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Amanda Crisp

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Posts posted by Amanda Crisp

  1. Most RL relationships fail over money.

    My Partner and I have always gone 50-50 on property and decorations and that’s seen us for 15+ years total together online.

    That’s what works for me, but your mileage may differ 🙂



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  2. I really want a feature that allows for Community  Naming of avatars.

    ”Social Acclaim” Version

    You pay nothing, any accumulated Warning Points get wiped away and your Friends get to pick a descriptive last name for you that you must keep for a year.

    ”Restorative Justice” Version

    You get all the above as well as an additional bonus “all your vanished inventory is returned to you”. In return, the top three avatars who have filed ARs against you get to pick your last name.


    • Haha 1
  3. I’ve been in a LONG term SL relationship and I love the other Human very much.


    ”Are SL relationships the same as RL?”

    Not really, because = Alts

    I’ve been (counting my Original) in SL since 2005. One recurring theme has been; “I thought everything was good, then I learned about my Lover/Partner/SO’s alt and their whole other life - and I feel betrayed.”

    Bigamists are a thing in Real Life, but SL makes it a lot easier for those so-inclined.

    SL can be a great enabler for those who treat their relationships and lovers as Disposable, so my thought is this; if you find someone good - treat them good 🙂

    You can easily stress out over the possibilities, so either not caring or  learning to deal with that is probably the secret of a Long Term SL Relationship.


  4. The prevalence of “Insta-Dom” in SL makes it more difficult as you have to weed through the once who don’t really have experience or the gumption to learn.

    Just my suggestion; probably steer clear of anyone who has “Master” as part of their SL name. If someone projects the charisma for that role, you’ll know it and not all the titles or Display Names in the world can cover for the lack of it.

    Also be sure you *want* a Dominant. Many people just want a lover to play around with and occasionally venture into Kink.

    The larger and more established BDSM groups/clubs are a good place to start. Go meet people, talk about what you’re looking for and what you offer - and see what evolves.


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  5. I DJ and also visit a lot of other clubs, so I can speak to how *I* handle tipping.

    When I go somewhere to hear another DJ;

    -I tip when I make a song-request, about L200 because this has the DJ taking their eyes off local chat, shuffling a playlist and possibly having to DL a song.

    -I tip late in the set. Around L200-300 if it was an average night, “400-600” if it was amazing and around L100 if it was “meh”. A “zero-tip” is kind of a statement and I reserve that for DJ’s who are personally obnoxious to their guests. Lately, that seems to mean DJ’s who *push* RL politics during their set (I come to SL to escape that noise).

    -I often tip 50-100 early in a set if the DJ happens to play something I’m sentimental about. I also might toss double-that in if the DJ is new and trying very hard to get their game up 🙂

    Note: I have an inworld job that funds my tipping-habits. Times are hard and if someone can’t afford to tip, they should IMHO still be able to come, dance and be welcome.

    When I am DJing;

    -I expect nothing.

    I DJ because I love music and I love the friends I make while I’m out there. If people make a choice to tip me, I’m gratified but I don’t feel the HAVE to.

    SL is entertainment and stress-relief for me, the stance I take towards anything I do here is “do it because I like doing it; not because I’m making a living at it”




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  6. OK, I was looking at my Flickr feed and it struck me that “many” of my older SL shots would have an entirely different context nowadays.....

    Please post-away but *pweese* go for funny and not depressing. RL had enough “depressing” to go around.

    My first shot; 


    ”So you’re a talking Cat-Owl who gives stock tips?  Big deal buddy....SIX FOOT SPACING, RIGHT NOW!”

    "Hooman, we need to discuss your mating habits..."


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  7. This is kind of a ramble on how my tastes/views seem to have changed and how THAT led me to see SL kink more broadly,

    So all told, I’ve been in SL since 2005 continuously, altho I got stalked into changing my avatar at one point.

    Like many others, I “matriculated” through Pixel Sex Culture and in SL, much of that is bound into BDSM.

