Love Letters

[Storm Clarence]

There was a time that when ever I login I would need to spend about 15 minutes reading, laughing, and whacking all the hate mail (PM', IM's) in my inbox. Those were the good days.

These days, and although I still get my share of the hate, I find myself reading mostly 'love lettters'. And not just one or two, but many. Now I know what most of you are thinking... that Venus and her alts write all these letters to me. Well, all I can say is that I read her letters as well (and I know her alt.)

But seriously, I never responded to the hate so I have to ask should I respond to the love?
Can you also provide some examples of what a responsible response should read like?

[Storm Clarence]

There was a time that when ever I login I would need to spend about 15 minutes reading, laughing, and whacking all the hate mail (PM', IM's) in my inbox. Those were the good days.

These days, and although I still get my share of the hate, I find myself reading mostly 'love lettters'. And not just one or two, but many. Now I know what most of you are thinking... that Venus and her alts write all these letters to me. Well, all I can say is that I read her letters as well (and I know her alt.)

But seriously, I never responded to the hate so I have to ask should I respond to the love?
Can you also provide some examples of what a responsible response should read like?

[Deltango Vale]

Dear Storm,

How delightful to receive your charming love letter. I can't say I'm surprised, I mean, after all these years, but it comes now at a most inopportune time. Sigh, as you know, I must fend off dozens of such letters daily and do so with grace and sympathy. Fortunately, in your case, you are courted solely by women and, being a wise and experienced man of the world, you need only employ a single style: the gentle deflection of amorous glances and subtle entreaties. I, on the other hand, am courted by both sexes, the fair and the fearless. The deflection of a tender kiss (of which you are so familiar) compares poorly with the rebuffing of coarse solicitations. These, my dear, require an extra layer of tact and understanding.

You no doubt begin to read into my words the direction of my heart. As a suave and sophisticated man, you perceive the layers of meaning sprinkled ever so gently in this reply. Were it any other man, I would employ greater precision of language, sacrificing, of course, much of the civility I am showing you as an old and trusted friend.

It is with sincere tenderness, then, that I encourage you to seek another woman more suited to your immediate needs. It is not that I don't admire and, indeed, respond physically to your wit and charm; it is more that my die is cast on another board far distant from your own. We are, sadly, separated by forces far greater than any feelings we may have for each other. As you know, I am bound by honor to another in ways that you, as a man of honor, would respect and admire, nay seek for yourself in a partner. We are, dear friend, of a single mind and, as I have always known you to be gracious toward the fairer sex, I know you will extend the same courtesy to me.

With kindness,

Del

[Storm Clarence]

 

[Deltango Vale]

Oscar Wilde in Paris sent a telegram to his publisher in the UK to inquire how his new book was doing.

His message read: “?”

The publisher replied: “!”

[Pie Serendipity]

Love letters?

In English that would be ILY.

When you are talking about love, French letters are a different thing.

JTM.