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Zeta Zemach

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Everything posted by Zeta Zemach

  1. Amethyst Jetaime wrote: Zeta Zemach wrote: When I posted the picture of the fairy -it was meant as a general comment on the stereotypes of female avatars. Apparently SL is not the right place to discuss gender roles or gender stereotypes -I got it. However I'm still allowed to voice my opinion on this issue. As for the Adult content -I've been to a club a couple of times -this is not what this debate is about. Can we move on please? Given that female avatars are created by their owners and engage in the behaviors that they do voluntarily, you can't draw any conclusion about stereotyping females in SL. Stereotyping is about generalizing particular characteristics of one in a class to everyone in the class. That is not what is going on in SL. The only thing going on in SL is that given the choice many people want to look a certain way and some, but not all, act out their darker fantasies. If a woman could ONLY choose to look sexy, than that would be stereotyping. But that isn't the case. You can look any way you choose to look. If you want to create an avatar that is fat and homely, that is your choice and if anyone has a problem with it, it is their problem not yours. And this is what I find interesting: when people can choose any shape or outfit they want -the majority will most likely choose gender stereotypes. I'm not accusing anyone -I'm just wondering why You are allowed to voice your opinion all you'd like as long as you understand that everyone who replies to your post also has that right. You are makinjg the common mistake some posters make that when the majority of people disagree with you they are suppressing your opinion and go off in a huff. No -I'm still here and I'm not going anywhere. Of course the majority in SL disagrees with me, this is no surprise to me. I do have friends in SL who shares my opinion. Apparently my opinion really seems to rub your feathers.
  2. Amethyst Jetaime wrote: First the picture of the fairy is not anything like the other two. I see more flesh on a typical summer day at the pool. When Disney created Tinkerbell in 1953 they put her in a strapless mini dress. Very risqué for that time period. Animator Marc Davis' personification of her as a winged pixie with a very womanly figure was widely criticized as too sexually suggestive by Barrie purists, especially after it was rumored that she was modeled after actress Marilyn Monroe. Here is one of the original animation cells. Note the bare back, and not exactly "modest" pose. While there is a lot of things in SL that I personally find offensive, it is not up to me to interfere with what two consenting adults choose to do. SL is about the freedom to be who you want to be. If on segment all of the sudden gets censored, its a slippery slope that could lead to the total grid being G rated because there is always someone that will be offended by something. I also don't understand your statement about having to have Adult content turned on because of club events. The fact that you go to Adult clubs but are offended by adult content doesn't make much sense to me, or is it that only the Adult content that YOU enjoy should be allowed? When I posted the picture of the fairy -it was meant as a general comment on the stereotypes of female avatars. Apparently SL is not the right place to discuss gender roles or gender stereotypes -I got it. However I'm still allowed to voice my opinion on this issue. As for the Adult content -I've been to a club a couple of times -this is not what this debate is about. Can we move on please?
  3. Drake1 Nightfire wrote: Zeta Zemach wrote: I knew that I would get these kind of angry reactions. So, why did you post it? Ah yes, just like the rest of your posts.. to get attention. Uhmm yes -you're absolutely right...that's it. I'm craving for attention
  4. I knew that I would get these kind of angry reactions. My point is that female bodyimage in SL in general is stereotyped and gives the impression that: (and I'm repeating myself) women are always avaible, cute and sexy. I don't mind people looking sexy -and I don't think avatars should dress like amish, this is NOT my point. -what I'm looking for is diversity. It's almost like sexiness is the norm in SL -Occasionally I'm contacted by men who wants to offer me a more sexy avatar. As for having A rated content turned on -it gives me the opportunity to participate in events or go to clubs. Besides that I don't explore A-rated sims. However seeing these images has definitely made me change my mind.
  5. What makes me angry is the underlying message: that women are always cute, sexy and horny -and even rapable. I'm perfectectly aware that this is roleplay, but it doesn't make me less appalled -does it have to be on the welcome screen? I'm reacting against the general perception of women in SL, but hey sex sells.
  6. These are the first images I saw when I opened Second Life today. It makes me sad and -yes angry. Is this really the image Second Life wants?
  7. To some extend I think the western world has become more sexualized -young women are unhappy with their (normal) breastsize and body hair seems to have mystically dissapeared from the surface of the earth. I think the easy access to online pornography has changed young peoples body image. I'm not going to lecture here -I don't think it's all black and white. 50 years ago women were categorized as stereotypes -being either a Jackie or a Marylin. Today, young people switch identities and explore their sexuality. There is (in the western world) a new openess towards sexuality and our perception of genders -personally I think it's a positive development. Having said that, I often find the gender roles in Second Life stereotyped and often oversexualized -this goes for male avi's too. It's a free world and people are entitled to dress up or down as they wish, we still have to treat each other with respect.
