Gopi Passiflora

Decided to shamelessly bump this topic since the big day is almost near. Here's a picture of my decor from last year (they are still up but I added a few things this year.)

Some Halloween decor.

My younger witch character as she was last year (and is still like this). Also a work in progress.

My custom Vampire character. Work in progress.

I read the thread and your responses. I agree with some of your ideas and I appreciate all what you have said to me. I agree with the ideas that men may be more activity-oriented and that men prefer one-on-one relationships. I can see myself (a man IRL) being more activity-oriented (in RL, I mostly like bonding with fellow men at video game conferences for example.) I also see myself as one-on-one type person (sometimes I'm a "third wheel" with more than two people.) As @Love Zhaoying also said, I agree I should be less passive if I want friendships. But again, I must also be careful not to make generalizations like I did in my OP, like some of you have warned. I apologize yet again, I was rash when I made this topic.

(Might be yet another incoherent train of thought. I'll try to summarize what I said at the end. I understand some of you may not accept my apology, but please understand that this topic involves gender again. The thought just came to my head.) So I was in Social Island 10, as one of my man characters. (He's a classic avatar dressed as a cook, I can provide a picture upon request.) I was idling around near a group of women, not doing anything in particular, not even interacting with the women. A man teleports in and greets them in local with a "hi". At first, none of the women respond, so I took some initiative and say "hi (man's name)". He responds with a quip about my outfit: "I'd like a martini please". I'm not really bothered and I like his acknowledgment, so I play along according to my character's backstory. But he still persists on greeting the women, this time by their names, and then ignores what I said. While the women do eventually respond and have a brief genuine conversation, I got the feeling in this particular instance, he seemed more interested in talking to the women than my man character, even though i greeted him first. Also, most of my male friends are friends with my woman characters. Men mostly want to interact with my women characters, they seemed to not care as much about my man or non-human characters. (It's the women who like to interact with my man and non-human characters.) This, as well as other interactions I've seen, got me thinking about interactions (and perhaps friendships) between men, in Second Life. Someone made the suggestion a while back that friendships between men weren't as common as friendships between women. Maybe there is some truth to this statement? And perhaps, this could be true of positive and genuine interactions between men in general, based on what I mentioned in this topic? (But I'm also guilty for not pursuing male friendships myself in real life. Maybe my attitude is common among men in Second Life as well, which explains my observations.) tl;dr summary: -I see at man at Social island 10 more interested in talking to women than men, despite me (a man) having said "hi" first. -Most of my male friends/interactions are with my woman characters. My man and non-human characters are friends with and interact with women.) -Someone made an observation that male friendships weren't common a while back. -Maybe there's truth to that statement, and perhaps also true of positive and genuine interactions between men? -I'm also guilty of not pursing male friendships in real life. Maybe that's the attitude the SL men have regarding them.

One of my woman characters. She's still very much a work in progress.

I will! Thanks for the encouragement! @Marigold Devin Great minds think alike I guess!

Here's my attempt at a "Prince Charming" type character. Note that I portray him as not exactly a "good guy" but a villain actually (inspired by deconstructionist fairy tales).

No I think it's fine that you don't voice. I don't voice that much either, like I said in my original post I only voice during certain situations. I mostly type.

-Do you use voice in Second Life? -If so, how and when do you use it? (Use it all the time, or is there conditions to where and when you use it?) -Do you think you have a good voice? (Apologies if any of these questions have been done before.) I occasionally use voice in Second Life, but not all the time. I'm mostly a typer. I only use it when the other people have initiated the conversation with me in voice. Since I have a distinct voice, I only use it while playing certain accounts/characters (usually my alien, shapeshifter, or fishman characters, since not even my human male characters resemble my real life self.) If I'm playing a female character I try to avoid active places with voice. I said before I have a distinct voice, and I don't think it's very good. Talking-wise I talk too fast and I think people don't understand me, and singing-wise I think I'm tone deaf.

That's cool. Happy to know a fellow 86er! And I read through the rest of the thread. Thank you all for your input, advice and encouragement, I really appreciate it.

