InnerCity Elf

Of course, it could be, but in case you want to think less about it - it could also just be that there are more people like me who read the forum on their phone, are a bit clumsy, forgot their glasses,... and accidentally land on someone's profile, while they actually just wanted to click the latest comment in some thread from the thread list... I know it happened to me several times... 😊

I loved Snow Crash back then, but for sure, the first time I read the title in relation to Philip Rosedale/SL, my thoughts pretty much were, "right, sure, Hiro, the protagonist, is a programmer and sword fighte, of course it would be a favourite of anyone involved in computers, coding, and the like". I guess I may have to reread it, with the thought if SL and parallels simmering in the back of my mind, as it never really made that link unprompted. Being European, too, my knowledge of Burning Man is very second-hand. To me, it mostly says, "hippie festival, probably an interesting experience, but not one I'm too keen on", but I guess I can see potential similarities, for example, a kind of at least surface or somewhat degree/idea of egality and self-organization, or as a kind of social experiment that people engage in willingly, people living out some dream, ... and naked people, of course Really should reread Snow Crash (sold it ages ago, but my library probably has it), and see how my present self likes and interprets it, as a first-hand experience of Burning Man won't happen.

"Banlines" that are baked into buildings would seem to be a solution that many or most home owners should be happy with, and with negligible effects on "strangers" walking, flying, or whatever by. No idea if it's even remotely futurely feasible, but if there's BOM other stuff, maybe there could also be BOS (baked-on security) I've often wished, there was no need for keys in real life, and everyone could just leave their doors unlocked, it would be such an increase in quality of life, and so much time saved over a lifetime... But, well, people. 🤡 ETA: While I do mind people apart from the "approved ones" waltzing into my four walls, potentially harming me, taking off with my hard-earned stuff, or observing me, it doesn't bother me in SL. Usually, on the contrary I had my mainland ground level homes here set up in invitingly, as a (semi) public place, with a nice seating area, something to read, virtual coffee,... , and an About Land text that did tell them they're welcome, if they bothered reading. And a skybox for "private moments", i.e. changing clothes, sorting out inventory, AFKing, etc. Camming doesn't bother me either in SL (certainly does in RL, I know someone whose landlord had a camera in their flat...), if anyone wants to watch boring things like my avi go through clothes and outfits for some inventory cleanout, whatever.

makes me worry.

Took me bit of googling AND clicking various results to arrive at the most possible solution as the one Scylla kindly provided. Maybe I should've read on and hoped for that, but I take it as a TIL (today I learned... ;)) lesson. Acronyms generally not a pet peeve of mine, as you can learn interesting things while trying to figure out what's meant. Unless it's related to my actual work and people make up acronyms, insider acronyms, so to speak, without having a glossary or something. Means often a lot of additional time for puzzling it out or having to ask. And in the worst case, there's an actual non-insider acronym that would also make perfect sense in the given context, so you get it wrong without really having the chance of knowing... <-- a peeve

A critical point. Both that we, usually, do change, in some regards, and aren't the same person that used the forum ten or five or even one year ago, and as well that we don't change (much) in other regards, while the forum environment, most of all the users, also do/don't change. Other old users like us change/don't change in the same way we do, new users add themselves to the mix, it's all constantly in flux. Also applies to "in-world SL", to SL roleplay, and real life at large, I guess. Our feelings about the forum probably depend a lot on our ability to adapt and the effort we put in to get out of it what we're looking for at any time.

Trying to, but can't get to a result. Such a thread (or rather section, as indeed, intendes for newbies, it should be easily visible as its own top category) would be good traffic? It's an interesting point in regards to this thread's topic, as that definitely is an objective change in the forum, if a formerly well findable thread gets buried where nobody will look for it. That thread would look very OT to me in Events. Of course, I don't know how big an effect such a thread/section has, but it can't have been a good change in regards to newbie retention in any case, and most forums seem to have such a category, or at least most if not all of the forums I visit.

