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Everything posted by Efurou

  1. Brett Alderton wrote: I know of several couples that are in very solid happy marriages/relationships. They both engage in online relationships and sex and they enjoy this mutual escapism, sharing stories of their intimate encounters and SL and other virtual sex mediums are just another form of erotica they use to enhance their sex lives. Ultimately we have no right to judge anyone morally as no one has the right to insist that everyone lives by the same moral and ethical code. It is down to ourselves to decide what we define as acceptable behavior choosing our friends, relationships and l
  2. Verena Vuckovic wrote: I completely disagree. I think anyone who wants to have a partner AND to bonk anything that moves is trying to have their cake and eat it. After all, in what sense is a person a partner ? There surely has to be some factor that elevates a partner above the level of someone that one meets and engages with for 5 minutes.......and if one is doing sex with one's 'partner; and with other people, then what conceivable meaning is there to that specific 'partner' label ??? It becomes utterly meaningless. So....people should have open relationships or have partners. The blame h
  3. Cali Souther wrote: haha .. I have to agree... An open relationship is just FWB. :-) Cali, you can make that call for yourself and for your own relationships. But many people live in long term, meaningful, serious, and very loving open relationships. Telling them they are only friends with benefits is offensive. I am not saying an open relationship is for everyone. We all have to figure that out for ourselves. I am also not saying that open relationships are better for everyone. An open relationship is better for me - and you cannot tell me I am just FWB with my long term partner.
  4. Perrie: "It's been a very long time since I've heard any one say 'soul mate' to me. How anyone could declare they'd met their soul mate after only knowing someone for two days is generally beyond me. Relationships take time and work to build. Also, I have found at least in my experience that very few knew the actual origin and meaning of the concept of "soul mate." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- That is why I had the word soulmate in paranthesis. I always
  5. Perrie: "I'm wondering if you meant to use the word "negotiated" here. If I agree to do something that is not my 'nature' eventually my nature may win out. You either accept who each other is or you don't." Hello Perrie, I did mean to use the word negotiated. That does not mean someone can be talked into something that they are not! It does not mean that a person who prefers monogamy should be talked into accepting an open or poly relationship. It means that people who are in a relationship have to be open and honest what their limits are, what their expectations are - and they have to
  6. Syo Emerald wrote: Isn't it selfish to live without any limits, any boundaries or borders...just because someone can't keep their eyes at the person they say they love? Respect has also both sides. Now your only looking at one side, just seeing ones fantasies and desires not full complete, making it look like theres a poor victim. Whats with the other person? Is it love if one has to give up anything and live in constand fear and bad feelings? I don't think so. Every relationship has limits. In case of open relationships they are usually negotiated and agreed upon. Having an open re
  7. I beg to differ Danicah. Maybe an open relationship would not work for you - I can accept that without any argument. But you cannot say that open relationships never work long term. I am in a long term rl relationship that has been an open relationship from the beginning. We are commited, we are in love - and you cannot tell me that my relationship is not a deep, meaningful, passionate, loving, and lasting one. It has lasted for quite a few years now and I do not see that changing any time soon. My boyfriend is NOT messing around - he is having relationships with other women at times with my
  8. As someone else said already - difficult to give advice when you don't say what you are interested in. But I think it is a good thing to have the basics down...you know.... Taking turns No godmodding No metagaming A good IC and OOC separation ICA = ICC Make your character interesting and not undefeatable Think of an intersting backstory Make sure you know at least the basic things of the world or period you want to play in Dress the part ALWAYS read the sim rules and respect that you are basically in someone's house - you know, when in Rome, do as the Romans do....
  9. Well the OP could seduce him and have a hot one night stand with the guy - just to show her friend what an ass he is of course. Sacrificing herself....basically...... joking.....just joking....really....
  10. I disagree with that Jasmyn. I know quite a few people who met in sl and they arre now married - happily married. I am also for being very careful and not just trusting people in sl. But if a relationship does develop - taking it rl can be done the right way. Not making plans to move in together right away and things like that. Setting up a neutral meeting - at a public place - all those safety precautions....and then people can begin to slowly build their relationship in rl. Nothing wrong with that in my opinion.
  11. I know couples who met in sl - who are now living together rl - or are married rl. It can definitely happen that you meet someone in sl and it turns out to be a long term relationship in rl. But! I would not have too high expectations before actually meeting and spending rl time together. Everything can be different the moment you actually meet the person rl. So, I would definitely want to meet the person in rl to see if something more real can develop from that sl relationship - but I would not plan on moving or anything - I would just want to meet the person for a short vacation or somethin
  12. I always see most sl relationship as someting tht happens a lot faster then most rl relationships. People claim to fall in love quick, they claim they know each other - they partner - and just as fast those relationships are history because they next shiny things comes along - and the cycle begins all over again. For me - there is nothing wrong with this as long as people are not blatantly dishonest and do not intentionally hurt others. I do belive having a long term monogamous relationship in sl is quite difficult. In rl there is simply so much more to be experienced - to be found out about
  13. Dear Herpes, you might take this whole role play thing - especially the gorean rp thing a bit too seriously. I do goren rp too - I play one of those slaves you say are there for your sexual gratification. But only my character is - the person behind that avatar will fade a sex scene to black so fast that your head will spin - if I dont feel like playing it. It is role play you know - make belief - we are all just pretending and stuff.... Anyway - to the OP. He needs to consider that his relationship was not very healthy to begin with - even before the neighbour lady stepped on the sce
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