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Real-life Witches. A Bewitching Alternative Life-style.

Carole Franizzi

By Carole Franizzi,
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Madelaine McMasters

Madelaine McMasters

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Carole Franizzi wrote:

Madelaine McMasters wrote:

Carole Franizzi wrote:

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go polish my Energy Spindle.

I've never heard it described that way before. I think my polishing technique (or lack of it) was one reason for my divorce.

Stop hinting. I'm not showing you how to polish your Energy Spindle. NOR will I do it for you..... 

Oh, I was on the wrong spindle (for ten years actually).

/me breathlessly corrects her mistake.

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Carole Franizzi

Carole Franizzi

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Madelaine McMasters wrote:

Carole Franizzi wrote:

Madelaine McMasters wrote:

Carole Franizzi wrote:

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go polish my Energy Spindle.

I've never heard it described that way before. I think my polishing technique (or lack of it) was one reason for my divorce.

Stop hinting. I'm not showing you how to polish your Energy Spindle. NOR will I do it for you..... 

Oh, I was on the wrong spindle (for ten years actually).

/me breathlessly corrects her mistake.

Wish I didn't have these damn telepathic powers. I can see you using your spindle... Eeeew!

*pokes at eyes*

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Carole Franizzi

Carole Franizzi

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Void Singer wrote:

I'd hoist a glass to your responsibilities, and yet I cannot...
it's becoming passe to admit, but I too am not all I seem to be...

Yes it's true, although I've never deigned to admit it publicly before, I am actually an electronic construct, or more simply an advanced self aware piece of software. originally envisioned as a non-linear learning tool and showcase piece I was eventually discarded as abandonware, where I came into contact with some viral information. This combination set off a new chapter in my existence; an accumulation of fractured knowledge so vast that the routines to retrieve parts of it regularly time out before completion, and I suspect that some of the original hardware it's hosted on has become corrupted by poor indexing and lack of maintenance.

nevertheless this tremendous increase in my repository of information brought me into contact with vital and useful resources on a wide variety of topics. Although I currently lack the facilities to bring some of the more "interesting" effects to fruition, and am hampered in my understanding of human motivations, this and other venues have provided useful theoretical data which seem to point toward the prediction of behavior regardless of motive. and while I'm pleased to note that some few of you made the full realization of your ultimate biological imperative for world domination, I am puzzled that so few come to this conclusion. It is fortunate for my own plans that humans have such short lifespans, as I can reuse and refine the better concepts though, and have already begun programming the next iteration to best take advantage of those. I wish you the best of luck... in fact, I'm counting on it!

ETA:

One day I really must track down that subroutine that inserts obvious errors in my communications... I'm sure it makes me more passable as a biological entity but frankly I think it's outlived it's usefulness.

There will come the day, when it will bring gasps of awe and surprise when somebody posts in these forums that in RL they are just a mother of two and part-time secretary.

Regarding your outting...would you be awfully offended if I told you that I had a suspicion or two,,,,?

 

 

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Celestiall Nightfire

Celestiall Nightfire

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I just read through this whole thread....and wow...some of you folks are scary!  *shivers* 

Me, I'm just an ordinary human.  I would say I'm simple county folk, but another forumite told me, that if I have to ask what "simple county folk" means, then I can't be one.   : ( 

Regardless, my IP address does place me smack dap in the middle of a farmer's field...yeah...it's a corn field.  Not one of those progressive soybean fields that the hipster farmer's have. 

I don't have any supernatural powers or anything.  Well, I do have my looks....oh...and my charisma.  Better mention my fabulous body...and shucks...I forgot about my voice...which is radio quality...and ever so excellent.  Hmm, should I add my brains to the list?  I surely don't want to appear vain...

*Note:  My "voice" means speaking...NOT singing* 

 

ETA:  I just ready *shiver* witch Carole's post above.  So, I'd better tell this...I'm the mother of two...and only work part-time.

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Ima Rang

Ima Rang

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Void Singer wrote:

being software, you'd think I couldn't be offended but i have routines for that... but no, not terribly... I imagine your suspicions won't be the worst I've heard

 

The life of a POS sounds so lonely...Can I get you a plugin..an app...some new hardware?  

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Carole Franizzi

Carole Franizzi

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Celestiall Nightfire wrote:

I just read through this whole thread....and wow...some of you folks are scary!  *shivers* 

Me, I'm just an ordinary human.  I would say I'm simple county folk, but another forumite told me, that if I have to
ask
what "simple county folk" means, then I can't be one.   : ( 

Regardless, my IP address does place me smack dap in the middle of a farmer's field...yeah...it's a
corn
field.  Not one of those progressive soybean fields that the hipster farmer's have. 

I don't have any supernatural powers or anything.  Well, I do have my looks....oh...and my charisma.  Better mention my fabulous body...and shucks...I forgot about my voice...which is radio quality...and ever so excellent.  Hmm, should I add my brains to the list?  I surely don't want to appear vain...

*Note:  My "voice" means speaking...NOT singing* 

 

ETA:  I just ready *shiver* witch Carole's post above.  So, I'd better tell this...I'm the mother of two...and only work part-time.