Probably. I suspect, there'd need to be a banner with that reminder that you actively need to click away any time you visit the forum, or even per thread... Then again, even then, the people who really make the posts that make you wonder the most, probably would wholeheartedly click "yes, I'm only here to discuss, ask for or give advice, related to SL, ... (or whatever such an official banner would say), in an amicable , or at least polite, way, and not just to put others down, so they'll feel more miserable than do I, or to..."; and of course, many people would only read it once, perhaps, and just quickly click it away, and enter perhaps in an even worse mood, as they already were forced to an unnecessary click more... 😅 PS: I just questioned my motive today, and I fear it's about 99% procrastination with a 1% sprinkle of wassup in the forums _______ I can't find it now, but I saw a post where someone mentioned that there's no "welcome/self-intro" thread. Such a thread might indeed help new forum users, as (hopefully) only people who'd genuinely want to take the time to drop by and just say hi, or leave a helpful tip or two if the OP asked for it, especially if they feel too shy to just jump into ongoing threads, would go there. It also might help them to connect to other newbies. On a forum that I went to a lot, I had kind of a policy for myself that I'd first respond to two or three of the newbie threads that had zero or very few replies, yet, before moving on to the (juicy) threads of my interest. Of course, many of those threads were essentially just a long list of "hi, welcome", and "hi, I'm new too", but it probably does help new people if their first interactions are positive, and that they even get interaction. Even if maybe their first post in a "real thread" doesn't go so well, from that welcome/intro section, they already know that there are both other newbies just like them, and also some oldbies who aren't so scary 👻

Now, I have zero idea who else this ebil 🐘 may be, nor will I be on the lookout for clues, but even without that "background knowledge", was amused. Maybe I'm easily amused, but I see that, as well as a sense of humour, as an advantage, on forums, ss well as in general life. And this "humorous interjection", apart from making me lol, thank you, also made me think that "forum attendance" and the general "feel" of a forum has, including the feeling of "welcomeness", among many other things, also a lot to do with a sense of humour, or the lack thereof, on all sides, the forum at large, the moderation, the regular populace, and the newbies peeking in and staying, or not. When humorous posts, no matter how lighthearted and personally inoffensive they are (of course, there are people who didn't get dealt a generous dose of humour, and would take offense, either because they have/are one or more or all of those things or more, or because they are saints and would never ever even dream of it, and are also infallible in every other department, in any of their lives), are regularly getting reported for OT, if the reporting-happy people can't find another reason at all, are actually taken off and being discouraged by the moderation, and regulars either don't dare posting such things anymore and/or leave, forums become a somber and drab place to only go to if you need some factual info, and only return to, when you need some factual info. Such posts existing, or even sometimes spotting a humorous post by moderation itself, usually make me think that a forum is generally "healthy" and welcoming, and that there are regular or at least returning people, giving it a bit of a community or homely vibe. Forums where that doesn't exist at all, make me think they aren't worthwhile, other than following a link for info that you were googling for. It never ceases to amaze me how little humour many people display, and how worked up some can get while forum fighting over usually, in the bigger picture, irrelevant things with "irrrelevant" people (not really, if course , all people are relevant, but you know what I mean), including getting personally insulting, name-calling, and probably grinding their real or unreal teeth behind their computer. And can't even see it and laugh about themselves, and forget and forgive, others involved and themselves, later in hindsight when revisiting a thread or seeing an "adversary" again in another thread, and carry their grudges on forever. A forum can suffer a certain amount of such people well enough, but too many of them can make it too tiring for oldbies, and too unwelcoming for newbies.

I agree, and would add that, from my experience over the years... decades 😭😅..., that this seems to apply to pretty much any forum I've ever visited over time. Everything and everyone has phases, goes around circles, one generation or batch of people leaves or reduces in number, a new batch enters... and things, at the same time, change and stay the same.

Very wise (although, again, depending on how different people use SL, not doable; someone who wants to turn an SL relationship into a RL one, won't get around at least some of that ;)). Together with several mentions of "outed", "figured out", etc. (alts), this makes me wonder if outing someone's alt might in itself constitute (potential) (unpurposeful) "doxxing"? A person might not have "published" (for example in their SL profile or a flickr or blog or whatever they might keep for their alts) critical RL info on one alt, but maybe on another, and might only want specific people to have access to that RL info, which would be publicly accessible to others if someone outs their alt. Also, am I alone in thinking that "alt" somehow sounds already suspicious, while "alternate account" sounds perfectly respectable? 😂

