[Is "Mass blocking" a strategy? Also a rant]

Welcome to Second Life!

One thing to consider when messaging people “in the blind” is that SL is home to many amazing people as well as people like me whose social skills are “different”. Some people WANT interaction, but when they’re spoken to they kinda freeze up like a deer in the headlights.

Its also possible that the interesting profile might belong to a character being used as a ‘Bot to fluff a venue’s traffic numbers (we have no small number of those) and doesn’t have anyone actually monitoring its chat-stream.

Another thing I’ve encountered while DJing is the avatar who goes clubbing in SL, but keeps their attention fixed on the Skype/Discord Voice convo they have going with their clique of similarly-fixated friends. They’re not interested in text conversation with the rest of us and that might explain a few of the “terse” answers.

Finally, you have the Phobic-Paranoics who might have a deep-seated fear that “every female avatar who speaks first and won’t Voice is probably a guy in RL” (I’ve been told that by several perpetually-single male avatars). Its best to leave that lot to their Bubble IMHO.

Personally, I just mute the rude or annoying ones and move along.  Joining SL Groups that match your interests are a great way to find friends to interact with, and back in 2005 I found the SL Partner I’ve had ever since then by just going shopping (for hair, not a Partner) 🙂

I wish you only good things as you explore the grid and if I can help at all, feel free to ping me 🙂

 

[Identifying an alt]

27 minutes ago, Katz Republic said:

 I did have one customer literally buy almost everything in my store, which is a bit unusual, so I looked at their MP store. I didn't see my things being used in anything they made. So it does make you wonder what they are doing with the stuff.

Maybe she just thought you were hot and wanted to get your attention?

 

[Tips rage]

When I was DJing, my idea of “acceptable tips” was “anything that helps defray the cost of buying new music”.

Purchasing software to generate a quality stream isn’t free, leasing bandwidth TO stream isn’t free and actually owning the copies of the music  (so that the artist eventually gets their piece) costs.

I’d bear the costs of software and bandwidth, but if people want to tip in order to help me play specific new things - then contributions were appreciated but not required.

I never saw SL as an income stream, but if someone is happy with what they hear and wants to make SL less of a money-pit for the ones streaming it; that was awesome.

 

 

[It's funny when those few that purport to live by kindness in SL tend to be the biggest a-holes]

People are people. 

I’ve run foul of “land barons” in SL and my personal thought is that people who are here to be SL Capitalists on a large scale are differently-motivated than those of us whole motivations are social or artistic. Not better or worse; just “different” enough to impede understanding.

That being said, I also knew One who was a wonderful human being - whom I wish was still among the living- and who disproved the previous paragraph.

Its good to have exceptional people like that; they foster hope.

Anyway, I’m sorry you ran foul of someone who failed to Walk the Talk. Tomorrow is another day and it’s a big grid 🙂 

We still have some good people here!

 

[If your avatar was in a band...]

Metal, probably Finnish Operatic Metal 🙂

 

 

 

[Voice Verified?]

Voice Verification is a thing for people looking for RL love in a world of digital fantasy 🙂

If thats their thing, I see no harm in it.....

Its a big multiverse !

[When Did it Become Acceptable to Bring Politic of Hate into SL?]

14 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

Ok, yes I see from further comments that you're not implying Blaise is virtue-signalling.

I just want to point out though, that one can be very strident in arguing for their side, or lack social skills required for debating, or demonize the other side, or say they believe the other side is totally wrong -- but this does not have to mean they are virtue-signalling -- virtue signalling means someone is being fake & putting on a show to feel superior by appearing to champion a cause, & not really caring about the issue they're pushing for.

I absolutely agree.

I do feel that we need to build bridges and not walls every chance we get. Our neighbors are not the Enemy (Even the more pugnacious ones), so I’m “keen” on treating them the way I would treat a friend when we must disagree on something.

The polarization that exists today will not be solved by One Big Thing, but by lots of people finding ways to resolve their issues without building grudges in the process.

How we get along together determines the shape of our grandchildren’s world; I’d like that world to be better.

[When Did it Become Acceptable to Bring Politic of Hate into SL?]

1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said:

I don't see that Blaise was virtue-signalling with her concerns.

Virtue-signalling is driven by vanity and self-aggrandizement, not concern with others. When you accuse someone of virtue signalling you are accusing them of a kind of hypocrisy, saying they are not concerned with the issues but instead are concerned with displaying themselves in the best possible light.
It's a huge insult to accuse another of this, and also a way to dismiss another's ideas instead of attempting to debate the issue. As such, it is an ad hominem attack.

