Help me understand Character Centrism vs Player Centrism

[Seicher Rae]

Did I miss something in TOS all these years (going on eleven) about the only One and True Correct Way to use SL? Because the way you are talking about things, @xTornTwilightx, that is how you are presenting yourself--as owner of the One True Way, all others are depraved. The "severity" of the problem? Yeesh. The only problem I see as what many other people have said, in various ways: Your narrow and rigid views of what SL is and is not is overly complicating your experience. This narrow interpretation IS FLAWED (I repeat myself). It is fine for you, if that is how you must use SL in order to enjoy it, but you are not everyone and not everyone has to play by your weird rules. You don't have to play by my rules, either, such as they are, but you might have more fun and less anxiety if you did.

I sometimes play a cat in SL, not a Neko, not a Furry, an actual cat. Must I disclose to everyone that in RL I am not a cat? 99% of the time I am enjoying SL in a variety of ways, none of which matter if I am a cisgender woman or not. The 1% of the time it matters, you betcha I disclose what needs to be disclosed.

Nowhere in this thread has anyone stated that one avatar's actions/mode of being can't or won't have an impact on another--as you asserted that we did. That's silly. Of course it matters, in some very specific situations. In 99% of the ways I interact with SL, I have zero impact on anyone else, unless it is to make them wealthier by me shopping too much. 

Playing a man when you are a woman has been discussed to death in Forums since way before this iteration. Every time it comes up the overwhelming response is: Who cares? Do it if you want but don't do it to hurt people. Don't do it to catfish. Don't do it to cheat on someone else. Basically, don't be a di*k about it. Getting into a "serious" relationship and lying to the person behind the other screen is most people's idea of being a di*k. How hard is that to understand? Why all the mental machinations over something that incredibly simple?

If you don't like the types of folks who put their RL photos into their profiles, then... gosh, don't hang out with them. Concept. I don't happen to like it either, but for an entirely different reason: It messes with my immersion. I still talk to those folks though, but they won't force me to give up my RL image or information. See how that works?

This is me, as a cat Gato Gateau. I'm voice verified that I am not a cat in RL. At this moment Gato is gender unspecified... should the grid be worried?

 

Edited March 30, 2020 by Seicher Rae

[FairreLilette]

On 3/26/2020 at 8:20 PM, xTornTwilightx said:

No RP - This is player centrism. It comes in a dozen flavors. I'll start with the most obvious, obnoxious, and baffling example. "Hey girl, I'm 6'3 IRL, you think thats hot?" This is someone projecting "themselves" into SL. Its so weird to a soft RP'r like me because like, wouldn't it be way better to make your character look like you then say, "Hey, notice how tall I am? Hot isn't it? Want to grab a drink?" Also why is this guy "himself" but I am my character? Ok sure, maybe he says the same thing to every first day Ruth but I doubt it. Anyway lets keep going.

I think you are trying to control things and people that are not in your control.  You need to go with the flow or get into "hard role play" as you described in your OP in a specified group.  

Also, when people say things like "I am my character" or "I am my avatar" I've taken it to mean their demeanor not the way they look.  

If you want to be with avatars that strive to look like their RL selves you could create such a group but otherwise you are trying to control things that are not controllable nor do they need to be unless it's a strict RP experience or group.  

 

 

Edited March 31, 2020 by FairreLilette

[Amanda Crisp]

On 3/28/2020 at 2:42 AM, xTornTwilightx said:

I decide to play a male character. I get into a serious relationship with a girl character. Some people would say I'm obligated to tell her I'm really a girl. Others would say If I'm representing myself as a male character I absolutely should not tell her about who I am in real life. Others would say that unless I exhibit concrete gender dysphoria then I should absolutely not be presenting myself as a male to other players, *especially* in a serious relationship. The last one might sound nice until you think about it for five seconds and realize it means that your real life *you* must be represented to your best ability in the appearance and mannerisms of your avatar.

The following is based on my experience in large, purpose-made roleplay sims with specific themes, I generally did not RP outside the formal setting:

My past experience with role playing and moderating roleplay has been this; we *all* knew we were there to act out out the parts of characters in a free form play - so we maintained a hard line between In Character and Out Of Character. 

There was no expectation that anyone’s character IN ANY WAY resembled the RL person or their personality.

So, if the relationship was all IC (In character) then there was no pressure to disclose any of your RL self. It was considered normal not to even ask and awkward if you did.

If the relationship had one party who was interested in the other OUTSIDE the IC one, then a bracketed (Out of Character) conversation takes place about it in which the players discuss this.

Considering that OOC relationships tended to spoil the IC one (jealousy), it was not infrequent for the player making the OOC romantic moves to get a response that looked like this;

Player2: (( I’m sorry, but I don’t OOC with anyone from the Sim/RP. Let’s have fun IC. ))

Thats usually when you discover whether or not the person who asked you to OOC Romance is really committed to the RP or not.

”or Not” usually entailed drama, accusations and sometimes Moderator Involvement.

So....anyone crossing the OOC line within their RP sim tended to keep it on the down-low back in the Day (in the sims I hung out in).