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Venera Halsey

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About Venera Halsey

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  1. Thank you for sharing your experience with us and I wish all the good for you and your bf, in both life's. I see things same way as you do and I actually think that most people in SL aren't looking for RL relationships but some still give it a change when they meet right person. Everyone has right to be open or not to be open to RL connection and reason why I started this topic was just to make people think before judging. SL isn't world of roleplayers or world of people who are themselves but world for us all no matter what we are looking for and even when we don't see things same way as someone else it doesn't mean they are wrong and we are right.
  2. I wonder why the OP feels so "judged" by people... I have never really had that experience in sl - oh, I have had people pissed off at me I guess, but I don't take it personally. I don't feel judged. I didn't get pissed off but started to wonder because my experience how people in SL are viewing it seems to be so different from some who have been posting here. So far inworld I haven't heard bad comments about mixing RL and SL but sometimes some people don't like it when I decide not to share my RL info with them. I don't see this as personal thing but interesting one.
  3. I don't think anyone who has spent some time in SL truly believes anything some stranger tells them. Not really different from RL but it is even more important in SL. As long as majority of people seems to be telling truth more than lies (can you ever be really sure about it) and not deceiving when ever they can I don't see any reason why people couldn't be themselves and keep SL as part of RL if they choose so even when there are risks. Life is full of risks anyway. When I feel SL is only roleplay world I either choose to leave or make it purely roleplay for me too. Can't see this happening any time soon.
  4. I have met people that lie and deceive (intentionally) but most people tell the truth and by truth I don't mean their gender, age... but how they view SL. I still believe that most of us want no harm to others. I don't think it is too much to ask that people are truthful about this one small thing that is at the end big thing. And it isn't same as asking others to make their SL to be like you want, it is just small detail about them, SL them. There are always those people who don't care about anyone else and do what they want, lie and deceive, but I sure hope it will never be majority of people in SL.
  5. Yes, profile would be really good tool and people don't use it enough and definetly don't read profiles enough or at least don't take it seriously.
  6. Ishtara Rothschild wrote: It's not wrong and you're free to use SL in any way you like. However, you have to be prepared to meet many people who use SL in an entirely different way, and you cannot expect them to cater to your personal needs. In other words, they might role play an online character that is quite different from their RL persona. Many residents think that the ability to be someone else is the entire point of SL. Lets take this to level where we aren't just thinking if it is wrong or not to look for RL relationship from SL but instead also think if person can expect others to tell the truth when relationship is in the level where two people are talking about their personal views to SL. I don't think SL is mainly for people who want to roleplay so I think everyone has equal right to expect the truth from others about their view to SL to avoid anyone getting hurt when possible. For example A is seeing SL as potential place to find RL friends or partner and B is roleplaying and wants to keep SL and RL completely separate. When relationship between them develops they tell their view to SL to each other and expect other person to be honest about their view too (totally different than asking or telling RL information). If A decides to lie and say they see SL and RL separate too then he/she is lying and I don't think it is ever acceptable. If B decides to lie then he/she is the one lying. Either way I think each and every one of us in SL has equal right to see it as we want and also expect others to openly tell the truth about their view when asked especially when it doesn't mean that people needs to be open about their RL gender, appearance etc. I admit it isn't always so easy to know your view to SL and things can change but I am talking about clear situation when someone decides to tell a lie knowing it is a lie.
  7. Personally I have never actively searched any kind of relationships in SL, not friendships or romantic relationships. Things just happened and I have been open and taken risks but been aware of the risks. So far I have only met friends IRL but it doesnt mean I wouldn't be open to do the same with someone I have stronger feelings for. That would be huge risk and even hoping that to happen would make me vulnerable to get hurt. It would be my risk and if I would get hurt I could only blame myself unless the other person would have given me wrong information about his intentions (or I haven't bothered to ask). Seems to me that so far we all agree that it isn't wrong but it is a huge risk. I am still waiting some people to disagree.
  8. I totally agree with you and most problems I've seen have come from the situations where people didn't tell each other how they take SL and eventually found out they had complitely different view to it. Sometimes reason has been one person telling they see SL one way when they actually see it some other way and that is complitely different story.
  9. I just started to read the Forum again after long break. Lot of interesting conversations, new and bit older but one thing has made me wonder and actually so much that I want to start new topic about it (hoping there hasn't been one lately but I'm sure someone will let me know if there has been). Lot of people are talking about how SL is what ever you make it, it's your world so you can be what you want. Then these same people say it is wrong to try to find or to be open for RL relationships (friend, lover, soulmate...) that start in SL. I don't understand the logic behind this and also I find this being really bad excuse to lie in SL. I have met many people that see SL just as fantasy world, escape etc. and don't want to mix RL to SL in any way. I have met many people that see SL as part of their RL but don't really want to mix both (they are themselves in SL and talk about RL but meeting people from SL in RL isn't what they want and they keep lot of RL things to themselves). I have met many people that see SL as part of their RL and are also ready to extend SL relationships (meaning any kind of relationship, not just partnership)to RL if they meet right people . For some reason I've met more and more people who fall in to that last category so I can't see how it could be wrong and how someone would have right to say all those people are wrong. Maybe SL has already changed or maybe something else. I don't know but I would love to hear what other people think about this. To avoid assumptions I want to clarify that I have friends from all those 3 categories and I have been all of those depending people I interact with and also my RL and SL situation. I have met few people from SL in RL but also I've had partnership that had absolutely nothing to do with my RL (and anything between those).
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