Here's every event ad you ever saw for live performers

[KongWubba]

More or less:

 

"(name) has been performing for 50 yrs, since the day she was conceived.  She has been performing professionally since she was 2 weeks old and is so amazingly smooth yet really powerful and amazing in every way and makes people like Ella Fittzgerald and Judy Garland sound like total hacks and will make you cry tears of joy.  Her influences are everything and she sings every genre you ever heard of and 16 you haven't.  She also plays 23 instruments better than anyone ever has in the history of the world and is so fun to talk to you will want to marry her even if you're a heterosexual female."

Then you go to the show and..............well you know the rest.

Glad there's no hyperbole on SL.  God bless click bait.  lol

 

 

[Pamela Galli]

You forgot the all caps and special fonts and characters.