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Posts posted by JaedenDelanaire

  1. Do the least harm possible. 

    And keep in mind that it's not just your RL partner that is potentially affected, but your SL partner as well. Feelings will occur on both ends and even if your RL partner doesn't give two flying *****s what you do in a virtual reality world, you may very well end up causing your SL partner more harm than joy, especially if your RL partner changes their mind. 

    There really isn't anything any of us can say to you, for that very reason, unless of course you want to massively over share to online strangers. Just consider all parties involved and do the least harm. 

    • Like 2
    • Thanks 1
  2. 14 minutes ago, Syo Emerald said:

    I'm refering to the way you mentioned the creation of mesh clothes as a "3 hour blender product", as if it was easy and somehow a disgrace to compare it in any shape or form to the service the OP is offering. Other than that I'm just telling you that she was in no way objectivied, just because her service is treated and talked about the same way any product would be.

    Those are a lot of implied words that I never wrote. I'm sorry that I hurt you. I really, and sincerely am. I bet you put your entire heart, soul, and energy into your sewing patterns, and that they are absolutely a product of love to the highest degree. And that, in itself, is every bit as intelligent, graceful, and wondrous as being able to explore another human and the intricacies of sexuality. And while I imagine it probably takes you closer to 10-16 hours to finish a physical garment, that it probably took you a week+ when you were first beginning, and that time and effort is completely priceless. 

    Definitively, my position is that sexual services are a product comparable to that, and that sexual services do not objectify the provider, freely given or in exchange for monetary value. But in the context of how Drake was framing their contentions about her price point, it felt... less than polite. I used the wrong word, but essentially it felt like they were belittling the amount of effort, energy, and creativity that sex work requires. A well made $3 mesh once made is made, and it's out in the world for consumption for at least 2-4 years before becoming outdated, and is a constant potential source of revenue with upkeep, and it seemed at the time a poor comparison to sex work which is an individual experience each time, and the formula constantly has to change to keep the potential revenue per customer. Basically, it was a comparison of mass production vs. custom order, which is--blah blah blah, ramble ramble ramble, I am sorry I used that word, I am certain each and every single mesh garment is made with the same love-creation-energy.



    1 hour ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

    And she most certainly did say "gifts plus lindens." 


    My bad.

    1 hour ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

    Where did you see anything about RL community experience? 

    In a different thread that you've involved yourself in that's related to the subject of asking references. It's in this same subforum. 

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  3. On 11/15/2018 at 8:37 PM, FollyToBeWise said:

    My question is, in the real life community it's appropriate to ask for references and I was wondering if other players do that? I would like to start asking for them, though my vetting process *does* weed out those entitled people, hearing from people who have played with them might offer... perceptive. 

    I fear for people who are new to the scene - many could take advantage of lack of knowledge and sub or dom frenzy. ?

    Thank you,


    I would just do it. At best, they enjoy seeing you informed and cautious enough to ask for references. At worst, you have to explain why having references happens to be important to you in an online setting. I've personally never thought of it, but usually if I'm excited enough about someone as a top or bottom, they meet all of my friends anyways. I guess that's kind of like giving references?

    Vultures will always be out there and excited bottoms make easy targets. Bu hell. You could see it as kind of a service. Make it trendy to ask for references among people you know. Make fetch happen!


    • Like 2
  4. Why are you comparing a real person's sexual and emotional involvement to a 3 hour blender product? You're objectifying her without even paying or asking for consent. Rude. 

    She's not asking for plus gifts, she's asking for ballpark 20k L and is willing negotiate lower. Half the price of cam models? Sounds about right from what I've seen. Especially after seeing her in game picks. 

    If you don't understand the value of industry workers for your personal life, that's okay, dude. But she's a 7 month avatar and has indicated RL community experience with a vetting process. Perhaps if you're interested you could ask her for advice for your own vetting process. 

    And sure? Try out being an in game industry worker. It's fun.


