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About Staralien

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  1. This is so sad. I agree with Phil and Darius. I really feel for that poor man. I hope he doesn't end up needing therapy. In that case, you should consider paying for it. Deception is never OK, no matter what it may be. If you are going to RP, in my opinion, you should have been up front about it. There are enough people in SL that would be OK with it, so you could have easily moved on to another when realizing this poor gentleman wasn't.
  2. Faye Feldragonne wrote: Thanks for thus thoughtful response. I really connected with it. I have one new friend, but I'm not good anymore at making friends. Before I became a merchant Ifound friends easier, but after years of being a merchant and holed up in a Sky box working, I've changed. . I have been really hurt by girlfriends in Second life. And one partner. I'm afraid to put myself out there. You gave me a lot to think about. I understand as I tend to get so involved in my own creative process. Fortunately, I do have several friends that insist on chatting with me or spending time doing stuff with them to drag me away. I may sometimes feel a little annoyed because well...I want to finish what I am working on! Hahah! But it always is exactly what I need to make sure my friendships stay strong and remind me of why I fell in love with SL in the first place. I too have had some bad luck with people. It is disappointing to learn someone isn't who you think they are going to be when you start getting to know them. But the same thing can happen in the real world. You just have to pick yourself up, dry the tears and move on and never give up on people. You have to try to trust someone enough to form a friendship and hope it works out and if it does, you may have one of the most amazing friends you otherwise would have never known. That is worth the risk, that is worth everything! Communication through the written word can be so difficult for some of us. I certainly have had my own difficulties with it and have been misunderstood. But you have to try and do the best you can in SL and hopefully the person you are trying to be friends with gets you and understands and they turn out to be a wonderful person. As hard as it may be, I really hope that you can make some friends that are truly there for you and loyal and trustworthy. You just have to be willling to take the risk. There are good women and good men in SL. I know because some of them are MY friends. You will find them. I am sure of it!
  3. I too got burned out. I used to have a very successful rental business I ran for about 3 years. Then I had a heart attack and it became increasingly difficult to log on and be faced with problems or people wanting two hour tours and all the other things that come with running a business. I had to bow out for my own health and healing. I did continue with my furniture store that I had for free on a dear friend's sim and still have today, as well as the Market Place. That didn't require constant babysitting. As I got stronger, I started logging in more and because it is my nature, I really concentrated on my furniture store for awhile. I started creating more and doing hunts, reconnecting with all of my friends, made new ones, etc. Seems like I was always busy again. Then a friend dragged me off to another grid with the promise of free land, and once I checked it out, I fell totally in love with having a whole region I didn't have to pay for to create a fantasy land based on a book I wrote and being able to use my avatar to visit other grids. I love hyperjumping to other worlds and exploring. I also love that in that world, the owner became my friend and encourages all of us there to be friends and support each other in our creativity in developing our fantasies on the land he gives us. But I still love SL so I can't ever really leave it. I keep an apartment and still have my store, but most important are all of my dear friends. I have spent a lot of money on my avatar making her far more beautiful than I ever was in RL and I love the fashion and the clothes. I prefer classy, sophisticated attire. She is me or who I want to be, perhaps. Since Jan 1 this year, I have been in the hospital 3 times 4-5 days at a time each visit. I had my gallbladder removed 3 weeks ago, day surgery, not because of stones, but because of a disease brought on by stress. One of the stays, they did a hydrascan to look at the gallbladder and discovered I have two small anerisms in my spleen that they have decided to look at again in 6 months to see if they grow. They also discoved a tumor in my spine..about inline with my belly button. I see a neurosurgeon in mid March for that to see what needs to happen. It is ironic that since my heart attack two years ago, I have felt better and felt healthier than I have in years until now. I do have high BP and Diabetes, but they are well controlled. Well the BP is now, after they added 2 more meds. So I can relate to having chronic illness. The most important thing for you is to take care of YOU. You obviously love SL, but maybe like others have said, you should take a break from creating for awhile, and instead, connect with others, make new friends, let them support you and be there for you with all you are going through. I know I certainly need a lot of support right now. I am scared to death and I imagine you are too with your own illness. I hope you can get better and be healthy again or at least manage it enough to feel better than you do now. One thing that is certain, we all need love and the human connection to others that can understand and love us through all of our strengths as well as our shortcomings. But when we are sick, that is when we need it the most. Best of luck and healing energy to you!