  8. I'm sorry -but that is the most silly argument I have heard for a really long time. I'm not even sure why I bother react to this... I remember when I was a young woman -Being pretty, I got hit on quite often and most of the time I found it annoying and exhausting. I have also been exposed to sexual harassment from coworkers several times -even when I dressed in comely clothes. So what is your point? That a woman who wears a dress has to put up with sexual harassment?According to you -young women should wear a burka if they don't want to be hit on? Really?
  9. Bly me, Freud knew about SL? :smileywink: Thank you all, for your interesting replies to this topic!! I started this thread months ago because I was frustrated with SL-it made me depressed and I was about to leave for good. When I originally came to SL (6 years ago), it was a place to explore virtual worlds and share knowledge - and a place to hang out with your friends. I left SL after a few months and 4 years later I returned. It seemed that the "clientele" had completely changed. My avatar doesn't look sexually provocative -and yet I constantly got IMs from creepy, silent guys (with empty profiles) who obviously had one agenda only: slex. They didn't care about who I was -to them I was just another object to rub against. I haven't changed my views on SL but I've learned to avoid certain types of people and places -and I've found that there are nice, generous, interesting, creative, empathic people here too. Does SL in general attract sex-addicts with low empathy and bad communication skills? Yes I think so, but I've learned how to avoid them -more or less...
  10. Czari Zenovka wrote: Quinn Lysette wrote: but she must understand im a wierdo and a pervert i need a girl to hang out with an do stuff wierd stuff perverted stuff u know fun stuff That pretty much covers the requirements of most every guy I've met - and waved bye to - in SL. LOL Spot on! Bye bye Quinn
  11. Kaitlin Fray wrote: Hey Sakinan, Its not you, its simply that most people on SL seem unable to have a proper conversation lol. I can probably count on the fingers of one hand the very few people I've come across that make conversation easy like it's meant to be. It's not just me then? LOL. Most people (read: men) I meet in SL are not interested in conversation or they are not able to put whole sentences together -besides "How old R U?". Why is that? And what are they doing in SL -except from the pixel action-thing? I'm just puzzled.
  12. Alicia Sautereau wrote: ---------------- That`s why i don`t bother with public places and some times, i wonder if the general male population is dumber then a donkey`s arse and tp out a little bit ashamed of them being the same gender and all i can do is shake my head in RL and think "wtf was that?!" Sad but true...
  13. I know I'm going to offend someone when I say this: I have never in my entire life met so many hopeless men as I have in the one year I have been in SL...Shape up guys! They are rude, antisocial and sexistic, and most of them only care about one thing: SLEX!. I just met a guy who wanted to give me an avi with bigger breasts! Yep that is the interlectual level of SL men. I'm seriously thinking about leaving SL for good. I really hope you will meet a nice, descent and smart guy in SL, but please don't get your hopes up too high. The chances you will find him in RL are so much bigger.
  14. I believe that many women in particular can recognize your experiences in SL. I've been here for about a year and find it extremely hard to find friends -or even people who wants to have a conversation. Most of the men I meet are looking for slex and most of the women are looking for a partner. Another thing I've noticed is that a lot of people -especially the men in SL are socially handicapped -they don't know how to behave with other people. I have met a few nice people but they often leave SL within a short amount of time. I wish I could give you a good advice, -just keep saying hi to people and maybe one day someone will greet you back -And avoid the silent types with empty profiles Good luck Regards Zeta
  15. SL can be a pretty lonely place. I would suggest that you for a start write something in your profile that gives people a hint of who you are...Wish you the best
  16. Moonie Ghanduhar wrote: Most poeple who are new here use is as an excuse to make other people hate this game.. but no its not true... Im a manager,dj,model and a photographer in this game , i have many friends... but yes... sometimes i like havin fun too ... but its not all about sex =) Umm, why would they do that? I'm merely expressing my frustration being a female avatar in SL I don't think I'm the only one. I have been asked for slex in sims where slex wasn't allowed, and I have often been defriended when men found out that I was serious about not having slex or relationships. I got to the point where I started to mistrust all men in SL. A couple of months ago I changed my profile to be even more specific about slex and relationships, and the interesting thing is that people practically never contact me any more. It seems to be either you are open to slex or you don't have a social life in SL. Thats my experience anyway, I hope I'm wrong because I really find SL to be an interesting place.