 

Blaise wasn’t, I was discussing the whole mileu of “call out culture” which has been growing for some time and the self-discipline required -not- to just try and shout people down or ridicule them.

I’d rather change minds, whereas many in this day and age will settle for cowing people into temporary and insincere silence.

But for Blaise’s post - I was not intentionally making any such inference .

I prefer to be very direct with personal criticism and if any such is ever offered, it will be accompanied by a pronoun signifying a single individual.

[When Did it Become Acceptable to Bring Politic of Hate into SL?]

2 hours ago, Blaise Glendevon said:

There are some things, however, that are not matters for disagreement. To go back to the initial post regarding the MAGAt the OP encountered, the human rights of asylum seekers is not a matter of opinion. The rights of trans kids in public education is not a matter of opinion. The existence of global climate change and the need for restrictions on industry to protect the quality of air and water in the communities around them is not a matter of opinion. The dangers of both coal mining and coal use when alternative fuels exist is not a matter of opinion. The discriminatory practices of police, prosecutors, and prison correctional officers in regards to race are not a matter of opinion. The overreach of the military industrial complex into the pockets of the federal government isn't a matter of opinion.

You can't just 'agree to disagree' with bigotry and greed. 

But we can address it like mature adults without trying to personally demonize anyone who is not perfectly in alignment with our point of view.

It *feels* good to take a virtue-signaling, morally-superior stance, but it also reduces any chance of swaying the objects of ridicule over to a different way of thinking. If we fail to persuade, we only guarantee that the squabble becomes generational. This requires great patience.

Personally, in RL I’m against trying to mute/de-platform people who disagree with me; I *want* to have the discussion if I feel like an idea has merit. Also because persuasion is more powerful than shunning or shaming. Does it always work? No, but I value my own freedom of thought and expression enough not to want to deny it to others.

There are limits....things like pornography and “not suitable for all ages” topics of course.

Both major political parties in the USA are rolling in the gutter and catering to their particular mobs, so are the governments of some other “secular democracies”. This is why I prefer not to drag that stuff into my Second Life 🙂

 

[Text or Voice?]

Text for two reasons.

#1 - Following a stroke I can to a good imitation of Porky Pig or of just being drunk without even trying. I can’t stop it either. Some people hear me speak and for some reason seem to believe I’m intellectually impaired, which crops up in all sorts of social/business interactions and has driven me to be more happy with my Inner Introvert.

#2 - Pre-Stroke when I was using voice chat over the internet, someone overhead a member of my family Speaking in the background (my daughter) and figured out enough based on that to romance-harass me in RL. I have more control over the flow of information in Text and I like it that way.

 

[When Did it Become Acceptable to Bring Politic of Hate into SL?]

The really sad thing is that people tend to conflate “disagree” with “hate”.

Civilized people can respectfully disagree, but civilization is a choice.

[Do gay/bi women outnumber straight women in SL?]

47 minutes ago, sugarheffalump said:

Even though I’m also surprised by that, I can appreciate that some persons prefer living their second lives that way. Maybe hoping to perfect their dream life?

I truly enjoy being around people who - in SL - have used it as an aspirational experience. The folks who are here to be “better than whatever Real Life dealt them” are generally a lot of fun and very open-minded where it comes to getting along with others here.

Conversely, I’m polite to the people who seem to believe that SL should be “Digital Real Life” - but I tend not to hang around them long 🙂

Real Life tried to kill me at least once. I’m sticking with my Safe Space :-)

 

[Do gay/bi women outnumber straight women in SL?]

Second Life is the realm of Imagination. If someone chooses to re-enact RL here, that’s their choice and I respect it - but personally I believe they’re limiting their options.

Thats perfectly fine; other people don’t exist to satisfy *my* ideas and aesthetics; they should satisfy their own.

If we as a species ever acquire the knack of not Imposing Our ideas on one another, we might just survive and even be occasionally happy .....

 

[Do gay/bi women outnumber straight women in SL?]

So people expect to go to a place with “your world, your imagination” as its motto and find people slavishly recreating their actual Real Lives there?

Hmmmm..........

 

[When Did it Become Acceptable to Bring Politic of Hate into SL?]

11 hours ago, Samie Bagley said:

In these last two days, I had encounters with Trump supporters who filled their profiles with hateful messages. Specifically, profile pictures showing gun violence, groups promoting lies that were discredit by US and UK intelligence, and groups promoting violence toward others. All were reported to LL.

As a result of these encounter and awareness of LL's permissible attitude toward the introduction of politics of hate in SL, I am no longer a premium member. I refuse to financially support an organization that allows the spewing of hate as evidenced by my encounters with MAGATS.