Ah no, I don't think I'm transgender. I'm pretty sure on that part. Thanks for the input. Yeah I just wanted to share my thoughts is all. I also want to see if people have similar experiences I guess. Encouragement is nice, too.

I totally agree with what you said in your third paragraph, and overall you paint a nice picture of your childhood and your reasoning for your male SL alt. I think the judgmental nature starts when we're toddlers....

I elaborated on different reasons why I chose female characters/avatars on those other threads. I don't think I've mentioned my "lack of masculinity" as a reason before. The last thread I had regarding gender wasn't about my reasons but whether I should put my real life gender in my profile if I remember correctly. (Oh yeah, I also had a "I was creepy" thread but again that was a different topic.) I apologize if this topic seems redundant.

I agree, I guess it's still prevalent today.

Like other men who play as female avatars, I admit one of my reasons for doing so are the typical ulterior ones (I'd prefer to look at a woman than man, etc.) There are also maybe less nefarious reasons I'd so as well (want to experience life from different perspectives and so forth.) However in this topic I'd like to relate to what I was like growing up and perhaps what I'm like now. It involves the concept of "masculinity" and the pressure for boys and men to conform to this ideal. I was a 90s American kid (born in 1986.) In the 90s ideals were somewhat less progressive than they are today. LGBTQIA+ weren't as widely accepted as the use of the terms "gay" and "*****" as insults were commonplace, especially among boys and young men. And masculinity was held in high regard in society and promoted widely among the media. McDonald's had action figures and vehicles for "boy toys", and dolls and plushies for "girl toys". I never perceived myself as particularly "masculine" in my life, even though I was subject to peer pressure and bullying about it. I was not a strong or physically imposing person. I was also very mild-mannered and quiet. I wasn't really interested in playing sports or play fighting. I mentioned the McDonald's toys before; in addition to the "boy toys" I also had no qualms about getting the "girl toys" if I were interested in them as well. As my school classmates made fun of Barney the Dinosaur for being purple and thus "gay", I didn't join in their chants. And speaking of those insults, people used them against me and that reinforced my belief that I wasn't very masculine. (Although I think they made fun of me more for my seriousness, high sensitivity, and social awkwardness.) I still am rather mild-mannered as I was as a kid, but I think one of the reasons I play women in video games (and in turn virtual worlds) now, is because of my previous experiences of not feeling masculine. I mean, I don't think I'm particularly "feminine" either (I once described myself as "middle of the road" in terms of masculinity and femininity.) But given this fact I can't really relate to the hyper masculine ideal in addition to the other more common reasons I have, I think I would gravitate toward playing as female characters/avatars. Tl;dr: I think one of the reasons I play female avatars/characters in virtual worlds is because I never felt really "masculine" in my life, in combination with other more typical reasons like "admiring characters", "wanting to see different perspectives", etc.

I don't do much except decorate my parcel and attend parties at clubs. I also wear Halloween themed avatars.

I just saw there was massive disapproval to the idea. There's no use challenging your viewpoints because I agree with you all for the most part and like Scylla alluded to, I was just thinking out loud for the most part. In other words, I know it's a half baked idea anyway....

Wow, didn't know about that. Thanks for the info!

In an MMO I've played, MapleStory, users have the ability to increase or decrease the "fame" rating of other players. It didn't affect much except it for being cool I guess. Players (if I recall correctly) had a one month cooldown before being able to assign another fame point to another player. I was wondering what you think if Second Life had a similar thing for other residents - a "fame" rating or what's also known as a like/dislike rating for each resident that can be changed by others. It seems cool but I can see it being abused (for example, alts may inflate the rating of one resident, someone writes a script that affects someone else based on their "fame" rating, access to things can be affected by the "like" rating, etc.)

I've seen videos of Youtube trolls manipulating various types of people in Second Life by taking advantage of any "quirks" the victims have.

Raven Bell. You can find it in the Marketplace by searching "Rapunzel Hair" or "Floor Length Hair".

This is one of my several woman accounts. Yes I know, she probably needs work. I have given her a pair of heels and changed her dress since the taking of this picture.

"Random Person"