Yes, I agree with everything you said. I guess that what I am asking or looking for is to know if my approach is right from a technical point of view. Since I more or less made up what seemed to work there is still the question of is the approach right.
For example, to get a highlight on the lips do people use a multply layer or a soft light layer, do you over paint on the Mesh Map to extend the color over the base lips? Do I really need 8 layers and so on. Trial and error is fine but time consuming and given that people are already doing it well, like yourself no doubt, I am simply curious about how the look was achieved and what I can learn from it. Does that make sence?
Artistry is another matter entirely and after the technical understanding it is that which makes, as you say, all the difference.
All the best