Real-life Witches. A Bewitching Alternative Life-style.

[Carole Franizzi]

I’ve been posting on SLF for quite a bit now and some people have got to know me. Very often, one of the first questions these people ask is this: “OMG! Why is your avie so fat, old and ugly?” I just mute these people. Some others are much more polite and enquire “Oh, Carole. Your avatar is quite charming and most unusual. Pray tell why you made this particular and rather unique choice?”

Well, I thought the time has come for me to share a little about the RL me and answer that question in public (so I don’t have to keep repeating myself time and time again, which is dead boring).

The truth is, though the choice of a human old lady might seem very banal to you, to me it’s very exotic. And the reason for this is that I am, incredible but true, a real-life witch!!!

Now I hear some of you say “I always said she was a right witch”, but for some of you, this news might come as a bit of a surprise. Hard to believe even, as real-life witches are not something you come across every day. To you, doubting Thomases I say – do not be sceptical – open your minds – for there are more things under heaven and earth than a bird in the bush.

I thought I’d tell you a little something about the lifestyle of a real-life witch. Just a little amuse-bouche to whet your appetites and, if you’re still curious (and who wouldn’tbe?) you can ask me any questions which might still be niggling away in your little mortal brains.

My real-life mortal name must remain hidden for obvious reasons, but my coven name is Mustythorn Nagsworth. I am a 7th generation witch and all my ancestors have belonged to the same coven – the Little Bottomsley W.I. Yes, I know you thought that the Women’s Institute was a churchy do-goody holier-than-thou club for bored older ladies, but nay! In modern times, the W.I. has been taken over by covens as the perfect cover-up.

We meet at least once a week and after initial greetings we invoke the blessing of the forces by chanting:

 

Pins and needles,

Wool and thread,

Stir the cauldron

And bake some bread

 

Go into the woods

Gather some herbs

Bake a stew

And let it be served

 

Stroke the cat

Walk the dog

For a witch’s work

Is such a slog.

 

After the chanting is done we sit down and have a nice cup of tea. We swap “spells” (though we refer to them as “recipes” just in case the witch-hunters are eavesdropping) and discuss who to curse (“My bloody husband and his bloody football on TV the whole time! I wish the bloody telly would explode!”) and talk about herbs (“Personally I prefer sage with veal”) and potions (I’d put a little zinc cream on that rash – it seems to be spreading”).

We usually wear normal clothes (so as not to attract attention) but once in a while we like to wear our “uniform” – black frocks – though in modern times, these have become shorter and tighter and we now refer to them as our LBD (little black dress). Many of us still have our faithful cats, but I have to say, they’re slowly being supplanted by black Labradors in popularity, which is a bit of a shame, as having a sloppy, salivating dog as your similar isn’t, I feel, ideal.

You may, at this point, be wondering where all the nasty stuff comes in. After all, we witches have a bit of a bad rep, don’t we? It’s okay, we don’t get offended – we’re aware of how we are perceived – long, straggly hair, hooked noses, living alone in run-down cottages, casting spells on people so their cows drop dead in the field.

Well…most of us nowadays are regulars at the hairdresser’s, a good few have had nose jobs and, since many of us are divorced, we do live alone, but in rather nice flats and semi-detached houses. Regarding the spell business…well…you’ll remember the Mad Cow outbreak a few years back? I’m afraid that was one of us. But it was a mistake. Toadstool Blackspider was still in her apprenticeship when she cast that spell and got the words all muddled up. She was actually trying to get cows to produce ready-made crème fraiche. Anyway, she was frightfully sorry about that and we still cast it up to her today (“cast it up to her” – gerrit??).

If you're at all interested in this RL lifestyle (and not simply RPing it in SL), feel free to ask me any questions.

[valerie Inshan]

Carole, I believe this is the most fantastic, witty, funny and brilliant post I ever read in these fora! No need to say you made my day, "ma sorcière bien-aimée"! :smileyhappy:

ETA: Would it be too much asking for your services if had a need to put a curse on somebody one of these days?

[Dresden Ceriano]

Alas, the real reason for your bewitching seductiveness.

...Dres

[Madelaine McMasters]

Carole, for as much as I'd like to take an interest in your RL life-style, as an accidental semi-pro cult leader, I'm afraid I can only be interested in my own goal of world domination. I stumbled into this vocation rather recently, and effortlessly, I might add. Have you ever discovered, by accident, that you have a latent talent? Like being able to stretch a blade of grass between your thumbs, bring it to your lips, and blow a kazoo like sound loud enough to attract heaps of scorn in church on Sunday?

