I think it's funny. I've accused other people of being creepy (particularly in SL)....

[Luna Bliss]

6 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

As if a Men's Studies class would study anything and not just build a garage nobody needs.

A primary area we studied is how men are socialized to not express pain or weakness, or even admit to it in some cases, and how that stunts a person as you can't process difficult experiences without knowing how you feel and dealing appropriately with those feelings.

[Theresa Tennyson]

8 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

How insensitive.  

But seriously, men are never taught that it's OK to have "feelings".  Suppressing their "feelings" leads to many men's issues, and many of the world's issues.

Try and keep up!

True - but how do you integrate that with the "warrior" mythos that's so popular with people like a certain uber-manly senator from Missouri?

[Arielle Popstar]

2 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

A primary area we studied is how men are socialized to not express pain or weakness, or even admit to it in some cases, and how that stunts a person as you can't process difficult experiences without knowing how you feel and dealing appropriately with those feelings.

Do the women then discuss their own responsibility in not in raising their sons in an appropriate way? I think in many cases woman see men who are too emotional as being creepy so though they might like to see other men as having those qualities, they aren't willing to bring up their own children in that way.

[UnilWay SpiritWeaver]

18 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Like I said, if you want to talk about men's vulnerabilities then start a new thread -- I'll be happy to contribute as I majored in Women's Studies where we studied the unique problems men have in our society.

I will agree that this reads badly, at least as written.

It's a common complaint that you might get a commission on women's health issues staffed by all male politicians or doctors. Or a study on issues in some minority community staffed by all members of that society's controlling majority population.

It's just as flawed when flipped. If one community is telling people all about the problems of another community without that discussion being spearheaded from members of the community under discussion - there's a biased perspective issue.

[Theresa Tennyson]

10 minutes ago, Arielle Popstar said:

Do the women then discuss their own responsibility in not in raising their sons in an appropriate way? I think in many cases woman see men who are too emotional as being creepy so though they might like to see other men as having those qualities, they aren't willing to bring up their own children in that way.

Of course they do.

[UnilWay SpiritWeaver]

11 minutes ago, Theresa Tennyson said:

True - but how do you integrate that with the "warrior" mythos that's so popular with people like a certain uber-manly senator from Missouri?

Well we should avoid bring politicians into any sane discussion of anything. The job of a politician is finding a wedge - any wedge - no matter how relevant or not it might be, and then expanding and deepening that wedge as much as possible in order to split people into fighting factions such that one faction will give that politician money and power in order to 'defeat' the other faction... when it was that very politician who created the factions to begin with.

In other words, politicians are in the business of creating problems that only they can save you from.

 

[kali Wylder]

To me the difference between the creepy come on and the awkward one isn't a matter of perceived entitlement exactly.  It's that one makes the hairs on the back of my neck rise up and the other invokes my pity. 

I think perhaps it's got to do with the sincerity of the come on.  The creepy one knows they are trying to get away with something and I pick that up.  The awkward one might be afraid they'll be misinterpreted as creepy and over compensate to counteract that impression.

[Luna Bliss]

17 minutes ago, UnilWay SpiritWeaver said:

1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said:

Like I said, if you want to talk about men's vulnerabilities then start a new thread -- I'll be happy to contribute as I majored in Women's Studies where we studied the unique problems men have in our society.

I will agree that this reads badly, at least as written.

It's a common complaint that you might get a commission on women's health issues staffed by all male politicians or doctors. Or a study on issues in some minority community staffed by all members of that society's controlling majority population.

It's just as flawed when flipped. If one community is telling people all about the problems of another community without that discussion being spearheaded from members of the community under discussion - there's a biased perspective issue.

Apples to oranges.

We're talking about an academic environment where people take many classes not pertaining to their particular demographic and need to have wide-based knowledge on many subjects.

And it would be literally insane to study one facet of society (women) without including the other facets that affect it. These can't be separated, even though the Women's Studies classes I took had as its primary focus on women.

*other colleges may structure this somewhat differently

Edited September 8, 2023 by Luna Bliss

[Luna Bliss]

14 minutes ago, Arielle Popstar said:

20 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

A primary area we studied is how men are socialized to not express pain or weakness, or even admit to it in some cases, and how that stunts a person as you can't process difficult experiences without knowing how you feel and dealing appropriately with those feelings.

Do the women then discuss their own responsibility in not in raising their sons in an appropriate way? I think in many cases woman see men who are too emotional as being creepy so though they might like to see other men as having those qualities, they aren't willing to bring up their own children in that way.

Of course we discuss how any behavior came to be in both women and men, and this would include the way we raise children (this is the primary way socialization occurs before interaction with the outer world @ later stages).

Women are part of this particular problem when they don't affirm the expression of feelings in their sons.

Stereotypes are thoroughly examined.

[Luna Bliss]

I've been so sad. The two primary founders of my Women's Studies department died recently, within a month of each other. They were like my mothers really.

They received great accolades for their department.

I used to go into the Women's Studies office and sit on the sofa, surrounded by photos on the wall of women who had accomplished amazing things in life. And we studied what all these women had accomplished. Previously, my History books didn't mention women much...they were mostly about war and what men did.  So there, on the wall, I saw my self represented, finally.  I existed.

Herstory

Edited September 8, 2023 by Luna Bliss

[Theresa Tennyson]

On 9/7/2023 at 3:50 PM, Paul Hexem said:

 

Men are between a rock and hard place, as the saying goes. They're expected to make the first move. Decent men don't want to be seen as creepy, or worse. So women are stuck with all the ones that don't care.

 

On 9/7/2023 at 4:24 PM, Arielle Popstar said:

Yes, the players. In some ways it is almost karma at play when some will not take the time to see past a bad or creepy intro and wind up being used by those types who know exactly how to not appear creepy even though they are the creepiest of all.

Interesting article about "nice guys" - and if you're wondering, it's written by a man...

https://www.elitedaily.com/dating/nice-guy-syndrome/1447325

[Arielle Popstar]

18 hours ago, Theresa Tennyson said:

Interesting article about "nice guys" - and if you're wondering, it's written by a man...

https://www.elitedaily.com/dating/nice-guy-syndrome/1447325

And on the other end of the spectrum we have the bad boys and the problems that can be had from them:

https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/relationships/a32314885/dating-bad-boys/