I don't know but generally, people who keep switching between alts on a forum do themselves a disservice more than they'd harm others in any meaningful way, no? Most people who regularly read and or post on a forum, apart from those who solely are looking for facts, info, are looking for some kind of community, exchange of opinions, discussion, belonging, (forum) friends, rapport, entertainment through communication and such, and that's only possible if they, and most others "show up as the same poster" repeatedly, some kind of regularly. I'm not really a very regular forum poster, as my forum posting as well as my in-world activity are rather on/off, due to "real life", so I might post frequently over a few weeks, and then disappear again for months, etc. But I still "know" many forumites well enough to know, "ah, A posted, gonna read that, always interesting info", I know to not take B and C too literally, as they often make sarcastic remarks, that I can rely on L posting cute pics, that I tend to "like" posts of D, E, and F the most, because I usually agree with them, and it's always cosy to see your bias confirmed ;), or, on the contrary, usually do not agree with them but they tend to give me good food for thought, that I don't really like the attitude of G and H, and so on. It doesn't matter much if D actually also posts as Y sometimes, or if M is also W, and posts on whichever of those is their current "main" in-world. I don't think that I'm that kind of special ( we're all special, of course, but you know what I mean ), so, if it's that way for me, it probably is for many others, too. And this only works because many or probably most people expect and use forums in a similar way. Even if some dont, it seems to work well enough for those who do, and those who don't, kind of "not reap the fruits of what they're sowing" and deny themselves the deeper connection that happens between people who always or mostly are there as the same account. What I wanted to say with that is perhaps, "ah, let them, it's their loss" (or everyone's win, if they make the effort to log in and out to entertain us with a bit of humour ;)). An exception to my laissez-faire POV there is when it gets really personal. If someone is on direct messaging terms with me with their account A, then, yes, I'd want them to tell me right away "hey, I'm A", when they semd me a dm as B, because they are in a "B is my main this season, because I'm a lycan in an awesome new roleplay, and A doesn't have the inventory for that" phase or have rediscovered their love for an alt's username, or something. It would be totally fine to not tell me, though, as long as they take the trouble to switch accounts when they are sending me a direct message. _ I haven't ever "been moderated" here, and the only times I've been elsewhere, was when either using words that were on the forum's trigger list, because AI isn't that good with context, and twice been reported by someone who didn't like me, for an off-topic post in threads whose creators were forzm friends, and totally fine with OT (from anyone, no nepotism involved), and like 3/4 of the thread was OT anyway. So that was somewhat silly, and one might call it (too) heavy-handed, but, yes, my post was OT, and the forum rules said, no OT, so I can't blame the moderation for accepting and acting on someone's complaint about my post being OT. The moderators often won't know everyone involved well enough, or it would take too much time to thoroughly read through a whole thread, and they also often don't have the background knowledge to read between the lines and know the "undercurrents", and such, they often need to make quick decisions, and they can't really ignore the rules (especially if someone points at them), or bend them too much. Quibbles between forum posters - even if sometimes, at that point in time, the participants may think so - typically aren't earth-shattering enough to spend too much time and resources on for anyone else.

That was interesting to read, and I had to think for a while. I can see why some people are against it on principle, but also can think of and saw some good arguments in favour of forum alts, for example "business/private" account, or not using one's main on the forum for fear or experience of getting harassed. My current answer would be that I don't care or mind or look for it (and probably wouldn't notice, anyway, unless someone was being very obvious or intentionally "marking" their alts), as long as the alt isn't used in a manipulative way. It's a bit of a special case, on the whole, unlike your typical forum, as it's the *SL* forum, and while it's called "Second Life", and not "Multiple Lives", it is officially allowed to have "multiple Second Lives", which makes me think it should also be fine to use several forum accounts if you want to, especially as your different SL accounts come with those automatically - again, if there's no malicious, deceptive, disingenuous agenda behind it, of course. Things like people logging in with account 2 to "support" their account 1 by arguing for them or liking their other accounts posts and such, well, bless their hearts, can't be easy to be them.

There's a Japanese .. hmm ... murder mystery comedy... series, "Anata no ban desu - your turn to kill", where one of the murderes (there's a "murder swap game" among the residents of a condo going on (and more, but that would be a spoiler),so there are lots of murders and murderers, but it's still something of a comedy, too) is an "elevator enthusiast", works or worked as an elevator maintenance guy, and he calls elevators by women names, "protects" the one in the condo from a guy with dirty work, making him only use the stairs, and one or two times, someone "walks in" on him caressing the elevator ... I don't like elevators in RL, and avoid them when reasonably possible, but I do like them in SL. I was on a roleplay sim years ago that had a building with a very nice functional elevator where I rented an apartment, and loved the "realism" of the elevator, despite all the clicking and time it took, but the place sadly doesn't exist anymore. Maybe in airport buildings? There sure are a lot of them in RL airports. I think there was one in a big freebie mall that I went to when I was new, but couldn't swear, it's been a while, and wouldn't know where or if it still exists, anyway, I fear.