  17. @Tarina: Sure, If you look overly sexy on your profile photo sooner or later you will be contacted by creepy guys. However this wasn't the case. I''m nice looking. More Meryl Streep-ish than Pamela Anderson -actually I have never had a cleavage LOL. Being pretty is not an invitation for sex. I have had my share of sexual harassment during my RL career. I learned very quickly not to smile to much, not to flirt and to dress down. I always try to look my best wether I'm going to a business meeting or seing friends. What I'm trying to say is that as a woman you always have to find that balance between looking your best and being sexy. I think that women should be allowed to be beautiful in RL and SL without constantly being hit on or asked for sex.
  18. @Rybus Zuhal: I dont think you have to feel superior or more succesful because you dont find SLex in particularly interesting. However I cant help thinking that Slex, SL marriages and virtual babies are weird -I think most people do. But I respect other peoples right to want these things. However there is nothing wrong in wishing there were more interllectual activities in Sl -and less Slex.
  19. @Dana: It didn't take a long time for me to realize that I had to be very specific in my profile. But rewriting my profile didn't hold the guys back. As for my portrait : yes I was naive -I had no idea that having my RL portrait on my profile was an invitation. And yes I found out that SL is over flooded with weirdos. Live and learn. I don't think that there was anything in my behavior that led men on. I have always been told that my flirting-skills are terrible -but I guess people see what they want to see... But I do ask myself wether I really want to be in a place where I constantly have to be on guard and question peoples motives...
  20. @jwenting: You prove my point -maybe SL is developing into a sex playground and the users who aren't interested in slex (or a partner) feels alienated and finally leaves SL. At least thats my own experience. It's kind of an opposite world.
  21. @Thanks Hippie: I might accept your generous offer -I just need a little more time in my life @Tari: I agree -However I have tried to find sims that match my RL interests -and there were no one there LOL. People seems to gather in sims that has a romantic or sexual concept. I think this is an interesting debate -and definitely not a new subject. From the comments I got I see there are different perspectives on the matter My whole point is to question wether the contact you have with people in SL, eventually is expected to end up in relationships and/or slex. Personally I would like to think that life (and SL) is more than that -call me a bore/prude and hunt me down... I honestly don't care. I have male friends in RL and that works for me, but in SL its much more complicated. I have met quite a few men in SL who gets obssesive after talking to them once or twice -and they get offended if I talk to another man or doesnt IM them as soon as I am online. Well, sometimes a conversation is just a conversation. It doesn't have to lead to anything more -just like in RL.
  22. @Tracy: I have to say that I was quite naive in the beginning, but after a while I developed a thicker skin. Apparently some people act like jerks because they can hide behind an avatar and will never be held responsible for their behavior. They are just small-minded people who has nothing better to do -sorry if I sound harsh, but I have met a lot of jerks in SL Don't get me started on needy desperate men...
  23. Thank you all, for great answers. It seems there is more to SL than sex I will continue to look for the right places or even start to build myself -as some of you suggests. Ametyst@: I'm not saying that SL sex is bad -it's just not for everyone, and in my experience a very big part of SL is about sex. Maybe I have been to the wrong places or been with the wrong people. But even no-sex sims seems to be pick-up places. The reason why I wrote this post was that I realized that SL created more frustrations than Joy, and I was fed up with people asking for my friendship for the all the wrong reasons. I started to mistrust people. I actually had to remove my real-life portrait because people only commented on this, instead of reading my profile. It's also my experience that people doesn't bother to talk to me when they realize there isn't any possibility for sex or romance. Dont get me wrong, I think SL is a great place and I have met interesting and kind people
  24. I have been in Seoond Life for about a year now (actually I have been there for 5 years, but I had a 4 year break and came back about a year ago) and it gets more and more clear to me that Second Life primarily is about sex and partnerships, and I often find the gender roles to be overly sexy and overly romantic. I know I'm stepping on somebodys toes here :( Im not interested in neither and for that reason I'm wondering if there is any future for me in SL. What I found was a lot of needy men who would defriend me as soon as they realized that I was serious about not having sex or relationships. I'm in SL because I'm interested in virtual worlds and I like to talk to people from all over the world What do you think? Does it make any sense to be in SL if you dont want to have sex or doesn't believe in SL relationsships??
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