A short Story I have been writing.

[jujmental]

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Perrie Juran wrote:

 

 it still is after all the Author's story to tell.

 

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What he said!

Nevertheless, if you wish to invite criticism of such a short, minutiae-replete extract, with little evidence of characterisation, plot or any of those other essential components of a "story", effectively inviting comment on style, I feel it is incumbent upon you to present your miniscule opus in a manner which mitigates distraction by "technical" errors.

© The Judge

[Storm Clarence]

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Perrie Juran wrote:

Sebastian Junger spends an entire chapter on wave dynamics.  Somewhat technical and tedious to wade through it adds depth to the story, enhancing our understanding of what the crew of the Andrea Gail was up against.

 

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The "Perfect Storm" was extremely well written.  I felt like I was there.  Like I was on the ocean both as a fisherman and as a PJ.  He wrote perfectly what it would have been like to drown when the fisherman was pulled in when he got caught on the line.   What it was like for the PJ's treading water in a hurricane; there was no air just water.    

I really, really enjoyed this book.  I still find occasion to think back and reflect on his words. 

[Perrie Juran]

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Storm Clarence wrote:

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Perrie Juran wrote:

Sebastian Junger spends an entire chapter on wave dynamics.  Somewhat technical and tedious to wade through it adds depth to the story, enhancing our understanding of what the crew of the Andrea Gail was up against.

 

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The "Perfect Storm" was extremely well written.  I felt like I was there.  Like I was on the ocean both as a fisherman and as a PJ.  He wrote perfectly what it would have been like to drown when the fisherman was pulled in when he got caught on the line.   What it was like for the PJ's treading water in a hurricane; there was no air just water.    

I really, really enjoyed this book.  I still find occasion to think back and reflect on his words. 

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It is one of my favorite books and actually I have read it several times.

Have you read Alan Gurney's "Compass?"   Another nautical favorite of mine.

[Knowl Paine]

 

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Storm Clarence wrote:

   I admire 'great' writers.  I consider my friend Pep to be an excellent writer and teacher of the English language.  If you 'listen' to what he really writes you will learn something.  I have learned much, but the one most important 'thing' I have learned from Pep was "to break the rules, you must first master them."   That, Knowl, is one heck of an insight to heed.                 

 

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I have enjoyed reading many comments from Pep.

Thank you for sharing that insight, it is great advice.

I have plenty to learn about writing. The idea of making something larger than life, can be very humbling.

 

[Knowl Paine]

Thinking about the books I have read that I really enjoyed, made me chuckle. They're Award winning authors.

I like building in SL, and creative writing is very similar. I read a short story that advertised the Secret of Greystone, and never told the secret. I wanted to call the author to complain. I can think of several characters in the last book I read who fit your resume only description. I would like to avoid that.

I've missed a few opportunities to write. A small introduction is exactly that. The replies have helped in providing direction.

Thank you

 

[Panther Miklos]

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Perrie Juran wrote:

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Panther Miklos wrote:

 

The last piece of advice, which is huge to me, the devil really is in the detail.  I abhor having to mire through several paragraphs (or even one really) telling me exactly the density and thread count of the dadblasted sheets.  Argh!  Stories are an adventure and as such the reader needs a wee bit of room to add their own selves to that adventure.  Maybe I don't want 500 count cotten sheets - flannel suits me just fine. :matte-motes-wink-tongue:

Best of writings to you.

 

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Then write your own book.  Or stick with the Classics Illustrated comic book versions.

Melville spent around 30 pages on the significance of the color white.  Would you rather the Whale was colorless so you could insert your own color and chase your own demons? 

Sebastian Younger spends an entire chapter on wave dynamics.  Somewhat technical and tedious to wade through it adds depth to the story, enhancing our understanding of what the crew of the Andrea Gail was up against.

Just because you miss the significance of the 500 count sheets does not mean that others will.

And it still is after all the Author's story to tell.

 

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Wholly guacamole, Perrie.  For such a jovial and otherwise enjoyable martian, it certainly seems as though the grumpy bug got up under that helmet of yours and bit you straight on the noggin.  Knowl invited feedback.  I indulged by giving my personal advice based upon my opinion.  No need to go hogwild.

Without your knowing my history, I had to chuckle at the assertion that I 'stick with classic illustrated comic book versions.'  I do so wish, for the books I have written, that I could have taken the illustrated comic book version route.  Sadly, the collegiate world would have most likely frowned upon that.

I will concede your point in that the masters (classics if you will) dealt with detail in a very rich and enhancing manner.  Those endless details did not detract from the telling in any fashion.  Something greatly missing from many of todays writings.

Now, if you don't mind... Might I borrow that box of colors?  I've got this rather nifty drawing my wee one sat on my desk and it's calling my name to color outside its lines. :matte-motes-wink:    Have a great evening, Perrie - watch out for those grumpy bugs.