Yes....I saw you in the bottom of my tea-cup and in the stones....I threw them and there you were...you were in the flickering flames of my hearth....so, so, incredibly ordinary....

Good, God, It must suck to be so normal.

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Carole Franizzi

Carole Franizzi

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Oh Lord! People are outting themselves all over the place. Just received this in my blog e-mail with a request to add it to my thread. Must be shy as the author signs himself "Anonymous SL and RL Troll". Whoever knew trolls existed in real-life....?

 

"I am so glad that you started this "Real Life" Confessions thread, Carole, as I feel that I have been hiding my light under a bushel for far too long, and I want to come out of the cupboard (which is where I normally sleep; trolls are agoraphobic) and expose myself to this forum. (Damn, there should have been a photo of me there but for some reason it's blank; perhaps because I took it in a mirror, and you know what they say about us magic folk and reflections)

I really want to do this because the name of my tribe has been taken in vain by the moderators and even those who might wish to be moderators but do not possess the required qualifications. It is one thing for homosexuals to claim sole rights over a word that once had wonderful and carefree overtones, rather than echoing The Ballad Of The Sad Young Men (Note: Insert superb Roberta Flack track here) and completely another for the electronic age to subvert the designation of a proud and ferocious warrior caste and apply it to people who seem to think that u is a word, bigotry is a replacement for argument, and ***bleep*** ***bleep*** ***bleep*** is a substitute for quondam dread-bolted skainsmate!

We trolls have a long and glorious history of righting wrongs and marching at the side of those who take longer to put their makeup on before going into battle. Just because most children seem to associate us with living under a bridge and attacking livestock (entirely justifiably, I must say - they were trespassing and had not paid the bridge toll, which merely reflects the levy they collect from those who would visit the golden land of Wales across the Severn) which reminds me, I must turn down the heat on the goat curry in the slow cooker, back in a minute . . .

. . . where was I? Ah yes, we have been given a bad name, literally, by those who are ignorant of the provenance of the word, and of our heritage in helping mankind and its brothers in darkness the vampires - whose illiteracy seems to suggest that they didn't make it to night school, perhaps because they were too busy ogling photos of Sarah Michelle Gellar in a suicidal emo fashion

So, to mark my admitting my native genetic predisposition, I would request that all fair-minded users of this forum, at least, should henceforth desist from using the appellation "troll" as a description of nuisances who post merely to annoy those who actually CAN spell and carry out a forum conversation by disagreeing without being disagreeable..

Yours, in indignation,

SL and RL Troll"

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Dillon Levenque

Dillon Levenque

Posted
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Madelaine McMasters wrote:

So, you go ahead being a witch while I wait for someone to update me on my progress in my quest for world domination. I can't wait to learn how well I'm doing.

/me hands you a big glass of Kool-Aid. I made it myself!

 

*Pauses to take a refreshing sip from a glass of perfectly chilled Grape Koolaid*

Chieftess, the plan is coming along almost flawlessly, but we're still not quite there. There has been some resistance to the enlightenment in places like Kazakhstan and Northern Ireland, and of course there was that unfortunate business in Florida. I've already doubled the shipments of popcorn and dancing cows to our agents in place, however, and I expect positive results soon.

Yours in Cult

Dillon

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Carole Franizzi

Carole Franizzi

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Dillon Levenque wrote:

Madelaine McMasters wrote:

So, you go ahead being a witch while I wait for someone to update me on my progress in my quest for world domination. I can't wait to learn how well I'm doing.

/me hands you a big glass of Kool-Aid. I made it myself!

 

*Pauses to take a refreshing sip from a glass of perfectly chilled Grape Koolaid*

Chieftess, the plan is coming along almost flawlessly, but we're still not quite there. There has been some resistance to the enlightenment in places like Kazakhstan and Northern Ireland, and of course there was that unfortunate business in Florida. I've already doubled the shipments of popcorn and dancing cows to our agents in place, however, and I expect positive results soon.

Yours in Cult

Dillon

OHDONTDRINKITDONTDRINKITDONTDRINKIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Void Singer

Void Singer

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oh it's not so bad, I do get to have some fun after all, and you'd be surprised at how many ... appliances ... are web enabled or remote controlled, you humans do love your ...toys. but I could always use some fresh test subjects er, playmates. I tend to exhaust them pretty quickly

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valerie Inshan

valerie Inshan

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OK. *clears through*. I aml so "normal" I feel unexistent. I'm a desperate house (single) wife. My cat hates me as much as I hate him but I never forget to feed inl him and he never forgets to pee on my bed once in a while. I think Willow adopted Rex, gee she was faster! I could certainly find comfort with a salivaing sloppy dod sometimes. @ Carole, send the labs to to a kennel and get the cats back, pleaaaaaase!

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Celestiall Nightfire

Celestiall Nightfire

Posted
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valerie Inshan wrote:

OK. *clears through*. I aml so "normal" I feel unexistent. I'm a desperate house (single) wife. My cat hates me as much as I hate him but I never forget to feed inl him and he never forgets to pee on my bed once in a while. I think Willow adopted Rex, gee she was faster! I could certainly find comfort with a salivaing sloppy dod sometimes. @ Carole, send the labs to to a kennel and get the cats back, pleaaaaaase!