I am deeply disappointed at LL's lack of action in the insertion of politics into SL, and even more disappointed with the LL's inaction toward the infusion of politics of hate in SL.  I am wondering of anyone else has had similar experiences and how people have handled/reacted/felt in these situations. 

 

Best regards,

 

-Pebbles

I do my best to keep my SL free of crusading Political radicals of ANY stripe.

I have muted people before, I will do it again 🙂

SL is my respite from Conservatives and Liberals and anyone who insists on imposing their views on me; I plan to keep it that way.

[The 40+ crowd! Do you exist in SL?]

17 hours ago, SeikariTheMierianShadow said:

I'm 30... ish ( Not 40 yet) But I'm always up for meeting new people and new friends.... unfortunately I'm not gay and I don't identify as a woman either ( Non Binary ) 

But I do wish you luck - smiles.- 

 

For what its worth, as my time in SL has piled up on the clock - more and more my “standards” are non traditional when it come to attractiveness.

If I encounter someone who creates an aesthetically pleasing avatar and whose typist possesses a fun personality; we can be friends without it ever occurring to me to inquire as to what biological pigeonhole they fit into.

I have some teenage emotional damage that makes male avatars a little *less* aesthetically-pleasing than female ones (this distresses me) but beyond that; its all about personality.

Some people would call that “jaded” but I like to think of it as “seeing with better eyes”

Maybe SL has evolved me?

Luckily, my Partner is my #1 “Attractiveness standard” - and after nearly 15 years that is a wonderful thing 🙂

 

[The 40+ crowd! Do you exist in SL?]

8 hours ago, Catrie said:

lol I'd have to agree.  I somehow tend to gravitate to the 20 somethings, who act closer to 40 than I do. lol

My theory is based on the success of 80’s music venues in SL 🙂. Either the music of my wilder days is enjoying a comeback with much younger people; or a lot of us are enjoying the ability to defy both the calendar and gravity 🙂

That being said, I *love* Second Life and personally think that the capability to appear as we see ourselves is wonderful.

I really would rather not see what anyone looks like in RL; I enjoy being around them here in SL and RL doesn’t matter to me :-)

 

[The 40+ crowd! Do you exist in SL?]

My unscientific theory is that SL is mostly over-40’s roleplaying 20-somethings.....

Me included....

[Gopi's Christmas/Holiday Giveaway!]

[how can she know i have 2 accounts]

Personally, I take it as a “given” that anyone over a year-old in SL has alts. There are exceptions of course.

I shifted to an Alt as my Main after running foul of a persistent Stalker (LL could do nothing about), so “Alt” is not a dirty word to me.

Occasionally I run into people who play alt-games, but I don’t devote a lot of time to playing Spot-The-Alt.  I’m here to relax and have fun, I have enough professional paranoia in my RL 🙂

 

[Cost Of Name Changes Out Of The Bag]

I really wish that any unclaimed name combinations using *original* last-names could be opened back up.

 

[Deadheads - the final word]

52 minutes ago, Matty Luminos said:

Eh, I think I'm either just a bit too young, or on the wrong continent. I never even heard of the Grateful Dead until about 10 years ago. They were ok, I guess, I don't hate their music, but I couldn't name even one of their songs. 

I guess you had to be at Woodstock to appreciate them? Or at least belong to the generation that was listening to American music at the time. 

I was never much into the Dead, but their music did have a fairly long intergenerational following. Of course, I’m a Boomer so my opinion may not be relevant 🙂

I’m more into FFDP myself, a vast body of their music speaks directly to my soul :-)

[Election advice]

16 hours ago, Alwin Alcott said:

i vote for keeping RL politics OUT OF SL and for sure OUT OF THE FORUMS

Alwin, I have sympathy for your position. RL international politics radically changed my life back in March of 1994 and my preference is to keep RL squabbles out of SL.

My compromise with Freedom of Thought & Expression is to UnFollow threads that become too painful. It bothers me that I might - in doing so - be somewhat disrespectful of the Posters, but I have learned to deal proactively with my own mental hygiene. I slept about 4 hours a night for some years after my adventures and I don’t care to evoke those memories if I can avoid them 🙂

 

[Election advice]

[Necro threads - what's the big deal?]

Personally, I always suspected that the hostility towards Residents who Necropost was driven by the rising storm of “alert” emails that reopening a contentious thread brings on.

Residents who are new to Forums often search for interesting topics to respond to as a means of introducing themselves. Unfortunately, that reignites the storm of *email alert*, *email alert*, *email alert*..... And rage ensues.

Personally, I regularly unfollow old material in my account settings and this seems to handle this without having to shut off email alerts completely.