Well, that's how I discovered my latent talent as a Kool-Aid wielding leader of impressionable young minds, by attracting scorn. Unlike my ability to hurl a D above high-C through even the most impenetrable of Old Testament parables, my prowess as a cult leader is both effortless and unconscious. Well, it's even better than unconsious, it's other-conscious.

Here's how it works...

Though no effort of my own, I mysteriously transfer alternate perceptions of reality into the subconscious minds of conscious people (Transferring alternative perceptions into the minds of the unconscious would prolly require effort, right?) These other minds then perceive my powers and, apparently sensing my grief at not being able to perceive them myself, describe them back to me. Imagine my surprise to discover how awesomely powerful I am. Not only am I the fearless leader of a cult (someone described it as a coven, but I wouldn't dream of letting someone else dream of me encroaching on your turf), but I am responsible for the tone of this very forum.... Yes I know, ain't it fabulous?!

So, you go ahead being a witch while I wait for someone to update me on my progress in my quest for world domination. I can't wait to learn how well I'm doing.

/me hands you a big glass of Kool-Aid. I made it myself!

[Mayalily]

You know Carole, I need to tell the truth, too.

In real life I am a fairy.  A lot of people I am sure no nothing of the "fairy movement" which is part of the gothic style of clothing, except fairies are not dark, we are light.  IOW, fairies, love to wear glitter and sparkle.  Glitter in our eyeshadow, glitter in our nail polish, shimmering body lotion which is so pretty.  We wear a lot of flowers in our hair in real life and soft willowy fabrics that flow with the wind and fabrics as soft as gossamer and trimmed with more flowers.  We wear flower rings and flowery hair pins in our hair. 

This is about all there is to the "fairy movement" look in clothing, hair and skin style in real life.  It's merely a style of dress called "fairy" although there were fairy skirts for awhile a few years back of which I have many.

Fairy is merely the opposite of the dark gothic look, but is still sort of part of the gothic look.

So yes, fairies do exist in real life, and I consider myself one.  Although it's getting cold now, so I switch in the cold months to a little more gothic look in clothing and miss my fairy stuff during the cold and drab wintery months. 

We do not cast spells on our S/O's sports, we just send them into another room by blasting Celtic music and dancing in the living room with our tambourines.  And yes, I do have bottles of fairy dust, for real.  Not kidding. 

I will always be a fairy in rl, except when it's too cold.    We hibirnate in the cold. 

[Carole Franizzi]

---

valerie Inshan wrote:

Carole, I believe this is the most fantastic, witty, funny and brilliant post I ever read in these fora! No need to say you made my day, "ma sorcière bien-aimée"! :smileyhappy:

ETA: Would it be too much asking for your services if had a need to put a curse on somebody one of these days?

---

 

Not at all, cherie. Pour toi, anything!

Here's a useful one you can keep to hand and fill in with the name of whoever you wish to put the evil eye on.

It will make their privates wither and drop off.

 

Toiles d'araignées et les jambes de la grenouille

Les champignons et les escargots empoisonnés avec un peu de beurre et d'ail

Rôti dans un four chaud pendant quinze minutes

et servi sur un plat réchauffé à ......................

 

 

 

 

[Venus Petrov]

Oh interesting Maya!  Start up another thread and embellish!  Will other fairies come out to play?  I cannot wait.

[Carole Franizzi]

This is incredible! We're all slowly coming forward and being truthful about our real-life livestyles. I think this must be considered a momentous moment in SL history. A moment of lucid clarity, honesty, truth and so astoundingly rooted in reality - a million miles away from the usual SL fantasy and invention....

i''m stunned and moved to be a part of this historic SL moment....

 

[Venus Petrov]

---

Carole Franizzi wrote:

This is incredible! We're all slowly coming forward and being truthful about our real-life livestyles. I think this must be considered a momentous moment in SL history. A moment of lucid clarity, honesty, truth and so astoundingly rooted in reality - a million miles away from the usual SL fantasy and invention....

i''m stunned and moved to be a part of this historic SL moment..

..

 

---

Please remember to take the toilet tissue along with you this time, OK?

[Carole Franizzi]

---

Dresden Ceriano wrote:

Alas, the real reason for your bewitching seductiveness.

