Myrthe Mysterious

April 15

19 hours ago, Arielle Popstar said:

Ok well thank you for responding and my apologies for coming on a bit strong about your intent here. I do think though that taking a SL sabbatical might be helpful especially Opensim as it is very much the same in many ways up to and including the viewer.

For situations like yours and some others who have mentioned having stalkers, it would almost be nice to have a Stalker Vigilante group where you could drop the name of the stalker so that others could maybe give them a taste of their own medicine. Just the threat of it might make some think twice about stalking.

It is ok, I understand how my story looks like, so I cant blame if there are people out there who cant believe it.

It is not something I would ever had believed if it did not happend to me.

Well, I did looked if there where some groups for stalkers, but not found really one, and I was to shy or scared to even tell my story

And I think you are right about taking an SL sabbatical, because it is not much fun now either.

Thanx

April 15

20 hours ago, Dafadilia Wayfarer said:

I'm sorry that you're being harassed in sl with someone who obviously has too much time on their hands. Or so it seems.

Please understand from the outset I'm going to try and be as tactful as possible with what I'm about to say.

I had a stalker in sl for over five years. He was my ex. When we separated I blocked all of his accounts that I knew of and my sl sister blocked him from where we lived. I lived a very active sl since part of my time was helping my rl bestfriend and sl sister run her residential sim as well as volunteering some of my time helping new comers in the spiritual community I'm part of. I'm also an avid roleplayer. My ex knew all of these places that meant everything to my sl and he made sure to cause as much discomfort as possible. He started by creating new accounts and moving them into one of my sister's rentals. He would show up at the new comer area I volunteered at on different new alts and would even try to start roleplaying with me on those alts. Sometimes he would even attempt to flirt and start up a relationship with me only to get frustrated because I wouldn't respond in kind.

After awhile he would let the facade slip and bring up things that only him and I would know about our past together. So the alt would get reported to LL and he would get blocked. LL could only do so much and I knew that so for the longest time I simply tried to deal with the harassment by ignoring him the best I could. I stopped using my two oldest accounts from 2009 and started using a new account. He found out and started harassing me. By this time I had met my current sl and rl hubby. I was getting weary of the harassment so I knew I had to make some hard choices. I started over yet again. First I made Daffy here that I use to post on the forums. A year later I made my regular account I use inworld now. I moved away from my sister's sims. I stopped my volunteer work and roleplay. I was devasted because the experience pretty much alienated me from everything I loved in sl, but it had to be done. For three years I didn't set foot on my sister's sims, I didn't take part in my spiritual community and I didn't roleplay. The harassment stopped.

I've slowly integrated back into the places I loved and missed. Just not on such a large scale as before. I took away his source of fun. Myself. I think he got bored after that and went on his merry way.

The one thing I will say that really concerned me in your post is how you gave this person access to rl. That is not good. Please be careful of the trust you give out to others in both worlds. What you tell them about yourself and your real life as well. Don't give bad people tools to harm you. Whether that is in the physical or psychological. I really hope you find out how this guy is continuously finding and harassing you.

Sorry to hear that you had to endure that. And that one person can destroy the joy for others.

Glad to read that you are enjoying your SL again and I hope there is a time you can enjoy again like you did before.

I know what you mean, I changed maybe 10 times with my account, but I was torn between keep changing and felt like a chicken for hiding away, or If I would confront everything and just keep my main. Then it feels like I see it coming, the thrill is for him to find me over and over. So with my main there is no thrill for him, if it makes sence

That was really a dumb move I made, I really did trusted him. Now I don't even talk about my RL anymore, I learned my lesson the hard way.

Thank you for your anwser

April 15

22 hours ago, Rowan Amore said:

As I mentioned, there are systems that can track IF you allow it. SIN tracker has been around for years as had VGS . if some game also uses this type of tracking, it's still something you opt into. They both also have privacy modes you can turn on to hide.

I dont know any of these 2 trackers, I once tried bloodlines, as cct combat, they dont use those I believe?

April 15

On 4/13/2024 at 10:54 PM, Qie Niangao said:

It may be more practical to stop trying to fight this with escalating technical responses unless this crosses the line into real life stalking. Instead, to repeat my earlier suggestion, let him think he won in the least satisfying way: bore him past the point of interest. This does not mean to abandon whichever account(s) he's already stalking. You need that stalked account more than ever, because you'll use it to make him go away. Keep using it, but make it less and less interesting to stalk. Just mute him or pretend to mute him and do stupider and stupider things with that avatar, make them tedious and incoherent, as if the avatar is being operated by a defective Artificial Intelligence, but a really boring one.