  4. Well I was excited about it. SL on my tablet? Oh YEAH!! I almost always use my tablet when I am away from home rather than my lap top and being able to access SL with it would be wonderful! But the pricing , a little too steep for my budget so not likely to ever use it. Doesn't cost me anything to just take a laptop along on out of town visits and as far as local excursions, I guess I will just continue using my tablet for the things I currently use it for. I wonder just how successful it will be since to use it, you have to pay for it.
  5. This happened to me before and somehow, the settings had gotten changed. I just had to reset the water back to default (or any other setting you want) and it should solve the problem. Well eventually anyway. It took several times for it to finally take for me. :matte-motes-grin:
  6. The first time I discovered SL was in 2007 and I probably stayed all of ten minutes as I felt very overwhelmed and had no idea what to do or where to go. In 2011 a FB friend had a post about SL so I clicked on it not realizing it was the same thing as in 2007. This time, things just seemed to click for me a little better and somehow I landed at a karoke lounge. By this time I was all of two days old, but still in newbie skin...but I had managed to pick up a lovely dress. Unfortuately, I still walked like a duck whcih must have given me away to the owner as he IM'd me and helped me tremendously by mentoring me. He told me first before we did anything else to go and download Phoenix as he said most people used that and it would be easier for me to use.So I trusted him and downloaded and installed it and logged back on. He then showed me all the bells and whistles, how to adjust settings, etc. He advised me not to accept friendship from everyone who sends an invite as so many guys only wanted one thing. I had already accepted a dozen or so requests for friendship from men and women who never even talked to me cause I thought I would be rude to do otherwise. I was so naive, but thanks to him, I was put on the fast track of learning. He also gave me a 100L cause he said everyone should have money in their pocket. He is still my friend today, though most times we are too busy to chat much. My second real friend was a guy I met in a sandbox the next day when I was opening some boxes I had picked up for free. He is the one who really helped transform my avi as he took me where I could get a decent free AO and skin, as well as clothes. He also taught me how to build. When I got my first parcel, he helped me get it set up and built my first apartment building. He was/is such a good friend. Now I try to help new people and have the opportunity to do so quite often. I know what it is like to be new and confused! ;-) What SL has really done for me though...is give me a life beyond these walls of the real world. I have a lot of health problems, including a heart attack this past Oct that got me 3 stents placed in my heart. I am much better now, but it has been a slow recvovery. The last several years have been hard as I have bad legs and have had bypass surgery on both, as well as a couple of stents in the right one. In SL I can dance like I never will be able to in RL. I can run. I can walk without pain, I can even fly. It also gives me the opportunity to talk to people sometimes. Being isolated so much has made me socially awkward, but with practice, I think I have gotten better at it. I hope so anyway. For someone that is homebound much of the time and doesn't see people much, SL is like a lifeline and helps one not feel so alone. I really hope this new guy can breathe some new life into SL and really come to understand what SL is to so many of us. It isn't a game, but an extention to our lives, a world we can do anything or be anything we want. Where the limitations of the real world has no place.Where we can floursh and thrive as big as our dreams, build amazing places and create wonderous things that are only limited by our imaginations. Long live Second Life and all of its people!.