    • Thanks 1
  5. A friend that I found by chance through RP.   Real life feelings got tangled the closer we became OOC. Eventually contact was cut due to the way it was affecting us, and stupid things I did. Still miss her four years later; she touched my life in such a wonderful way, and I still harbor those happy hopes that maybe we can just be good pals at the long end of the road. 

    • Like 1
  6. FollyToBeWise sort of sold herself short. I know it's popular to heckle industry workers, but just to put it into perspective, 20,000 L / $80 a week is way on the low end for what you would expect to pay for personalized attention. If she averaged spending one hour a day per week with you, you're paying her a little over $10 an hour. People outside of SL that offer the same level of contact--basically through e-mail, text, or chat, without voice or cam--could probably get away with charging something like $50 an hour.

    • Like 1
    • Haha 1
  7. So... 

    I guess I'm just an anomaly because 90% of my SL friends that are women RL primarily use male avatars in game. Including the one that introduced me to the SL world to begin with. And with at least two of them, I would have never in a million years guessed until we all got on voice chat one night. Best thing? It really helped me identify just exactly how fluid my sexuality, and just how much gender appearance can affect perception of personality and attraction. 

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  8. I must have had signatures turned off, as well!  But going to Cindy's profile is how I figured out what her store is. Kix Erotica.  Good stuff in there, I especially like the lesbian pallet sofa, that particular loft chic style, but the bdsm furnuture didn't match the subtle style I'm going for. 

  9. Hi friends!

    I'm looking to build up a bit of a private dungeon for myself, but it feels like the same things that were made 5-6 years ago are still in circulation today. Granted, I've been gone for 4 years, but I was hoping by at this point that there would be something else out there other than BH and Dutchie. So far the 'newest' and most elegant of my discoveries have been Stockholm and Lima, but their animations appear a bit dated, too. 


    Any recommendations for places to check out? 

  10. 4 hours ago, Donna Underall said:

    I've so lucky to have my sister for almost the whole time I have been in SL.  We are sisters enough that while some people come and go in SL, we stay sisters even when one of us has to take a break from SL.  I love her to death and I know she loves me too!   I know we would stay sisters now even if SL went away.  


    I feel you big time. Transcendant relationships like that is what I feel mmos and typical networking platforms is all about. Two of the coolest cats I know are still loose friends with me through FB even though they stopped playing regularly around advent mesh. And it's such a great friendship because we can literally go without months of talking, and then all the sudden reconnect as though time never passed. But when all three of us played we were i n s e p a r a b l e. 

    • Like 1
  11. 10 hours ago, Talligurl said:

    A SL sister is the one thing i have wanted but has never seemed to work out, only problems are, I do not have a lot of time to devote to SL, and while I am quite capable  of  discussing off-shoot theology, you might not like my very conservative Presbyterian ideas. 

    Heck, I might love them!  I'll shoot you an IM in world. Real life happens and my free time is occasionally sparse, too. And honestly if I like talking to a person their lack of availability just makes me that more eager to talk to them next time they're on.

    • Like 1
  12. Hi friends! 

    I'm a returning player. It's been either four or five years since the last time I logged in with any consistency, and I am having a blast with the new bento update... but I'm feeling rather lonely through it all. I'd like a friend to be able to go out on adventures with! To go dancing with in the middle of the night, to giggle-snort in snobbish manner over ridiculous shapes we come across, to fearlessly jump on each and every pose ball we come across, go on freebie hunts, build and discuss all the frustrations of avatar building, and to find those gorgeous photography sims that tickle a sense of whimsy and fantasy. Basically, someone I can drag around with me, and who would also have the time, inclination, and interest in being pulled around the sim grid to fulfill my sense of wanderlust.

    Or, as it would seem the terminology is here... a sister of sorts, I suppose?! A mother?! I'm so confused about the loose family dynamics! And yes, I have a preference toward women, because what I long for is a sisterhood (or motherhood?) feeling. Sorry, dudes! I would bore most of you, anyways. 