Of course if that were your only account, it would make SL boring for you, too, so make a completely different new account. Don't worry about using the same machine because this new account will be completely different. It's not going to share anything about your previous Second Life experience, nothing your stalker would encounter and nothing they'd be interested in if they did.

There are many different ways to experience Second Life. Your goal is to start this new account doing stuff you'd never consider doing before, with an avatar completely different from any you've used before. Think about what attracted you to your previous avatar: did you like its hair? If so, your new account should have no hair at all. Was your skin a good feature? Fine, switch to scales, or mech hardware. Did it move well with good animations? Nope, the new one should have whatever you can scavenge from old Library avatars. In fact, some weird old Library robot avatar might be a good place to start.

Not the SL you want? Yeah, of course not, but it's a way to investigate parts of SL you'd never experience otherwise, broaden your SL horizons and make some discoveries you can use later, after you've lost this creep. And anyway, meanwhile, you'll need to spend some of your time actively boring him with the stalked account.

(Incidentally, Myrthe, I knew you'd be back because you sound like a grown up, after all this, not easily intimidated by a little Forums skepticism. In fact, you might be especially situated to accept those who are so worried they might be getting tricked, as if that were the worst thing in the world.)

well thats not a bad idea to do. Now im stuck at my home and do not much anymore.

So it doesn't matter how my avatar looks at this point, If I can go out and not only stay in one place.

Atleast I would have some fun again, so I will give it a try for sure and we will see what happens.

And for the boring part, he called me a boring person, I asked him if it makes him happy to get rejected so many times ( this is a while ago, I dont interact with him now)

Im normally not easily intimidated or a scared person at all, if it is RL you can see and know who you are up against. For me it is the person behind a screen you dont really know, and you never really know whit which avatar he is coming this time.I cant fight against someone who knows more about the online possibillities then I do, who is trying to play mindgames and those have effect.

Some time ago I really was messed up about this all, I thought I was going crazy. The things said with different accounts really made me act weird, and confused. Now Im getting at a point I dont really care anymore what others think or say.

Also he showed me he is not the person I met at first, the person I really liked as a person, respected and cared for.

He is a coward behind a screen, who is trying to make others feel just as miserable as he is.

April 15

On 4/13/2024 at 10:42 PM, Kathlen Onyx said:

The only sure way to never talk to him again is make a new avatar. Turn off IM's for anyone not a friend or group and leave your profile empty with no payment info on it. You can always transfers $L to your new avatar from your old one.

You are probably thinking that it isn't fair you have to do all this but if you really have been stalked for 3 years and he keeps finding you then this is the best way to go.

If anyone has experienced or heard of someone going this far to stalk someone in SL I'd love to hear of the experience.

Well I dont mind anymore if it is fair, like it is now it is also not even fun to be in SL either, so it is better to have all that put off.

I jut like to explore and shop and do my own things.

I did read a few stories from others who have experienced this, and even talked with a few about who sadly experienced this

I understand it sounds weird and you cant believe it, and thats fine. I am just glad for you that you never have had this before, and you can enjoy your SL like you wish.

Thank you for your anwser

April 15

On 4/13/2024 at 10:14 PM, UnilWay SpiritWeaver said:

When you got a new machine, did you copy over your applications, settings and data? If so you likely copied over tracking / keylogging / etc software as well.

And that would be how someone would keep tracking you through new machines.

If you know anything about this person in RL, take it to the police. The part I quoted above seems to suggest you two have talked in RL so yes - get police involved.

Computer security wise, if you know anyone in RL who is tech savvy have them look over your machine and your setup. Some of the likely things you will need to do:

Change all passwords using something different from your previous style of making passwords - got to do this while logged out of everything. Might even suggest doing it on a totally different computer at something like a family member's house.

Put your 'data' somewhere like google drive.

reformat your computer.

Install apps all base brand new. Don't copy things over from a backup.

This is where you get a little extreme: grab the data down from google drive on a different KIND of computer. If your computer is a Mac, use a PC, and vice versa. Virus scan it all. Put it on a flash drive, put it back on your machine. Alternatively in future only access that old data through google drive and never download it - but I am not sure how secure this is.

If you have a Mac savvy friend, deleting viruses, malware, etc from Macs is super easy. Cleaning PCs is harder but modern Windows is harder to get infected than modern Mac (it's very easy to put a virus on a Mac machine, and just as easy to remove it. Its very hard to infect Windows now, and just as hard to clean it).