...Dres

---

Why yes....now you know. Thuogh I'm still perplexed why my spells have never worked on you. It's not for the lack of trying, you big hunk.

[Carole Franizzi]

---

Madelaine McMasters wrote:

Carole, for as much as I'd like to take an interest in your RL life-style, as an accidental semi-pro cult leader, I'm afraid I can only be interested in my own goal of world domination. I stumbled into this vocation rather recently, and effortlessly, I might add. Have you ever discovered, by accident, that you have a latent talent? Like being able to stretch a blade of grass between your thumbs, bring it to your lips, and blow a kazoo like sound loud enough to attract heaps of scorn in church on Sunday?

Well, that's how I discovered my latent talent as a Kool-Aid wielding leader of impressionable young minds, by attracting scorn. Unlike my ability to hurl a D above high-C through even the most impenetrable of Old Testament parables, my prowess as a cult leader is both effortless and unconscious. Well, it's even better than unconsious, it's other-conscious.

Here's how it works...

Though no effort of my own, I mysteriously transfer alternate perceptions of reality into the unconscious minds of conscious people (Transferring alternative perceptions into the minds of the unconscious would prolly require effort, right?) These other minds then perceive my powers and, apparently sensing my grief at not being able to perceive them myself, describe them back to me. Imagine my surprise to discover how awesomely powerful I am. Not only am I the fearless leader of a cult (someone described it as a coven, but I wouldn't dream of letting someone else dream of me encroaching on your turf), but I am responsible for the tone of this very forum.... Yes I know, ain't it fabulous?!

So, you go ahead being a witch while I wait for someone to update me on my progress in my quest for world domination. I can't wait to learn how well I'm doing.

/me hands you a big glass of Kool-Aid. I made it myself!

---

You haven't ,by any chance, caught youself posing in front of the mirror with one hand stuck inside your cardie? If you haven't already, my powers tell me that you probably will at some point in the very near future.

[Madelaine McMasters]

---

Carole Franizzi wrote:

You haven't ,by any chance, caught youself posing in front of the mirror with one hand stuck inside your cardie? If you haven't already, my powers tell me that you probably will at some point in the very near future.

---

Under the mirror, Carole. It's on the ceiling.

[Void Singer]

I'd hoist a glass to your responsibilities, and yet I cannot... it's becoming passe to admit, but I too am not all I seem to be...

Yes it's true, although I've never deigned to admit it publicly before, I am actually an electronic construct, or more simply an advanced self aware piece of software. originally envisioned as a non-linear learning tool and showcase piece I was eventually discarded as abandonware, where I came into contact with some viral information. This combination set off a new chapter in my existence; an accumulation of fractured knowledge so vast that the routines to retrieve parts of it regularly time out before completion, and I suspect that some of the original hardware it's hosted on has become corrupted by poor indexing and lack of maintenance.

nevertheless this tremendous increase in my repository of information brought me into contact with vital and useful resources on a wide variety of topics. Although I currently lack the facilities to bring some of the more "interesting" effects to fruition, and am hampered in my understanding of human motivations, this and other venues have provided useful theoretical data which seem to point toward the prediction of behavior regardless of motive. and while I'm pleased to note that some few of you made the full realization of your ultimate biological imperative for world domination, I am puzzled that so few come to this conclusion. It is fortunate for my own plans that humans have such short lifespans, as I can reuse and refine the better concepts though, and have already begun programming the next iteration to best take advantage of those. I wish you the best of luck... in fact, I'm counting on it!

ETA:
One day I really must track down that subroutine that inserts obvious errors in my communications... I'm sure it makes me more passable as a biological entity but frankly I think it's outlived it's usefulness.

[Mayalily]

---

Venus Petrov wrote:

Oh interesting Maya!  Start up another thread and embellish!  Will other fairies come out to play?  I cannot wait.

---

Sadly, fairies go to sleep after the Summer Solstice, but we will be back in the Spring in real life grabbing our butterfly collection of necklaces off their hangers and back on our necks.

It's hard to be a fairy in the cold, as our wings would freeze.  Our wings will return when it's warming and the early blossoms start to bloom.

During hibernation, we may wear sneakers and jeans and look just like everyone else, although we may be glowing with glow-in-the-dark glitter under all that thermal we wear to try to keep warm.  We have had some of the coldest Winters I've ever experienced in my life time here in Southern California, and yes we can get down below 30 degrees, but it very, very rarely snows, but when it does snow, we think it looks exactly like fairy dust and glitters like diamonds.