    Literally, I was here like 5 minutes when someone was in my IMs asking if I’d considered Gor..... (I hadn’t; I’m no-Gor)

    Personally, I like structured relationships and SL-BDSM-done-responsibly isn’t freaky in my book. People are mostly sexual, much of sex involves some degree of Kink....it’s fairly normal IMHO.

    But - in SL we also see a lot of drama/toil related to “1st Time Master/Mistress/Submissive w No Experience” or just people with very unrealistic expectations. That leaves some (not all) with a real downer on SL Erotics in general if they over-committed or had an over-committed Submissive vanish or wander into trouble.

    So I noticed as I went along that it was always a good idea for people with an interest to ask themselves this;

    ”Do I really want a full-blown BDSM Top-Bottom Lifestyle? Or do I want kinky SEX and then back to my normal SL?”

    Based on 15 years of observing, I think we have a smaller contingent who have both the desire and suitability to maintain a full-on BDSM relationship and a larger one that just wants some kink in their lives.

    I guess my closing thought is that anyone considering entering into a BDSM relationship should ask themselves that same question before committing.

    Commitment is beautiful between Top & Bottom, but if you’re just wanting some temporary fun - don’t make a formal commitment until you’re ready.

    Disclaimer: There are myriad variations on Kinky/BDSM relationships, including ones that are “casual”. I am not making a negative judgement on anyone or their choices; just saying “thinking about what you want in advance is respectful to everyone involved.”


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  8. I work sort of an overnight shift, so my experience has a split personality. 

    I make it on for 2 hours un U.S. Prime Time (GMT-6) @ 6pm SL and have people around, then come back after work for a little bit at about 3pm GMT and find a “differently” populated SL 🙂

    Maybe if you tailor your venue-search by RL geography?  

    Where possible, look for Euro-run events when Europe is on Prime Time, ditto for the US and the Pacific

    I *really* like hanging around with Australia (GMT+15) when I can work out the times and not be at work or asleep 🙂


  9. 4 minutes ago, RowanMinx said:

    I agree and prefer one on one encounters.  I was speaking to the overabundance of bisexual women in SL and the possible reason behind it.  The fact is the geometry works better with 2 men and one woman. 

    The great heartache of kissing girls in the club; when only one is pretending 😞

  10. Before he was Daryl and the Dead Walked.....he was a Boondock Saint......


    ...OK, full disclosure. When I typed this originally I typoed an “I” Instead of the last “O” in Boondock. I caught it fast, but as you-all might find that hysterical I decided to tell on myself......


  11. 18 minutes ago, RowanMinx said:

    This may be true in RL but I know for a fact a lot of women in SL use bisexuality to attract men.  As far as men wanting 2 women in bed, again this may not apply in RL but it dang sure does in SL.  

    IMHO 3+ in a sexual liaison is more of a geometry problem  🙂

    Sometimes its nice to get lost in the crowd; unless its in the bedroom ........



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  12. 1 hour ago, Paul Hexem said:

    I suspect most people will be the same in SL as RL. Preference is preference. You might expand in SL a little, but you'd have to be at least a little into it in RL to get any enjoyment out of it, I think.

    Paul, I agree with that statement.

    That would also cover the ones who are secretive in RL about their sexuality, but can live it openly in SL.

    They are consistent between RL and SL, just more open in SL.


    • Like 1
  13. 15 hours ago, Rolig Loon said:

    That may be true in some parts of SL, and I am prepared to believe it's true in the specific sector that you are focusing on. A non-voice DJ would probably be at a disadvantage. I haven't spent much time in SL clubs for at least ten years now, though. Wandering around most of SL myself, I rarely run across people using voice.  I have mine switched on so that I can hear voice if it's being used, but I have never used it myself since it was introduced in 2007, and very few of my friends do.  I suspect that "voice-centric" really depends on where you are in SL.

    I’d say you’re right Rolig! Here in SL, I’m married into the Club biz (happily) so that probably defines my experiences.

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