Outside of that... your other thoughts on VPNs etc.

If this person is near you in RL, then you might need to look into some added measures, as far as making sure you don't have airtags or cameras hidden in your home. If any of that is the case - get police involved.

Lastly. my post above: language was not an issue in your post. The words themselves were easy to understand.

But having the entire post on a single line made it visually very hard to read. Looks like your posts after that have formatting though. Maybe that was a forum submit error that removed all the new-lines in the first post.

Thank you for your anwser, I had a mac before and I use a windows laptop now.

As fas as I know I did not copy anything from my mac to my new laptop. Only thing I can think of is my I cloud was the same. could that be it?

And I will ask my neighbour if he will take a look at my laptop, he knows alot about those things you mentioned.

We talked in RL and I know some about him, but he does not live near me. Glad he doesn't

Oo well I did not knew I typed it all on one line, I will watch that if I write a long text again.

April 15

On 4/13/2024 at 9:34 PM, Neremyn said:

IoT - internet of things. Basically smart devices that connect to the Internet. Can be a smart microwave, oven, doorbell, locks, cameras. Usually the cheap chinese devices never get security updates and very often they end up with vulnerabilities which allows to be hacked. It's really a stretch. Resetting the router or getting it replaced is good enough.

Change your passwords and don't use your "main" email as a recovery for the new email.

Ok, thank you I understand it. I will do that, and I will call today with my provider.

I changed my passwords and mu main I don't use for recovery anymore

April 13

43 minutes ago, Neremyn said:

Hi.

Make sure you don't look like anything before, don't use the same tattoos, skins - nothing that can be a resemblance. You would be surprised how often people go for it and don't even realize it. It's also possible that he uses your name to everyone he messages and just fishes for a response.

On the technical site..

You've got a new laptop - good! Now get rid of any IoT devices because they have crap security and could have been compromised - they can be used to gain foothold to your network and pivot further. Reset your router settings to default so any changes he has made are cleared. Standard DNS queries only include domain name but DoH/DoT(DNS over HTTPS/TLS) can include the full URL so if he has set his own DNS server in your router's settings, technically it's possible to find out your new name. For example, you have requested https://my.secondlife.com/myname and he can see "myname"

Another thing in your router is the option to set up a VPN which can act as a man-in-the-middle and allow him to intercept traffic. It's a stretch but still in the realm of possiblities. A reset will clear it. Call your ISP and ask tell if it's safe to reset it(might require configuration afterwards, also change the router's password) or maybe they can just come to replace it.

In the SL's viewer disable streaming music and media and only enable music when you are at some club.

In Media tab disable "play media attached to other avatars" - this can leak your IP address.

I don't think there's anything left you can do on the technical side of things.

Thank you for this anwser, only can you explain to me what a lot device is (im not that technical )

I did not knew all this, and I will reset my router settings for sure, better safe then sorry

I will call them monday to ask if it is safe.

The media I have turned off I read about that on a site "how to avoid redzone" right after that I changed those settings.

Thank you so much I am going to try these things for sure

April 13

51 minutes ago, Rowan Amore said:

From.what others have said in the past on the forums, that is just not possible unless the one being followed is wearing some scripted object given to them. I know that one kidnap RP system might be like.that but it's something you must allow.

I had a scripted object, I deleted it a few weeks ago.

And I changed my settings, so RLV is off and also my media, sounds and voice is off, Is there another setting I should change?

April 13

2 hours ago, Kathlen Onyx said:

I might add that because you have been so descriptive on every single thing he has done and what you have done to combat it he now knows who your current avatar is. If he's smart enough to find you despite you doing totally unnecessary things to stop him, such as buying a new computer, then he is smart enough to know about the Second Life forums. If I were you I'd delete this before he gets wind of it. If it hasn't been 24 hour otherwise you are out of luck.

Then only speak to avatars that you initiate conversations with. Also turn on only receive IM's from friends and groups.

He knows this avatar, and I dont know if he is reading here.

I guess you are right and I should turn on only IM's from friends and groups, I will check if i can find it, thanx for the idea

April 13

2 hours ago, Liaa Nova said:

Sadly there is at least one HUD that allows anyone with it to find anybody, wherever they are in SL. I have no idea if he's using it or if it's SL legal, but it's possible he may have it

No idea I did read about redzone, only that is illegal in SL now

April 13

2 hours ago, Lyric Demina said:

This, then.