  7. Welcome to Second Life! Yes, there is a huge learning curve to overcome before you get really comfortable with your avatar and moving about. Practice makes perfect and give yourself plenty of time. As for art, I suggest you explore galleries and museums as the art community is quite large and active in Second Life. It would be a good idea to see what others are doing and what is possible to do. You can put in key words in the search to find art galleries and current exhibits. Gallery openings are a good place to meet other artists, curators, and others interested in art. They usually advertise in groups, so be sure and join as many art groups as you can. To show your work, most curators will want to see a portfolio and a lot will only show certain styles, or only art made in Second Life, or real life, or whatever criteria they have decided is right for their gallery. Visiting various galleries can help give you a feel for the type of art they prefer to show. You can always open your own gallery as well, but getting it off the ground and having people actually visit it can be a challenge. Joining groups can help with that and hopefully you can make art friends willing to help you. Having your own art gallery can be a lot of fun and give you a place to show your work. Good luck to you! I hope you have the greatest success no matter where your path leads!
  8. Sorry you are having such a hard time finding people to talk to and finding places to go. Not every place is adult in nature, and I too would rather not go to places like that, so I understand. You just have to be persistent in looking. The Destination Guide can be helpful in finding places to go. It is true the world can be lonely in some places as there seems to be no one about. One thing you can do is look for newbie friendly places to visit. You can use the key word in search and I think there is actually a tab in the Destination Guide for newbies. These places you will find new people like you as well as more experienced people willing to help and advise you. As pointed out, there is a learning curve you have to get through. We all did. Eventually moving about will become second nature and you will find the places you feel most comfortable and fit in. I said previously that SL isn't a game, but Role Play is pretty popular. Perhaps you will find that you fit in at one of those places. They range from ancient lands to western (like Tombstone) to space age RP and anything you can imagine. I even came across a RP place based on the movie Avatar. I hope you won't completely give up on SL and eventually come to love it as so many of us do and find your niche. Either way, I wish you well.
  9. Welcome to Second Life! As others have said, it is a virtual world. It is your second life and can be modeled after your first life, or be anything else you want it to be. it isn't a game, though some people call it that, but a way to meet people from all across the planet and socialize by chatting. There are numerous music venues you can visit to listen to music and dance, there are art galleries and museums, there is shopping, amusement parks; there are so many different kinds of sims, all waiting for you to explore. In fact, that is the best thing to do to learn what SL is all about, get out and explore! You may eventually even want to get a virtual home that you can use to hang out in with friends, change, etc. Don't be afraid to explore the viewer, but at the same time, be careful you don't change something that messes things up. As a gamer, perhaps it will be a little intuitive for you. You may even want to consider downloading a third party viewer such as Firestorm or Singularity. IMHO, Singularity is one of the easiest viewers to use. Above all, have fun and enjoy your second life!
  10. Just like in real life, you have to pay monthly (or weekly) payments to someone. You can buy land through Linden Lab or a private seller, but you still have to pay monthly fees. There just isn't any way around it. No matter where the home is, it still takes up space on the Lnden Lab servers, and someone has to pay. You can pay them directly or you can pay someone else for the use of their home or land and THEY have to pay Linden lab the tier fees. The only way you will ever have a home in Second life is to pay for it and keep paying for it as long as you have the home/land. It is possible you could have a friend who may give you free rent or free space, but they have to pay for it themselves and would be a very good friend to you in deed! Now if you want affordable housing, I do own rental property with some of the best rates in SL, but I do require payment weekly/biweekly/monthly. You can find me in search: Melody Star Paradise Village. Even if you don't rent, feel free to stop by for a visit and enjoy the amenteties. Good luck to you! Star
  11. iCade wrote: Prices are fantastic, costumer service is fantastic, and it's complete outfits with everything being in world as it is on their vendors. I love that store The prices ARE fantastic and worth it just to get the purses, shoes, and accessories! Thanks for sharing.