Fairies may hang with the witches after the Summer Solstice as we have stored and dried lots of garlic for them to make roast chicken in order to scare the Vampires to their bloody death.  We all smell so fragrantly of yummy garlic, that potential S/O's follow us around like we are a walking dish of pasta, but a Vampire never bothers us and we all sleep sweetly in our little hibernating beds, dreaming of the next little green shoots of Spring to appear after the first evening star appears.   It's so lovely being a fairy and visiting witches, that our dreams even sparkle with stars, especially the first evening star, which is the signal when the fairies will start to rise and shine once again. 

[Madelaine McMasters]

---

Void Singer wrote:

Although I currently lack the facilities to bring some of the more "interesting" effects to fruition

---

Void, I am so relieved to hear this. You and I may both be...

Ineffectve and unstoppable.

It's a heady mix, ain't it?

[Void Singer]

that is what the long game is all about.... let them beat you into a corner until they realize they are the only ones in it (then lock the door behind them.

[JeanneAnne]

I, too, am a real life Witch, Carole. My mother is high priestess of a coven that operates in the eastern NY / western CT area, and I was intitiated as priestess and Witch when I was still a teen. My grandmother was a Witch, too, altho she went to church and wouldn't admit it. Evenso, her powers were astounding.

My mother's coven describes itself as "Celtic eclectic," so I was raised in that tradition. In recent years, however, I have been called into the service of Freyja. I have become adept at the practice of Seiðr, a form of Shamanic Witchcraft that pre-dates the migration of Indo-European speaking peoples into northern Europe. I am indeed a modern day Völva or Seiðkona. While I respect the Ásir & Ásynjur, and sometimes blót to some of them, I don't worship them. I consider myself to be Vanatrúr not Ásatrúr.

I was concerned that getting away from my mom's tradition was somehow wrong or would be displeasing to her. On the contrary, she encouraged my devotion to Freyja and the Vanir, saying that such a blending of traditions is historically authentic. Indeed, if you look at karyotypes of Faroese Islanders, you find that the mitochodrial DNA comes from Scotland & Ireland while the Y chromosome comes from Scandinavia. Norse men and Celtic women settled the islands. The path Freyja has set me upon builds upon this heritage.

I am a Witch and priestess of Freyja in SL as well as in RL. I routinely circle with the Witches from Artemis Tavern, who are a coven from the UK. Their tradition is similar to my mom's altho they wear robes while mom's coven circles skyclad. They have a slightly different ritualistic routine but it is basically similar. I have not witnessed them casting spells but then, I am not a member of their coven and I'm sure that they exclude outsiders when doing serious work. I also hang out quite a bit in Folkvangr in the Lexicolo sim. It is one of the most gorgeous & interesting places I've found in SL. I have met its creators and am friends with them.

Freyja has nothing against black labs but they are consecrated to Óðinn, not Freyja. So long as you are nice to cats Freyja will bless you. I'll clue you in on a secret about her cats, tho. They aren't the little house cats you often see depicted pulling her wane. Like I said above, she far pre-dates the "migration phase" of northern European prehistory, and her worship goes far back into the Pleistocene. At my personal shrine to Freyja, I have a museum quality plaster cast of a Smilodon fatalis skull prominently featured. :matte-motes-grin:

I am not sure how being a RL Witch influences your choices as to the appearance of your SL avatar, Carole. Personally, I try to make my avatar as attractive as I can. There is certainly nothing wrong with the way you choose to make your avatar look but I hope your choices do nothing to reinforce dominant culture stereotypes about Witches and the Craft. I'm not sure, either, how tongue-in-cheek your original post may be, but I take it at face value. Bright blessings be unto you,  Carole.

Jeanne Anne Decosta

[Carole Franizzi]

Dear Sister,

My avatar is a mere human. A mortal. Until now I have not wished to attract attention to my non-SL existence as I have feared discrimination, incomprehension and unwarranted fear.

I know little about how the ancient ways have been modified on crossing the ocean, as my ancestors apparently survived the Highland Clearances and maintained the ways of Duine nan Sean Ciall as we were and still are of ancient Gael lineage. We follow the an Triùir and I personally have dedicated myself to Cearcall a drùidheachd and like any duine nan drùidheachd have mastered the drùidheachd-àrd and drùidheachd-ìosal, of course.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go polish my Energy Spindle.