If the stalker is STILL finding you? I'm assuming the stalker is still finding you even now, so I will say, please make sure you have treated your son's PC with an anti-spyware service and a general malware blocker.

And in my family, if it were me, I would also make sure it wasn't actually my son or his friends playing pranks on square little old me.

Yeah I will put anti spyware on his pc for sure

No my son is not doing this, he sits with me in my living and is on his pc so I can see what he is doing on it.

But thank you

April 13

4 hours ago, CaitlinParker said:

She has trust issues for starters. The "but(s)" in her answers are possibly proof that she has tried everything she could think of.

Yes, and even if the guy changes his name on any of the accounts, the UUIDs for each remain the same no matter what.

It could be your spelling as I do see hints of Broken English in your writing.

Talking is good, and not lowering your guard is a reactionary response because of what this guy has done to you in terms of cyber stalking. The only person who can decide if you want to be friends with someone is you.

Ah I understans what you mean.

And I do believe that maybe that is what gives it away, my broken english, I did try to change my typing, but thats hard to do.

You are right and I am trying to not distrust everyone I meet

April 13

4 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

Hi again, Myrthe. I suggest not posting anymore. As you can see, the thread has taken a 'victim blaming' turn. I often see this when a problem is unable to be resolved -- certain people begin blaming the victim for their problems. I hope you don't feel the need to defend yourself against this. Just know there are people out there who have encountered this stalking, and they believe you and have empathy for your situation. I"m sorry we couldn't help you find a solution.

Thank you, and I was afraid this would happen, but I am very glad that some people do understand what It means when this happens to them. I really do not like to be in this situation, I wish I could just enjoy my SL in peace without always looking over my shoulder. Sadly not everyone understands this.

But thank you for your kind words

April 13

5 hours ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Sometimes bad experiences are due to unresolved issues resulting from childhood trauma.

Edited to add: See how stupid that sounds?

?

April 13

5 hours ago, Arielle Popstar said:

Well, on the other hand the OP used a typical victim ploy throughout the thread, where every resolution was countered with a "yeah but". That is typically used by those who really don't want an answer that might take away their victimhood legitimacy.

I noted for example she responded to everything except my suggestion about taking a sabbatical from Second Life and going to another virtual game for a while until the perpetrator loses interest and finds a new victim to prey on.

Perpetrators that have such an obsession don't usually go long without finding something new to obsess on.

This might sound harsh but I suspect she really doesn't want an answer.

Sorry I did not responded on your suggestion before, but I used other virtual games before. And I like SL alot, so it is not that I dont want an anwser to my problem.

If I really would want to stay in the victimhood legacy as you think, why would I post it here then?

It is not easy to write these things here, when I finally decided to do this. I really was so tired for trying everything I could think of.

And I hope he finds something new to obsess on, I really do.

It is not fun when you cant go anywhere afraid for getting him in my IM's again.

And I am glad for the people who anwsered and gave options, and yes the most I have tried. and of course I am thinking about the anwsers If I maybe not did it good enough or maybe I forgot something.

So I really am looking for an anwser

April 13

5 hours ago, Kathlen Onyx said:

Call me skeptical but there is no way that IF you did all these things that the person would be able to find you. NOT possible.

1 First post on the forum

2. Saying all the ways they seem to find you? Or all the ways you are trying to find someone and ran out of ideas/options.

3. What better way to find out ways to stalk someone than to post and get ideas from others.

I'm sure I'll get some flack for this but I just don't believe it.

If I wanted to stalk someone like you think, would I post here with my main.

And I hope you never have to experience this, because it really is not fun and it really is not something I would like to spent my time with.

It is almost 3 years now, and I read alot about it here already and tried the most things I did read here before I finally posted it, thats why I thought to ask this here. I was hoping that maybe one person knew something that could help me.

April 13

10 minutes ago, pizza7 said:

it is your reaction to them that keeps it going, my experience, just totally ignore and he will tire of it..can be a while and yes its crazy some people are like that.

i do hope it will get solved eventually.

You are right, at first I got so angry and always responded and he knew I would do that, or which buttons to push to make me nagry. Now I dont care so much anymore. I realize it is someone who gets a kick from griefing other people. So I do ignore them. But if it is an alt I have not seen before I do not know it the moment we talk. when I know it is him I stop the talking and ignore or block him

April 13

6 hours ago, Stephanie Misfit said:

Is there anything you are doing that is consistent, the same all the time across avatars? Like living on a certain parcel of land, going to particular venues, the content of your profiles? The best thing to do is of course to report any behaviour that is against the TOS, but switching things up with what you do and where you go could make it harder for him to find you.