    Toss me a message in game or send a notecard. Whichever floats the boat. 
    If you'd like to know a little about me, read on! 

    I'm a 30-something Canadian florist, married IRL to the dude of my dreams, and I have a cranky old man cat who doubles as my precious baby when he's being affectionate. I was dicking around with Second Life back in 2007 or so, but never really got into it until around 2011. I'm bi and asexual, but a heavy romantic. RP is my main hobby and, of course, I would be one happy clam to find a reliable RP partner. Outside of that, I watercolor and watch other people arrange flowers on youtube for work inspiration and motivation. 

    I was raised a mormon, and while I'm currenly inactive, mormons, scientology, and other peculiar off-shoot theologies are my favorite things to converse and obsess about. Meditation, new age magic practice, Crowley, Eckhart, Watt, Sadhguru, mysticism schools--all of these things excite me. Other topics I can get chatty over include veganism, nutrition and diet, and BDSM. 


    Edit: If you're wondering what I mean by platonic romance buddy, don't worry! I am not entirely certain what I mean, myself. Essentially, be the Diana Barry to my Anne. 

    • Like 2
  13. Hello!

    Many of my mesh outfits were bought in 2013, and I've taken a hiatus since. I don't recall having this problem 2 years ago. But the issue has happened on objects of different creators. Well known creators; Teefy, Secret Garden, and other creators that are featured at Collabor88--in fact, seviral of these dresses were Collabor88 purchases.

    In relatively static poses the dresses are fine. When I walk, or when the poses have more active leg work, the part of my leg that does not have an alpha layer shows right through. The problem isn't fixed by putting more alpha layer in, as the leg's position moving outside the mesh's structure is the issue. This problem occurs on both maitreya mesh avatar and the SL standard avatar.

    Has something changed in the way mesh bones to the legs in the last two years? Is this an issue with current clothing? Should I be asking the object creators for a hopefully more updated version of the clothing that has boning that adheres to the present SL skeleton?

    The issue occurs on both Firestorm and Singularity, I have not yet tried the standard SL viewer yet. Any suggestions or people mentioning their own issue with old mesh outfits would be comforting. Any information, really. Thank you in advanced!
  14. My alts have never been anything more than an extension of myself, but on the occasion that I control a gender other than my own IRL, friends have noted that I behave differently. Different suits tend to call for different mannerisms. One alt has a feminine name and holds all of my female skins, animations, AOs, etc., and the other is male, holding the gender opposite to my other. I use them for RPing, and both of them represent a plethora of characters--all I have to do is change skin, shape, hair and outfit and use a different titler and BAM, I'm in business. 


  15. Madelaine McMasters wrote:

    JaedenDelanaire wrote:

    Tari Landar wrote:

    Oh I get that everyone isn't necessarily gifted in that area. Using another's emotes won't make you any less so, however. Quite the opposite actually. . .

    I actually disagree! :matte-motes-big-grin: But only in a certain context. Part of the reason why I can emote half as well as I do now is because I've copy-pasted erotic RPs I've had chance to witness into saved notepad files, or any emotes I happen to witness in passing that have made me go, "Wow, that's a good writer." I've used the files to study their sentence structures and why they're appealing to read. Good sentence structures are things that SHOULD be learned, and there's no better way to learn than to play copy-cat with the structure while switching out descriptive words and actions to taper to your scene.

    Ack, I certainly don't think sentence structure is what makes good writing. Maybe I'm just trying to hold out hope for myself, but I believe good writing doesn't require it, and goes well beyond it.

    I've seen this same copy/edit technique used in the creation of many things, and I do my best to avoid it. If I'm trying to build an idea or feeling in your head (which is what good writing is all about), I don't want to be restricted by someone else's scaffolding, no matter how neat I think it looks. The time I'd spend trying to wrench the scaffolding around a corner would be better spent constructing one from scratch, using my own tools and judgment.

    The best way to become a good writer is simply to... write.

