Thank you to everyone who replied - it has helped!
I was here back in Beta days (with a different avie), left and returned several times. I do miss those days when we creative people could spend way too much time subtley adjusting our own skin features - that was fun. But as I understand it now, that is no longer possible, and you must get a skin to look "professional." I can do that!
When I returned this last time, I used the avie I had back then, hence my inability to change what I wanted the most. I dug out a new and improved model that already had the bald cap on, so I am quite happy with her.
Thanks for all your input!