Objectively/subjectively, respectively "being vulnerable" vs "feeling vulnerable" is a very interesting point, and RL experiences might actually make some people more vulnerable. If someone sees no way out than log off, while they don't actually want to log off, some might say they are objectively more vulnerable (to certain situations, because of their RL background), while others still wouldn't accept the "objectively". And chances are probably that it's more women, with RL experiences that would "make them" escape a situation in SL, but, of course, that can apply to men, too. One could also look at it like, when someone feels pushed to get out of an SL situation so much they have to tp out or log off, they have bad feelings that are there, maybe even feel sick to their stomach, develop a headache, actually physical reactions, they exist, are objective, even though there is no way for a threat or perceived threat to materialize in SL. The subjective/objective border seems a little fuzzy to me.

Most women seem to say they don't feel vulnerable in SL because in SL, they can't be bodily harmed, mute, tp out, log off. I think one could argue that "being pushed" to do that already means feeling or being vulnerable in a way. Then again, you coud argue that nobody can make you do that and you do it to yourself. I don't feel very vulnerable in SL, generally, but there have been situations I couldn't/didn't want to handle, where I just logged out. Situations I'm pretty certain that I wouldn't have been in, had I been in a male, or cat, or whatever, non-human female avatar. Generally, I think, feeling vulnerable, or not, or even empowered, as a woman (fenale avatar) in SL is much a matter of personality. I don't doubt that many women don't feel vulnerable, but I also think that some do, even if there's no way to be bodily harmed. Love's comment made me think in a different direction, though. There is always the possibility that a hacker might get too many RL data for you to be comfy with, and that someone is trying "social hacking", maybe over time, so you might fall prey to it, even if you're not the type who'd give away too much RL info soon(ish), and the maybe subconscious "threat" that someone from SL might actually become able to indeed bodily harm you, or even just "appear in your RL", might cause a feeling of vulnerability. Just some thoughts. Strictly on-topic, I'd also tend to saying that it's likely a sort of projection (but maybe not completely unfounded, see above). ETA another thought that popped up when closing the thread and seeing the title again, I love to around in my cat avatar sometimes, and I'd say, I feel freer, more unbothered in the cat avatar than one of my female avatars, so, yes, maybe I feel more vulnerable in my female avatar, too. It's relatable, for me, at the least. What that does say about me, well, maybe just that I sometimes want to escape stupid IMs that waste precious time, or maybe that I do feel vulnerable, not sure.

I also went through an "identity crisis" from pre-mesh to post-mesh because I had gotten used to my face so much and I couldn't recreate it despite trying for a while. I was actually more thrilled when we got pretty hands than later about the heads. Clothes isn't much of an issue, I have a few shops that I'll visit when I feel I need something new, occasionally, I'll visit a shop I read about here on the forum, and I'll buy and wear whatever feels right at the time. I still have old outfits saved and occasionally wear them, old face, flexi, and everything, I used to be very fussy with my roleplaying looks, and some of them hold up well enough to still use them in my eyes. Not too long ago, someone actually IMed and complimented me on my (old) avatar (with my old system head with most favouritest skin ever, old outfit, not a single mesh thing) that I had just spontaneously put on to check out the hub of a newish roleplaying sim, hadn't planned on playing with that avatar, just to take a look at rules and such. That was quite a surprise. I wouldn't be seen dead walking around barefoot without mesh feet these days, hough, like I did back then. Hideous things, those old feet 😅

And we both now have a friend of a friend too! Or even lots of friends of a friend! 🙂