At first I did and there is where he found me the first time, I did not knew so much about all of this. I changed parcels so many times. Mostly I changed every 2 or 3 weeks.

Now I was premium and I had a LH but I changed that, and maybe the content of my typing style in my profile, but tried to change that also with translater.

For almost a year now I dont go anywhere then shopping or staying at my land, but Im sick of that and so im going to other places sometimes now.

Thanx

April 13

7 hours ago, CaitlinParker said:

Only if he knows the name of the router, that you call it as, and the password.

No this is all new

7 hours ago, CaitlinParker said:

I'm guessing he knows her UUIDs and whatever she puts on her profiles and pics.

But you can get someone's UUID from their profile, atleast in FS I know this is possible.

And I am careful what I put in my profile or picks ( pictures only uploaded by the avi Im on) maybe it is my typing style. But I tried to use translater and copy and paste.

7 hours ago, CaitlinParker said:

You've got yourself a new laptop, new modem and router (with a new name and password I hope), and this guy continues to find you in SL despite your VPN software.

You shouldn't need to change the way you look in SL, but you shouldn't have to put up with someone cyber stalking you. Keep reporting him when you're 100% certain that it is him. Yes, it's going to be difficult as this guy has made it extremely difficult for you to trust and make friends online, but you need to take that power from your cyber stalker. Blocking him also works.

You are right, and Im really trying to talk with others, but when they want to friend me, I dont feel good to do that yet.

I know and I use to block now, before I never did. Because it doesn't matter if he comes back with new alts. And he does have many

thanx

April 13

8 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

Are you going to any venue like a live music performance that has a Shoutcast server? These can be used to pick up your IP address. But it would have to be him with access to that Shoutcast AFAIK. Is there any situation that is like this?

I think it's good you are determined to have a Second Life and be rid of this creep. I have a really creepy former tenant who was evicted for putting multiple alts into a one-per-person rental who has stalked me for 4 years and said the craziest, insane stuff, and no amount of abuse reporting cures this so basically I just keep blocking and banning as the alts turn up and go on my way. The best thing to do with griefers is log off, don't engage with them, even 10 minutes will help break the vicious circle.

No, not anymore. After I read alot about those things I enabled my media and sound and voice, just to be sure.

Yes the most insane stuff, but especially he kept saying stuff he knew I was insecure about. And not one time but so many times, It really was a mindgame for him.

I only got more insecure and felt terrible but he used it all by now, so It does not hurt me anymore like before, it makes me stronger now, and so I do log off or I walk away from my laptop for a while.

Oh wow, 4 years thats a long time. Glad you got rid of him.

Thank you

April 13

13 hours ago, Lindal Kidd said:

You don't need to do that. Things in your inventory cannot do anything bad to you; they have to be rezzed in world or worn.

I don't know what other advice I can give. You seem to have changed all your hardware, your ISP, and your IP address (via a VPN). Hmmm...have you really changed ALL your hardware? I mean, maybe he could've installed something on another device in your local network that keeps infecting your PC. That's way over my knowledge level.

Ok, that is good to know, but I already removed it all, well it cleans my inventory

Well not everything, not the PC and PS4 from my son, so I hope it is not that.

April 13

15 hours ago, WereBeast Alpha said:

if the modem id and password is the same probably.

No, I have changed those also

April 13

17 hours ago, Bree Giffen said:

I don't know the specifics of what is happening but perhaps you can create a poison pill by uploading unattractive pictures of someone else to your profile and pass it off as yourself. Not wildly unattractive but just enough to make the stalker think it's no longer worth it. Another method would be to create a honeypot avatar that gets all of the attention from your stalker while you have a second true avatar that exists separately. Then keep both logged in at the same time.

These suggestions may be extreme but it seems you have tried everything else.

Well that could be an idea, but I dont put pictures in my profile. And with the avatars I tried that also, I have created 10 accounts by now, and deleted the most again.

Thank you

April 13

17 hours ago, Lyric Demina said:

I hope you live in a place where you have choices and options for internet service providers. One time, I switched EVERYTHING -- service provider, modem, router, computer, cables, EVERYTHING. I fixed the problem that I was having and it was very good after. Maybe that is an option for you, sometime?

I hope you find a good solution and you are able to enjoy your first and second lives again.

Yes I do, and I already did that. I changed everything. The new provider changes everything even the cables.

Thank you

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