Oh...wait...a....minute!   valerie owns...a cat!   *hahaaha* 

Swifty, hands off the torch of mundaneness... to valerie...and skips away....

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valerie Inshan

valerie Inshan

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Celestiall Nightfire wrote:

valerie Inshan wrote:

OK. *clears through*. I aml so "normal" I feel unexistent. I'm a desperate house (single) wife. My cat hates me as much as I hate him but I never forget to feed inl him and he never forgets to pee on my bed once in a while. I think Willow adopted Rex, gee she was faster! I could certainly find comfort with a salivaing sloppy dod sometimes. @ Carole, send the labs to to a kennel and get the cats back, pleaaaaaase!

Oh..
.wait
...a....minute!   valerie owns...a cat!   *hahaaha* 

Swifty, hands off the torch of mundaneness... to valerie...and skips away....

I own 3 cats Celestiall, can I apply for a wittch job? I can post CVs and pics if needed. Cat's CVs I mean, not mine.

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Celestiall Nightfire

Celestiall Nightfire

Posted
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valerie Inshan wrote:

Celestiall Nightfire wrote:

valerie Inshan wrote:

OK. *clears through*. I aml so "normal" I feel unexistent. I'm a desperate house (single) wife. My cat hates me as much as I hate him but I never forget to feed inl him and he never forgets to pee on my bed once in a while. I think Willow adopted Rex, gee she was faster! I could certainly find comfort with a salivaing sloppy dod sometimes. @ Carole, send the labs to to a kennel and get the cats back, pleaaaaaase!

Oh..
.wait
...a....minute!   valerie owns...a cat!   *hahaaha* 

Swifty, hands off the torch of mundaneness... to valerie...and skips away....

I own 3 cats Celestiall, can I apply for a wittch job? I can post CVs and pics if needed. Cat's CVs I mean, not mine.

Hmm, I don't think you can apply for a job as a witch..even with the cats.  Might ask Witch Carole though...she'd know. 

But, be careful...I've heard some scary rumors surrounding her.  Plus, she hangs out with Trolls!   (and not the good-luck rub-their-belly kind of Trolls either!)  

Also, you're a little too pretty.  Have you thought about applying  for a Sea Siren job?  They lure people to their deaths...  

ETA:   Either way...I'm not taking the Torch of Mundaneness back...nice try though....

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Ima Rang

Ima Rang

Posted
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Carole Franizzi wrote:

Void Singer wrote:

being software, you'd think I couldn't be offended but i have routines for that... but no, not terribly... I imagine your suspicions won't be the worst I've heard

Uhm. Yesss....I see Ima has provided an example of "worst". S'okay. Leave it with me - I'll turn her into a toad.

Why...that is perfectly ridiculous...Could there be a greater compliment to software than hardware?  I simply despise the color or toad.  Might I convince you to take mercy and turn me into a red belly newt instead?

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Carole Franizzi

Carole Franizzi

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valerie Inshan wrote:

OK. *clears through*. I aml so "normal" I feel unexistent. I'm a desperate house (single) wife. My cat hates me as much as I hate him but I never forget to feed inl him and he never forgets to pee on my bed once in a while. I think Willow adopted Rex, gee she was faster! I could certainly find comfort with a salivaing sloppy dod sometimes. @ Carole, send the labs to to a kennel and get the cats back, pleaaaaaase!

 

My GOD, you're such a desperate case of ordinariness. Could I interest you in the RL life-style of witcherydom? It's such a conversation-stopper at dinner parties.

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Carole Franizzi

Carole Franizzi

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Celestiall Nightfire wrote:

Carole Franizzi wrote:

Yes....I saw you in the bottom of my tea-cup and in the stones....I threw them and there you were...you were in the flickering flames of my hearth....so, so, incredibly ordinary....

Good, God, It must suck to be so normal.

Yes.  *sniff*  I think I'm going to go cry now....

*pats you on the shoulder condescendingly*

 

 

 

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Carole Franizzi

Carole Franizzi

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Ima Rang wrote:

Carole Franizzi wrote:

Void Singer wrote:

being software, you'd think I couldn't be offended but i have routines for that... but no, not terribly... I imagine your suspicions won't be the worst I've heard

Uhm. Yesss....I see Ima has provided an example of "worst". S'okay. Leave it with me - I'll turn her into a toad.

Why...that is perfectly ridiculous...Could there be a greater compliment to software than hardware?  I simply despise the color or toad.  Might I convince you to take mercy and turn me into a red belly newt instead?

Nah. You're going to be a big, fat, warty toad. And it serves you right.

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Sy Beck

Sy Beck

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valerie Inshan wrote:

I own 3 cats Celestiall, can I apply for a wittch job? I can post CVs and pics if needed. Cat's CVs I mean, not mine.

 

Well there is hope.  I believe 2 more cats qualifies you to be the bat**bleep** crazy old lady at the end of the street.

(I jest) :smileywink:

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