My definition of "real" makes me say no. The thread and the pic that Scylla posted make me think we'll see many more "Real" Life pictures in the RL profile tab now and soon, where before none or SL pics have been. This might also impact the "Relationships" category soonish and inspire lively discussions. YouTube, or my browser, not sure, lately bombards me with ads for a "Face Beautifying" app (interestingly, I'm often finding the "before" more attractive than the "after", but maybe that's just due to bad handling of the app by the user), and I also had a video suggestion that I actually watched, to see what's possible these days, where an "average-looking woman of a certain age" showed her actual self and demonstrated the app she's using to beautify her videos, showing different effects and degrees that she constantly uses, live. It was... eye-opening, and henceforth, I'll just assume that nothing ever is "real" until proven otherwise, like meet the person in the flesh. Amd then, I'll assume they had intensive beauty surgery, corrective surgery, or whatever it's called if it's not to fix an accident. And, of course, you could argue endlessly about whether "fixing" a nose that isn't acceptable to someone according to their current beauty standards, makes them less or more real, or whatever. Sonetimes, it does make you wonder whether we're heading into a world wide world of hikikimori, because it just will be too disappointing to step outside and into reality. Maybe a new kind of "includes artificially enhanced pics and footage" disclaimers should become the norm, like those "includes paid advertisements" ones, so there won't be generations growing up with the impression that everyone anywhere else than they live, is hyper beautiful. However, as long as it's clear that it's not real, it sure could be a lot of fun if applicable "live" and without lag in-world; roleplay with hyper realistic looking avatars, including fantasy creatures and animals could be awesome. Maybe rather frightening, too, though, depending...

(I actually had to look that up. Thanks!, learned several new potential meanings other than Quantum Field Theory, which I guessed it maybe didn't mean here.) QED 😂

It's a minefield indeed, but not just for men. As a woman, you need to think really hard about complimenting a man, because so many of them will take it as you wanting more than just to make their day nicer for a second, a friendly chat, or, at the most, friendship, and their misplaced pride won't allow them to shake it off with a laugh, once they realise it's not going to get further and might get them a really nice friend who isn't stingy with compliments and would brighten their days often. Complimenting women as a woman, without any agenda beyond honestly liking whatever you compliment them on, on the other hand, often is a rewarding thing. Which again, seems a bit sad, because often you get the impression that it must be a rare thing for women to get compliments from women. Life is complicated. Or humans make it so.

... 🤔 If/once SL, and tech in general, will evolve as far as having affordable realistic scent experience ... "You're always such a breath of fresh air, darling" to the person with FAR too much perfume/aftershave on themself, on your way to open your RL window WIDE.

(Not sure where to post this, please feel free to move it if there's a better category.) For accounts like an SL one, having an option that lets you choose if you want your account to be deleted, if you haven't logged in within a specified amount of time, would be good. (just as an option, not mandatory, people who wouldn't like "having to log in every x months" wouldn't need to activate it) That is, as far as possible, a little something has to remain, because account names are unique, but logs, notecards, inventory "stuff", outfits, etc., would get automatically deleted, and the profile could show something like "account deleted, as wished by the user, after they did not log in for over a year". That should include some automated reminder messages "hi, you have this option active, make sure to log in before...", and maybe, if wanted, specifying one additional email this would be sent to, not just to your account's email. Different options for the timeframe for different user cases, like 3, 6, 12 months, might also be nice. I don't know how difficult or not all this is to implement, and how much longer the terms of service document would need to be 😵‍💫, but while a "modular option" with different things to choose, from number of months to what should/shouldn't be deleted, would be nice to have, even a very basic option would be better than no option. 🙂 A major mail provider that I use provides a similar option since a while, which I have active and appreciate, and would also use if SL offered it.

"Neat, you're wearing your 2nd best outfit because it's 2nd life, right? That's genius, I only do that on weekdays in 1st life, to not get coffee and stuff on my Sunday clothes." Theoretical backhanded compliment to make someone ponder if they should dress a little bit better. Just for the sake of the thread, though, I'd never do that, SL or RL. Advice or opinion regarding someone's outfit only if it's a not backhanded but honest compliment or if I was explicitly asked, in which case, polite but honest, not backhanded. Jokingly, maybe, but only if I know the person well enough to know they'll understand and take it in the right spirit. People can be quite insecure about even the weirdest things, things you can't imagine why they would be, and it can inadvertently hurt a lot, depending, so I'm careful. It's a fun intellectual game, though, the thread : )

I commented the post about no kindle version available with a laugh, because it sounded so funny that you can't get such of all the books on Kindle, but checked on my Android phone, and, yes, can buy. I'm curious but not sure yet, though, the kindle version is €10 cheaper than paperback, but €20 is still a proud price if it's more like a collection of blog writings than an academic work or Shakespearean play, compared to what other books I could get for that price. I'll follow the thread and ponder it a while longer. For the records, I also hope that Philip won't "come around" (unless literally, I hope "they" all come around and hang out incognito often enough to still have valid up-to-date perceptions), or let's say, that he won't come around too much, it doesn't have to be all or nothing, even though it's definitely difficult to impossible to please too many different people and expectations.