    I don't disagree with you. There are many ways people get into creative writing, and for me the copy/edit technique worked. I still do it here and there when I see people choosing a laconic and yet well written style, in hopes that one day I may ditch my tendency to purple-pose. It's never been about adhering to a cookie-cutter molder for me; I simply just need to write like another person for a little bit until I get used to the style and from there on I experiment freely, wildly, and without restraint or need to glance back at my 'cheat sheets'. In my opinion, it's no different from an artist who uses a model to help learn the human shape until the proprtions are so well learned that they no longer need a model for regular sketches involving placid settings.


  16. LaskyaClaren wrote:

    JaedenDelanaire wrote:

    if someone doesn't know how to scene erotically, chances are they're too young / inexperienced to be scening adult related matters, period
    . .

    Not necessarily so. The odds are better that they are simply gawd awful writers, or that they lack any sexual imagination (the "wham-bang-thank-you-mam school of sexuality). 

    There are enough of both in RL; it's hardly surprising to find them in SL too.

    Both reasons have good odds, but I still tend to think that anyone who flat out can't as opposed to just shoddy wham-bam-thank-you funk is probably underaged. Or just terribly inexperienced. Either way, they have no business being hired at an escort house. :matte-motes-big-grin:


  17. Tari Landar wrote:

    Oh I get that everyone isn't necessarily gifted in that area. Using another's emotes won't make you any less so, however. Quite the opposite actually. . .

    I actually disagree! :matte-motes-big-grin: But only in a certain context. Part of the reason why I can emote half as well as I do now is because I've copy-pasted erotic RPs I've had chance to witness into saved notepad files, or any emotes I happen to witness in passing that have made me go, "Wow, that's a good writer." I've used the files to study their sentence structures and why they're appealing to read. Good sentence structures are things that SHOULD be learned, and there's no better way to learn than to play copy-cat with the structure while switching out descriptive words and actions to taper to your scene. I agree it's important not to carbon copy, and it's important to learn how to wield language rather than to flop lazily with wooden swords (read: ripped emotes from others), but sometimes it's helpful to run with what works first before running off the deep edge and experimenting.

    However, if the reason OP wants pre-made dialogue is because she wants to spread them amongst her staff members, then I'm part of Team: Make Your Own. That is not good business practice, and you have no business hiring individuals who cannot scene erotically; there's too many talented ladies out there who would gladly receive lindens for the melt-your-computer smut they can spew from their fingertips. Moreover, I happen to agree with wdwalker--if someone doesn't know how to scene erotically, chances are they're too young / inexperienced to be scening adult related matters, period. The canned emotes I've witnessed from various HUDs are terribad. Awful. Disgraceful. To borrow Tari's words, laughable. They truly are souless and I wouldn't recommend them to dogs.

  18. Some people have difficulty creating their own. :matte-motes-bored: Not everyone is gifted with sexting prowess. I remember some few years ago, at the ripe age of twenty-three, I was still looking up guides and hints on how to send raunchy texts to the boyfriend. I would have given anything for a pre-made, sure-to-work dialogue that didn't sound like it was ripped from a cheesy 80's porno, and frankly, I still lack the ability to send him raunchy texts.

    That said, everything takes practice and eventually you'll throw together several sentences that will sound appealing to most of the male t-rex population of SL. Read some steamy novels. Like a particular line? Use it. Read some blogs on how to 'talk dirty'--see any examples you like? Use them. Practice, practice, practice! 


  19. The landscaping is rather garish. The glow / bright pink trees with similarly bright yellow grass doesn't doesn't really work the dark deep blues and teal structures. The cheap stone walls blocking every parcel off are just that--cheap. Creative landscaping can block effectively as fake walls, and using land structure and actual mountain / cliff edges would work better. You wouldn't go wrong by buying some landform structures from studio-skye and fantastik

    That said, all if it can and does work on particular windlight settings. If you visit the estates make sure you play with your settings before you decide whether or not you want to take it or leave it. The place looks pretty spectacular on some of the sunset settins.

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