  12. I have been working on my avatar since the beginning. There is always better stuff coming out and as designers get more experience, their designs get better as well. I have been in SL for 2 years and recently gave myself a new makeover and purchased a new skin/shape, hair and wardrobe. I really love mesh, so pretty much everything about my avatar is mesh these days. I prefer a sophisticated and stylish look, so I am always looking for good designs in clothing, shoes, and accessories. Accessories are important in pulling a look together, and recently I have been an avid purse/bag hunter to complete my outfits. A good AO is important as well. I had free ones at first, including one that came with the first skin I bought. I finally bought a good one from Vista Animations about a year ago after spending a couple of months looking at them and trying demos. The AO I had before that moved around too much and I was always running into people, as I never stood still. The Vista AO doesn't move around a lot (while standing), which was what I was looking for. A lot of the designers have good group gifts, so I suggest you join groups and take advantage of that. Hush Skins gives away skins all the time, so be sure and check them out. Truth gives away hair sometimes to members. There are so many, it is best just to get out there and explore. Your avatar represents you, and no matter how long it takes, in reality, you will always be working on it. Have fun with it and don't worry about how much time you spend on it. After all, perfection never comes over night! :matte-motes-smile:
  13. I had a simillar issue a few months back. My avatar was stuck at my home and could not TP anywhere. Most times when I would try, I would even crash. My contact lists for friends and groups was blank. Even someone IMing me didn't work, and I could not IM anyone since I had no friends list to pick anyone. I couldn't send a note card either. It was like I was alone in SL. On top of that, my avatar was messed up. I was wearing two hairs, outfits, shoes. I could walk around my own home, but that was all I could do. I tried different viewers, and it was the same in each. I re-installed, and that didn't work either. I cleared cache, the same. I created an alt and everything was fine for the alt. At this point I knew it had to be my account and contacted LL. I had to use the official viewer before they would help me and they pretty much had me do everything i had already done. I sent them screen shots of my messed up avi. I finally convinced them it was not my computer or my Internet since the alt worked just fine. It took them three days and a lot of communication between us, but it was finally fixed. it sounds to me that you are going to have to ask for help as well. Just be sure to use the official viewer and make sure the same things are happening with it. They will only give support to their own...even if it is really an account issue rather than a viewer issue. Good Luck! I hope my post helps.
  14. Sephina Frostbite wrote: Thank you everyone for your kind words. I means a lot to me. Its been hard. I lost my sister and my best friend. StarAlien Thank you for sharing your experience. I dont feel pressure to hurry up and get over it now. Took me a long time to get over my fathers death and some people dont understand the pain they cause when they say, "Youre still sad about it, how long has it been.? Isnt it time to move on?" Unfortunately there will be people that will want to hurry up your grieving proccess. Maybe they have never lost someone close to them before or they don't feel things as deeply. Shrug. In any case, this is YOUR loss, YOUR grief, and no one can tell you how to go about it or how long it should last. This was not only your sister, but your best friend and you feel like a piece of yourself has been torn out. You can't possibly get over that quickly. I don't think people mean to be hurtful or insensitive. They just can't empathize with such a loss. Try to ignore them even though that is so hard when it stings so much. The truth is, you will never get over her loss. Only time will ease your pain and I have to believe that going through the grieving process, no matter how long it takes is far healthier than burying it inside and being in denial. Not only are you grieving the loss of your sister, but the loss of a big part of your life. Nothing is as it was and how you anticipated your life, with her always there, has changed. It will take a lot of adjustments to learn to live your life without her. I know it did me. To this day I still miss my sister and wished she was here. I started to sort of live my life for her...I mean it pushed me to value my own life more and do things I needed to do. Like get out of an unhealthy relationship, go back to school and actually graduate...stuff like that. You have a lot of tears to cry before it feels better, so don't let anyone try to stop your grieving. It will take as long as it takes! (((HUGS)))
  15. Hobo Amusement Park is fun and free. There are tons of rides and other wierd and crazy things to do. The owner is always building new things too. There are donation objects scattered about if you feel so inclined to donate, but it isn't required. I always try to donate though as the entertainment is so worth it. It is always more fun to go with friends. Be sure and check out the scuba diving and the spaceport while you are there. Have fun!
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