't reset perms on. Governance did remove those . . . eventually. Or, alternately, they just finally got around to fixing the perms on the land, and my AR was incidental.
  21. Scylla Rhiadra
    The original griefer's account is still around. In fact, this is just about the only text on his profile now: "Possible griefer who dumped a LOAD of sh*t at Flagg" Flagg is the region that used to be the site of my group's main land holdings until I sold it two years ago. It's the place that he griefed with self-replicating objects. So, not only unbanned, but even happy to boast about the fact. Yes, I do reference the previous ARs, exactly because I want to make clear that there is a pattern here. I haven't filed a ticket. Possibly I should. Yes, object entry is blocked. I think the reason that doesn't matter is that he doesn't try to shift the entire object onto my parcel: he leaves about 1/5th of it on SLRR land. In other words, it's not really "entering" my parcel: it's just intruding upon it, in the same way that a neighbour's building or a fence might sometimes cross a parcel boundary a bit. Except in this case, the "bit" is most of it, and it's huge. The last time he did this, I had a difficult time returning it (I eventually worked it out using land tools) because he kept the root prim on public land. I assume it's probably too late to do this now, as I've returned the object, but it might be a thought to consider next time. (And there is bound to be a "next time.") I'm all ears!
  22. Scylla Rhiadra
    Oh, I don't think there's any question that I'm being targeted because of my politics. He's not, I'd imagine, griefing random residences or parcels: I'm sure he's choosing ones belonging to people whose politics he dislikes. The thing is, of course, that he's not actually achieving anything. He's not "making an argument" or "proving" me "wrong," or even making much of a statement. HE drew my attention to the griefing, quiet deliberately, by sending along his alt, IMing me, and hanging out to watch. Had he not done that, his object -- which had a giant American flag on it, btw, because "patriotism" I guess -- probably would still be there, in view of anyone on the SLRR and neighbouring parcels. He wanted me to see it -- and was impatient that I hadn't yet. My politics is why he's coming after me, without question, but his motivation is the pleasure he gets from the harassment.
  23. Scylla Rhiadra
    Thanks Quiet, that's lovely and appreciated. ❤️ Truthfully, this guy is an annoyance more than anything else. While he has griefed the parcel when I was away, and so wasn't around to fix it for a few days, I know people who have undergone much worse. I just don't understand why he's permitted to just keep on doing it, without any apparent fear of retribution. ETA: And as to the why . . . I don't get that either. But it was a whole culture some time ago, and there are still some remnants of it. People here will remember groups like Woodbury U, the Patriotic N******, and The Wrong Hands. On the one hand, they pretended they were being very edgy and subversive, and undercutting the Establishment "normies." On the other, they just thought it was a gas. Like this guy sending in an alt to watch. He may kid himself that he was striking a righteous blow against wicked and vile Lefties, but mostly, this is his idea of having a good time. Which says rather a lot about him, I think.
  24. Scylla Rhiadra
    I'm in, but I don't want "power." I just want to nuke one particular account, and then, like the emperor Diocletian, retire to grow cabbages quietly on my own parcel. ETA: Extracted from the email I've received from LL. "We know that you are eager to continue to enjoy your time in Second Life, but that you might also be curious about what will happen as a result of this report. Rest assured that our skilled team of Governance Lindens will give it a complete and thorough review." /me snorts derisively
  25. Scylla Rhiadra
    What I don't get is . . . . . . this guy has like one visible group. It's one of those stupid Libertarian Techno-anarchist / Hactivist groups that were so big like 12 years ago or so. Very Woodbury U, with a right wing flavour. The guy griefs me regularly -- I'm sure I'm a favourite target, but I'd lay money that I'm not the only one. And I'd also bet he's been doing it for the better part of his 13 years in SL. So, like, for real: what exactly do you have to do to get permabanned for griefing? Cuz apparently targeting the same person over and over again ain't sufficient. Or is this guy a "special case" with some kind of immunity for some reason? ETA: Forgot to mention, he came by on an alt to watch the fun. I was on my sky platform, and got an IM from a three month old avatar with an unpronounceable name on the ground level of the parcel, wishing me a "Happy SL." I greeted him back . . . and noticed after a couple of minutes that he was still hanging around down below, which made me immediately suspicious. So I opened my Land dialog to check "Objects," and . . . there it was. He sped off when I TPed down. What's weird is that he didn't use the alt to do the griefing. He used his 13-year old account. The object belonged to the oldster, not the new account. It's like he feels he's got some kind of protection or immunity.
×
×
  • Create New...