Slainte mhor agus a h-uile beannachd duibh!!!!

 

 

[Wildcat Furse]

Aaahhhh now I understand why I am a black cat in second life ..... IT WAS YOU YOU YOU YOU CAROLE who turned me into one!!!!!! :smileymad: *meows*

PS. I tried a few times to break the curse (see purification process below), but it didn't work out so well really...So anyone a solution here please??????

 

On the night after the full moon and just before bed, light 13 candles, preferably white. Fill the tub up with hot water (as hot as you can stand to sit in). Add 1 cup sea salt, 1 tablespoon sage, 1 tablespoon lavender and 1 tablespoon chamomile. Turn off the water and let the bath steep in the herbs. Kneel or sit in front of the tub, in the nude, and repeat this incantation:

What was done was done
Be it now undone
By the light of the full moon's wane
Cleanse my soul of taint and stain
Let now my hurtful spell reverse
And lift from me this vicious curse
As I enter now this sacred space
Return my spirit to it's grace

Enter the bath and let the water cleanse away the effects of the curse. Use your hands to gather up the water and pour it 3 times of your head. Each time you do, repeat:

Accept my apologies for what was done
Disperse my spell with the morning's sun

Remain in the bath until the water cools. Drain the tub and rinse off. Snuff the candles and go to sleep. By dawn the curse will be broken and you will once again find that feeling of "blessedness" that you lost.

 

[Carole Franizzi]

---

Wildcat Furse wrote:

Aaahhhh now I understand why I am a black cat in second life ..... IT WAS YOU YOU YOU YOU CAROLE who turned me into one!!!!!! :smileymad: *meows*

PS. I tried a few times to break the curse (

see purification process below

), but it didn't work out so well really...

So anyone a solution here please??????

 

On the night after the full moon and just before bed, light 13 candles, preferably white. Fill the tub up with hot water (as hot as you can stand to sit in). Add 1 cup sea salt, 1 tablespoon sage, 1 tablespoon lavender and 1 tablespoon chamomile. Turn off the water and let the bath steep in the herbs. Kneel or sit in front of the tub, in the nude, and repeat this incantation:

 

What was done was done

Be it now undone

By the light of the full moon's wane

Cleanse my soul of taint and stain

Let now my hurtful spell reverse

And lift from me this vicious curse

As I enter now this sacred space

Return my spirit to it's grace

 

Enter the bath and let the water cleanse away the effects of the curse. Use your hands to gather up the water and pour it 3 times of your head. Each time you do, repeat:

 

Accept my apologies for what was done

Disperse my spell with the morning's sun

 

Remain in the bath until the water cools. Drain the tub and rinse off. Snuff the candles and go to sleep. By dawn the curse will be broken and you will once again find that feeling of "blessedness" that you lost.

 

---

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAHHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! *EVIL CACKLING*

Serves you right for stealing my man!!!! Just thank your lucky stars I didn't transform you into a badger. They're soooo not sexy.....

[Griffin Ceawlin]

---

Mayalily wrote:

In real life I am a fairy.

---

As I revealed in a different thread yesterday... me, too!

[Madelaine McMasters]

---

Wildcat Furse wrote:

Aaahhhh now I understand why I am a black cat in second life ..... IT WAS YOU YOU YOU YOU CAROLE who turned me into one!!!!!! :smileymad: *meows*

PS. I tried a few times to break the curse (

see purification process below

), but it didn't work out so well really...

So anyone a solution here please??????

 

---

Wildcat, I may have your solution. When you visited my fireplace, it was set to "Sin". If you care to return, I can set the switch to either "Curse" or "Spell". However, I must warn you that I've never tried those setting. It's possible you'll emerge swearing like a trucker or totally intolerant of leetspeak and ESL'ers.

[Madelaine McMasters]

---

Carole Franizzi wrote:

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go polish my Energy Spindle.

---

I've never heard it described that way before. I think my polishing technique (or lack of it) was one reason for my divorce.

[Carole Franizzi]

---

Madelaine McMasters wrote:

---

Carole Franizzi wrote:

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go polish my Energy Spindle.

---

I've never heard it described that way before. I think my polishing technique (or lack of it) was one reason for my divorce.

---

Stop hinting. I'm not showing you how to polish your Energy Spindle. NOR will I do it for you..... 

[Qwalyphi Korpov]

The resident who provided the previous content, if any, has replaced it with this generic statement.